Sandali pa kaming nanatili sa kwarto at nag-usap-usap pero lumabas din naman kalaunan. I was feeling a great sense of relief when we went back to the top deck. It was as if a big amount of burden was alleviated.

Nakakapanibago na ganito kagaan ang nararamdaman ko at parang mas madaling huminga. Ngayon ko lang din napagtanto kung gaano kabigat ang dinadala ko.

"Hoy! Saan kayo galing ha?" Iyon ang pambungad sa amin ni Sugar nang makabalik kami sa top deck. May hawak siyang microphone at iyon ang ginagamit sa pagkanta at pagkausap.

Hanggang ngayon, nagka-karaoke pa rin sila. Malas nga lang at si Sugar ang kumakanta.

"Kayo na ulit, noh? Sabi ko na nga ba! Sis boom pak!" Aniya, sa microphone pa rin nagsasalita.

Marami pa siyang sinabi pero hindi ko na iyon nakuha. 'Yong mga lalaki, nasa may isang mesa at naglalaro ng baraha habang ang mga kaibigan ko naman ay nagkakantahan kasama si Gia.

"This song is brought to you by the one and only Shaunelle Gavriella. Beer by Itchyworms," ani Sugar at tinuon na ang buong pansin sa screen kung nasaan ang lyrics. "Nais kong magpakalasing..." pagsimula niya.

"Wow, so hindi kapa lasing sa lagay na 'yan?" Ani Galaxy sa isa pang mic.

Nagtawanan kami dahil sa narinig. Pumunta na ako sa mga kaibigan at nakikain.

Nang gumabi, magkasama kaming naghapunan bago nagsibalikan sa mga suites namin.

Tulog na ang mga kaibigan habang nahihirapan naman ako sa pagtulog. Pumunta na lang ako sa may pool area ng suite namin at umupo sa isa sa mga sun loungers at doon nagpahinga.

Malamig ang ihip ng hangin at maliwanag ang sinag ng buwan. Our suite was overlooking the sea and it was such a calm sight to behold. Everything in my surroundings looked so tranquil that even just by looking around, the peacefulness started to rub off on me.

"You look okay."

Nagulat ako nang bigla na lang may nagsalita sa likuran ko at muntik nang malaglag sa kinauupuan. Hindi pa nakatulong na nang tumalikod ako, nakaputing nightgown ang kaibigan at kahit wala naman siyang ginawa, nataranta pa rin ako.

"I'm not a white lady, London," ani Vanilla sabay nguso.

Umupo siya sa tabi ko; sa mismong sun lounger na inookupahan ko. Kasya naman kami pero isang maling galaw lang ay may isang malalaglag talaga. Napansin din iyon ng kaibigan kaya tumagilid siya ng higa at niyakap ako, mukhang nagpapalambing.

"You look okay," pag-uulit niya. "I actually thought you were gonna break down or I don't know... I just didn't expect that you'll be this peaceful after you two left the deck."

Napangiti ako sa narinig. It's nice to hear that I look peaceful. I guess that talk really helped.

Niyakap ko pabalik ang kaibigan at ipinatong ang ulo sa taas ng kaniya at nagsimulang magkuwento. Alam ko namang hindi siya nagtanong pero gusto ko lang talaga siya sabihin.

She listened earnestly and didn't once speak. But I'm sure that she has a lot to say after I'm done.

"Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit ganoon ako karupok pagdating sa kaniya," I admitted with a pout.

Vanilla chuckled. "That's just who we are as humans. We become soft for the people we truly care about."

Napatango-tango naman ako sa narinig. Hinintay kong magsalita ang kaibigan pero mukhang nag-iisip pa siya.

"Can I say something?"

I nodded at her question so she continued, "I'm actually mad at Orion because he hurt you. But now that you shared to me what you guys talked about, I can now understand why you're like this. Naiintindihan ko na kung bakit sa isang pag-uusap niyo lang, tila naglaho at nakalimutan mo na ang mga sakit na idinulot niya."

"Yeah, I agree," a voice from behind spoke, making Vanilla and I shriek and panic which caused us to fall from the sun lounger.

Tinulungan ko ang sarili na makabangon at nakitang si Caramel pala iyon. Sinamaan siya namin ng tingin ni Vanilla ngunit nag-peace sign lang ang baliw.

Bumalik kami ni Vanilla sa dating posisyon habang si Caramel naman ay umupo sa paanan ng sun lounger.

"I thought you guys knew that I was here," ani Caramel. "I followed Vanilla when she went out."

Napailing na lang ako sa kaibigan at pinatuloy na ang usapan.

"I agree with Vanilla, London," pag-sang-ayon ni Caramel sabay tango. "I think the reason why it's easy for you to accept him and to let go of the resentment because you understood his reason. You know that what he did hurt you but you understand him. Plus, he didn't cheat on you nor hurt you physically. In short, may dahilan ang lahat na nangyari sa inyo at sa tingin ko, kahit nasaktan kayo, ikinabuti niyo naman iyon."

"Allow me to add," si Vanilla. "May dahilan ang lahat na nangyari at naiintindihan mo 'yun. Nagkakaintindihan kayo kahit nalilito, kahit hindi pa lubusang mabuti ang sitwasyon ninyo, kahit may kaunting sama ng loob pa. Iyong iba nga, hindi katanggap-tanggap ang mga dahilan pero binabalikan pa rin. Pero iyong sa inyo, wala ka namang dapat na ipag-alala."

The three of us became silent after that. I absorbed their words and tried reflecting on them.

"I'm actually envious because I also want that kind of love," Caramel shared, breaking the silence. "It's too deep and pure that even after the years you spent apart, you can still understand each other—"

"—the way you secretly look at each other still didn't change," Vanilla added. "From the birthday party of Mrs. Alvarez years ago until today... still the same," Vanilla said with a dreamy sigh.

"Yeah... it's just so..." Caramel trailed off, looking like she wanted to say something but is having a hard time in finding the right words. "...it's just so... ugh! I can't explain it! Basta gets niyo na 'yon."

Natawa kami dahil sa kaniya. But now that we're talking about this, my overthinking mind was still able to find a way to make me feel anxious. Thus, I opened it up to them.

"In my opinion, that hesitance is from your overthinking mind creating these hypothetical scenarios," Caramel said with a smirk as if reading my thoughts.

"I'm sure you know that we have this 'negativity bias', right? Negative experiences tend to stick more than positive ones and influence us. So in your case, your heartbreak is the 'negative experience' which I think is the root of all the negative scenarios you overthought about. The mind is velcro to the negative. So now when things are starting to go well, instead of reacting to it with open arms and full optimism, your mind which has been used to all these heartbreak thoughts, is now reminding you of those... scaring you and making you think that this might lead to another heartbreak as well. It's your brain trying to keep your heart safe."

Vanilla smiled proudly at Caramel's words. She looked like a proud mama.

"But deep down in your heart, you know that you want to be with him," Caramel continued. "So I say, take the risk again. It's not everyone who's lucky enough to meet a guy like him."

"True!" Vanilla agreed and started nodding aggressively. "I want that too but..." she trailed off, then waving her hand dismissively. "Anyways, it's quite weird, you know? The person who broke your heart is also the one who can heal it. It's just scary and fascinating at the same time that a person can have such power."

I don't know why but we started talking about deep topics. Gone were our usual chikkas about nonsense. It's like one of those late night talks we used to have when we were in still in high school.

Mabilis ang paglipas ng mga araw at sa isang iglap, pabalik na kami sa kaniya-kaniyang buhay.

Iisa lang ang flight namin ni Orion pabalik ng States. Tulog ako buong biyahe kaya nang makalapag ang eroplano, gutom na gutom ako. Nag-aya si Orion na kumain at hindi ko na tinanggihan.

Sa isang Chinese restaurant na malapit sa condo ko kami tumungo. Pagkatapos naming umorder, nagtinginan lang kami, parehong walang alam kung paano sisimulan ang usapan.

His mouth opened, about to say something but someone arrived. It was a petite woman with a classy demeanor. Sobrang mahinhin ang kilos at may kung ano sa kaniya na napapamilyaran ko.

"Vero, hey," she greeted Orion and pecked his cheeks. My brows shot up but I remained calm. There's no need to overreact.

She stood beside Orion and eyed me, then tossing her blonde hair in a snobby manner.

Now that her hair caught my attention, I'm starting to get this weird feeling that I saw her hair before but not her face.

"Madison Brightly," she introduced and offered her hand. "Architect."

"London Farello. Engineer." I gave her a sweet smile before shaking her hand.

She made this cocky expression and shrugged, then turning to Orion. "I'll see you at work, Vero." She even stressed the word "work" as if implying something!

Bago siya umalis, hinagod niya pa talaga ang balikat ni Orion at ngumisi sa akin.

"We're just colleagues," aniya na parang may kasalanan siyang ginawa. "She's one of the architects in our projects."

Chill, London. Chill.

"Okay," I replied with a smile.

Habang kumakain, ang laman ng isipan ko ay kung bakit parang pamilyar ang babaeng iyon. But I guess I just watched a lot of Barbie movies and she reminded me of those.

Pagkatapos naming kumain, hinatid niya ako sa condo. Nagkita lang ulit kami noong nag-meeting kami tungkol sa proyekto namin.

Minsan, sa opisina ako nagtatrabaho pero kadalasan talaga, nasa site ako. Walang araw din na lumipas na hindi kami nagkita ni Orion at hindi magkasamang kumain. Most of the time, we eat lunch together. But if one of us have errands during lunch time, we have breakfast or dinner together instead.

Alam kong busy din siya pero hindi siya kailanman nawalan ng oras para kamustahin ako o yayain akong mamasyal.

Feeling ko tuloy magjowa na ulit kami... magjowang walang label.

"Is that even a thing?" Tanong ko sa sarili at natawa na lang sa mga naisip.

"What's your plan for summer?" Nakuha ni Orion ang atensyon ko nang bigla siyang magsalita.

Kumportable siyang naupo sa sofa at naka-dekwatro pa talaga.

Nandito siya ngayon sa office ko dahil dito kami nag-lunch. Hindi kami sabay na makakapag-dinner mamaya dahil may appointment daw siya. Akala ko nga aalis na siya ngunit tinatamad yatang magtrabaho ang isang 'to.

"Summer plans? I have work, you know," I answered, then bringing my eyes back to the reports I was reading.

From my peripheral view, I saw him make his way towards my table. He sat on the visitor's chair in a manner that made it seem like we were about to discuss an important business matter.

Now that he got my attention, I put the files away and leaned on my swivel chair, waiting for his next move.

His piercing eyes were focused on me, making me a bit conscious. And while he was still busy looking at me, I also had the chance to study him.

He was dashing and regal in his dark blue suit. He pulled off his usual business attire so well that it seemed like he's about to attend an extremely formal event.

His already tanned skin became a shade darker because of our Greece getaway and could now effortlessly pass as one of those Caribbean models. His clean cut hair suited him well, flattering his facial features well—

"Done checking me out?" He asked, a small grin playing on his face.

I smiled inwardly because of that. Since he's the one who started this, I might as well tease him back.

"Almost done but you interrupted," I said with a pout.

He licked his lips and swallowed hard. "Continue then."

Aba, ayaw magpatalo, ah!

Because of his reply, I decided to up my game as well. I leaned towards his direction and placed an elbow on the table, then resting my chin on my palm. I tilted my head and bit my lower lip while my eyes never left him.

Dinala ko ang tingin sa ibaba para may kaartehan at dramatic effect. At nang binalik ko na ang tingin sa kaniya, ang isa niyang kamay ay mahigpit nang kumakapit sa arm rest ng upuan.

"Done!" Nakangisi kong sabi.

"So what do you think?"

I shrugged. "Pwede na."

"Pwede na? That's it?" He asked in disbelief.

I chuckled because of his reaction, making me want to pinch his cheeks.

Dahil sa naisip, iyon nga ang ginawa ko. Umalis ako sa upuan at lumapit sa kaniya at saka pabirong kinurot ang magkabila niyang pisngi. "Don't worry, you're the most handsome in my eyes," I said with a wink.

"Really?" Aniya, biglang napapaos.

"Yup," I said with a nod, bringing my face to his ears. "You look... delectable," I whispered the last word before bursting into laughters.

"Easy there, you wild woman," he laughed.

"Rawr!" I said with matching hand gesture.

Tumawa siya dahil sa ginawa ko. Matagal ko nang hindi nakita ang ganitong klaseng ngiti at tawa niya.

I'm really glad that even after what happened between us, we could still act comfortably around each other.

"So, back to your summer plans," aniya. "Aren't you going to visit your family?"

"Now that you mentioned it, I think I might," sagot ko at naupo na pabalik sa swivel chair.

Napatingin ako sa kaniya at mukhang may gustong sabihin pero nagdadalawang-isip pa.

"Can I, uh, come with you?"

Ngumiti ako at saka tumango. Excited siyang pumalakpak at saka nag-ayang magplano. Iyon ang ginawa namin hanggang sa may tumawag sa kaniya. Bumalik siya sa kaniyang opisina habang ako naman ay pumunta sa site.

"Engineer," a honeyed voice called from behind.

Kasalukuyan akong nasa office tent dito sa site. Napatingin ako sa likuran at nakitang nasa may entrance si Architect Brightly.

Lumapit siya sa akin habang kagat-kagat ang labi. She tucked some strands of her hair behind her ear before sitting on one of the couches. She then tapped the space beside her, signaling me to sit as well.

She heaved a dramatic sigh and faced me. "Engineer, I don't know how to tell this to you but, uh, Vero and I are about to get married," she started. "I don't know what reasons he told you but we have been dating since you guys broke up. He only came back to see if you still have feelings for him and also to explain his side. He wanted to be free of the guilt of hurting you."

Oh, not again!

"Really? Because based on what he told me last time, you're just colleagues. And if you two really are in a relationship, then why is he with me all the time?" Tanong ko sa nangungutyang tono.

Instead of answering me, she only sighed and raised a hand. And there on her ring finger was a diamond embedded ring.

"It's okay if you don't want to believe me. I just wanted to help." She sighed dramatically again before leaving.

I'd be lying if I say that I'm not surprised. But then, I believe Orion. So before I assume and overthink, I'm gonna clarify this with Orion.

Hindi kapani-paniwala ang sinabi niya. Maniniwala lang ako kung si Orion mismo ang magsasabi niyon.

Umalis ako sa site at dumiretso sa kaniyang opisina. His secretary wasn't around and the door of his office was left opened.

I was about to knock when I heard Jarvis' voice. They sounded like they were having an important discussion so I decided to leave instead.

But before I could take a step, I heard something that caught my attention.

"Of all the things you could lose, you lost the fucking wedding rings," Jarvis said in a displeased tone. "She might kill you because of this."

Wedding rings?

"Wow, very comforting words you have there," Orion replied. I could hear in his voice that he's panicking.

Patuloy silang nag-usap at hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ako umalis at patuloy lang na nakinig.

I was about to walk into his office and ask if I could talk to him but Jarvis spoke again.

"By the way, you'll have dinner with Brightly's parents later, right?" Jarvis' question made me stop on my tracks. "I can't believe that she stayed."

The rest of Jarvis' words were drowned by my pounding heartbeat. Ang mga sinabi ni Brightly kanina sa akin at ang mga narinig ko sa usapan nina Orion at Jarvis ay konektado! Wala nang ibang explenasyon kundi totoo nga ang sinabi ni Architect Brightly!

Mabigat ang damdamin akong umalis sa opisina ni Orion at dumiretso sa sariling opisina. Kailangan ko ng kausap at ang unang pumasok sa isip ko ay si Zio.

"Hello, Zio? Guess what? I'm brokenhearted again," panimula ko. I then started telling him what happened and he patiently listened.

Kararating ko lang sa opisina at heto ako, nagra-rant sa kaibigan habang nakasandal sa hamba ng pintuan at hindi na talaga makapaghintay.

"I really think you should still go ask him," he advised. "I also think that what you're planning to do is impulsive."

"Thanks for your advice but it would hurt even more if I hear it from him," sabi ko at saka tinawag ang sekretarya.

I'm gonna ask her to book me a flight back to Europe while I go pack my things but she wasn't responding to my calls.

"For a while, Zio." Umalis ako sa pagkakasandal at naglakad palabas para makausap ang sekretarya. "Please book me the earliest flight—" I stopped dead when I realized that my secretary wasn't around and it was Orion who was outside my door.

"Orion..." I called.

Nanghihina niya akong pinagmasdan bago pumwesto sa upuan ng sekretarya ko. Minasahe niya ang kaniyang batok at pagod akong tinitigan.

Napatingin ako sa cellphone at pinatay ang tawag namin ni Zio. Hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin kay Orion dahil mukhang narinig niya ang usapan namin ng kaibigan at alam niya na alam ko na ang mga pinaggagawa niya

"You seriously believed her?" Aniya.

"I heard your conversation with Jarvis," maikli kong sagot nang hindi siya tinitignan.

"If you heard everything then you wouldn't have thought of leaving," he said with a sigh.

Bago pa ako makasagot, nag-ring ang cellphone ko at nakitang tumatawag si Sugar.

For some reason, I wanted to avoid this conversation with Orion so I answered Sugar's call.

"London! Are you with Orion? Could you please tell him that we found the wedding rings already and that it was my sister's sister who took them!" Pambungad niya. "I can't believe that her obsession would lead to this! Stress na nga ako tapos dinagdagan pa ni Maddie! Hindi ko nga alam kung maaawa ako o maiirita."

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko sa narinig at unti-unting sumulyap sa banda ni Orion. Seryoso ang kaniyang mga mata at mukhang hinihintay lang na matapos ang tawag para makausap ako.

And that's when I knew that I messed up.