~Sara~

Everyone was awake and waiting for them.

Sara approached Thomas, knowing he also received a harsh couple of words from Newt. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "He was right, though. And Sara..." He reached out to touch her forearm, "...Don't worry about me. We'll help him, okay?" he reassured, and Sara gave him a sad smile, nodding.

"Is everyone okay?" Brenda asked everyone as a whole. They all looked at each other uneasily, but they nodded. "We need to figure out what to do. Newt doesn't have a lot of time."

She was right, and Sara was terrified of the thought. Now there had to be another last-minute change of plans because of Newt.

"I'm gonna go talk to him, then bring him in here," suggested Sara. "He needs to hear about what's gonna happen when we discuss it."

"He's asleep," said Thomas. "Go relax, Sara. You can wait 'till he wakes up."

Sara was disappointed. Even though Newt probably needed the sleep, she wanted to talk to him as soon as possible, and reassure him that he wasn't the monster he probably thought he was. The guilt he carried was enough for a lifetime. He needed to let go of it for once and for all.

Minho placed a hand on her shoulder and leaned into her ear. "You know this could be the last time you guys could be together. We don't know how much time he's got."

"Yeah," she whispered back. "What's your point?"

He gave her a knowing look, raising his eyebrows. "You guys should enjoy your moment together, like it could be the last one. I don't want that to happen, I'm just saying. You might not get the future you want. At least give yourselves a chance before the end."

Sara sucked in a sharp breath and looked at Minho with disbelief. Although his intentions were good, she didn't want to precipitate herself with negative thoughts like that. There had to be a solution.

"We're not gonna do it just 'cause of that, and especially not when he's not feeling well," she whispered back at him, frowning.

Minho only raised his hands in defense, but he did drop the subject.

Sara knew she would only entirely give herself to Newt when it was all over, and if that moment never came, she would still respect herself and Newt for the time they were together until then. That moment had to be special, and not a desperate attempt to make up for time that would never return.

Sara excused herself from the group, taking the opportunity to refresh herself, clean herself of the blood from the encounter with the guards, and to simply wash away a lot of the pain. Not to mention, she was the only one left to clean herself up as the others had done it while she slept.

She was glad the berg came with the commodities of a home, and extra clothes that actually fitted her. Or maybe it was just Jorge being well-prepared for this escape. It made her wonder how long he'd been planning this before Rebecca even told her anything.

Stripping the old clothes off, she hopped into the shower, setting the water to a comfortably warm temperature. As she scrubbed her skin, she watched the dirt and blood mixed with suds wash down the drain, like a poetic representation of her life.

It was a moment to reflect on what they'd been through and let go of all the selfish thoughts that trapped her in the past. Everyone mattered, not just Newt, and they all deserved a chance with a new life.

She finished by adding shampoo and conditioner to her hair, making her long, brunette strands as smooth as ever, and smelling like heaven.

Once she dried herself and stepped out, she pulled on new clothes, undergarments and a plain T-shirt and some shorts she found in one of the drawers. The mirrors were all foggy from the heat of the shower, so she walked over to open the door and let the air take care of that. Meanwhile, she used another towel to dry her hair.

She searched through the duffle bag next to the shower and luckily found a brush. She began to brush through her hair as she waited for the mirror to clear up, grimacing anytime the bristles came across a knot. As her strands smoothed out, she couldn't help but feel lucky she was able to stand there and do something as simple as brushing her hair, when many people had no access to basic needs out there.

Once the condensation was completely gone, Sara was left to stare at herself in the mirror. She set the brush down and slowly walked closer, furrowing her eyebrows as she took a look at the stranger staring back at her. It'd been a really long time since she felt she last looked at her own reflection.

She didn't look emaciated, but she definitely lost a lot of weight after all those days being sick at HQ. Dark bags surrounded her eyes, and she gave special attention to all the scars on her face and arms; any part of visible skin had some sort of mark on it.

She'd forgotten all about the horrors she faced, which gave her all those scars, and how she wasn't ever the same after being attacked in the Glade that day.

Gently, she ran her fingers across the scars below her lip and above her eyebrows. Maybe she deserved them; after all, she got them because the Gladers didn't trust her. Maybe she was rightfully served for not having a clear goal in mind, or maybe her intentions were all over the place, and she only wanted to save herself and Newt.

"You look beautiful," she heard someone say. Gasping, she whipped her head to the door. Newt stood there with a soft look in his eyes; eyes which also held deep regret. He took a step closer to her and immediately held his hands out. "Please don't be scared—it's me. It's me, love."

Sara hadn't flinched or anything. She only stood there, looking back at him, feeling so guilty for making him think she was terrified of him. She wasn't. If only she hadn't backed away from him back there, he wouldn't have had that fear. She was only scared of what the Flare was doing to his mind, not of Newt himself.

"I'm not scared of you, Newtie," she said, walking towards him. "I'm sorry about that back there, I'd just never seen you so angry. But I know that wasn't your fault."

Newt grimaced. "You're sorry? It's not my fault? Sara, I pushed you against the edge of a table," he said fiercely, the guilt reflected in his sad, brown eyes. "I screamed at Brenda, at Tommy, and Minho—I..." he paused, covering his face with his hands, "Minho... I think I lost my best friend."

Reaching up, Sara moved his hands away and cupped his face, shushing him softly to calm him. "You didn't. I already talked to him, and look, I never thought about anyone else, just about saving you—and I don't even know if I was just doing that for myself. I need you to understand that things are not your fault. It wasn't right to expose Minho or Thomas like that, but we all know you can't control that."

She could tell he was thoroughly ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth. Before you woke up, Minho and I—"

"Shh." She gently placed her finger over his lips. "I know. It's okay, I think you and Minho just need to talk things out."

Newt still had a pained expression, and his forehead creased as he leaned closer to her. Closing his eyes, he rested his forehead on hers.

"Then you know I'm dangerous, Sara. You shouldn't be with me anymore. I can't live with myself knowing I can hurt you anytime whenever... that takes over my mind," he whispered.

Sara hadn't let go of his face still, and she caressed his hair, his face, his neck, closing her eyes and breathing in his scent now that he was so close to her. The tip of his nose occasionally rubbed against hers. Sara shook her head, furrowing her eyebrows.

"I don't care," she softly whispered. "You can't ask me to leave you; it'll hurt us both. I can't leave you alone in this, and you know you'll feel worse thinking everything was your fault."

Newt snaked his arms around her waist, bringing her even closer to him, and Sara knew he didn't want to detach from her. Even if he told her to leave for her own safety, he wouldn't really want her to. She felt he was silently begging for her to stay with him, even though he knew she was in danger if she did. And he didn't want to say anything, probably fearing he would sound selfish.

He sucked in a shaky breath as he leaned back a little, to look straight into her eyes.

"I love you," he said, his voice breaking.

"Always," they said at the same time, and Sara smiled at him, trying her absolute best to hide the sadness she felt.

"I love you always. Always, you hear me?" she emphasized, keeping her hands on his face as she gave him a fierce look. "And no matter what, I'll be with you. But we have to put up a fight, okay?" Newt nodded. "Promise me, Newt. Promise me you'll still fight 'till the end. And when I mean the end, I mean when we win," she added, slightly shaking him, "promise me."

He searched her eyes, sighing softly. "I promise."

"Good," she said, with a single nod.

They both stared at each other, both pairs of eyes full of emotion and pain, like if their whole lives up until that point were etched in their eyes forever. Sara's lip trembled, and Newt kept staring at her longingly.

Their lips immediately crashed together, and Sara closed her eyes, wrapping her arms around him, and prepared to cherish the moment forever.

She ran her fingers through his hair, lightly tugging at it, then caressing his neck, and moving her hands all over his shoulders and his back. Newt kissed back fiercely, his hands roaming around her waist and up her sides. It was the best feeling ever. Newt always made her feel so good, and all she wanted was to give him her all.

Minho's earlier suggestion sprung to mind as they kissed, and she couldn't help wanting more and more of Newt the farther he explored her skin. She could feel his eagerness, and the crazy passion of a teenager experiencing their first love like it was their last day on this planet.

Sara was ashamed to admit it was Newt who suddenly pulled away right as she considered quite literally ripping his shirt off.

Returning to her senses, she realized she wouldn't have been able to stop if Newt hadn't first. "I'm sorry," she whispered as their foreheads rested against each other once more.

To her surprise, Newt smiled at her. He was panting, and although he seemed alright, there was concern in his eyes. "No, we both wanted that... I just don't want to disrespect you like I almost did out in the Scorch."

"You could never disrespect me," she whispered as they pulled apart.

Sara was well aware the Flare had him barely being able to control his temper and his actions, making it indeed a great feat that he was able to stop.

It wasn't even Sara in her sane mind, and she wanted to blame the uncertainty of Newt's future, but she had to admit that love wasn't something to be played with.

She could give Minho multiple reasons why she would wait, but in the end, Newt awoke feelings inside of her that she couldn't even fully understand. The inexplicable comfort she felt anytime he was near, and the shivers on her skin anytime they touched came to mind. Every day, she admired the size of his strength despite what he was going through.

No matter how blindly enraged the Flare caused him to be, he was gentle. It might have sounded as if she'd forgotten the moments where he was, in fact, no way near gentle. However, whenever he exceeded himself, it would immediately break him, and he simply had to be gentle again.

Of course, it wasn't always like that in the beginning, especially when he discovered her lie in the Glade, but he would never physically hurt her intentionally, and he would always admit his errors. He believed in her and supported her, and he would kindly let her know if at some point he disagreed with her. He actually knew what it meant to respect his significant other, and they both learned so much from each other, yet Sara felt like she was constantly still learning from him.

Their journey together was not always sunshine and roses, and just for that reason, what they had together felt real.

Someone like that wasn't someone she could dare to let go of.

He was truly an admirable human being, and with resolve, that was when she realized she could never love anyone or anything as deeply. Not even her own life.

Newt took her hands in his and kissed them.

"Someday, we'll do our vows, and then I'll be yours, and you'll be mine," he said. "I love you so much, and I don't want to shuck this up. Wait for me until I'm well, yah?" he asked, and his voice cracked, making her worry that he didn't believe he would make it. She still smiled at him while tears formed in her eyes.

But at that very moment, she knew that if they could find a cure without either of them dying, one day she would say those vows with full conviction that they would both hold true to them.

After a few moments of silence, enjoying the company of the other, they decided to join the others, who were probably tired of waiting for the couple.