FGHfhsudvjcsdgy;;, I'm, like, so sorry this is so totally late, you guise. Psht, and sorry if it seems...crackish...~ *high on Sharpie* Ja...Ich bedauere so... (Yeah...I am so sorry...)

Enjoy...? :D

Drei: An Awesome Ending (?)

When most people wake up after a night of drunk, violent sex, they don't remember what happened right away, and have to be reminded.

Prussia was too awesome for that. He remembered everything as soon as he woke up.

He remembered the sight of Matthew's terrible, almost feral (but so sexy) smile … the taste of Matthew's lips (maple syrup and Spanish wine) ... the smell of Matthew's body (salty sweat) … the feel of Matthew's breath when he whispered "Awesome." Into Gilbert's ear (so awesome it turned him on) … the sound Matthew made when he slid into Gilbert (wait, that couldn't be right, it must be the other way around; Gilbert was too awesome to bottom) … Matthew, Matthew, Matthew … every single awesome detail.

The Canadian himself, on the other hand, wasn't quite so lucky.

When he woke up, all he felt was that his head hurt. A ton. It was like Francis was humping inside of it or something. (Oh, mon dieu, horrible image. Someone find this guy some brain bleach.) He was also, even though he'd only just woken up, extremely tired, as if he'd been up until very late the night before.

What had happened the night before, anyway?

He remembered some awesome Spanish wine, some awkward attempts at dancing, some more awesome Spanish wine, a pair of lips on his, and … it all went black.

Well, there were also memories from his alter ego – the drunk, badass, fighter, Viking-esque Canada – but he was too scared of his alter ego to even look at those.

The hung over Canadian groaned weakly and rolled over in bed, wishing someone could make this damned headache go away.

I bet Gil could make I go away. Or he could distract me until I forgot about it … he'd be good at that …

For some reason, Matthew's mental images of Gilbert "distracting" him were much more vivid than they were the last time he imagined them.

Suddenly, the bed practically bounced up and down as someone sat down on it.

Why was someone on Matthew's bed? Why was someone in his room, for that matter? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED THE PREVIOUS NIGHT?

"Oh, you're awake! Guten morgen, Mattie! Kesesese!"

Oh, well, speak of the devil.

The Prussian was grinning widely, practically glowing with happiness. Matthew wondered why, and then figured that he'd probably met a hot girl the previous night and had great sex with her. Then, he wondered why he was jealous of the anonymous hot girl.

Ahem.

Anyway.

In one of Prussia's hands was a half-empty beer bottle and in the other was a wurst. His hair was in no semblance of order, but that simply amplified its sexiness. And, well, there was another thing, something that the Canadian was trying his hardest to ignore, but failing hugely …

The albino was completely and totally naked. Butt naked. Not a scrap of clothing on his body. Clad in only his birthday suit.

However you put it, it was awesome.

Matthew was trying very hard not to openly drool.

Gilbert, of course, idiot that he was, thought the Canadian's staring was directed at his beer and wurst.

"If you want some," the Prussian said, "you'll have to get it yourself. This awesome breakfast is for The Awesome Me and The Awesome Me alone."

"I … I think I'll order room service," Canada stuttered in reply.

"Okay, sure." Prussia grabbed a telephone from the bedside table and searched in the hotel directory until he found the number for room service. "Whaddya want? Make it awesome, though, because –"

"Awesome people can only eat awesome food, I know," Matthew stated in a monotone.

"So, I'll get you some beer and wurst, then?"

"No!" the Canadian exclaimed.

"What?" The Prussian was confused. "What food could be more awesome than beer and wurst? Besides me, of course."

Okay, weird images from that one, Matthew thought. Though, strangely, I don't want any brain bleach this time.

"Pancakes and maple syrup,"' he explained.

"I don't think The Awesome Me has ever tried that. Therefore, it must be un-awesome."

"But it's The Awesome Me's favorite food, therefore it's very awesome!"

"Mattie! You're really learning! How awesome! As an awesome reward, I'll let you order whatever you want."

"Awesome."

~~~

Fifteen minutes later, Matthew had an awesome plate of pancakes and syrup to eat and an awesome Gilbert to ogle, but he still didn't know what had happened the previous night. And since Gilbert, even though he obviously knew what happened, also thought Matthew knew what happened, and thus acted like the entire thing was completely normal, the situation looked uncomfortable.

Merde, I'm going to have to actually ask him if I ever want to find out, the Canadian thought. I'll be able to do it and he'll give me an answer, because I'm awesome, but … ugh. I'll ask him after I finish this pancake. Or this one. Or maybe this one. Or …

"Wow, Mattie, you eat fast," Gilbert remarked, taking a swig of beer.

Matthew looked down and found that he'd devoured the entire plate of pancakes and syrup.

Merde.

Okay, Matt. Be awesome. You can do it, it's no big deal, just be awesome.

"Gil, what happened last night?"

And I didn't even sound nervous! I really am awesome. The Canadian mentally gave himself a high five.

"Huh? You don't know?" Prussia was surprised. "I thought someone as awesome as you would definitely remember something as awesome as last night! I mean, I remember every single awesome detail, and, I'm telling you, it was awesome. But you should know that, right, because you were there …"

"GIL!" Matthew shouted impatiently. "Just tell me!" Ow, now his throat hurt.

"Okay, okay, okay …" the Prussian looked down at his beer bottle and his normally pale face turned light pink. "The Awesome Me fucked The Awesome You."

"Eh?"

"The. Awesome. Me. Fucked. The. Awesome. You."

With the sort of effort it takes Spain to not glomp Romano after they haven't seen each other for an entire hour, the Canadian resisted the urge to start one of his infamous rambling panic attacks – Oh, mon dieu, no! That can't be true! I always wanted my first time to be special, not drunk, and I can't even remember it, and I wish I did, because it was with Gilbert, and thus really awesome, but I can't remember it WHY CAN'T I REMEMBER IT?

The old, un-awesome Canada would have simply said all of that, but the new, awesome Canada had other plans.

Plans like this:

He grinned as shyly and sweetly as he could – did Gilbert just stop breathing for a second? – and asked, "Was it really, really awesome?"

"Y … yeah," the Prussian whispered. His red eyes twinkled mischievously, and then he added, "Want me to show you how awesome it was?"

Oh, dieu, how was Matthew supposed to respond to that? He would go with his awesome instincts … but his awesome instincts were telling him to say, "Yes!" and attack Gilbert's lips with his own. What?

Okay, Matt. Just be awesome. You're awesome you're awesome you're awesome Gilbert is sexy you're awesome - AHH! HOLY SWEET MAPLE, WHAT IS HE DOING?

"You had a little bit of syrup on your cheek," the Prussian explained, removing his tongue from the cheek of a very flustered (and turned on) Canadian.

"Oh, and, um … Mattie?" Gilbert added a bit nervously. "Does it … hurt?"

"Does what hurt?"

"Your vital regions. I'm usually kinda … uh … violent when I invade vital regions, and …"

Oh. That. Ah. He thought about it, and … oh, that was strange, especially since he was – or, well, used to be – a virgin …

"Well," the Canadian said slowly, "they don't. At all."

"Weird," the albino mused. "Mine hurt quite a bit."

Suddenly, his face went white. Whiter than it already was. And here Canada thought it wasn't possible.

"Mattie, do you realize what this means?"

"Eh?"

"You topped."

"I did what?" Matthew nearly squeaked. "But I … I've never even had sex before!"

"Really?" Gilbert looked thoughtful. "You seemed pretty experienced. You were really violent and strong, and you kept growling at me … it was awesomely hot …"

After the shock – Gil called me hot! – wore off, Matthew figured it out. "That was my alter ego, the drunk, badass, fighter, Viking-esque Canada. He comes out when I get really drunk."

"Ah. Well, that makes sense."

Then, the Canadian had a horrible thought. What if Gilbert only wanted to … ah … have sex with him when they were drunk? What if he only liked the drunk, badass, fighter, Viking-esque Canada, not the normal Canada? Matthew wasn't entirely sure why he found this so horrible, but he did.

Luckily, it wasn't the case.

"Next time, let's do it when we aren't drunk, okay?" the Prussian said. "I think it'll be more awesome that way."

Next time? So there will be a next time! Mathew found himself grinning happily like someone who has discovered that his love is returned.

Oh, wait …

Anyway.

The Prussian saw, and returned the grin. It was such a wonderful, glowing, joyous, awesome grin that Matthew decided to act on his awesome instincts.

~~~

Gilbert Awesome Beilschmidt was happy.

Not a lame, Feliciano kind of happy, either, but an awesome, I-beat-that-Hungarian-bitch-in-a-fight kind of happy.

As for why, well, that should be obvious.

He was making out with his Mattie, and his Mattie wasn't drunk, but still enjoying it. He'd been scared that Mattie would only want to fuck while drunk (hey, that kind-of rhymed, kesese) but … not true.

Well, of course it wasn't true! Who wouldn't want to be fucked by (or fuck) the awesomeness that was Prussia and his five meters?

… Don't answer that.

He was also happy because he figured it out – all that awesome Spanish wine helped him realize why he valued the Canadian's happiness above his own. Now, he just needed to wait for an awesome time to tell Mattie …

Meanwhile, making out was awesome.

Gilbert ran his fingers through Matthew's soft, golden hair, pausing to tickle the Canadian's ear, making him giggle. The two nations melded their lips together like they never wanted them to come apart, pushing and licking and biting until they were out of breath. When they did stop to breathe, Matthew let out a breathless "Gil!" that made the Prussian's lips return to the Canadian's with full force. Matthew grabbed Gilbert and pulled him closer, his hands like vines, twisting around Gilbert's body.

You know, all the normal things that happen when two guys are awesomely making out.

Suddenly, there was a loud BAM and the door to Matthew's hotel room burst open.

The two awesome nations looked up, irritated, to find …

"Bruder, what is going on?"

"Oh, so you guys are lovers now? That's great, ve!~"

… Germany and Italy interrupting their make-out session.

This did not make either man happy.

Unhappy Prussians and Canadians are bad for your health.

Especially if your name is Ludwig or Feliciano.

~~~

A little while later, Matthew was having second thoughts.

"Are you sure that was necessary?" he asked nervously. "I mean, they did have good intentions. Getting us to the meeting on time and all that …"

The Prussian scoffed, finding and pulling on his shirt. 'That doesn't matter. They still interrupted our awesome fun, which was un-awesome, so they were awesomely punished. Man, I can't believe we forgot about the meeting," he added, finding his pants.

"We?" The Canadian pulled on his favorite t-shirt, the one that looked like his flag. "You might've forgotten, but The Awesome Me didn't. I simply had more awesome things to think about."

Gilbert laughed. "You've learned well, young padawan."

"Yeah, but …" Matthew sighed. "I still don't know what I'll do for my speech."

"Oh, you'll be fine," Gilbert assured him. "You know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you're awesome. And ich liebe dich."

"Eh?"

"Gott, do I have to repeat everything when I talk to you? Un-awesome, Mattie."

"GIL, I DON'T SPEAK GERMAN!"

"Right … well … ich liebe dich. I love you."

"… Oh."

Staring into the albino's bright, ruby-red eyes, Matthew finally realized what he'd subconsciously known for days … weeks … months … since he'd first met the Prussian.

"I love you, too."

"And that's why your speech will be awesome! It'll be so awesome, it'll be Prussian!"

"No, it won't."

"It won't?"

"It'll be even more awesome than something Prussian. It'll be ..."

"What?"

"… Canadian."

"Hello, everybody. I'm Matthew Williams, otherwise known as Canada. And I just wanted to let you know that I'm awesome, I know it, you should know it, and I'm not going to be ignored anymore. In fact, anyone who ignores me, forgets my name, doesn't notice me, or doesn't at least consider my opinion when I voice it from now on will feel the wrath of my hockey stick. Thank you."

~~~

DON'T DOUBT THE WRATH OF CANADA'S HOCKEY STICK, GUISE. IT'S VERY...UH...MANLY AND...UH...WRATHFUL. And also very Canadian. 

Any-who'z, please review or die~ ^.^

Danke~