[Y/n] had been feeling terrible the entire day, doing nothing but lay down in her bed in misery. She had no clue as to why she felt the way she did, but it did make her worried. She hadn't felt this kind of despair and dread before. She had guessed that it had something to do with her friends, because she somehow could feel her friends' emotions even from miles apart. But she already had texted her friends, nobody seemed to have something wrong with them.

She was currently laying on her side in her bed. Her body, made as small as she could tightly holding a pillow, covered by her duvet. Adjusting her position slightly the muscles in her face forming a determined look. Taking a deep breath she struggled to quickly rip the duvet off her, when it was finally was of her she pushed herself in a sitting position at the side of the bed. 

Sitting there in silence for a moment, slightly doubting her own actions she shakes her head. Stubborn to get rid of the pathetic feeling she stands up, throwing the pillow she was holding back unto the bed. Quickly grabbing her phone and disconnecting the charger she storms out of her bedroom.

It was about one in the afternoon and her body was still covered up by her pajamas, as she had previously not seen any purpose in getting dressed. The windows that she passes in the hallway still shielded by their curtains as she storms past.  ''This is absolute nonsense,'' [y/n] starts muttering to herself. ''I refuse to lay in bed all day long because of this gut feeling,'' the words filled with irritation leave her lips as she angrily goes down the stairs. 

In her anger, she falls down the last few steps. Dropping her phone she quickly grabs hold of the railing. Or that is what she tried. As her hand reaches for the railing her body is already making its way down the stairs, making her hand just out of reach from safety. Laying down with her head facing the ceiling she lets out a frustrated groan, laying still for a couple of more seconds while getting used to the newfound pain in her back.

Picking herself off the floor and retrieving her phone she sighs once more, her shoulders hanging lower and a defeated expression on her face ''Today is not my day''. Shaking her head lightly she tries to get those thoughts out of her head. ''No. Enough with the self-loathing. You are going to make yourself a cup of [preferred hot beverage] and do something productive for once'' she gives herself a quick pep talk as the determined look comes back to her features.

Opening the kitchen door a bit too harshly the door makes its way back into her face. This time luck was a bit more at her side, as she was able to grab the door firmly before it could make contact with her skin. Pushing the door away from her [a bit more controlled this time] she walks into her kitchen. Letting her small device glide from her hand unto the kitchen counter she makes her way to the [machinery that you need to make your preferred hot beverage]

[Think of like the kettle for tea, coffee machine for coffee, the fridge to grab some milk and back to the microwave if you are making hot chocolate. Or maybe something else. Just assume that you have it in your kitchen, for whatever beverage you are making.]

Her actions are influenced by her mood and seem to be more rough and powerful than necessary. [If you need the kettle you hastily grab it and forcefully open the faucet making water splash a lot before turning it down. Angrily scooping grounded coffee beans into the machine, spilling some power on the counter. If you want coffee pads (or whatever they are called) you can struggle with putting them in correctly. If you are pouring something in a glass or mug you moved the carton/container of liquid a bit too quick causing it to spill over the glass/mug before it goes in. Etc] While cleaning up the small mess she made she could hear her phone buzz against the kitchen counter. Almost making a sort of echoing sound in the quiet house. 

Taking a deep breath [y/n] tries to calm herself, feeling no need to take her anger out on whatever made the notification happen. Closing her eyes and placing her shoulders in a more relaxed position she makes her way over to the source of the noise. Silently hoping it is some form of good news she takes another deep breath. 

Picking up her phone and reading the now lit up screen her eyebrows furrow, no name showing of who had sent the message, indicating that she doesn't know the person. Confused as to why anybody she doesn't know has her number and would text her she unlocks her phone.

Her free hand makes its way to her lips and starts tugging on them out of habit. Her eyes scanning the screen as her eyebrows furrow even deeper than she thinks possible. Reading the message over and over again, her heartbeat racing up and her breathing quickens. Surely this must be some kind of joke, a terrible one, but a joke none the less. Who would joke with something like this? This can't be true.

Her eyes widen and her pupils shrink in size when the news had set in. Her body starts feeling really light and her head heavy. She feels like her legs wouldn't be able to support her weight anymore and she tries to stabilize herself by holding onto one of the kitchen counters. But before she could reach the support she feels herself fall, only she was falling for a bit too long. As if the floor was suddenly 5 meters/16.4 ft lower than it should have been.

Upon making contact with the floor on her previously injured back she rolls onto her side groaning in pain. Her face hidden by her shoulder as she faces the floor, eyes tightly shut ''Stupid gravity.'' Gritting her teeth she makes slow movements to get back up on her feet, making noises of discomfort along the way. Her eyes still tightly shut as she places one hand on her abused back that had started brushing up from the previous fall already. 

As she stands to her full height her head makes contact with the beam, causing her to hiss in pain and grab her forehead with both hands, the pain in her back suddenly feeling less bad. A quiet ''Motherf-'' leaving her lips as she cuts herself up, having promised herself to curse less.

A bunch of footsteps could be heard being made towards her. Removing one of her hands from her face and opening one eye slightly, she sees a view that she never imagined being true. She was standing in Bag End's entrance hall, slightly leaning forward as to not hurt herself in any more ways. Not even a second later than she had opened her eyes she saw a bunch of small figures running their way towards her, coming to a halt when they lay their eyes upon her.

''Ah dear, good to see that you could make it,'' came a soft, gentle and well-aged voice came from behind her. Quickly glancing behind her she removes her other hand from her head and opens her other eye as well. Coming up behind her was a man clad in grey clothes and holding a long walking staff in one of his hands. His grey hair long and curly laying across his shoulders and his long beard covering the better part of his chest. 

The man, known by most as Gandalf the Grey or simply Gandalf, came to a halt next to the girl who seemingly appeared out of nowhere. He placed a warm and gentle hand on her shoulder as he faces the way smaller figures that stood in front of her. Behind Gandalf came yet another small figure with a more than confused look on his face. How could she possibly have entered his house if she didn't knock on the door and he didn't invite her in?

She moves her glance between Gandalf and the smaller figure in front multiple times, her face showing the same amount of confusion as the host, if not more. ''I began to wonder if you would make it at all'' Gandalf looked towards the girl underneath his hand. Her eyes still wandering back and forth, her gaze lingering longer and longer on the smaller figures before she looks back at the wizard. She was more intrigued by them than she would care to admit.

Having drawn the lines to what has been going on she stops her gaze on the older man. Pointing one finger slowly at the man a soft but firm ''No'' is spoken. Shaking her finger up and down lightly, she closes her eyes and shakes her head too. ''Not now,'' she makes her way towards the front entrance, gently making her way through the group of small people. She grabs the door handle and twists it muttering ''Not today.''

Opening the door the soft and cold evening wind came over the people standing inside Bag End. The big group of small creatures standing there beyond confusion as all of them gaze at this woman, who appeared out of nowhere and is not known by any of them. Gandalf makes his way through the puddle of small creatures and tries to come and stand next to her.

Her face is plastered in sadness and her eyes get teary when she takes in the sight in front of her. The shimmering yellow lights in the hobbit holes and the soft green grass on the different levels of the earth bringing back memories. Memories of a small and young [y/n] running around and having fun with the people of Hobbiton. Trying not to let any of the tears spill she bit down on her bottom lip. ''You foul cruel old git,'' her voice close to trembling calls out, laced with lethal poison. 

''I thought you had been edging to go on an adventure for years?'' Gandalf spoke now also slightly puzzled by her behavior. He had known this girl for longer than she knows. He had seen her grown up, he thought that he knew her. But this kind of behavior was new and confusing. Her head turned to the older man and her voice sounded louder than was necessary ''Yes!'' But when looking at the wizard next to her a wave of sadness hit her square in the face. And to keep herself from crying, right then and there, she moves her dominant hand to pinch the bridge of her nose, stealthfully taking some tears out of her eyes. ''And I would have jumped on the opportunity immediately on any other day. But just not today,''  she spoke into her hand.

Feeling the confusion getting thicker by the passing seconds she braves to look in the eyes of Gandalf, pushing the sad feeling back down to the best of her abilities. ''You couldn't have picked any other day, could you?'' she nearly begged him as her voice became softer again. ''What has happened child?'' Gandalf spoke softly and carefully as he tries to place his hands on her shoulders, balancing the walking staff against his shoulder. But when he makes the movement the girl softly pushes his hands away, her eyes looking down at the garden she found herself standing in.

''You couldn't have known,'' she speaks more to herself than to Gandalf. She hugs herself as she takes two steps down the little garden path. Her face looking straight ahead, taking in the once familiar fields at nighttime. She closed her eyes a moment later and kept them closed when she moved her head slightly down and to the side ''You whisked me away right after I finished reading the message about how he has passed away.'' The voice that tried to remain strong reached not only Gandalf's ears but also those of the creatures, who had gathered closer to the wizard to follow what is going on.

Gripping his walking staff with both hands Gandalf looks troubled down at the ground. ''I'm sorry to hear that,'' a sincere apology came from the man, as he felt the weight of what he had done settle in his bones. Hugging herself tighter the girl squeezed her eyes even more and moved her head to look forwards again. ''You couldn't have known,'' she whispered to herself, trying to convince herself of it. ''Gandalf!'' a quiet but harsh-sounding voice called out. ''Who is he? Who died?'' followed soon after. 

Hearing these words filled [y/n] with an unnatural rage. Her hands turn to fists as she quickly lets go of herself and spins around sharply. ''That's none of your business!'' she hissed angrily at the group standing behind Gandalf. Her fist are clenched so hard together that she was cutting off some of her own blood supply and her eyes held a fierce fire in them, while the tears were making their way down her cheeks. Her heavy breathing being the only audible thing for the moment as the other people did not know how to take the sudden outburst from the stranger.

Not wanting to take her anger out on anyone she turned back around and made her way down the rest of the steps and walking to the end of the little garden path. ''I'm not up for an adventure right now,'' a quivering voice came out and she stayed facing away from the group. She effortlessly jumps over the small fence and made her way down a path, away from Bag End.

The group watched helplessly as the stranger woman walked away from their meeting place. ''And who was that suppose to be?'' a grumpy and rough voice called out, one belonging to the best-known son of Thrain. The rest of the company looking up to the tall wizard with the same question haunting their minds. Gandalf's eyes squinting closer to each other as his normally calm demeanor has hints of sadness in it ''That would be the final member of the company, our shadow.''

Nori looked even more confused upon hearing this answer ''She didn't look very willing to join.'' Gandalf was still looking at the retreating form of [y/n], refusing to look anywhere else ''She'll come around,'' he promised the dwarves and the hobbit standing behind him. ''I wouldn't count on it,'' Dwalin scowled at the sight, not being convinced by Gandalf's words at all. Some of the other dwarves make noises of agreement while others kept their hopes silent of the girl returning.

[Y/n] had started making her way past the small lake and towards the line of trees that showed the beginning of the forest. She was subconsciously hugging herself. She wasn't cold or anything, but somehow it just felt right to do. When she had walked past the lake she had seen her reflection within its waters and took note of what her clothes had been changed into.

[The belt thing would go over the long grey top but under the red top. The red top thing would also have a hood if you were to pull it over your head. ^^'' Sorry for the bad explanation.]

Pulling up the hood over her head she kept on walking, the lights of Hobbiton barely reaching to where she was. As she kept pushing on she could feel the warm and welcoming air from the town fading. A wind started to form and [y/n] reached down trying to pull her bolero over her nose. She felt lonely and lost as she makes her first steps into the woods. The sounds of the nocturnal animals and her boots crushing the ground filled her ears. 

Venturing deeper and deeper into the woods her only light was that reflecting off the moon. Even if it wasn't much, she could still see clearly around her. Other than it being dark, she had no indication what time it would be. No matter the time her body wasn't tired to the slightest. For she had just left her bed and barely used any of her energy. Just because she had been whisked away to somewhere else did not mean that her body clock would agree. And even if it would have normally loved to take a nap, no matter the time of day, sleeping in a dark forest without any camping gear just didn't feel like a great idea.

It wasn't like she didn't know how to make camp, it was just that she was lacking any supplies. Sure getting a fire going would have been no problem, seeing as the ground was dry it probably hadn't rained in a while. But sitting still on her own in the dark still didn't feel right. 

Where was she going? She had no clue. She had been here before, that she knew. It was just that it had been a couple of years since she last did. All the previous visits painted like dreams in her memories. And for now, she just needed some time to sort her thoughts. And not wanting the sit still somewhere, walking in a random direction seemed like a great idea at the time.

Drowning in grief some of her tears managed to escape her eyes. How was she meant to deal with this? She had read a message claiming that her father had died and when the news had settled itself deep within her brain, she was suddenly somewhere else. Somewhere where Gandalf wanted to start an adventure. Was he out of his mind?! As if she would have been up to the task. She could barely contain the storm of emotion brewing within herself, let alone keep a clear head to help the strange group on some kind of quest.

The group that had been standing behind Gandalf seemed odd. Other than all of their short structures that is. It had seemed like an odd bunch. Granted she hadn't seen them all for very long but some things just stuck out to her. At least one of them had bright white hair, making her wonder if they could be older than Gandalf himself. Another had an axe stuck in his head, and even though it didn't seem to bother them she still worried. What kind of thing could have been the reason for it to be stuck to begin with?

One had reminded her of a wolf with some grey streaks and then there was the one with the tattooed head. There was somebody with braids and beads in their mustache, quite a unique sight to see. And all of the strange hairstyles really had made her question with what kind of people Gandalf had been gathering. But the curly dirty blond hair stood out to her the most, amongst the sea of darker hair.

She had known Gandalf for quite a while, but she never knew him to spend much time with people. Let alone a whole group of strange figures. Granted she didn't know Gandalf as well as she would like to. If it would have been up to her younger self, she would have stayed with Gandalf. Traveling all over Middle Earth by his side. Alas, it was not meant to be. For shortly after their first meeting, she woke back up on Earth.

As previously stayed [y/n] had memories filled the lovely sights of Hobbiton but they had always felt more like dreams that she remembered. And considering she hadn't seen these sights since she was a small teenager she just assumed that it was a reoccurring dream she had.

How wrong did that turn out to be.

Unbeknownst to her, she had actually used the very little magic that was on Earth. She had used it to travel somewhere far away. And because she had done it before while she had been fallen asleep it went easier. Because you see, when you are falling asleep your mind is traveling to dreamland in order to let your body refresh itself. But because of the disconnection it was easier to bring herself somewhere else completely. Somewhere where she had dreamed of going for so long. Somewhere where she had imagined she would feel home for the first time.

She was able to it multiple times over the course of some years, but never had she figured out it was her using magic that had caused it. And when she saw Gandalf for the first time she just decided to stick with him for a bit. Something about him seemed familiar to her, and she would later figure out why.

Back over at Bag End the company of Thorin Oakenshield was preparing to go to bed themselves. Sure it might not have been that late, but Thorin had said that they would leave early in the morning to set out to their journey. Most of them had no problem falling into a peaceful slumber, but for others it was not so easy. Mainly because their minds got occupied with the strange woman. Who was she? What is her name? Would she return?

They had cleaned up their previous mess, or more like Gandalf told them to clean up. He had started to feel slightly guilty after what he had done. Don't get him wrong, he still had great fun, you should have seen Bilbo's face. It was precious.

But he just couldn't help himself to feel guilty after what [y/n] had told him. Gandalf knew exactly who she was speaking about. Even though Gandalf did not fully understand how [y/n]'s world worked, he did knew what a message meant.  It meant that something had come in, in that strange device that people called ''phones''. Maybe he should have thought about giving her a heads up. He had never summoned her before, she had always been able to come here freely by herself. But it had just been so long since her last visit, he had started to miss her. 

'If I didn't know her any better I would have said that she would have brought herself by now,' he thought to himself while keeping his gaze on the window. It had been a dry night so far. But from the looks of the clouds Gandalf gathered that rain would fall within a few days. 'But I do know her better,' adjusting his position he took a quick glance around the room. The dwarfs had fallen asleep all over the living room and some piling up in the hallways. Bilbo had gone to rest in his bedroom, still not agreeing with all the dwarves that were currently in his house. 

'But then again, I have never seen her grief before,' were his last thoughts before he drifted off to sleep.

~~~the next morning~~~

[Y/n] had been able to make quite the distance, but how far in total she had no clue. It didn't help that she made some turns and had no clue which way it was out of Hobbiton. But it is whatever, it's not like she actually had a plan of going somewhere specifically anyway.

Luckily it had stayed dry the entire night, [y/n] had never been the one to enjoy being soaked to the bone. She doubts anybody would. It is an awful feeling after all.

By now her feet started to hurt a bit as well. Sure she was fine with walking long distances, but that was either with friends when they went somewhere fun, or she would have been lost in her music. But without both it was starting to take a toll on her. 

[Y/n] ducks underneath some low hanging branches, not noticing how some of her clothes got stuck on some thorns from the bushes below. Trying to take another step she feels the tug of the fabric and takes hold of it. Nearly at the end of her patience she rips the fabric free, not stopping to check if that had made any holes in her clothes.

Were they even her clothes? I mean sure, she was wearing them, but were they hers to own. She had worn pajama's when she left Earth and had no clue where these came from. All she could hope for is that Gandalf didn't somehow change her clothes on will. A cold shiver running down her spine at the thought of Gandalf seeing her in her underwear. 

[Y/n] shakes her head in an attempt to get rid of the thoughts. Steadily keep on walking she starts to hear loud voices. She couldn't really make out the specific conversations but she defiantly heard the words ''hobbit'' ''contract'' ''bet'' and ''pony''. Confused as to how that could be a normal conversation she tried sneaking closer to the sounds. 

During the night [y/n] had had enough time to let the bad news set in. And sure she was still sad, she would never get to see the man that taught her how to read ever again, but maybe some distraction was good for her. She had tried to make her go back multiple times as well last night. But as you can see, none of those attempts were successful ones.

Moving closer to the sounds, careful not to get noticed right away, [y/n] could see a line of ponies. Leading upfront was Gandalf himself on a normal-sized horse. [Y/n] moved along with the group only hidden from view, for she still wasn't sure herself if she should join or not. All in all she still was mad at Gandalf for summoning her like that. But if she sticks with stalking the group then they will probably find her creepy when they find her.

If they find her.

Not completely convinced of her stealth skills she kept at a distance, having to pay very close attention to whatever words were being spoken if she wanted to stand a chance of catching what is being said. She was satisfied with how close she was able to get though.  And with the advantage of not being spotted (yet, that is) she was able to stare at the companions for a bit longer than probably was socially acceptable.

And with this longer inspection, she had drawn the conclusion on what was the cause of the small-sized group looking like an odd bunch. They were dwarves. Don't get me wrong, [y/n] had gotten used to most people being smaller than herself. She just didn't think they would be something completely different. [Y/n] just couldn't place her finger on it, that they were dwarves,  when she had seen them so quickly the day before. 

As [y/n] was studying the faces of Gandalf's traveling companions a loud ''Wait!'' could be heard. Quickly moving behind a big tree, to stay out of sight, she heard it again. Peeking around the tree she could see the line of equestrians coming to a stop as a small figure came closer. It was the hobbit that she was able to spot yesterday, the one that probably owns Bag End. He was slightly out of breath and was waving a long piece of paper around ''I've signed it.''

The hobbit walked closer to the dwarf with a mighty white beard, handing the paper over. The dwarf took it and brought out some kind of magnifying thing to look at what had been written. The doo-hickey reminding [y/n] of those loupes that she had seen jewelers use in some of the movies she had watched. Having no clue if that was an actual thing that jewelers would do, she had just brushed it off as one of those Hollywood movie stereotypes.

''Everything seems to be in order,'' the dwarf spoke out loud, informing his companions about his findings. Moving her eyes slightly over to the man who had brought her here she could see that he had a small smile on his face, clearly enjoying the development. ''Welcome master Baggins, to the company,'' the white-haired dwarf continued. ''Of Thorin Oakenshield.''

Now [y/n] had no clue which one of the dwarves was suppose to be this Thorin, but she started to mentally play Guess who? with herself, trying to figure out who it could be. After all, if you are stalking a group, might as well figure out their names and maybe status out of boredom.

The dwarf that made her think of a wolf looked down at this ''Master Baggins'' with his mouth slightly ajar. 'What kind of title is master?' [y/n] wondered to herself as the wolf dwarf gave an order ''Give him a pony.''

''Master Baggins'' starts protesting at the order given. ''No, no, no, no. That...that won't be necessary. Thank you. I'm sure I can keep up on foot,'' at this [y/n] silently snickers. She could see herself keep up with the bunch of ponies, especially if they were going to keep going at the same slow pace that had so far. But the small hobbit? It amused her simply thinking of the image.

''Yeah, I...I've done my fair share of walking holidays, you know? Even got as far as Frog Morton once,'' he kept going, making her wonder where Frog Morton laid and how it looked. The only other place then Hobbiton that she could remember the name off (and the general direction) was Rivendell.

While ''Master'' Baggins was trying to excuse the order two of the dwarves had come up behind him. They lifted him by his arms and on to the last available pony. Now that she was closer something else popped up in her mind. The blond dwarf with a braided mustache somehow reminded her of Asterix. And with this thought came the difficult task of keeping her laugh silent.

The company of ... someone, [y/n] always had trouble remembering names, started to move again. She wanted to follow them but a sudden loud rumble from her stomach made her freeze behind the big tree. She squeezed her eyes as hard as she could, praying to whoever would listen that they didn't notice her. She could hear one pony and its rider trying to get closer to her when ''Master ...Somebody'' speaks up loudly ''... Wait. Wait,'' and there is a small pause. ''Stop! STOP!'' he yells clear as day, after declaring that his voice goes back to one that sounds logical ''We have to turn around.''

''What on Earth is the matter?'' [y/n] hears Gandalf getting irritated. The Gandalf she used to know had always so much patience, what had gotten to him? Was it maybe the way she had acted yesterday towards him? ''I've forgotten my handkerchief,'' ''Master Somebody'' admits sounding slightly embarrassed. Hearing the ponies move away again [y/n] dares a small look around the tree trunk, seeing if she was in the clear to move again.

While she was doing that she hadn't noticed that one dwarf had spotted her from the back of the line. He watched her with curiosity twinkling in his eyes. Sure he could have easily pointed her out to the others, but she is unarmed and is no threat to them.  If Gandalf wanted her along on the adventure surely she wouldn't attack them. She didn't look that sketchy either, more confused and unsure.

Curious to see what the strange woman had in mind the dwarf kept to himself. A mischievous smile complimenting his features. 

date: 12/01/2021
words: 5384