01: Moving On

Cold morning air blew across my face and I opened and closed my hands a few times to get my fingers working again. I held them up to my face and blew hot air into them a few times, but it wasn't doing much to help. The advertisements were already starting their top-down shut off sequence, which just served to remind me that I was in the same exact spot this time a year ago.

And I was alone then, too.

I sat on the roof of the old tuna packing warehouse with a set of binos and the Barrett M82 I borrowed from Soyeon. Neither were there because they were necessary, but because of the series of events that had led to me being freezing cold on the roof of a dilapidated building instead of warm in bed with one of my men.

The same series of events that led to them not being my men anymore.

But that didn't mean I wasn't going to still watch out for them. It was my fault all their lives were still in danger and if I couldn't protect them from inside the mansion, I would do everything in my power to protect them from wherever I could.

I waited on that cold roof for another couple hours, but no one showed up. No one had showed up for months and I was starting to wonder if they ever would. I still had yet to find out what all went on in that warehouse, but if no one was going in or out, it just meant that little part of their lives hadn't picked back up yet. My fingers itched to pick up my phone and just call one of them, but I couldn't. I'd promised Jin I wouldn't and as much as it killed me, I'd die before I broke my promise to Jin.

With a sigh, I rolled over onto my back and pushed myself up so I could start packing up my equipment in the long duffle I'd brought with me. Soyeon had been kind enough to lend me the equipment, no questions asked, so I was respectful enough to take care of it. Besides, the scope alone was worth a year's worth of the salary she was paying me.

Throwing the duffle over my back, I carefully climbed down the rusty fire escape. It creaked and whined under my weight. My joints weren't the only ones feeling weak under the strain of winter.

I jumped down from the ladder and started the mile or so hike back to the tiny apartment I'd rented for myself. It was a far cry from the mansion I'd been in just a few months ago, but it was mine and it was relatively safe, so I couldn't complain. I'd dealt with a lot worse.

By the time I made it back to my apartment, I was covered in a thin layer of cold sweat from trying to carrying everything on my own. Even though I'd been working out, it wasn't the same as what Jungkook had put me through on the mats. But then again, I wasn't supposed to think about that because it always led to pain. I missed my Jungkook. I missed all of my men, but Jin had been right to send me away.

I couldn't bear to look at any of them in the eyes that last night. They all knew something was wrong, but neither me or Jin would talk about it. We watched movies and tried to enjoy our time together, but I could barely hold myself together. By sunrise the next morning, I was gone. I tried to make the break as easily as I could to spare them a long, drawn out, goodbye.

I grunted at my own internal dialog. Who was I kidding? I was saving myself the pain of having to tell them anything. And I wasn't even sure if it had been worth it because I found myself wishing more than once that I could've had one more chance to kiss them and tell them how I really felt. Even though to do that might have opened doors that didn't need opening.

Hanging on my door was a small white note, folded in half and taped up with a tiny piece of silver duct tape. I held my bags a little tighter and glanced up and down the hallway, but there wasn't a soul in either direction. Biting my lip, I ripped the note down and unlocked my door. Once it was locked tight behind me, I leaned against it and opened the note.

Tonight at 11. The usual.

The handwriting was the usual barely legible scrawl I'd come to recognize over my past few months of isolation. He was the only constant from my old life and I leaned my head against my door with a relieved sigh. If he'd been here, then everything was still okay. It was the most I could have hoped for.

Leaving the bags by the door so I wouldn't forget to take them back to Soyeon, I moved around the kitchen without much of a thought. I warmed up some rice and fixed a glass of water, not thinking about the meals I used to be able to eat for breakfast around a table filled with warm voices and laughter, and sat down on my threadbare couch in front of my ancient television. The news was uneventful, just like I'd expected. None of the warnings I'd learned to look for of random warehouse explosions or pileups on the freeway, which meant I was free to sleep in peace. It was going to be a long night at the shop, so I was grateful at least for small miracles.

Sleep came easy, but it wasn't restful. Nightmares invariably came for me of dark eyes and even darker hair. Of family turned enemies coming to rob me of every happy thought I'd ever had. Before the sun had disappeared into the stacks, I was already awake and trembling in the fetal position under my covers.

It was going to be a long night.

~~

"Selene, your regular is here." Minnie's voice carried down the dark hallway to my booth in the back. I flipped the reader in my hands off and tossed it onto the counter with a clack. I could hear Gina's shoes tapping on the floor before she threw the door open and sauntered inside.

"I'm never going to get used to that name," she said, flopping down into my chair. With a yawn, I started setting out my equipment.

"You try coming up with a new fake name every few months and see what good ones you come up with."

She flashed a toothy smile up at me that was somewhere between friendly and confrontational. "I did. I just didn't blow my cover so quickly. Do I look like a Gina to you?"

I lifted an eyebrow as I gave her a quick once-over. She was wearing her trademark tight, low-cut black tank top, a pair of skin-tight silver pants, and black combat boots that laced halfway up her shins. The only thing that didn't look like every other time I'd seen her was her hair that she'd only recently dyed back to black.

Her smile fell as she saw my look, only to be replaced by a tight-lipped smirk. "Whatever. The point is, I kept my identity a secret. Picking new names sucks."

"Yeah," I agreed with a sigh. "It does." I propped my knee up on the rung of my stool and leaned over her a little. "So what are you getting this time?"

Gina slipped her arm out of her tank top and bra strap then pointed to the hollow of her shoulder by her collar bone. "I want the phases of the moon right here." She pulled up a picture on her phone and showed me. "Think you can do that?"

I looked over the picture. It was simple enough. I'd started at Soyeon's shop just as a cleaner and evening security, but we'd all been surprised to learn that I wasn't bad with a tattoo gun. After a couple months, Soyeon gave me a bigger paycheck and my own booth. I still wasn't doing anything huge or intricate, but Gina was pretty much my only client and she came in more to give me intel than she did to get tattoos.

"I can manage that. Lie back."

She sat her phone down on her thigh and did as she was told. We had got off to a bad start when I'd been working at the club, but after everything with Bangtan and the Baron had gone down, she realized that I wasn't just some disposable sex toy for the boys. When I ran into her one night downtown, we got to talking and realized we had more in common than we'd first thought. So every couple of weeks, she'd come in to fill me in on what was going on around the club. I think she probably knew that there was something more to me and the guys than a working relationship, but neither one of us brought it up.

"Hobi just hired a new bartender for the upstairs bar and I hate her already," Gina said, wincing as I started in on her skin.

I chuckled softly. "What else is new? You hate everyone."

"Yeah, but I really hate this bitch. She's the cousin of the whore that's been dealing to Jimin. Han Se – aaaahhhh don't push so damn hard!"

"Sorry," I grumbled. I hated that dealer bitch almost as bad as I hated AT3.

Gina cast me an angry glare, but settled back into her gossip. "Anyway, the stupid bitch 'broke' three bottles of our best whiskey...or so she said. I think she's stealing. But Joon says we're too tight-staffed right now and have to deal." She rolled her eyes dramatically. "Are you sure you can't come back?"

"Now I know she must be bad if you're begging for me to come back."

"She really is."

"What about the rest of the guys," I asked, easily redirecting her from a question I couldn't possibly answer.

She shrugged with the shoulder I wasn't pinning down. "Most of the guys are good. I think Jimin's been using more than usual because he seems a little...I don't know...off? And Joon's sleeping at the office now."

I pulled the gun away from her skin and stared down at her. "Why?"

"Beats me. But word is something went down between him and Jin. They don't talk. Like, at all. It's awkward when they're in the same room together and everyone is just kind of waiting for one of them to blow up."

"That's awful," I murmured, getting back to work to try and calm my suddenly racing heart. What could possibly be going on between those two?

"Yeah. I mean, Jin doesn't really talk to anyone anyway, but it's super uncomfortable. But everyone else seems to be okay. I mean, Jungkook even started bringing a girl around the club lately. I think they're dating from all the petting they do, but it could just be a friends with benefits kind of thing."

My heart literally stopped in my chest for a second before sputtering back to life. It took everything in my power not to stab her in the throat with my needle. Of course, she had no way of knowing what Jungkook was to me or why such information could cause me such visceral pain, so I had to be careful to school my expression. I swallowed hard and continued with her tattoo as she prattled on, trying to focus on what I was doing rather than the indescribable pain as my heart felt like it was being ripped out through my throat.

My Jungkook had already moved on. How long before the rest of them did?

What's up, my bitches? 

Was that too much? Okay, I'm sorry.

But I'M BACK! I promised I would be and here I am. Your wrinkly old potato is back at it. I hope you love this story as much as the first. As always, expect cussing and violence and smut because that's the only thing I know how to write. Can't teach an old potato new tricks and all.

If you enjoy what you read, please tell me with likes, votes, and LOTS of comments. The comments are my favorite. And feel free to share the link with anyone else you think might like it - just make sure they read the first book before this one because otherwise they're going to be soooo lost!

Thanks lovlies! ILY

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