WHEN MY EYES opened to bright white lights, I assumed I was in heaven. I figured I'd bled out in the police station and died, never seeing Isaac again. I at first panicked about the thought of never seeing Isaac again, before I calmed down.

How bad could dying be?

I wouldn't mind not having to be so scared all the time. I wouldn't have to lie to Joey, I wouldn't have to deal with him being pissed off at me. I wouldn't have to go to work and feel violated. I wouldn't have nightmares about my dad and Camden. I wouldn't stress about how I felt about Derek. I wouldn't worry about my future or Isaac's.

Then I wondered why Heaven was so damn annoying.

An incessant beeping irritated my ears, falling in sync with my heartbeat. The pain in my leg wasn't as bad anymore, now just a dull throb that matched the one in my head. Whatever I was laying on was uncomfortable, along with my clothes.

This time, when I opened my eyes, I wasn't in Heaven. I was in a hospital, complete with the gown and monitor. My eyes swept over the room, and I spotted Isaac sitting in a chair against the wall. His head was angled downwards as it rested in his hands, elbows on his knees.

Just seeing him brought a rush of relief over me, the monitor beside me picking up just like my heartbeat. Isaac's head shot up at the noise, his blue eyes meeting mine. I blinked and he was in front of me, wrapping his arms around me. I let out a sharp breath as I hugged him back, squeezing my eyes shut.

"I'm sorry," I said softly, voice raspy. I felt Isaac shake his head.

"Don't apologise. Please don't apologise."

Neither of us said anything else as we just clung onto each other. I think we were both terrified. I had a billion questions rattling around in my head, such as how the rest of the full moon went for the betas and what happened with Matt. Not to mention the worry I felt that someone else might have got hurt.

"Is everyone okay?" I finally asked. Isaac sighed as he pulled away.

"Everyone but Matt," he responded. I bit my lip before nodding.

"What happened?"

"Gerard Argent killed him. Drowned him in a river," Isaac responded quietly. I felt a tug at my heart strings, bowing my head.

"That's awful," I muttered.

"He was a killer, Julia, he shot you for God's sake," Isaac sounded frustrated.

"He was still just a boy. He didn't deserve to die like that, especially after what happened when he was little," I shrugged, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. A knock at the door interrupted us before Isaac could argue back.

He glanced at me before going over and opening the door. I inhaled sharply at who I saw, my heart skipping a beat.

"I'll give you guys a minute," Isaac muttered before brushing past him and out the door.

Joey stepped fully into the room, revealing two bags in his hands. My face fell as I recognized them to be mine. He awkwardly dropped them on the floor beside my bed before he walked closer to me, giving me a blank look. He looked good, dressed in a pair of jeans and a flannel.

"Will you live?" He asked, his voice irritated. I gulped before nodding. I could cut the awkward tension with a knife.

"Looks like it. It'll heal," I said. I nervously played with my hands. I didn't like the look Joey was giving me.

"You've been lying to me for a while now," He spoke calmly, "I can't handle it. You have this new group of friends out of nowhere, they're not even in our grade. I don't get why you're so far up their asses. You lied about what happened in detention, then you vanished on your birthday, and now you're in the hospital because you were shot."

It was silent for a moment as I absorbed his words. Tears welled up in my eyes, not falling.

"I'm sorry. I know it looks crazy, but I swear to God I'd tell you if I could. I want to, so badly, but it's not safe for you," I said honestly.

"I don't even know you anymore," Joey blurted out, now a little more angry, "You've changed. I look at you, and-and it's like I'm talking to a stranger. I can't let a stranger stay with me anymore."

I nodded understandingly, looking at him with desperation, "It's okay. You did more than you had to and I'm grateful. I'll find somewhere else to stay, but please. . ." I trailed off. I didn't know how to beg him not to leave me. I felt like he was breaking up with me, and we weren't even dating.

"I can't do this anymore, Julia," Joey finally said the words I never wanted to hear from him, "I can't keep listening to you lying and I can't be around you. You never have time for me. You're too busy with Isaac and his friends. Since when have you spent all your time with your brother of all people?"

"I'm a sister before I'm your friend, Joey," I said gently. It was the truth. Isaac would always be my number one above all others.

"That's not fair!" He shouted abruptly, "I deserve the time of day too. You probably don't even realize how big of a bitch you're being right now."

I was left speechless. There was nothing I could say. I wanted to say so many things. I wanted to jump up and scream, not just at him but at everybody. Instead, I just sat there, holding it all in.

"Maybe when you pull your head out of your ass, or this all goes away, we can be friends again," Joey said. I slowly dragged my eyes over to meet him, clenching my jaw.

"Okay," I managed to get out of my mouth with an overly sarcastic scoff, "I guess it was fun while it lasted."

"I love you, J," he said softly. I suppressed an eye roll.

"If you loved me you'd understand that I'm trying to protect you and stay my friend," I said lowly.

There were so many other things I could've said, but I managed to keep it short.

"Please, if we're not friends anymore and I'm such a bitch, get the hell out of here," my voice held both a fragility and a sterness, Joey staring at me with a look of understanding.

"Goodbye, Julia."

Once again I chose silence over composing a response, watching his back as he retreated out of the room. I got the sudden urge to break something, smash it into a billion little pieces. I wanted to punch somebody and hurt them. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs until I couldn't breath anymore.

All those thoughts drifted away when the door opened, this time to Derek Hale. I didn't know what to say. I just stared at him as I forced away the tears Joey had caused. Derek tucked his hands away into his pockets as he walked over, looking at me with traces of concern.

"Your room at the loft is still yours if you want it," he said in a light voice. I nodded twice.

"Thanks," I whispered.

"I missed your cooking, anyways," Derek shrugged, lightening the mood, "Isaac wanted Mexican take out every night."

"Isaac does love Mexican," I hummed.

"Are you okay?" He switched topics. I paused for a second, thinking over my answer.

"I will be."

* * * * *

I was already annoyed with the stupid crutch they gave me. It was so I wouldn't put too much pressure on my bad leg. It was easier to just hop on one foot than to try and fuck around with the crutch. It'd only been a day with it, and I had already given up on it.

"It's suppose to help you so you don't look like a rabbit hopping around everywhere," Isaac said from where he leaned against the counter. I was preparing dinner, currently hopping back from the fridge with beef in my hands.

"I'd rather be a rabbit than use that damned thing," I sent an ugly look towards said crutch. It was on the floor a few feet away where I'd thrown it with a groan and switched over to hopping. The stupid thing slid too much on the hard floor and hurt my shoulder.

"You're not gonna be able to work if you're hopping everywhere," he said. I shrugged as I began cutting up the beef into smaller pieces.

"I'm on kitchen and dishes duty," I said smugly.

"When one of your stitches pop out, you're not aloud to complain," Isaac finalized, crossing his arms. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Shush," I insisted, "Help me out and start browning this beef."

Isaac listened and worked on the beef while I got out everything else I needed to make spaghetti. I was too tired to make sauce from scratch and decided to just add to the sause from a jar.

With Isaac's help, it didn't take long for dinner to be ready and soon we were sat at the table, eating. It was definitely silent, but I couldn't tell if it was awkward or not. I also didn't really care. 

It was still quiet once we finished and I wordlessly began washing the dishes. I felt like getting it done now and then going to bed.

"I heard you're going back to work tomorrow?" Derek appeared at my side, just like he always seems to. I glanced over at him with a blank expression.

"Yeah," I said dully.

"Are you ready to?" He crossed his arms and leaned against the counter beside me. I avoided his face and focused on my hands as they cleaned the dishes.

"It doesn't matter," I said softly, "I need the money and the pay's pretty good."

"I think you should take at least another day off."

"Goodnight," I sent him a tight and forced smile before I stumbled past him, making sure not to put too much pressure on my bad leg.

Truth be told, I didn't wanna go to work the next day. I didn't wanna do fucking anything.

* * * * *

Olivia gave me an innocent smile as she set a stack of plates beside the sink where I was stood, all of my weight on one foot, "Have fun cleaning this shit off."

Her pony tail swooshed to the side as she turned on her heel, walking away. My fists clenched from inside the soapy water, my eyes momentarily closing in annoyance. I didn't even know what Olivia's deal was, she just hated me.

Nonetheless, scraping the chocolate remains off wasn't terribly difficult, just obnoxious. So far my day back had gone exactly how I expected it to; terribly. Everyone knew that washing dishes was the worst part of the job. You had to get it done quickly because Chuck was cheep and didn't have a surplus of dishes and utensils, and to make matters worse the place was packed. It always was during break.

"Want me to take over for a little bit?" Richie asked as he walked over, a stain on his shirt briefly catching my eye.

"No, you've got your own work to do," I shook my head.

"Dustin can take over," he gestured his fat thumb over his shoulder. I grimaced as I looked over at the old man, his eyes shut and his head hung, giving off the impression he was either sleeping or dead. The latter was more believable, to be honest.

"Don't worry about me, I've got it covered," I shooed him with a flicking of my wrists.

"Just holler if you don't," he nodded before stalking away. I sighed under my breath as I turned back to the sink, moving on to the frying pan I had been scrubbing at. I nearly groaned as I heard footsteps again, rolling my eyes.

"Awe, you poor baby," I tensed at the voice as hands wrapped around my waist, a familiar body pressed against my back, "I'm so sorry you're hurt," Chuck cooed, "Who hurt you, baby?"

"Stop," I said lowly as I felt his hands starting to curl under my skirt.

"What'd you say, sweet cheeks?" His lips dragged along my neck over my hair. I clenched my hand around the frying pan as disgust flowed through my blood.

His touch reminded me of every time he'd touched me when I made it clear I didn't want him to. I remembered crying to my father once, begging for him to just let me get a different job. I remembered him telling me he'd worked hard to get me that job so young.

Then I realized my father was dead. I felt like I was reliving everything that'd happened since he died--even before that! This feeling of pure rage came over me, worse than it'd ever been before.

"I said stop!" I shouted before I elbowed him back, turning to face him and swinging the frying pan all at the same time. Even my hands hurt from how hard it collided with his face.

Chuck fell to the floor along with the frying pan as I messily disregarded it. It felt good to hit him, but I wasn't finished. I wanted him to know how much he'd hurt me.

And so, I ignored the pain in my leg as I straddled him, one of my hands balling around the neck of his shirt and the other slamming down at his face rapidly. I never wanted to stop, not until he was dead.

I didn't even consider my actions as I beat him bloody. I beat him until he stopped complaining and my knuckles were ripped raw. I still didn't stop.

Only when I was yanked off of him did my fist stop it's assault on his face. I could feel the original rush of everything that'd happened dwindling, and I was left breathing harshly as I stared at Chuck where he lied on the floor, his face barely recognized. He was gurgling his own blood slightly, hands shaking on the ground beside him.

"I-I'll have y-you thrown in-in j-jail," he grunted, rage evident.

"Keep yapping, Chuck," Olivia sneered. I didn't even realize it was her who'd pulled me off of him and left her arm wrapped around me, "Who'd win in court, hmm? Creepy old rapist or teenage girl who finally stood up to you?"

I was speechless. I had not a single clue what to say. Olivia had never even remotely stood up for me, if anything she was a total bitch to me. I could hardly grasp the concept that I'd beaten Chuck half to death for crying out loud.

"Y-You're fired!" He raised his voice the best he could, still laying on the ground.

"Wrong again," Olivia smirked down at him, "Because we quit."

"All three of us," Richie stepped forward with a his arms crossed, glare fixated on Chuck. Olivia squeezed my arm slowly letting go.

"Let's get the fuck out of this shithole."

I allowed her to wrap an arm around my shoulder and lead me out of there, only stopping for a moment to grab our bags before we exited the place. My leg hurt from exerting myself and I had to use the fucking crutch.

"I'm proud, kid," Richie said as he fell into step with us, "of both of ya."

I still said nothing. I couldn't find any words to say. I felt dangerous and I didn't know if I liked it or not.

"I'd better head home and tell the misses, y'all gonna be alright?" Richie approached his motorcycle.

"I'll make sure she gets home," Olivia assured. I was so confused on why she was being nice to me. Either way I followed her to a small blue car with a dent on the side passenger door.

I was hesitant to get in, but still did. Derek had driven me there and I really didn't feel like crutching all the way home. Olivia silently got in the driver's side, shutting the door and starting the car yet making no move to actually leave the parking lot.

"Why are you being nice to me?" I finally spoke up, my eyes cast downwards to stare at my bloody hand.

Olivia didn't answer right away. I feared for a second that she'd finally lash out or stay silent, making everything ten times more awkward. Finally, she spoke in a soft tone.

"Chuck is a dick. Everybody knows it. My mom was working there alongside him when they were in highschool together. Back when he was a decent guy."

I lifted my head and looked at her profile. I never knew her mom was “friends” with Chuck.

"Then she went off and met my dad while he focused on Hittos. Once I was born and old enough, my mom instantly suggested working there because she knew the manager.

"It was fine for a while. Then he started to get handsy and all perverted. I'm sure the same thing happened to you. Anyways, I told my mom right away. I told her he touched me and I wanted to quit."

Olivia turned her head to look at me, her eyes glossy, "She didn't believe me. She said she knew Chuck better than anyone--that he'd never do that to anyone. ‘He's a good guy, he has a huge heart’.

"My own mother didn't believe me when I told her I was sexually assaulted. I just kept working there and I constantly felt like I was his bitch or something. I felt like I was just this kid surrounded by all these scary people.

"Then you came along. I suddenly was off the hook. Somehow I just knew he was doing it to you instead. I knew he was hurting you but you never did anything. It pissed me off so much. It was like you had every opportunity to get the fuck out of there yet you stayed.

"I was forced to stay there and you just stayed for no reason. You had so many other job offers you could've had yet you kept putting up with his shit. You stayed even when I treated you fucking terribly!"

Olivia paused for a moment, a quiet sob echoing in the small car. I sighed slightly before leaning over the console to pull the older girl into my arms. She shakily hugged back, her face nuzzling into my neck.

"I'm so sorry, Julia," she cried out, "You never deserved that. I'm so sorry."

"Hey," I whispered, smoothing out the hair on the back of her head as my other arm held her tighter, "It's okay. I'm fine. You don't have to blame yourself for how all the shit that happened to you effected you."

"How can you just forgive me?" Olivia asked as she pulled away from me. Her face was pink and scrunched up slightly, tears still streaming down her face.

"I don't think you're a bad person, Olivia. You might not have treated me the best, but at least you've apologized. It's better than nothing and it's more than I'd ever even ask for."

"Thank you, Julia. I promise I'll make it up to you somehow."

* * * * *

I was back to feeling numb as I approached Derek's loft. Olivia had dropped me off. My hands were shaking by my side, dripping blood from where they'd been ripped open. They hurt badly, giving off the impression that at least one of them were broken. I'd broken them before, thus I knew roughly what it felt like.

Now that I was by myself and in the silence, even for a few moments, I found myself rethinking everything that'd happened since Derek dropped me off at Hittos. Actually, I was thinking about everything.

I was so conflicted with my emotions. I didn't know how to feel about anything. This left me feeling nothing but anxious.

I was on the verge of tears as I hobbled into the loft, my head hung and my eyes staring at my hands. My bloody hands.

"Hey, I thought you didn't get off work until 5," Derek called out from the kitchen. He wasn't facing me. I remained silent and made a beeline for the stairs. Derek suddenly whipped around, his eyes staring at me with his brows furrowed, "Are you hurt? I smell blood."

I still didn't know what to say. I was so fucking frustrated with myself. It felt like there was nothing right to say. What was I supposed to tell him? Derek didn't even care about me.

However, he was by my side in an instant. He gently took my bag off my shoulder and placed it on the floor, moving to stand in front of me. One of Derek's hands cupped my face as he bent down to meet my eyes from where they were aimed at the floor.

"Julia? What happened?"

My throat felt clogged as I took an unsteady step backwards, his hand falling.

"I almost killed my boss," I blurted out. A single tear raced down my left cheek, though I wasn't sure if I was sad or not about my act of aggression.

"What do you mean?" Derek asked, taking another step closer to me. I was so caught up in all my thoughts of what Chuck had done to me that I didn't feel comfortable being so close to Derek. I took another step back.

I didn't realize how hard my hands were shaking until I lifted them for him to see, the crimson color looking more dull in the lighting.

"I hit him. I-I hit him a lot."

Derek had an unreadable expression on his face as he stared at me, "Julia, what happened?"

"He touched me," I whispered, more tears caressing my cheeks. I shook my head, running my aching hands roughly across my face before situating them in my hair. I didn't care about the blood that'd stain my blonde locks, "I always said no and he never listened. I-I tried to fight back buh-but he's so strong!"

My chest was heaving with my sobs, my words difficult to make out, "He never stopped! He didn't care what I wanted or what I said!"

I felt myself falling forward, about to collapse to my knees on the hard floor. Derek's arms swiftly caught me, holding me tight against him. I sobbed into his chest, my eyes squeezed shut.

"I hate him, Derek," I mumbled, "But I hate myself more for not doing anything about it."

"I'll kill him," Derek said in a low voice, "I swear to God, I'll kill him."

"I just want to go to bed, Derek," I whispered, choking back anymore cries.

"Can I please take care of your hand first?" He gently ran his hands through my hair, undoing the knots in it.

I meekly nodded. I didn't protest when he picked me up like a baby, my body curling towards him as my head rested on his shoulder. I let my eyes close as he carried me up the stairs.

"I've got her," he muttered, I'm assuming to Isaac. I didn't bother opening my eyes. I didn't want to see the look on his face. He was probably going to cry. I didn't want to see my brother cry.

I finally opened my eyes as Derek set me down on the edge of the bathtub. I watched as he grabbed a few things before turning back to me. He gently grabbed my hand, simply holding it for a second. I was shocked when the pain slowly left my hand, and even my leg. The tension in my head was disappearing by the second, all while the veins in his hand and arm turned dark and black.

My eyes flicked up to meet his.

"How'd you do that?" I asked quietly.

"All werewolves can."

I simply looked back down at his hand as the veins returned to normal. He released my hand to grab a wet clothe and wipe the blood off. I wasn't surprised at how bruised and torn up my knuckles were. They looked worse than they felt--or, well, did feel.

Derek applied some disinfectant and then a bandage, finishing it off by wrapping my fingers together with gauze. Once he was finished, we sat in silence. My eyes were staring down at my hand, but I felt his gaze on my face.

It reminded me of when Isaac accidentally hurt me and Derek helped me. It felt like we'd come so far since then, yet it also felt like yesterday.

But it couldn't have been yesterday because yesterday I was released from the hospital after I was shot.

"I'm tired," I whispered. I didn't care that it wasn't even lunch yet. I was exhausted. Christ, all I ever felt was exhaustion anymore.

"Okay," Derek whispered back. He easily scooped me back into his arms and carried me out of the bathroom, carefully not to hit my feet off the doorframe. He took me all the way to my room where he set me on my bed. I curled up slightly, pulling off my shoes and setting them beside my bed. Next I took off my jacket and set it down as well.

Finally, I was able to lay down and pull my blankets over me. I turned away from Derek. I immediately locked eyes with Isaac from where he stood in the doorway. Just as I suspected, his eyes were dampened by unshed tears. His shoulders sagged and he had a prominent frown on his face.

"Get some sleep. I'll be here when you wake up," Derek assured, rubbing up and down on my arm before he stood up and approached the door. I turned the opposite way so that I was facing away from the boys, closing my eyes as I spoke my next words.

"I don't wanna wake up."

a/n

😳😳😳

here you go babies hope you liked it. a lot happened this chapter.

joey said

olivia said

& julia said

anyways i love you all & see you next time! 💞💝💗💖💕💓💞💝💗💖💕💓💞💝💗💖💕💓