~Sara~

"Thomas," Sara called him as she saw him walking near the north opening of the walls. The Gladers were looking at each other in a panic as they gathered near the doors. "Thomas!"

He finally turned his head toward her and approached her in a jog. "Yeah?"

"What the shuck is going on?" Sara asked, looking around frantically.

He took his eyes away from her and looked over at Newt for a moment. Sara also took a look and saw him pacing back and forth in front of the Maze.

"Talk! For shuck's sake, you're making me nervous!" Sara shouted at Thomas, gripping the bars.

For Thomas to look so worried, it meant seriously bad news. "It's Alby and Minho. They're in the Maze checking out the dead Griever Minho found yesterday."

"And they're not back yet?" she asked in a frenzy, feeling a massive headache coming. "Aren't the doors about to close?"

"Why do you think Newt's so stressed out," he answered matter-of-factly.

The days of peace were over. Literally every day since Thomas came, something had gone out of the ordinary. Yesterday, Minho found a dead Griever, and then Ben was banished during closing time. Sara heard about what he did to Thomas, and it saddened her that people had to get banished for things they couldn't really control.

Thomas was terrified during the whole banishment. He stayed with Sara, right next to the slammer during the whole thing. And she knew he was feeling the weight of everyone's blame on him for everything that had gone wrong so far. She'd already had her share of that weight.

But he and Teresa did have direct affiliations with WICKED, unlike Sara. It didn't surprise her that the boys who'd gone through the Changing saw what Thomas and Teresa had done. She was sure WICKED fed both of them the whole 'the end justifies the means' klunk, so Sara wouldn't go as far as being angry at them. They probably didn't even remember any of it.

"Can you please tell Newt to come talk to me?" Sara asked Thomas.

Thomas hesitated, but he nodded either way. "I'll try. He's nervous though. I tried talking to him before, but he just keeps yelling at me, saying that I don't know what I'm talking about."

"Well, for starters, you're still a Greenie—sort of. And second, you're not the one who was dating him. Go get him, please," she told him as kindly as she could.

Thomas glared at her for a second, then reluctantly trudged over to Newt.

Sara didn't know if Newt would want to talk to her. She'd noticed him trying to approach her in the last day or two, but he always changed his mind.

Then she thought about Minho and Alby. They couldn't die out there. She'd never be able to live with the fact that she couldn't save two of the people that really mattered to her in the Glade; people that also greatly mattered to Newt. She knew this was tearing Newt apart, and girlfriend or not, she was still willing to make sure he was okay.

"Sara," he called to her. She hadn't noticed him coming as she spaced out. His voice was hoarse, which meant he'd probably been crying.

Sara slowly stared up at him and softly gasped as she took in his appearance. His hair was disheveled, probably from passing a hand through it so many times out of frustration. His eyes were red and puffy, and he looked exhausted.

She gave him a hopeful smile. "Hey, we're talking about two of the bravest people. Alby and Minho should be here any minute," she said, trying to sound encouraging.

He shook his head doubtfully. "But something's just wrong about the whole bloody thing. It's not just that. The shuck girl is eating less, keeps mumblin' all kinds of weird stuff, and now Alby and Minho—"

"Hey—Newt!" They heard Chuck yell out in the distance. He was standing next to a group of boys looking into the entrance of the Maze. "I see them, they're coming!"

Newt's eyes widened as he stared back at Sara.

"Go!" Sara shouted, but she still gave him an encouraging smile. Poor Newt, he seemed relieved and quickly jogged over to the group. Sara was glad he would now have at least fewer things to worry about.

Her headache worsened all of a sudden, making her reel and stumble. She figured asking to see Alby and Minho would have to wait until after she took a nap as she could hardly withstand the pain. She lay down right where she was standing seconds before and had no recollection of how or when she fell asleep.

❀❀❀

"Sara! Sara—wake up!" She was up in an instant as she heard Chuck's frantic screams.

"W—what's going on?" she groggily asked as she stood up and rubbed her eyes. Her headache was almost completely gone at least.

"It's Newt," he said, and Sara was immediately alert once he said so. "You better come help him, or he might do something to himself." His face was twisted with worry, and his words made Sara's insides freeze.

"Chuck, I fell asleep for like five minutes, what happened? Aren't Alby and Minho back—what happened to Newt?" she asked, her heart beginning to pound against her chest.

Chuck shook his head. "That's the thing. They didn't make it on time—Alby looked hurt, and Minho was struggling to drag him back," he said, fidgeting with his hands.

"What?" She gripped the bars tightly, the panic crawling back into her head.

"And that's not all... Thomas—that shucking crazy klunk-head... he ran into the Maze just as the doors were closing. Now there are three shanks that won't be coming back," he said, shaking his head miserably.

"No..." Sara's voice quivered as she covered her mouth.

"How could you sleep through all that?" He furrowed his brows at her. "It definitely wasn't just five minutes."

Embarrassed, she shook her head, dismissing his judgmental interrogation. She was a heavy sleeper, what else could she say?

Brushing away the comment, she gave the boy a firm look. "Chuck, where's Newt? I need to see him."

Chuck dangled a pair of keys in the air for her to see, and her mouth fell open. "Newt was distracted so I took 'em. He needs you—he's pretty torn up. The shank ran off to the deadheads again. I didn't know what else to do, I'm sorry—"

"What do you mean again?" she asked, frowning. She was fully convinced there was something going on with Newt that he wasn't telling her about.

Chuck's eyes grew wide. "Uh... ya know—that's where you both usually go when you're upset."

"Chuck," she said warningly, "is there something else I need to know?"

"Nope, not that I know of," he said, crossing his arms over his chest, and Sara looked at him suspiciously.

Sighing, she finally agreed. "Fine—the keys, Chuck!" she hurried him.

He scrambled with them, but he finally unlocked her from her dreaded prison. She hoped no one would find out she was becoming a temporary fugitive because of Newt.

❀❀❀

She found him leaning his arm against the bark of a large tree in the deadheads, its foliage casting a shadow over Newt's golden hair like a canopy. His back was facing her, and she took cautious steps toward him.

"Just leave, I don't want to talk to anyone," he muttered, not bothering to turn around. He sounded a lot more collected than Sara imagined he would be.

She took a deep breath before opening her mouth. "I know, I'm sorry, but I'm worried about you."

He brought his arm back down and turned around to see her, his face full of surprise. "Sara? What—?"

She raised her arms defensively. "Chuck got me out... with... your keys," she said, shrugging sheepishly. He stuck his hand in his pocket and took it back out; he was empty-handed. Sara quickly clarified that it would only be for a couple of minutes before he could protest.

He didn't seem to think it was a huge deal. His thoughts were elsewhere.

All of a sudden, he said, "they're gone," in the most defeated voice Sara had ever heard.

Sara could only hope with every part of her being that Rebecca could somehow help them. The boys couldn't just die out there. They were strong, couldn't they survive the night?

No one survives a night in the Maze.

That was what she'd heard Newt say before. She couldn't just give him false hope, saying that they could live, when she wasn't even so sure of it herself. But that was all she had for him at the moment.

Thinking of something quickly, something that was better than just telling him things were gonna be okay, she finally spoke up. "Look, I don't know what it is, but there's something about Minho and Thomas that just sparks the feeling that they're much stronger than we think. And they've got Alby. What if they do live? We'll wake up tomorrow to greet them back—"

"You don't understand," he cut her off sharply. "They're already dead, that's just how it is. This isn't your lab where you can control whatever happens in the Maze. Three of my friends just died out there. Three of the people I've done a lot of harm to—they're dead!"

He wasn't crying, but there was a whole turmoil of emotions inside of him that was killing him. It was guilt. Self-inflicted guilt was the worst poison a broken person like Newt could ingest.

Sara inhaled sharply. "It's not your fault—"

"I'm bad news for everyone who gets close to me. And I can never say I'm sorry enough times before I lose them," he complained, covering his face with one hand.

Sara didn't want to be that selfish person that assumed he was trying to indirectly apologize to her, but she couldn't help it. Regardless of how she felt, she knew he was talking about the guys in the Maze.

"Knowing you, I'm sure you already apologized to all of them," she said, trying to lift his mood if only a little.

"You're part of the list too," he surprised her as he spoke. He avoided her eyes, however. "I care about you. We're not exactly what you would call great right now, but I'm about to lose you too—"

"No," she interrupted, shaking her head. "The last thing you need is to stress about me right now. This isn't healthy for you." She tried convincing him to take care of himself, because it was obvious he'd stopped doing that.

He only stared at her, a distressed look on his face before passing a hand over his entire face. "I haven't apologized to you yet, haven't I?"

She blinked back at him, not knowing how to interpret his tone of voice. "What sin have you committed lately?"

"I took things too far, and I think I'm paying the price for it," he said, his voice quieting down as he looked down at his feet. "I'm sorry."

Sara tried to walk even closer to him, not too quickly, in case he still didn't want her near him. When she saw that he didn't flinch or back away, she took the chance to hug him. Maybe it was too much of a daring move. She felt uncomfortable when she didn't feel the warmth of his arms around her. Slowly, she began to let him go, her face a burning red, and her heart accelerating.

He ended her moment of mortification by gently pulling her toward him, wrapping his arms around her body. Relief filled her entire existence, but she still raised her head to look up at him for confirmation.

"Because of you, there's a part of me that still thinks they might survive out there. But if they don't, I'll never forgive myself," Newt whispered as they pulled away.

"You need to let go of that guilt that doesn't belong to you," Sara began. Newt leaned his body against the tree. It would take a lot of convincing for him to believe that—if he ever accepted it at all.

He sighed before he looked over at her again. "You should probably head back to the pit before anyone sees you."

Sara's disappointment was greater than her nerves. "Well, as of right now, you're the leader, Newt." She sighed, clasping her hands behind her back. "Please get me out of there." She meant it. Another day in the pit would drive her insane.

"Doesn't change anything," he said. His eyes looked regretful, but his words didn't sound so. "You were already voted to be in there, and it's for your own protection too. I wouldn't be able to do anything because I'd be revoking Alby's commands. That's highly forbidden."

Sara bowed her head in surrender and began walking out of the deadheads. It upset her that he didn't seem angry anymore, yet he was acting either distant or less worrisome when it came to her. He did say that he was only trying to protect her, right? So maybe she was the one being selfish.

However, that was exactly what she told him she was doing when she lied about everything she knew; that she was only trying to protect him. And he chose to cut her off instead of trying to understand her decisions. She understood that it was on a much larger scale, but still.

"You coming?" she asked, turning back to Newt.

"No," he replied, and shook his head. "Just please get Chuck to lock you up again and to bring me the keys back."

Sara selected her words carefully to leave him with one last thought. "Listen, I'm gonna try my best to give you space and time to yourself. I just wish... you could see exactly what I've been trying to get you to understand this whole time. The need to protect the other is mutual, it's not just yours. Don't forget that."

He was a bit shocked at her words, and Sara could tell he wanted to say something, but she didn't stay around long enough for a response. Having said what she needed to say, she finally walked back to get Chuck to lock her up back in the pit.

❀❀❀

The next day, Sara was awakened by shouting, which had been a recurrent morning routine lately.

"No way! They're alive!" She heard distant yelling as she scrambled up to her feet. Had she heard well?

Oh, thank goodness.

She saw Newt running toward the north wall, and she gripped the bars, impatiently waiting to get to see the three of them once they ran back into the Glade.

She knew Alby was hurt, but she didn't know what his condition currently was, and Thomas lived long enough to receive his punishment while Minho was probably as good as new.

Since Thomas broke the rules, the Keepers would have a Gathering because of him, and then maybe he'd also be sent to the slammer, where he could at least keep her company.

A couple of eternal minutes later, Newt walked over to Sara. His eyes had a slight new spark to them. He nodded at her and gave her a small smile, indicating all three of them arrived safely.

"But Alby... he got stung. Hopefully the serum can help him," he informed her.

Sara sighed with relief. "I'm so glad they're alive, and I hope Alby recovers."

"You were right," he said, rubbing his chin.

Sara raised an eyebrow at him. "That's not the only thing you came to tell me, is it?" she asked suspiciously.

It turned out that the rest of the Council had the marvelous idea of withholding a double Gathering today. Sara hoped they would at least give Thomas and Minho a chance to get checked by the Med-jacks and get some rest before attending.

Nevertheless, Thomas and Sara would both be invited to witness how a group of Keepers talked about what naughty children they'd been, and then they'd decide on a punishment. Thomas would most likely be sent to the pit, and Sara would finally be told whether or not she would be sentenced to death.

❀❀❀

Right before Thomas and Sara were each invited to take a seat, Sara practically lunged at Minho, embracing him so tightly and telling him how happy she was that he was alive. Then, with a lot more composure, she took the chance to hug Thomas and tell him the same thing.

She didn't even bother to look at Newt at the moment. He acted like he didn't care that they weren't together anymore, but she knew he did, and Sara certainly did care.

Her palms were sweaty as she kept her hands clasped together on her lap. Thomas was receiving his sentence of one night in the pit and no food. And Minho recommended he replaced him as the Keeper of the Runners, which was obviously a shocker to everyone. There was so much discussion and arguing that Sara was shifting in her seat during the whole thing, wishing she was miles away from the stupid Gathering.

It was Newt's idea to appoint Thomas just as a Runner, and of course, Gally and plenty others deliberately disagreed. But this time, they weren't the majority. Gally had left the Gathering after a brief confrontation with Minho, but since Sara's sentence was an issue of his undivided interest, he eventually came back.

The Gathering had to be done without Alby, so Sara could imagine the pressure Newt had on his shoulders at the moment.

Finally, her turn to speak arrived.

"Sara," Newt began, "we've already discussed plenty about your case in the last Gathering. We've decided that it's now your turn to talk." He then gestured to Minho. "He confirmed that you have a lot of valid reasons for what you did."

Sara took a deep breath.

Oh shuck, I don't think I'm ready for this.

All of the Keepers' eyes—and Newt's—were on her, expecting something out of her.

What else could she tell them that they didn't already know? They'd probably lynch her if she didn't give them at least something, so she decided to begin with something radical.

"Well, uh... you may think I was in WICKED HQ the longest, but that's not true," she started. Sara paused and scanned everyone's faces as they stared back at her attentively. She took another deep breath to continue. "I—well, when I was taken, all of you guys had already been there for years. I got there right after my own uncle Janson..." she paused, swallowing really hard as she looked down at her lap, "...he murdered my entire family. And I didn't even find out until years later, here in the Glade."

She scanned the room, watching with nervous anticipation as every jaw fell open, and then an uproar of voices broke out in Council Hall.

Great start, Sara.