Eclipsepaw woke up to the sound of a cat making a beeping alarm.

"Beep. Beep. WindClan is attacking. Beep."

Groaning in annoyance, Eclipsepaw threw her moss pillow to the side and stumbled groggily out of the den. The battle had been going on for half an hour before Eclipsepaw woke up, since no one dared wake her even for this.

It was another attack from WindClan that seemed to have no purpose whatsoever except that they were bored and had a huge meaningless grudge against ThunderClan. Who knew that Onestar's influence would last so long.

Eclipsepaw yawned before launching herself at the biggest enemy in sight, ripping the cat apart with ease before tossing him/her to the side. This went on for about 2 more minutes before something actually interesting happened.

Eclipsepaw was going through her 15th WindClan warrior when someone across the entire camp caught her eye.

"Stonepaw!"

Stonepaw froze from the apprentice he had been fighting, standing up and walking over to his girlfriend without any trouble from the fighting cats.

"Hey, um, babe! What are you doing here?" He asked nervously.

"I live here." Eclipsepaw responded, pulling a 'cut the crap' face.

"Oh, um, what a coincidence!" The tom responded, basically pouring with nervous sweat by now.

He was about to say something else before being cut off by a slap to the face. "How could you!" Eclipsepaw cried. "How could you fight with your Clan, who has lovingly raised you your entire life, against my Clan?!?!"

"I'm sorry!" Stonepaw sobbed. "I shouldn't have suggested ambushing ThunderClan when our unnamed leader asked us what we wanted to do today!"

"You did what?!" Eclipsepaw shouted, cutting off Stonepaw's attempt to explain himself with another slap to the face. "Are you even committed to this relationship?!?!"

"I am!" Stonepaw yelled. "I know probably shouldn't have bragged to my clanmates about my secret relationship with a Mary Sue protagonist from ThunderClan!"

"Ugh!" Eclipsepaw said in disgust. "If you don't commit to this relationship, what are we gonna do about the baby?!"

"What?!?!" Stonepaw screamed in shock. "A baby?! How is that even possible?!?!"

"Wait." Eclipsepaw flipped through this book. "You're right. We haven't even made physical contact yet."

"I'm so sorry!" Stonepaw sobbed. "I shouldn't have led my Clan to attacking yours!"

"Well it's too late now." Eclipsepaw sighed. She slowly walked up to Stonepaw, leaned in close, and PUNCHED HIM RIGHT IN THE FREAKING FACE SO HARD THAT HE WENT FLYING RIGHT BACK T-.

~~~~~~~~~~

Eclipsepaw sighed, staring up at the sky. For no reason at all, the night sky reminded her of Stonepaw.

"Welp. I guess we all learned a valuable lesson today. Never date a WindClan apprentice." Eclipsepaw concluded, looking at the camera calmly.

She took out her phone and opened up a dating website. "I wonder what the apprentices are like in ShadowClan?"