There is anger deep in my soul

Etched in my body

Or maybe it's in my blood

I think it was there when I was born

Maybe I learned to control it when I was twelve

Or thirteen

Or maybe I never really how to do that

But only how to suppress it

How to pretend it doesn't exist And not let it eat me alive.

Either way, it exists

I pretend I am not angry.

And most of the times I am not

The average person doesn't see me angry

And even I do not most of the time

But there will moments

When I WILL latch out

And those will never be pretty

There will be moments—

Split seconds

When the anger will roar out

So fast

So subtly

I will not see it coming myself

And I will never be the same anymore

I will never quite calm down the same way

I was before

I do not know where it comes from

Or maybe I do

It's From all those times I didn't react like the average person

All those times I calmed myself down

I know where it comes from

It's from all those times I suppressed my emotions

To not create a mess.

Well I guess I because they biggest of them all

Worst thing?

I don't think I can save me.

Maybe all calm people hold this storm inside them.

I do not know how to predict when I will latch out

All I know is that it happens when I've had enough of being strong

And when you've been strong for a very long time

You do not know when you break and let it all out.

I just... do not want to become a monster

I just do not want to see the light die in my eyes

Just like it did in so many's around me

And sometimes I wonder if we are not doomed to have the same fate as those around us

If all our efforts do no really matter

Because in the end

we make the same mistakes

And end up the exact same way

As those before us

-S. Trig (Ig poet.werenolonely)

you can follow my Ig poet.werenolonely for poetry everyday. I'll try to post more here. we'll see how it goes. tell me what you think of this poem. 

I dedicate this to f_awziyyat, because she's a lovely sweet person. She read Perfection, a sci-fi on my profile, and left lovely comments. She also follows my poetry account on IG (poet.werenotlonely)