I will write you this song

And take back what's ours

Would that be enough?                                                            --A Rocket to the Moon

“Not now, guys. Please? Just, not now.”

Chuck was about to open his mouth and shoot out another annoying question when Reed gave him a whack on the head.

“You heard him,” Reed said, turning to me. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” I smiled.

Ricky, Reed and Chuck looked at each other. They weren’t convinced.

“I’m okay. Okay?” I jumped into my bed and buried myself under the sheets. “I’m just… tired.”

I couldn’t breathe. And it had nothing to do with the fact that I was smothering myself with a pillow. Three years of waiting just to be dumped all over again. I couldn’t see the point why I still tried. Or why I’d been so stupid.

“Come on, Leon.” It was Ricky.

I felt the corner of my bed shift. I threw the pillow and the sheets away as I scooted up. “I’m done! Don’t you get it? I’m done with it!”

Ricky got to his feet. “What? You’ll give up just like that?”

I took in a long, deep breath before I could speak. “It’s… what she wants.”

“That sucks,” Chuck commented.

“Big time,” I answered, staring blankly at my lap. “But the world’s not gonna stop just because I got dumped.”

“Yeah.” Chuck nodded. “The world is still gonna rock because we’re still here to rock it!”

We all shut him up with sharp stares.

“Completely inappropriate,” Ricky said to Chuck. “What do we do now, Leon?”

I shrugged. “After the launch, we go and forget this all ever happened.”

Once again, I packed my bags which I’d never really unpacked for the last three years. I watched them being wheeled out of my room. And I wondered if I’d ever set foot near Boston ever again.

I hoped I won’t see Sarah. Still, half of me wanted to hop in a car and drive to Hopkinton. Maybe stalk around her house. See if she was there. And face her for the last time.

“Leon?” It was Moira. “We’re ready when you are.”

I gave her a nod and pushed myself off of the bed.

Moira’s stiletto’s clacked against the thinly carpeted floor as we went.

“Chuck and Reed are saying goodbye to their family members,” she said, looking at me from the corner of her eye. “All nine of them.”

“Hmm… Trouble.” I walked ahead. “Must’ve turned the lobby upside-down.”

“And backwards,” she nodded, chuckling awkwardly. “But they make the blonds happy. What can a manager do?”

I didn’t answer.

“People we care for… they’re not always perfect, you see?” Moira stopped. “They can make you go mental and cause you hurt of all sorts. But you still love them all the same.”

I tilted my head back and breathed out. “You’re not going to change my mind, you know.”

She smiled at me.

“I’m not trying to. Because I know what really goes on in there.” She touched my forehead with an index finger.

I could only shake my head. “No, you don’t.”

I was first in the car.

Ricky must be with his Gran. Reed and Chuck with the Fergusons. Nate was in LA with Dad. Even Elle went to London to be with her family.

I had never felt so alone in my life. I couldn’t help but think that maybe I was meant to be by myself.

Suddenly, I heard knocks from the window. It was Reed.

“Someone wants to talk to you,” he said.

The car door across me opened. Someone slid into the backseat.

I looked away. I was in no mood to talk to anyone. Not even Paul McCartney.

“I thought you ended this… whatever this is,” I muttered, thinking it was Sarah.

A shrill laugh filled the car. “Yeah, if I was Sarah. Maybe I would.”

I turned to find out the owner of the familiar voice.

“Becky?”

“Who else?”

I tried to smile. To think of something nice to say. I should put up a front. Like I was happy seeing her. It had been a long time after all. In the end, I just sighed and shook my head.

Reed cleared his throat. “I’ll leave her to you,” he said with some sort of warning in his voice.

That reminded me that Reed had a crush on Becky way back in high school. It was obvious he still hadn’t gotten over her just yet.

Once we were alone, I found my voice. “How on earth did you find me?”

“Duh.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re Leon Walden. Your whereabouts are pretty much televised all over the world, all the time… Reed contacted me.”

“Why am I not surprised?”

She shifted on the seat so that she was now giving me an all-out disbelieving look. “Both of you are so stupid. You and Sarah… you know that?”

“Who doesn’t?”

Becky crossed her arms in front of her. “Then why are you going away?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s been three years, Becky.”

“So?” She waited for an answer that never came. “You’ve been stupid for three years, Leon. Between you and I? That’s not a very normal thing to do.”

My brows knitted. “Are you saying I’m not normal?”

“In a way,” she admitted. “You waited for Sarah even if you don’t have the slightest idea when or if she would ever want you back. You waited for her. You loved her from faraway; from wherever on earth you at. That’s the stupidest, sweetest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. And now, you’re giving up just like that?”

“She wants me to.” My voice was small.

Becky’s blue eyes widened. “And you let her have her way? Of course, Sarah would do those kinds of things. She’s stupid! Just like you!” She breathed out and placed a gentle hand on my shoulder. “That’s why you’re perfect for each other.”

“Is that a compliment? Or an insult?”

“That’s not the point!” She rolled her eyes and let out an, “Ugh!”

“What do you want from me, Becky? What?” My voice was louder than it should have.

Becky sighed. “Sarah’s totally going to kill me this time.”

She opened her bag and pulled out a small leather-bound notebook. Before I could ask what it was, she took my hand and placed it on my palm.

“I want my best friend to be happy,” she said. “Even if she, herself refuses to.”

I stared at the notebook for five seconds. Mechanically, my fingers flipped the pages. Right then, I knew what it was. “This is…”

“Sarah’s diary. Don’t ask me how I got a hold of it,” Becky cut me off, rubbing the side of her head.

I shook my head. “What’s the point?”

“Read it.” She got out of the car. “Read it, and you’ll see the point… in all this.”

Then, she took off.

Ten minutes ago, I’d already made up my mind. I wanted to leave. To forget. But Becky just had to come and mess me up all over again. What was there to know except that Sarah wanted nothing to do with me anymore? Or that she had pretended to stay in touch with me with those premade letters.

My head felt like it was about to explode. In the end, my weakness got the best of me. I needed to know what she had to say for herself.

So I read the first page I set my eyes on.

Then, I was out of the car.

“Leon?” Ricky startled me with a tap on my shoulder. “You… alright?”

“Yes. Yes.” But I was shaking. Because I didn’t know then what I knew just now. And it all made sense. “I just have to…”

Ricky followed me as I went back into the hotel lobby. “Dude?”

“Where’s Moira?” I suddenly stopped and turned to Ricky. “Never mind. I’ll just look for her.”

“What is up with you?”

“Nothing.” I sat on the armrest of the nearest chair and thought for a moment. Next thing I knew, Chuck and Reed were already standing in front of me. “I have to go to Milford Regional.”

“Moment of clarity,” Chuck guessed, grinning.

Reed nodded and slapped me on the back. “Remember to thank me someday for this.”

Milford Regional hadn’t changed much since I went here to have my cast removed three years ago.

I walked the hallways, looking for familiar faces. Instead, memories came to me. And they weren’t good ones.

In no time, I found the help desk. The woman behind the computer glanced momentarily at me before typing again. “Yes, what can I do for you?”

I fixed my glasses on the bridge of my nose and pulled my beanie down to my face. “Uhm… I want to access a patient’s record. She’d been confined here three years ago.”

“What’s the patient’s name?”

“Sarah Johannes Littman.”

The woman nodded without looking at me and kept on typing. “Yes. We do have a record of that patient. How are you related to her?”

I stopped to think. “I’m her… uhh… brother.”

The woman lifted her gaze from the computer screen and gave me a long hard look. “Do you have any document to prove that?”

Pocketing my hands, I smiled. “Not at the moment, I don’t. But—“

She raised a hand and smiled back. “Unless you have the necessary identification or a legal authorization stating that you are indeed a family member of said patient, I’m afraid we cannot disclose any information. Please come back when you have complied.”

“Okay.” I stepped back.

It seemed like I won’t get anything through legal means. So I headed out of the hospital.

Maybe I should just talk to Freddy.

I was on my way to the parking lot when I heard someone call my name.

“Leonard? Is that you?”

I turned around and saw a stout, dark-haired woman in her forties. She was wearing a light blue scrub suit like the nurses inside the hospital. She had a smile on as she waved at me. And then I remembered her as the nurse who took care of me and Sarah when we were hospitalized here three years ago.

“Hi…” I just couldn’t remember her name. “Uhh…”

“It’s Myrna,” she said. “It’s okay. People don’t usually remember my name. But you, I remember. You and Sarah. Cases like hers kind are hard to forget.”

I nodded half-heartedly. “S’not every day someone you know gets amnesia.”

“It’s not because she had amnesia,” Myrna laughed, fondness evident in her eyes as they lingered on me for a little while. “It’s because it isn’t every day you get to see two people who are truly meant for each other.”

“Pshh…” I snickered humourlessly. “Hate to break it to you. But… a lot happened these past few years.”

She placed a hand on my shoulder, gently shaking her head. “That’s the point, isn’t it?”

My brows knitted.

“The whole universe conspires to set you apart, hurl fireballs at you, and you still feel the same”—she pointed a finger on my chest—“in here. Doesn’t that mean you are meant for each other?”

“You don’t know that for sure.” I looked away. “Sarah… She”—I quoted with my fingers—“conspired with the universe. How can I top that? Besides, she… doesn’t want to have anything to do with me anymore.”

Myrna raised both her brows. “But you do.”

It took me several seconds to realize she was right. But I just shrugged.

“When Sarah was confined here during her surgery, she was always writing. She was always taking pictures. She kept saying she didn’t want to forget things… and you,” Myrna said wistfully. Then, she glanced at her watch. “I have to get going. My shift’s going to start in a few. It’s nice seeing you though.”

“Yeah. You too.”

Myrna was already heading to the entrance when she stopped and said, “Oh. And by the way. If you see Sarah, please tell her I didn’t find the necklace she was looking for. I’ll keep looking though.”

“What necklace?”

“She said it’s a silver necklace with some kind of blue crystal pendant.”

“Sapphire,” I corrected thoughtlessly.

“Yes. Sapphire. Shaped like a teardrop, if I remember it right. How did you know?”

My mind was racing so fast, I didn’t bother to answer her question. “And she was looking for it?”

“A few months ago, yes. She said it’s really important to her.”

“She said that?”

Myrna nodded, backing away. “I’m going to be late.”

Next thing I knew I was running to my car. Before I opened the door, I shouted, “Myrna!”

She sighed and stopped again.

“I think you should be a therapist! Where do you get all these things?”

She let out a quiet laugh. “This is what happens when your life gets stuck in the last paperback you’ve read.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi guys!

Remember me? No? Can't blame you. Been gone for a long while. (Dodges rotten tomatoes) But I'm back for more and hopefully, here to stay. Expect two or more chapters for HTDAN, then I'll be focusing on Reapers and 31 Days. Hope you enjoyed reading. 

Now you see me,

Shim :)