I was one hundred percent sure Cade had no idea about Ryder's diagnosis by the time he finished his rant session. He'd been on a major downward spiral of emotions as he continuously circled back to why, outside of Ryan, I'd been the only person Ryder associated himself with since graduation. Of course I'd just sat and made gestures for him to go on, because at the end of the day, I wasn't going to be able to answer. It wasn't my story, nor my place, to tell Cade what was going on.

When his hoarse voice finally gave out, I waited a couple minutes to ensure he wasn't going to continue before I answered.

"This is something you need to talk to Ryder about, Cade." I said softly. "It isn't my place to say anything."

"Does he really have cancer?" Cade breathed out, barely audible. "I thought that was just a stupid ass rumor someone made up. But. . . but the fact he won't even answer a God damn text tells me something more serious is going on."

I'd never really spent a lot of time around Cade, definitely not as much as my jock and cheerleader best friends had. He'd always just been in the background, one of the teammates, one of the party goers, just one of them. But he had always worn a huge smile that never seemed to waver.

But with Ryder's sanity went Cade's optimism. Neither of them were the boys I'd known in high school, but were growing into men my heart ached for. They both looked so lost and broken and tried everything in their power to mask the emotions.

"I need to get home before the streets flood more." I stood, avoiding Cade's pleading look. "I suggest you do the same."

I'd never been someone to really be open with any emotion, but I knew that the sympathy I felt inside was displayed openly across my face. I could tell by the way Cade stared at me.

"Zoey, I. . . if something is wrong with him, don't you think I should know?" He croaked. "He's my best friend."

The guilt of what I said stuck around for a few days after they left my mouth. But bitchy comments had always been my way of hiding my own feelings.

"If he didn't say anything," I turned my back to him and squeezed my eyes shut, clenching my hand into a fist. "then maybe you should take that as a sign to leave it alone."

*

Drenched in rain and freezing, I wanted no part of dealing with anything except my bed when I parked my sister's car in the driveway.

Of course neither of the Blake boys seemed to get the memo when I wanted to be left alone, and always just paraded themselves right into my personal bubble. As soon as I shut the door and locked the car, I spotted Ryder perched on the porch steps, head down. My eyes shot toward the driveway next door, surprised to find an empty driveway. Ryan had been home since graduation, and if he was gone, Ryder almost always accompanied him.

"Hey." Ryder said without looking up as I approached. "You busy this weekend?"

Considering it was Thursday night and all I had was some college prep to go over with Max tonight, I wanted to say no. But the mischievous glint in his eyes had me wishing whatever idea was in his head would dissipate, or at the very least, not include me.

"Maybe." I eventually said. Both of us jumped a good three feet in the air when a clap of thunder echoed through the neighborhood. My anxiety skyrocketed, and it took every ounce of dignity I had to still stand before him and not run into the confinements of my house like a scared little girl.

"I thought we should probably get started on the list." He pulled a brochure from his coat pocket and waved it in front of me. "You promised me, remember?"

"So what if I do have plans?" I said quickly, pulling the brochure from between his fingers.

"Zoey Summers, you do not do anything but get forced to go to parties with your friends. You don't have plans. Well, I mean, now you do. Make sure to pack for a couple days rather than just one, just in case another Monsoon decides to pop its unwanted head in."

I huffed out a sigh, staring at where it was at. I nearly had a heart attack seeing the address. "That's like four hours away. That's Nevada, Ryder."

"I'm aware. But you promised, Zoey. And come on, wouldn't you love to see Nevada?" The smile on his face surprisingly didn't reach his eyes.

"Maybe if we were in Vegas." I shook my head. "But we're literally gonna be in the middle of like nowhere."

His eyes flickered with irritation. "You're coming though, right?"

No.

"I promised you, Ryder. So yes, I guess I am. But how the hell are we getting there? Because I know for a fact my sister isn't going to let me borrow her car for two and a half days?" I questioned, laying the brochure in his hand. He made a gesture with his thumb behind him, and a sickening feeling immediately started churning my stomach.

"Ryan has a truck, in case you forgot."

"It's bad enough I have to spend the weekend with you, Ryder. But now I have to spend it with Ryan too? And on top of that, squeezed in between both of you." I wanted to deny the invitation to go then and there, but his words rendered me speechless.

"Look, Zoey, I know you don't even want to be around me, but I appreciate you doing this for me. I don't want Ryan to go either, but he's the only one with a car and won't let us go if he's not hovering over me twenty-four seven."

I stood in front of him for a few seconds, watching raindrops fall against his damp hair and roll off and down his flushed cheeks. Wanting to get inside before another clap of thunder could turn me into a five year old girl, I nodded and started toward my porch.

"Yeah, Ryder. I'm free." I grumbled. "And I guess I'm coming."

**

"No, absolutely not." Max repeated for the tenth time.

I fought the increasing urge to roll my eyes and hugged my pink fleece throw around myself, watching him spin childishly in my computer chair a few feet away.

"It isn't your decision to make, Max." I pointed out. "It's mine and at this point I really wish you'd just let it go."

"So you actually feel comfortable being with both of them? Alone? Nobody to come to your rescue and pick you up or save you." He said through his teeth, a muscle in his clenched jaw twitching.

I fell back against my pillows behind me. "They're not serial killers, Max. They aren't going to do anything."

"You don't know them, Zoe."

"You don't either." I stated. "So stop it, please. It isn't even your problem. I was just letting you know."

He stood so quick that the chair spun a few times behind him. His entire demeanor had gone from my fun, quirky, idiot best friend too an ass in less than five minutes.

"Anything that concerns you is my problem, Zoey."

"You aren't my dad, brother, or boyfriend, Max. Even if you were, I'm eighteen in two weeks and then my parents don't even have control over what I do."

He sat on the bed beside me, grasping my forearm a little too rough for my liking. "You think that this is all fun and games, don't you? You think, because you didn't get to do anything fun, or out of the box in high school, that you have to make up for lost time, right? Well you don't have to do that with them. You don't know what kind of shit you're getting yourself into, Zoey."

I pushed my blanket off and climbed off the edge of my bed, my irritation finally getting the best of me.

"Are you sure you're actually concerned about me and not the fact that I'll be with a guy that isn't you?"

It took a lot for me to reach my breaking point and explode, but once I did it was hard for me to come back down from it.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You don't hate the fact that I'm going somewhere, you wouldn't care if I left with Gabby out of town. You give a shit because it's Ryder and Ryan Blake I'm leaving with." I snapped.

He stood, still looking confused. "Obviously, I've told you that, I—"

"No, Max. You'd be that way if it were any guy, not just them." I crossed my arms over my chest. "You're in love with me."

The anger drained from his face so fast it was almost as if it hadn't been there in the first place.

"I. . . I. . . you. . . I don't know what you're talking about." He sputtered, confirming every suspicion Gabby had voiced for the last three years. His dark eyes were everywhere in my room but me, his cheeks growing redder by the second.

We stood there, for the first time in seventeen years, in an awkward silence. It felt as if all the air had been sucked out of me and I was struggling to breathe. The one person in the entire world that had remained at my side through thick and thin, I had the risk of losing when I needed him most.

I opened my mouth to speak, and for a moment thought Max was just going to walk out. Instead he stalked across the room and kissed me. I shoved him off immediately, shaking my head. My mind was still trying to cope with the fact that Gabby hadn't been crazy, that she had been one hundred percent correct in everything she ever thought. What was worse is I would have to tell her before she found out from someone else, including Max himself.

"Get out." I whispered, clenching and unclenching my hand at my side.

"Zoey—" He tried, but I met his eyes and he instantly shut his mouth.

"Get out!" This time he bowed his head and grabbed his bag from the computer desk, ducking out of my room without another word. I turned away from my bedroom door, blinking the tears from my eyes, wanting to laugh hysterically at the fact that my window was still wide open, and even better, both of the Blake boys had been watching the scene that had just played out like we were their main source of entertainment.

Ryder didn't even try to hide the shock, he was staring at me with his mouth gaping open and eyes wide from his open bedroom window. Ryan's emotions were a little more sheltered, but the one that did break through was almost a pitiful look. I crossed the room and stood in front of the window for a moment before staring Ryder dead in the eyes.

"I hope you enjoyed the show." I had to say it loud enough to be heard over the drizzle hitting the roof. Ryan squeezed his brother's shoulder, to which Ryder deflated and walked out of the room. For a moment Ryan and I just stared at each other. Finally, he nodded slowly and closed his brother's window. He drew the blinds seconds later, leaving to stare at no more than a dim light bleeding through and on to the dead flower garden that lay a few feet away.