From Àmbar:

"Thank you so much, Louis. Your help means the world to me. I hope everything works out and I can make her happy".

To Àmbar:

"What are friends for?! I will be there and don't worry. Everything will work out and she will love you even more".

From Àmbar:

"If you say so ;) Now go back and pay attention to Sean".

"Are you quite done? I feel neglected" Sean niggled childishly.

"Quit it, you baby" Louis pocketed his phone. "I'm all yours now".

"I'm not sure I believe that" Sean squinted his eyes at him.

"Can you stop being an idiot, so we can continue skating now?" Louis propped his hands up on his hips pointedly.

"You were the one who answered his phone, not me" Sean pointed out matter-of-factly.

"But now you're the one wasting our time" Louis countered skilfully, grinning broadly.

"Sometimes I really hate you" Sean grumbled but grabbed his skateboard nonetheless.

"I know you love me" Louis winked exaggeratedly at him.

"Only maybe" Sean muttered under his breath.

After being done with their bickering, the two boys jumped on their skateboards and drove off. Back in the day, they've done this at least twice a week and right now, Louis was realising how much he had missed this. How much he had missed Sean, if he was already being honest. It felt good to get a part of his old life back although in a completely new way but it was even better.

They skated for quite some time until they reached the sportsfields of Domumley and stopped there. Sean took out a football he had had in his backpack and they played for a bit. Louis had missed football just as much as skating. It felt like breathing again.

"Damn, this was great" Sean panted out when he sat down on a bench to drink some water. "I know you hate cheesy but I have to say it. I've really missed this. I missed you".

"Me too, Sean" Louis sat down next to him, feeling exhausted and dehydrated but freaking unstoppable. "Screw the cheese".

"Hell yes!" Sean exclaimed cheerfully.

"I really missed you, Sean" Louis nudged Sean's elbow and then his expression turned serious. "And the rest, too. You know, playing football and skating and just having fun with friends in general".

"I know you don't wanna talk about this but I just know it was my brother's fault. It's a feeling I can't shake away and I saw the way he treats people that he claims to care about" Sean tried to make eye contact with him but Louis kept his eyes down.

"I don't think he is capable of caring about anyone other than himself. At least not in a normal human kind of way without hurting someone" Louis opened up to Sean for the first time.

"I know he hurt you. It's pretty obvious to me but ... what did he ... in which way ... I mean, did he ...".

"Believe me, Sean. You don't wanna know. He's family. You have to see him at least ... I don't know. Five times a year? I don't want your dynamic to change because of me" Louis hoped to make it clear that the truth would change everything.

"I think you have a wrong picture of our dynamic. We never got along. He always pretends that we do but I hate him. To me, he has always been a horrible person and I tried to keep him away from you when I realised he had his mind set on you but I failed and I will never forgive myself for not being capable of protecting you from him. He's married family but not my family" Sean cleared up and Louis was baffled. He didn't know that. Kyle had always told him about how close Sean and he were and how that was a good enough reason for Louis and Sean to stop being friends. Kyle said he could never date his brother's friend.

"Wow, I don't know what to say, to be honest. Kyle always made it seem like you were so close and such good brothers, that I was terrified when we met again. I thought you could never be my friend again because you'd be on his side, no matter what" Louis told him honestly.

"I could never be on his side" Sean stated strongly. "He took my best friend from me and hurt him. I could never defend Kyle".

"Yeah, he really did. I might even say in every way possible. He really managed to not leave one option open" Louis confirmed bitterly, feeling like he could tell Sean how bad his brother really was without going into too much detail.

"Wait ... do you mean he ... Louis, what did he do?" Sean dared to ask, sounding absolutely terrified.

"Apart from controlling me, my life and my every move? Well, he always put me down and made me feel like worthless shit. He put thoughts into my head and manipulated my mind to be completely in his power without a way out. I wasn't allowed to do anything really, only things he wanted. He ordered me around, bossed me around and always reminded me that I was nothing. That he was doing me a favour by being with me. In front of people, he was so possessive and demanding and a weird kind of jealous. I wasn't allowed to have friends and he didn't want me to go to uni and I was actually ready to obey. That is the worst part. I did not see what was happening. I thought it was normal and Kyle was right. I thought I deserved to be treated like this. I thought I really needed to cut myself down and change my attitude and behaviour to please him and stop him from leaving me. I even managed to find more and more excuses for his abusive behaviour. I always blamed myself and told myself I deserved every single punch but then ... he started being distant and barely paid attention to me anymore, so I 'misbehaved' to get his attention back. That made me finally see that something was off, not fully yet but partly. I understood that I was giving him everything and he was only taking everything and never giving anything back. So, on the day I came here I ... I only wanted ... he ... To be honest, it wasn't the first time but never so painful ... He said I was ... I didn't ... I couldn't ... Sorry, I just can't ..." Louis' voice broke away when he felt every punch and thrust and word of that painful moment again all over his body.

"No, Louis. It's okay. It's totally fine. You don't have to ... I think I understand" Sean hurriedly pulled him into a hug, not without making him flinch a little bit but Louis felt good in his arms. "I'm completely shocked and so angry. I knew he was a monster but damn it, he really is a bigger monster than I thought".

Louis was only able to nod and let out a quiet whimper, snuggling closer into Sean's chest. Letting him know had felt good and relieving. It has been easier though because he had known.

"Thank you for telling me. I promise to keep this a secret and not tell the other guys. I swear on my life. They don't need to know but I guess Jonah does, right?" Sean stroked gently over his back.

"Yeah, I told him after we saw him in town. I wanted to tell him anyway but that just triggered me so badly that I had to let him know" Louis let him know, untangling himself from Sean.

"I remember that day. I realised that you left because of him and I just knew something horrible must have gone down. Um ... I err ... couldn't help myself that day and went right over to him, with Harry. He acted so surprised and nice and disgusting and presented his new girlfriend to me. It all made me wanna throw up and call him out but Harry was there and we were in the middle of the city. I ... I think he still got it" Sean admitted guiltily.

"I get it. I was very close to walking over to him and slapping him but that urge wasn't present enough during that time. By now, I would do that, no matter who'd be around" Louis told him honestly. "But I wanna tell Harry anyway, so ...".

"Really? Why?" Sean studied him closely, a smirk threatening to break through. So, it looked like Sean knew that as well.

"I think you know why" Louis felt shy again.

"But I wanna hear you say it. I could be wrong. You could just be close friends like you and Jonah" Sean looked pointedly at him.

"But Harry isn't Jonah. He is different and apparently, me saying that all the time makes it obvious" Louis sighed frustrated.

"Says who?" Sean wondered befuddled.

"Harry's sister" Louis said simply.

"You met his sister? How? When? Why?" Sean was lost.

"She showed up yesterday at the house to fix things. She didn't know he was here with us and she accepts him for who he is. We talked a bit and at one point, we were left alone and started talking about Harry ... and me. Our connection. She was so sure we are more than friends. I mean, she isn't completely wrong. Harry has a crush on me and I told myself that's what she saw but ...".

"He told you that?" Sean's eyes grew big.

"Yeah, he did. He wanted me to know. Nothing else" Louis smiled fondly at the memory.

"That sounds like him. He's really gone for you. It's annoying" Sean tried to take any pressure from him. "But did I get that right? Is Harry maybe not the only one?".

"Looks like he isn't" Louis revealed quietly.

"That's beautiful, Louis" Sean smiled softly at him.

"Maybe. I just don't know what to do and now you know why. He is still in my head. The fears won't just go away and the aftermath is there. Big and ugly and never-ending. I was too scared to admit my feelings to myself because the last time I let someone in I was hurt massively. I have so many quirks now, that are not cute. I don't wanna do that to him. Maybe he thinks he can fix me or heal me or whatever but he can't. No one can. This isn't fixable. The only thing I can do is leave this in the past and work my way through it but that will take a long time. I'm not sure I can have another ... a new relationship already. I don't think I can be what he deserves right now. Or ever but that's beside the point" Louis opened up about all of his doubts and fears and thoughts.

"What did Jonah tell you after you told him all this?" Sean asked surprisingly instead of giving him a pep talk.

"He told me to give myself time and allow myself to be happy at the same time. He said that healing and leaving the past behind takes time but doesn't mean I have to be alone during that. That if Harry makes me happy I should let him in as far as I can and don't ask too much of myself" Louis repeated his words.

"And he is right with that. I couldn't have said it better. Harry knows bits and pieces, right?" Sean asked knowingly, so Louis only nodded in confirmation. "Good. And you wanna tell him everything. That's a big step and that you want that shows how important he is to you and that you wanna keep him in your life. You like him and you were able to admit that already. That's huge, Louis. He will understand that you need time. I think he already does know that. He told you about his crush but didn't expect anything in return, right? He knows you're not ready but still wants you around. He will give you all the time you need and do everything at your pace".

Listening to Sean had made Louis realise that he was right and Jonah was as well. He could relax and just let it happen. He could trust Harry with all of his past and his present and his fears and doubts and worries and feelings. He could definitely do this and let himself be happy if he gave himself the chance to. If he gave himself some time to heal in some way. If he took the pressure off himself and accepted the fact that Harry wasn't Kyle. He would never demand Louis to just take him although he wasn't ready.

"I wanna tell him" Louis blurted out but as soon as the words were out he knew they were true. Sean looked at him in shock. "I mean, I want to be as honest with him as he was with me. He deserves to know it isn't one-sided. He needs to know I want this, I want him but I need time and patience. Then he can decide if he is willing to give me that or not".

"I know he will. He wants what's best for you" Sean assured him, still definitely taken back but confident in his words.

"He is what's best for me. As far as I can tell" Louis admitted with red cheeks. "Only one way to find out".

"I'm really proud of you for wanting to do this. It's pretty brave. When I see you being so courageous and facing your fears I almost feel like a wimp. I should really man up and tell Chloe how I feel. My situation is laughable compared to yours" Sean seemed to be talking more to himself than Louis.

"You like Chloe? That's amazing, Sean. She is perfect for you" Louis rejoiced. "And don't compare situations. You don't need to have a trauma to be scared to put yourself out there".

"You're right but I still feel pathetic that I can't tell her. And I feel bad for hooking up with Niall again when we were drunk at the party. It was wrong. I just hope his old crush didn't come back and I made him suffer now" Sean bit his bottom lip violently.

"You know about that? I don't think he knows that you know" Louis looked perplexed at him. "But you were both smashed. This isn't solely on you, Sean".

"I know but still. I feel bad. He is a great friend. I just don't feel more than friendship for him although I sometimes wish I would. But if he told you about this does that means I made it ...".

"No, Sean. Don't even go there" Louis stopped him from making up the worst scenarios he could think of in his mind. "We were just talking because I wanted to find out if he had a crush on anyone".

"Why? I thought you like Harry" Sean knitted his eyebrows together in pure confusion.

"I do like Harry. This wasn't about me" Louis retorted, hoping Sean would get it without saying it out loud.

"Oh, God. This whole thing is a mess" Sean threw his head back with a groan.

Louis could only agree with him. "You can say that again".

Louis really hoped this surprise for Aria would work out the way Àmbar wanted it to. Right now, he was entering the big skating hall of Domumley with the two girls and Harry. If Louis didn't know this has been Àmbar's cover to get Aria here he might have thought for a second it was a double date he didn't know about. Which was weird to think about and he really shouldn't do that but he couldn't help it. The idea of being on a date with Harry, a date as cute as this today, made him feel stupidly warm inside, no matter how hard he tried to fight against it because he didn't wanna date anyone. Not until Kyle was out of his head and he could be good enough for someone. Not until he was capable of loving someone.

"Why did you suggest roller-skating again? I don't think I will survive this. Just tell me you wanna kill me" Harry was gripping the railing of the skating track violently.

"We don't wanna kill you. Skating is fun. Aria learned to find the right balance. You can do it, too" Àmbar encouraged him.

"She is right, Haz. It's not that difficult and I'm right here to help you through this day, okay?" Louis tilted his head aside smilingly.

"Okay" Harry blushed lightly.

Tentatively, Louis reached his hand out for Harry to grab and when Harry's hand met his a familiar tingly feeling shot through his whole arm and went down his entire body. He tried to shake away the shivers and goosebumps he was feeling inconspicuously and focused his attention on Harry trying not to break his neck. It was nice to be the one supporting Harry for once. Well, it was already the second time but still. Louis wasn't used to this and didn't know how to handle someone putting their trust in him like this. He didn't know how to handle someone letting him protect them and not always be the victim or weak one.

"You're doing great, Haz" Louis praised him impressed.

"I don't feel great. I just know I will fall down" Harry had his gaze fixed on the track and his skates.

"And? That's part of it. It's normal to fall down, Haz. The important thing is to stand up and try again. To never give up" Louis advised him and was surprised by his own optimism.

Harry seemed to share that surprise because he looked up at Louis and their eyes met. Immediately, Louis felt himself getting lost in the deep ends of the green heaven that was Harry's emerald-like eyes. So beautiful, so fascinating, so addicting.

"Never giving up sounds good to me. Gives me a lot of time to get this right" Harry literally whispered out and Louis felt like this was definitely not about skating anymore. It was clearly about them.

"You're already doing this right" Louis just had to let him know.

"Yeah?" Harry sounded so hopeful that it was tugging on Louis' heartstrings and twisted something in his stomach.

"Yeah".

Beckoning Harry to continue with the skating, the two boys dropped the topic of them right there and focused back on the skating and the task at hand. The task of getting Harry uninjured through this day. With these clumsy and lanky legs of his, that was such a big challenge but Louis was determined to show Harry that he could take care of him as well. That he could keep him safe.

"Louis, you wanna join me for some rounds?" Àmbar came over to them after an eternity with Aria in tow. "Aria can take care of Harry for a few minutes".

"Is that alright with you, Haz?" Louis asked out of habit, fully expecting Harry to tell him to stay although rationally he knew Harry would never order him around.

"Of course, Lou. Go with her if you want that. I'm fine on my own" Harry reassured him with so much understanding but also sadness reflecting in his eyes and lacing in his voice.

"What am I? Invisible?" Aria propped her hands up on her hips.

"You're everything. How about you two get something to drink or eat? That way Harry can't hurt himself" Àmbar suggested, trying to come off as nonchalant and teasing but Louis could tell she was dying of nerves. Shit was about to get real.

"That sounds like a fantastic idea. I need a break and my feet too" Harry backed her up.

"Come on, Louis. Let's skate for real" Àmbar beckoned him to follow her lead and he did.

"Why are you so nervous? Everything will be fine. He agreed to this, which means he accepts her and wants her back in his life. She will be all over the moon" Louis questioned seriously confused.

"I'm always afraid to do something wrong, no matter what it is. But when it comes to Aria I'm the most scared because I love her so much. I don't wanna lose her or upset her, ever. All I want is for her to be happy" Àmbar reasoned her behaviour honestly, sounding very vulnerable.

"I get it, A" Louis made them stop to put an arm around her shoulder. "But you really don't need to be nervous. After this, she's gonna marry you right on the spot. Trust me with that".

"Don't put that thought in my head. I will not propose before we finish uni" Àmbar pinched his arm playfully.

"If you don't invite me to that wedding I will be pissed" Louis teasingly warned her.

"You're gonna be my guest of honour" Àmbar snorted amusedly. "Let's get a bit closer to get a better look. He's right over there".

Louis and Àmbar skated over to the other end of the track and leaned against the railing to watch Aria more closely. Right at that moment, a brunette young man was approaching her and Harry was the first to spot him. He tapped Aria on the shoulder, which made her turn around in question but then she spotted the man and her jaw dropped. Before Louis could register what was happening, the two of them were hugging each other and he could see Aria crying while Harry was trying to keep his own tears in. Àmbar and Louis beckoned Harry to come over to them.

"Wow, that was emotional to watch" Harry breathed out.

"I'm happy I was back here" Louis got off the track and sat down on a bench to take off his skates.

"I'm gonna head over there," Àmbar told them shakily.

"You got this, A. This is your merit. Go and get your kiss" Louis encouraged her to go and relax.

"I will. Thanks, Louis".

A part of him wanted to watch them but another part of him felt so sad when he saw them reuniting that he had to look away. And of course, Harry noticed the change in mood immediately. "Lou, what's wrong?".

"Nothing really. It's just ... that's the second sibling reunion this week and it kinda makes me really sad even though I'm happy for you. I just ... I really miss my sisters and seeing that doesn't make it any better" Louis admitted downcast.

"You never mentioned any sisters" Harry frowned deeply.

"Because talking about them makes me even sadder. I wish I could see them but I can't. They're too young. They have to live with my father and he hates me. He would never allow me to see them and possibly infect them with the gay" Louis told him bitterly.

"How many sisters do you have?" Harry asked curiously.

"I have f ... three sisters" Louis shortly stumbled over his words, his heart aching for his fourth sister in heaven. "All younger".

"One sister was always enough for me but I guess it's different when they're younger" Harry seemed unsure of what to say.

"Yeah, it probably is. They're loud and a handful but lovely and funny and smart. I always tried to help my mum as much as possible. Two sets of twins aren't easy to handle" Louis thought back about his family.

"Two sets of twins? But doesn't that make f ...?"

"Four. Yes, Harry. That's four" Louis cut him off, trying to stay as emotionless as possible. They were in public after all and this was about Aria and not him. "My sister Emily died and that's why I had to 'retake' my last year. That's why I graduated later and was vulnerable enough to let ... yeah, I hate thinking about it".

"I'm so sorry, Louis. I wish I could say something to make this better" Harry looked devastated and defeated.

"I know" was all Louis could say. He knew Harry would make this better if he could. He would and that was enough. "Let's get something to eat and meet Aria's brother".

"Sounds like a plan".

So, that's what they did. Together, they walked over to Aria, Àmbar and Aria's brother. All three of them looked emotional but over the moon happy. When they were close by, Aria looked up at them and smiled so bright it was almost blinding.

"Guys, come and meet my brother. These are Louis and Harry and boys, this is my brother Archie" Aria introduced them to each other excitedly.

"Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you" Harry shook hands with him politely but Louis could only think about one thing.

"That's not really an Italian name. Or Greek for that matter. I thought you're half Italian, half Greek. What did I miss?" Louis blurted out before he could think this through.

Àmbar burst into laughter and Aria only rolled her eyes at him while Harry had that stupid fond look on his pretty face. "We are but my parents failed me with my names. I'm Archibald Rolando Leoní. Italian enough?" Archie grinned amusedly at him.

"Aria definitely has the better name" Louis marked because now it was already too late to make a good first impression.

"You're right with that. Louis?" Archie guessed hesitantly.

"Good guess. I'm impressed" Louis gave him credit for being able to tell them apart on the first try.

"I'm glad I could impress you" Archie laughed freely.

"You two are weird" Aria threw in, making them all laugh.

While they were all talking Louis caught himself staring at Harry way too many times to keep count on. His vibrating phone was the only thing that was able to interrupt his staring for more than a second. He took it out of his pocket and saw a message from Liam. Leaning back against a wall, Louis opened the text.

From Liam:

"How's it going? Is Aria crying out of happiness? Oh, and she forgot her phone in Àmbar's kitchen, in case she is looking for it".

To Liam:

"She is over the moon. It went great. We're still talking. And why are you in Àmbar's kitchen? Are you breaking in? If, then texting me is pretty stupid".

From Liam:

"I'm not breaking in, Tommo. I'm moving my stuff over to her. You do remember that I'm staying with her for a while, right?".

To Liam:

"Oh yeah, now that you're saying that I remember. Your three months at CLPH are over. Course. Sorry. Any idea what you wanna do yet?".

From Liam:

"Kayla said that she mentioned me to Aurelio and he will take a closer look at me at the concert. You know, my work on our songs. If he likes me I could get a job there".

To Liam:

"Wow, that's amazing, Lima. We'll make sure you impress the shit out of him. You're so talented. You'll get that job".

Looking up from his phone, Louis realised Harry was gone. "Where is Harry? What did I miss?".

"He got a call from Niall and went over there" Àmbar pointed over his shoulder.

He followed her motion and spotted Harry by the bench they'd been sitting on before but he wasn't alone and he wasn't on his phone anymore. A way too attractive guy and a pretty girl were with him and animatedly chatting with him. The guy was definitely too close, too touchy and too flirty to pass off as normal stranger behaviour. And the girl was openly checking Harry out. The worst part? Harry wasn't doing anything against that. He didn't stop their flirting. No, he was shamelessly flirting back.

"Who are they?" Louis asked tensely.

"No idea. They came over to him a few minutes ago and just started talking. Why?" Aria told him neutrally.

"Just talking? That's not talking. That's flirting and it's not okay. He's here with m ... us" Louis couldn't stop staring at them.

This whole day had felt like a date to him and they had shared some beautiful moments, that made Louis want to tell Harry what he had figured out and admitted to himself but not anymore. Right now, all he wanted to do was punch someone. How dare he flirted with someone while they were all out together, while he was out with him. Louis knew what jealousy felt like but this new almost possessive kind of jealousy was new to him and made him flip.

Before he could rationally think about what he was about to do, Louis pushed himself off the wall and walked over to Harry, who strangely enough seemed to sense that and turned around to him. Seeing Louis coming over, Harry left the two strangers standing there and approached him but Louis couldn't enjoy that. He was blinded by jealousy and fear and doubts and hurt feelings.

"Louis, come and meet...".

"Who are they?" Louis talked over him coldly.

"Savannah and Kit. They've been skating here ...".

"How do you know them?" Louis cut him off again, making Harry frown at Louis' abnormal behaviour.

"I don't. We just started talking. They're nice" Harry told him.

Louis snorted ugly at that. "Yeah, I saw your 'talking', Harry. It's totally out of place, don't you think? I thought you were better than this but seems like I was wrong. Nothing new there",

"What are you talking about?" Harry was totally lost and that really pissed Louis off. Harry didn't even see that as wrong.

"We're here for Aria, Harry. This is about her and no time to flirt with some random guy! Are you really this needy to get your cock sucked?" Louis snapped at him and rationally, he knew he was overreacting and being irrational but all he could see was red. "You know you can't get it from me and now you're trying to get it from them?! You barely know them! That's pathetic and kinda gross".

Harry's face was unreadable and Louis knew his friends and Aria's brother were listening to them but he couldn't care less. When Harry's face morphed into a pissed-off expression though he did care and something like fear overcame him. He had seen that expression before, not on Harry but on Kyle. And he knew where this would end if it was Kyle. So, out of instinct he got scared and backed away from him inconspicuously.

"Really, Louis? Are you fucking serious right now?" Harry's chest was heaving violently and his hands were balled into fists by his side, making Louis gulp. "There is so much I could say right now to really hurt you back just as much but I won't do that. I'm gonna leave. With Savannah and Kit. And I don't care what you think about that".

"Well, then fine. Leave and fuck their brains out!" Louis spat, his voice lacing with poison and jealousy.

"I will because they want me!" Harry stomped off childlike.

"Unlike me, mh?!" Louis was getting really riled up.

"Exactly!" Harry exclaimed fed up.

"Wanker" Louis muttered under his breath.

"Piss off, Louis!" Harry lost it one more time before he left the skating hall with Savannah and Kit, who looked way too smug.

"What the hell was that, Louis?!" Àmbar approached him now.

"He was pissing me off. He claims to like me but flirts with the next best person while I'm around?! Yeah, he really seems to like me" Louis crossed his arms over his chest in annoyance.

"He does, Louis. He really likes you and cares more about your well-being than his own. He wasn't flirting with any of them, especially not her. You know he is gay. Why would he flirt with a girl?" Aria looked questioningly at him, voice way too soft.

"I don't know but he did it anyway. I saw it" Louis wasn't having any of this. He knew what he has seen.

"She was flirting with him, as was that guy but Harry wasn't flirting with them. He is just naturally charming and kind and sometimes a bit slow to get someone's intentions. He's not gonna go home with any of them" Aria explained what really went down.

"I ..." Louis didn't know what to say. He felt so stupid.

"Why was the idea of Harry flirting with someone else upsetting you so much, Louis? We all know Harry likes you. You know that. I know he told you but he also told me that you don't feel the same. That he only told you to be honest and that was about it. You're still friends but nothing more because you don't wanna date anyone. He never said why. So, I'm asking you, Louis. Why was this such a big deal? Why can't he meet someone else?".

"You don't know anything about us" Louis huffed defensively, touched by the fact that Harry didn't even tell Aria anything.

"Because he won't tell me ...".

"Because that's between us. Him and me and no one else" Louis cut her off again, feeling so protective of their thing. "And yes, I have my reasons why I don't wanna date anyone but they're none of your business. Seeing Harry with them simply pissed me off".

"Why?" Aria asked again.

"Because I like him? Isn't that obvious?" Louis groaned frustrated.

"If you like him why would you push him away like you just did?" Aria's brother Archie dared to intervene.

"I didn't ... I mean, he knows I don't ... I can't ... It triggered me, okay? That's all you're getting from me. He was supposed to be here with me. Not them" Louis was wrestling for the right words.

"But you weren't on a date" Archie stated the obvious.

"Of course not" Louis rushed out quickly but felt weird about it. "But it felt like one until he flirted with someone else".

Àmbar and Aria shared a look Louis didn't understand and Archie seemed to be just as lost. Then, Aria stepped closer to him and let out a long sigh. "Louis, originally my idea was to make this a double date or even a secret double date because I felt the need to help my best friend with his crush but he didn't let me do it. You wanna know why? You wanna know how that conversation went down? I can tell you".

"Is it gonna make me feel even worse?" Louis checked guiltily.

"Oh, definitely but it also might help you do the right thing" Aria confirmed his guess.

"Okay, fine. Tell me. What did he say?" Louis needed to know.

"Well, ...".

"How about we make this whole skating day a double date?" Aria suggested to her girlfriend and Harry, sitting on her bed.

"He would never agree to that. We're friends" Harry declined that idea immediately.

"He has a point. I don't think Louis wants a date any time soon" Àmbar sided with Harry surprisingly.

"Then we won't tell him. We can make it a secret double date to get you two together or just closer. I know how much you like him. You have to do something ...".

"I won't do that, Ari. I can't" Harry interrupted her brainstorming.

"Why? You wanna go out with him, right?" Aria checked puzzled. Harry only nodded. "But he won't agree to a date for whatever reason, right?". Harry nodded again. "Then you have to find a way to take him out without asking him directly. Secret double ...".

"You don't get it. I could never do that to him" Harry exploded, silencing her successfully. "It would look like I tricked him into going on a date with me. Like I forced that date on him and gave him no chance. Like I disrespected his boundaries and I could never do that. I don't wanna make him feel like I'm forcing myself on him to get what I want, ever. I mean, I don't even want this if he doesn't want it. We need to be on the same page and we're not".

"It's just a date" Aria noted weakly.

"It's not. It's so much more than that. We're good the way we are and I only want him to be happy. I will not pressure him into giving me what you all think I want, what he could think I want. I don't want that. No pressure. God, no. Never" Harry was lost somewhere in his own head. "He doesn't wanna date anyone".

"And we should respect that. They're good the way they are, Love. Give it time. Maybe that will change something or just strengthen their friendship" Àmbar supported Harry.

"Okay, fine. Only going skating as friends. As long as you're okay ...".

"I am".

"He really said that?" Jonah stared at him after Louis had recapped everything Aria had told him earlier before he ran away.

"Yes," Louis hid his face in one of Jonas's pillows to suffocate himself to end his misery. "I feel horrible".

"Fuck, I swear that guy is perfect. Like, he is inhuman. I knew he was a good guy but this, shit" Jonah lay down next to him.

"I know" Louis wailed dramatically. "How could I snap at him?".

"Easy. Kyle is the answer to that and I think deep down he knows that. You just need to tell him that yourself" Jonah caressed his back soothingly.

"I can't face him right now. I'm too ashamed" Louis wanted to die in shame. "It was so beautiful to see Aria with her brother but it made me sad and miss my sisters. Harry was so sweet to me but I had to go and ruin it".

"You're gonna fix this. I know it" Jonah was sure of this. "And I get why seeing them made you sad. I don't think I could have handled that. I really miss my sister too".

Louis' head snapped up to look at Jonah and study his face. He looked devastated even mentioning his sister. He had told Louis about her before briefly. Seeing Jonah sad made Louis feel horrible and he needed to do something. Maybe Maria and Paul could help him. He knew Harry would normally.

That made him shoot up and scramble to his feet, startling Jonah. "I'm sorry, Joey. I know we're talking about... I really need to do something right now. I promise I come back to you tomorrow".

"It's okay, Tommy" Louis heard him call after him but Louis was already out the door and on his way.

Without thinking about what to say or what to do or how this could possibly end, Louis barked into Harry's room abruptly without knocking or any kind of warning. "Harry!".

Shrieking out of fear and jumping up startled, Harry stared at him in pure shock. A suspicious part of Louis made him scan the room for Kit or Savannah but just like he thought, they were nowhere to be seen. He really had been unfair.

"I need to contact Jonah's sister" Louis brought out when Harry stayed silent for way too long.

"What ...?" Harry looked so lost. "What are you doing here?".

"I just needed to tell you about my idea" Louis replied shyly.

"Why are you here, Louis?" Harry asked still puzzled.

"I just told you I want to contact Jonah's sister" Louis repeated his words uncomfortably.

"No, Louis. Why are you here right now?" Harry asked again, stronger this time but still staggered. "After today I did not expect to see you in here any time soon and don't understand why you would want to tell me that".

"I just ... Joey mentioned how much he misses his sister and I just have to do something and ... my first instinct was to come here and talk to you" Louis felt really small right now.

"Even after today's incident?" Harry hooked unconvinced.

"Especially after that" Louis retorted timidly.

"That makes no sense, Louis" Harry groaned frustrated. "You told me off earlier but now you're here, acting as if we're good. We're not. Not really. I want us to be but ... How could we possibly be okay after that? I don't understand what happened".

"To be honest, me neither" Louis sighed out, only making Harry frown deeper. "I ... Harry, I'm so sorry for the way I acted earlier. It was wrong and so out of place. You didn't deserve that".

"Why did you snap at me, Louis?" Harry asked a lot softer.

Louis looked up and was met with such a warm look in Harry's eyes that it made him wanna cry over how perfect he was. Instead, he walked closer to Harry's bed, closing the door behind him, and sat down on the edge, far away from Harry.

"When I saw you with them I felt so strange and that makes absolutely no sense but ... I was jealous? I don't know. It was different. I just ... It reminded me of something I had suppressed for so long. A suspicion of mine. He never admitted to it but I just know Kyle cheated on me. I know I wasn't the only one. And seeing you flirting with them after you told me you like me felt like a slap to the face and a punch to my stomach. It felt like I wasn't the only one again, which sounds so selfish because we're not anything" Louis lay all of his thoughts and feelings open for harry to see.

Only focused on his fingers, Louis felt the mattress moving and a moment later, Harry was sitting right next to him, wrapping his hands around Louis' hands tenderly. "Louis, I wasn't flirting with them. By now, I know they were flirting with me but I wasn't interested. You are the only one for me, no matter how you feel about me. But ... your words really hurt me".

"I know and I'm so sorry. I feel so bad for ever saying that. I didn't mean it. You're not pathetic. You're perfect, Haz" Louis had his gaze fixed on their hands.

"I'm not perfect, Lou" Harry contradicted him softly.

"You are to me" Louis finally looked up at him, seeing how much his words were affecting Harry. "Haz, I ... Fuck, I didn't mean to tell you this like ... not after fucking up so bad but ... shit. I had a ... Well, no. I had no plan on how to ever do this but I just need you to know that ... Haz, I really really like you".

"Lou" Harry breathed out in absolute shock, his face showing every single emotion he was feeling. "Are you saying ...?".

"Yes, Harry. I have a crush on you, too" Louis admitted shyly.

After he dropped the bomb it was silent in the room. They were only looking at each other with no idea what to do next. Louis could hear his heartbeat and could feel his pulse racing. He needed to say something, anything. Explain himself to Harry and expound further on how he was feeling and what was going through his heart and mind but he was missing the words.

"I don't know what to say. I didn't expect that one bit. I mean, I understood that you care about me and that we have a special bond but I did not think you were feeling the same" Harry brought out still stunned.

"I wasn't sure how I was feeling but talking to your sister actually made me realise what you are to me. It scares me shitless and I don't know what to do or how to handle it. We saw that perfectly today. I will ruin this as long as he is stuck in my head but I can't seem to get him out. That's why I wasn't ready to admit my feelings even to myself but the prospect of losing you is the scariest thing I could possibly imagine. No matter how many times I wanted to push you away or run away because I was feeling too much at once and your kindness and understanding were overwhelming me, every single time I came right back to you and I will never stop if you let me. I can't promise this will be easy but I don't wanna live without you or watch someone else trying to steal you from me. I wanna be able to tell them off, you know?" Louis put his thoughts and feelings into words, feeling so naked and vulnerable right now.

Harry scooted even closer to him, making their knees touch. "You can always run back to me. I'm always right here. But maybe I can make you feel safe enough to not run away anymore".

"You make me feel safe, Haz. My fears and memories make me wanna run away. I don't wanna run away anymore. It's lonely" Louis locked eyes with Harry bravely.

"Then I'll run away with you. We'll leave the demons behind someday, Lou. But this will take some time and I know that. I know you're scared and that's fine. You've been through a lot and I only know half of it, if so. I can't possibly imagine what must be happening in your mind every time we're close" Harry let go of his hands to change his position. Now he was sitting cross-legged on the bed and Louis copied his actions, facing him.

"A lot. It's chaos. Huge chaos but through all that mess all I see is you and your gentle eyes. It helps. Just like today. As soon as I had my mind set on helping Jonah, I wanted to see you. You're the first person I wanna talk to. I don't understand myself and I'm not used to any of this but I'm trying. All I know is that I want you to myself, as stupid as that sounds" Louis admitted awkwardly.

"That's not stupid. I feel the same. I'm here to help you with everything and won't leave your side unless you want me to" Harry reassured him gently.

"I don't want you to ever leave me again" Louis stated boldly.

"Then I won't" Harry simply looked at him and that look made him squirm in his spot. He didn't know what Harry was thinking.

"Why are you looking at me like this?" Louis asked cutely.

Suddenly, Harry paled and looked panicked, caught. "Please, don't hate me for this but right now, I was thinking about how much I would love to kiss you".

"What?" Louis squeaked surprised.

"Sorry. You look so cute right now and it crossed my mind. Sorry. I know it makes you panic. That's why I didn't want to say ...".

"I really wanna kiss you, too" Louis admitted to Harry and himself. "I just don't know if I can handle this".

"No pressure, Lou. No rush. We don't need to do anything you're uncomfortable with. I still remember your reaction the last time someone kissed you and I don't want a repeat of that" Harry assured him that it was fine not to kiss.

"That was different. With you it's different. I wanna kiss you, Haz. I just don't know ... It would need to be slow, for the start" Louis felt so embarrassed to even say that out loud. He has never had a slow kiss. With Kyle, it had always been rushed and rough.

"Of course, Lou. Whatever you need. Whatever you want. In your time. Whenever you're ready" Harry ensured him lovingly.

"Now?" Louis breathed out terrified.

"What?" Harry looked so caught off guard.

Louis sat down on his knees right in front of Harry and searched for something in his eyes. He wasn't sure what it was but he had the feeling he had found it. Hesitantly, Louis reached out and touched Harry's cheek carefully with his fingers. "Would you let me kiss you right now?".

"Yes," Harry's eyes were so wide ."If you're sure".

"I am," Louis told Harry and himself surely.

"Whenever you're ready, Lou" Harry fluttered his eyes close.

This up close, Louis was left staring at Harry's perfect face. That he gave all the control over the kiss over to Louis made him feel so many things at once. He was completely trusting Louis with this, eyes closed and heart open for Louis to take. Overwhelmed by all of this, Louis leaned even closer and glanced down at Harry's plumb lips, the urge of kissing him overcoming Louis as strong as never before. So, he leaned another inch closer and was getting nervous. Was he even able to kiss someone slowly? How did you kiss someone gently and with feeling and not rushed and brutal and needy? Well, he was about to find out.

Cupping Harry's face for support, Louis closed his eyes as well and finally connected their lips. As their lips touched the whole world stopped spinning around him. Just the feeling of their lips touching was enough to erupt butterflies in his stomach and make him wanna cry out of joy and happiness. When Harry's hand touched his face and started to caress his cheek softly the happiness turned into pure bliss and ecstasy.

Shyly, Louis moved his lips a bit and Harry directly reacted to it in the most gentle way possible to humankind. The way Harry's lips moved so slowly and carefully against his own felt unreal and magical. It was the slowest, softest and most gentle kiss Louis had ever had and never thought was possible. Before this moment, Louis had never thought a kiss like this was a real thing. That realisation made Louis tear up and a few tears rolled down his cheek, which Harry immediately noticed.

"Sh. Lou, what's wrong?" Harry broke away from the kiss but his face was still so close and his hand was still caressing his cheek.

"This was the best kiss of my entire life. Thank you, Haz" Louis sniffled but a smile was breaking through. "No one has ever kissed me like this. So gentle and soft and ... fuck, this was perfect".

"Oh, Lou" Harry pulled him into his chest carefully, seemingly understanding so much from his simple words alone. "I will kiss you like this forever if it makes you this happy".

"I would love that" Louis mumbled contently but then he thought about something and put a bit of space between them, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth. "Was this okay for you as well?".

With a beautiful smile, Harry pressed a short kiss to the tip of Louis' nose, making him wrinkle it adorably. "Louis, this was the most special kiss of my life. Don't ever worry about satisfying me or anything, you hear me? We're in this together. I'm happy when I have you in my arms. This kiss was out of this world, mostly because it was with you. Thank you for your trust".

And Louis just had to lean in again and connect their lips again for one more of these magical kisses. Maybe only to make sure this wasn't a dream. Maybe only because he really wanted to. Or maybe because Harry was addicting and he loved kissing him like this. For now, this was more than enough.

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Fuck, this was a long chapter ... but they kissed. What happens now?