the comments guys. WHERE DID THEY GO. i rapid update and all i ask for is comments. come oooon silent readers i wanna remember who you are :(

and, if i do the live-stream of one of the chapters of HR108, what time of day would you guys prefer? i live in new jersey, so my timezone is US eastern.

chapter thirty

N.J.H

"When are we going to Louis'?"

"Five; he wants everyone there at six, but we're going early."

"Why?"

"Because I'm his best friend and it's his birthday."

Harry tugs his ugly sweater over his head and smooths out his hair,

"Listen," he says, cradling my cheek in his hand, "I don't know what's gonna happen tonight, but--"

"Stay safe," I repeat Harry's continuous warnings, "Harry, that was a situation that was dangerous. I don't think it's typical for me to be in any of those."

"I..." he sighs and runs a hand down his face, "I just want you to be safe Niall, I don't know how I'd feel if you were to get hurt."

"Harry..." I tip my chin up and kiss his lips softly, "I'll be alright. Your worrying is only driving you mad. I'm flattered, but please, for your own good..."

"Uh," he says, taking out his phone, "shouldn't we get going? It's 5:15."

"Wait, what?!" I say frantically trying to find my sweatshirt, "I thought it was 4:15!"

"I may need to fix that clock..." Harry mutters, tapping at the wall clock. I roll my eyes and grab his wrist, dragging him out of his house. I had no idea it was so late.

"Come on come on!" I say, pushing him into the driver's seat before I rush over to the passenger side, "God he's gonna kill me!"

"Okay okay babe we're going," Harry revs the engine and we pull out of his driveway quickly, speeding away from the house that is slowly becoming ours.

Last night (or this morning) has Harry on high alert. Though it hasn't been long since I almost got shot at a club in Manhattan, he seems to have gone insane. Constantly checking up on me, tending to the one bruise on my cheek, I mean, I know he's doing it because he cares. Though, at some point, enough is enough.

"Harry?"

"Niall?"

"I need you to stop fawning over me so much; I'm okay. You can't seem to understand that."

"I'm sorry," he says again, "I just want--"

"Not again," I stop him, "you said that five minutes ago."

"Only because it's true!" Harry protests, "God Niall do you know what I would do if I lost you?"

"What Harry?" I challenge.

"Nothing. You're my everything." His voice falters as the words leave his lips and a bit of guilt begins to sink in.

"How can I be your everything in a matter of three months?"

"Who's idea was it to put a time limit of feelings?" he asks, "Why do I need to choose a doable time to tell you that I love you?"

"Because it seems rushed if you just come out with it!"

Silence unfolds.

"You know," Harry says after awhile, "it seems like every day is the same."

"How?" I ask him, already tired of the relentless arguing.

"I say 'I love you' and you say it too, but I know our feelings aren't on the same level."

"Harry," I explain, once again, "I've said this before; I can't love as quickly as you. You were obviously raised to love without caution. I can't do that. Do you see what's happening with Tiffany? Harry believe it or not I loved that girl and I gave her everything only to see her with another man's dick in her mouth. I don't know how you expect me to do that all over again all carefree. Don't you understand? I don't want to get hurt, and I'm sorry, but that's what love does to us."

"But what is love if it's all rainbows and unicorns?" he starts again, "Who ever said that easy love is the best love? You're going to have a stronger love if you get through all the shit together. It takes a lot of trust and a lot of vulnerability in order to have a true love with someone. I'm sorry baby, but it can't work any other way."

He stops the car in front of Louis' driveway, the headlights dimming as he looks at me. Even in the deep darkness I can see every feature of his alluring face. His green eyes shine through all the blackness that surrounds us as he caresses my bruised cheek,

"So either we're in this together,"

He looks at the house we're to enter before turning back to me,

"Or I can drive away at the end of tonight without you. You've gotta trust me, and I promise you, holding that trust will be an honor for me."

I sigh and gulp back my tears, looking back up at my boyfriend,

"Together. Always together."

He nods and presses a lingering kiss on my forehead.

"I love you."

"I know."

We draw away, opening both of the doors and stepping into the cold snowy winter air. The fact that I can be outside in the winter without getting severely sick makes me extremely happy. I've been spending a lot more time outside rather than inside (unless it's cuddling and/or sex with Harry).

"My step-brother did you some good, didn't he?" Harry asks as he admires me loving winter while wrapping his arm around my waist,

"Yes, loving it." I smile, "The snow feels nice on my cheeks."

"That's my Niall," he says sweetly before knocking on the door. Louis opens the door, a huge smile on his face,

"Hey guys! Niall, thank god the bruising is going down. I'm sorry still..."

"You and Harry," I sigh, "Guys! I'm alive and breathing!"

Louis laughs a little and nods, walking away towards his boyfriend. I begin to follow, walking in the direction to the stairs leading to the man cave, until I feel a sharp slap on my ass.

"Fuck!" I squeal, looking over to Harry, "The hell Harry?"

"I don't like your tone," Harry teases me with his classic wink.

"Whatever Mom," I taunt back. He rolls his eyes and reaches over to pull me into his chest.

"No no!" I flail away from him, "You're being an arse!"

"A lovable arse," he kisses me all over my face and neck before lightly pushing me away. I flip him off and he blows me a kiss.

"HATE YOU!" I shout.

"LOVE YOU MORE!" he screams back. I blush, biting my lip as he leads me downstairs, away from the main foyer. Once we get there, we're greeting by two others; Zayn, and Liam.

"Liam!" I exclaim, reaching over to hug him tight, "God where have you been! No calls? No texts? Dude it's been months!"

"I'm sorry!" Liam apologizes for his absence, "You know me, busy as hell with being unsocial."

"Oh shut up," I shove him aside and greet Zayn quickly. We all sit down around the table filled with Christmas cookies, beer, and champagne.

"I got the champagne for the lover squad over there," Louis points at us with two of his fingers, narrowing his eyes. Harry and I both laugh, picking up a bottle without any shame.

"Thank you," I say cheekily to Louis, "we love it."

"Oh," Harry holds his hand out to Liam, "I'm Harry, nice to meet you."

"You too," Liam replies, "I was waiting to get an introduction."

"Guys," Louis smirks, "It's my birthday."

"We know!" We all say at once.

"Whatever!" he shouts, "None of you got me presents!"

"You spoiled brat," I joke, waving the bottle at him, "we should be enough present for you."

"I know what's enough present for me," Louis looks up, glaring at Zayn, "but I'm not getting it so screw it, I'm getting high."

Louis pulls a plastic bag from under the couch and my eyes widen. Louis is really stocking up on the weed; more than I expected.

"Not now," Zayn drapes his arm around my friend, "later, when it'll hit us harder."

"Yeah, when it'll hit you harder." I pipe up, "I don't do that."

"Neither do I," Harry takes my side, "I will stay aware, thank you."

"Suit yourself," Zayn says, "more for Lou Liam and I."

•

"My phone is literally broken now! What the hell Liam!"

"I'm sorry!" he giggles, holding my now shattered phone with two of his fingers, "I had no idea that was going to happen!"

What happened was we were playing music and Liam's favorite song came on. In the excitement of the song, he squealed, and kicked his feet in the air. This caused my phone to catapult into the air from where I was previously holding it and slam against a wall. My heart broke in three when my phone screen shattered on impact.

"I don't think I can forgive you," I say, cradling my second love in my hand, "you may have to die for this."

"Niall, just fix it." Louis chuckles, "It's Christmas, have Harry get you a new one as a present."

I press the lock button, upset as the jagged screen is the only thing I see.

"Harry?"

"Yes baby?"

He takes his pink lips off of the champagne bottle and gives me his full attention,

"I'm gonna need that bottle."

He hands me the bottle and I take a long sip, feeling the slight burn down my throat. Other than Liam murdering my child, the night has been pretty uneventful. It's 11:50 and we're all just waiting for Louis' birthday to be over and Christmas to begin.

"Hey Lou!" Liam calls out from the back of the room, where he's calling in a pizza, "What should I say to him?"

"Tell him we're looking for pizzas, and high quality. Or else he gets zero pay!" he shouts back.

The three of them are participating in last minute shenanigans, while Harry and I sit calmly in the loveseat, me on his lap. His hand rests on my back, and my fingers are curled into his hair.

"You're so pretty," I whisper, kissing his head.

"You're prettier," he whispers back, picking up my hand and kissing it. I smile as his lips leave my skin ever slowly, my state of mind falling into a bliss. It's little moments like these that make me feel like I'm walking on clouds.

"I love you," Harry reminds me.

"I'm very fond of you too." I say with a smirk.

"Fond is a synonym for love," he informs me.

"Nerd." I snort.

"Your nerd." he says back.

"Why do you keep doing that?!" I scold him, slapping his arm, "You're such a cheesy fuck! Guys he's such a cheesy fuck!"

"I'm not cheesy!" he proclaims, "Stop telling these people lies!"

Liam smiles at us and clasps his hands together,

"I swear to god, you two are the cutest couple since...whichever couple has been considered cute."

"Thanks Liam." I grin, shaking my head because god, what are we gonna do with him? He's too hilariously cute to hate, even when he shatters your phone.

"Guys!" Zayn shouts, holding Louis tighter to his body, "It's 11:59!"

We all unlock our phones, looking at the time. To pass the time, we all talk about what to do tomorrow. Louis wants to sit inside and watch movies and eat cookies while drinking tea, and we're all not opposed to that.

Christmas Eve would have ended soundlessly, but it wasn't meant to be that way. When we hear the first bang upstairs, confusion arises between the five of us.

"What was that?" I say, getting up from Harry's lap.

"Nuh-uh," he grabs my arm, "Niall don't go up there."

"Harry..." I give him a warning glare, and he releases his protective grasp.

"Louis!"

The four of us look to my friend, and he looks back at us with the same worried expression.

"What's going on?" Zayn asks him.

"I don't know..." Louis says quietly. There's three more bangs before a loud crash rings in our ears.

"LOUIS!"

He's inside the house. I look at the clock, and see midnight has struck.

"LOUIS I'M FUCKING COMING FOR YOU!"

I look at Louis with wide eyes, the two of us recognizing that voice almost immediately. The one voice Louis swore to never hear again no matter how much it took to stay away;

Stan is here.

not the stan that is louis' best friend irl. i made up another stan :)