A couple days passed without a word from Kai which wasn't entirely unusual, but considering everything he'd told me at the docks that night I'd hoped for at least a little something. Not knowing what was going on, and not being able to get the information on my own, was killing me.

I was lying on my table listening to music and trying to relax when I felt a shift in the air. Opening an eye, I caught Minnie as she made her way in the room and sat down in the chair beside me.

"You've been quiet lately. More than usual," she said, leaning her head in her hands. "What's going on?"

Soyeon had an idea what was going on with me – or at least that I was running from something and it had something to do with Bangtan – but not enough to get herself or the other girls in trouble. I had to be careful what I told them for their own good.

"Just feeling a little lost, I guess." It wasn't a total lie.

Minnie nodded. "I can understand that. Soyeon said you used to be in a gang, but you left?"

I scoffed and pulled my earbuds out of my ears. "You could say that."

"They kicked you out," Minnie asked, straightening.

"Not exactly," I said, refusing to look at her.

Rolling her lip between her teeth, Minnie seemed to shift tactics. I could tell there was something she wanted to ask, but she wasn't sure how to ask it.

"What's up," I asked, sitting up on the table and swinging my feet over the side.

She glanced behind her like she expected someone to be there, then sighed. "Well, we kind of have this job tonight and I...well, we...wanted to see if you could give us a hand. Soyeon said you know your way around weapons."

My heart ticked a few beats higher. What were they getting themselves into? "I do. What's the job?"

Her face brightened, but I could tell she was trying not to look too hopeful. "We're delivering a shipment of guns to this club..."

"What club?"

"The Blue Melody."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn't going anywhere near Wings. "When are you leaving?"

"About thirty minutes," she answered, biting her lip again. "We just thought you could give us a hand with backup. Watch our backs while we make the trade. Soojin is a great shot, but she's better as a sniper than close range and Miyeon—"

A crash and a squeal from the other room made us both jerk. Miyeon's voice yelling out "I'm okay" quickly followed.

"Is Miyeon," I finished for her.

"Yeah. She's good at making deals, but she's kind of a disaster sometimes."

I laughed despite my sour mood. "Yeah, I'll help. I'll just need to borrow a couple guns."

Minnie's face brightened. "Oh, I've got plenty! You can take your pick." She hopped up off the chair and quickly disappeared out the door. I poured myself off the table and followed her up the stairs to the apartments they kept for themselves. Minnie's room was small and somewhat cluttered, with designer clothes scattered around on the floor and hanging off the backs of chairs. It was easy to tell where her money went and I was a little jealous of the clothes. I missed the ones Taehyung had bought me.

Thinking of Tae was like a stab to the heart. I leaned against the doorway for a minute until the pain passed. If Minnie noticed the agony on my face, she didn't mention it as she walked to her closet and pulled back a false wall. My mouth dropped to the floor when I saw what she was hiding in the small space.

"Holy shit..."

"I know," she beamed. "I like guns as much as I like clothes."

I rolled off the door frame and walked over to the wall of weapons in a daze. She had everything from guns to swords. There was even a rather impressive collection of throwing stars. I looked over everything almost reverently as she crossed her arms over her chest and smiled like a proud mother.

"Take whatever you think you'll need."

I didn't want to look greedy, so I just grabbed a couple semi-automatic pistols and a short blade that fit in my boot just in case. When I was ready, she grabbed her own stash and started strapping everything down.

"If you want to borrow some clothes, too, feel free. The job won't take long and we usually hang out for a while after. Ilhoon knows how to party."

"Ilhoon?"

"Yeah, it's his club."

I had no idea who Ilhoon was, but I didn't feel like asking any more questions. I just grabbed some black clothes and ducked around the corner to change. A few minutes later I was following Minnie back downstairs.

On one hand, it felt good to be doing something again. There wasn't anything I could do to help Bangtan without information, so I just had to wait until Kai came back with something useable. At least going on a job with the girls, I could be helpful to someone.

And it always felt better to be armed to the teeth with hard steel and sexy clothes. I had missed my duality of femininity and masculinity. It was nice to be able to show it off again.

Once all the girls were ready, they packed Soyeon's and Soojin's cars with the guns and we all piled in. Not wanting to put too much weight in the cars, Minnie and I took her bike. My stomach lurched a little bit as I climbed on the back and wrapped my hands around her as I thought of the last two times I was on a bike with someone and I wondered how long this was going to last. How long would it take for me to move on with my life?

The night was cool and crisp as we rode through empty city streets. I hated that city for all the memories I had of it, and all the memories I didn't have of it. I couldn't stop my mind as it recalled the nights spent shivering and hungry behind Dumpsters or the morning Taehyung found me trying to sneak into his car for a nap. I thought of the men I'd killed that first night when I'd awoken naked and alone...of all the things I'd had to do afterwards just to survive. I knew it wasn't the city's fault, but some part of me still blamed it for all the shit I'd had to go through.

When we finally pulled up in an alley behind the club, I was in a pretty sour mood. I swung my leg off the bike and stepped to the side as a man I assumed was Ilhoon walked up with several others following behind. He was tall and slim as so many in this business seemed to be, but his face was longer, his eyes a little narrower. His mouth turned up at the corners like he spent a lot of time smiling. Altogether, he wasn't a bad looking guy. As soon as he stepped forward, he focused on me.

"Jung Ilhoon," he said with a friendly smile and a bowed head.

"Selene," I replied back.

"Got a last name to go with that?"

"Not one that matters."

Ilhoon straightened and tilted his head back as he sized me up. I kept my face impassive, but didn't drop his stare. I'd at least learned from my guys how to handle a risky situation with a dangerous criminal. After a moment, his face softened and Ilhoon turned to the crates of guns now sitting in the alley.

He motioned towards his men and they stepped forward to open the crates and inspect the goods. The biggest one looked inside for a moment before turning to Ilhoon and nodding his head curtly.

"Fantastic! Ladies, you've outdone yourselves once again. Feel free to join me inside. Drinks are on me."

"And our payment," Soyeon asked, holding out her hands to keep the other girls from moving. I glanced between Ilhoon and Soyeon, watching the power play go down between them. Ilhoon's eyes narrowed just a fraction before his face stretched in a grin.

"Already transferred to your account."

Soyeon tilted her head back and gave Ilhoon a loaded stare. She wasn't one to smile easily, but there under the streetlights with the cold air crystallizing around us, she actually smiled. I didn't say a word as I looked between Soyeon's and Ilhoon's crews. When Ilhoon finally turned back toward the club, I leaned over to Minnie.

"So now what?"

Her face brightened as she laced her fingers with mine. "Now, we party."

Sorry it's taken so long to post this, fam. With the whole world shutting down and the US preparing for the pandemic to hit us like it has everyone else, I've been busy trying to get my kids situated for their online classes and find toilet paper.

So far, I still don't have toilet paper and we're down to our last roll and my body decided to take this opportunity to welcome Aunt Flo. So yeah...self isolation is about to get really interesting. 

On the plus side, with my day job I'm able to work from home so aside from people being giant assholes and hoarding all the groceries, I'm ready to stay in my house for the next foreseeable future. Agoraphobia is in this season, after all.

Please take care of your health, fam. If during your self isolation you start to feel some kind of way, please reach out to me. Our planet has just gotten a lot smaller and for the first time in all of our lifetimes, the entire world is going through something catastrophic together. We have to reach out to each other in a way we never have before. THIS is what social media was made for. So if you need a friend, you've got a friend in me.