Turning off my phone doesn't mean it won't be there when I wake up.

I brush the metallic Galaxy Prime out the way, as I stretch. Its glistening figure catching light from that filtering through the curtains enchants me a bit, and I give into its beck and call.

I unlock it, because I hid my notifications with vague messages like "1 text message" "5 Kik messages" - and this, albeit, is why I do not even try to use my phone often...because...I cannot help but succumb to my desires to use it - and so, now, I can now see them.

It really isn't important. I answer here and there, little replies. I wanted to try to keep from this thing. But I noticed there were no messages from Sid - the Kik name of my boyfriend. Boyfriend. That sounded weird.

So I brushed my hands through my naps and proceeded to cereal, brushing away only slightly angrily in my groggy voice my father's irking security questions as I creak across the hallways: "Who's that?"

"Your daughter?"

"My daughter, who?"

"Asia."

"What are you doing? -"

"Walking across the hallway," we both say, together, but each with questionmarks at the end for different reasons.

"Okay," he says, the bed creaking as he turns back over. Even so, the fact that his door is cracked to hear everything I do is creepy enough to make me feel watched.

I chomp on my non-ninjaly-grasped cereal. 

Still no message. I needed to figure out why. 

Later on that day, I text him to figure out why. 

"I was out with my friend. We went to Bestbuy. The computer specialist didn't even know anything about computers. We had to explain everything to him."

Oh ...that's what they did today, while I was chomping on cereal and whatever else I could find in our poor, middle class house, trying to have a life outside of worry. 

That day, I texted many friends. They told me exactly what to do for this situation. I talked to my boyfriend, openly, about it. He agreed....texted me every morning. He compromised with me, because he cares about me. 

I cannot let it down. My phone is my poison and my antidote...it's one of the only ways I can be with him.