I did a double update last week so make sure you've read chapter 30 before you read this :)

-

"Hey Tae, can we do the group study session at your dorm today?" Jimin asks as he leans his head onto Taehyung's shoulder.

Taehyung looks up at Jungkook and feels his breath slightly hitch at their close proximity. Without another word, their lips meet into a gentle kiss. Their lips mould into each other like pieces of a puzzle. They hold each other with urgency yet their touch is ever so gentle.

"Uhh, Tae?"

Taehyung snaps out of his thoughts, "uh- what- ye-yeah," he answers mindlessly, his face flushed from his lingering thoughts.

Jimin rests his head back on Taehyung's shoulder and mumbles something about him always getting distracted. Taehyung smiles awkwardly and pats the boy's head.

"So what I'm trying to say is, ass is better than tits." Hoseok says to Namjoon as they walk over and take a seat next to their friends.

"No. Tits provide milk to nurture future generations. Ass just provides shit," Namjoon answers, making the colloquial words sound ever so sophisticated.

Hoseok frowns. "No, but like in bed. It's not like you're gonna drink the milk bro."

"Oh yeah, and you're going to eat the shit?" Namjoon quirks his eyebrows.

Hoseok frowns, "yeah duh."

Jin grimaces, "Seok, you're sex life is disgusting. I just- ew."

Hoseok snickers, "oh yeah? Don't act like you don't do worse, Jin. I know that you're a kinky motherfucker." Jin just rolls his eyes but doesn't disagree.

"Honestly, you guys are all kinky motherfuckers," Jimin says while making a face. "Accept you, Tae. I believe out of all of us, you're the only innocent one."

Taehyung blushes and looks away. "Y-yeah."

Jinyoung snickers. "Yeah, I bet Taehyung is a virgin." Taehyung frowns as he looks over at him. The boy stares back at him, expression exuding innocence yet his eyes give him away; Those dark pits have this evil glint in them that has Taehyung squirming anxiously in his seat.

"Anyways, are you ready for finals coming up? It's literally in a few weeks. I can't believe how close we are to graduating," the boy speaks up, breaking eye contact with the blue-head.

"I don't even know why they accepted you into school so late," Hoseok says while shaking his head.

Jinyoung chuckles, "I mean I had to move to Seoul cause of my dad's job. It's not like I can just ride back to my old school every day." The boy's nod in understanding and continue to converse about the upcoming graduation.

"Honestly, I think Tae and Joon are the only ones that are gonna be successful outta us," Jin says before he takes a large bite out of his apple.

Jimin nods, "bro my mum yelled at me the other day cause she saw ' male stripper's income' on my browsing history."

Taehyung looks over at the blond, looking rather appalled. Jimin giggles and shrugs, "we're not all smart like you, Tae."

"No, but, a stripper?"

"Or a librarian, I dunno."

Taehyung gives the boy a weird look. "That's a big difference, Chim."

Jimin nods, "yeah I guess. Anyways, what do you want to be? I'm sure you have a lot of options."

Taehyung smiles, "I don't exactly know what I want to be yet. I just know that I want to move to Japan after school finishes."

Jimin widens his eyes, "Japan? Why Japan?"

Taehyung shrugs, "It seems cool there."

Jimin pouts, "aw, that means I won't get to see you as much."

Taehyung laughs, "you can always visit me. Maybe you can meet one of those 'hot virtual anime girls' then."

Jimin's eyes widen, "DUDE YES!"

~

"What do you want to do after you graduate?" Taehyung asks Jungkook, thinking back to the conversation he had with his friends. Jungkook looks up from his textbook and then smiles at the boy.

"I don't really know. Just know that I wanna get out of here," he says with a chuckle. Taehyung nods in agreement and then waddles over to him. He lays down on his bed and then supports himself with his arm, looking up at the ravenette who is sitting at his desk.

Jungkook quirks his eyebrows, "what's gotten into you? Shouldn't you be cram studying right now?" He says in a playful tone.

Taehyung shrugs. "I don't know, I just have a lot on my mind I guess."

Jungkook furrows his brows before getting up from his desk and walking towards the boy. He takes a seat beside him on the bed and then looks down to meet his gaze. "Whatta ya thinking about, hmm?"

Taehyung smiles and then rolls onto his back. "Just like...the future and stuff."

Jungkook smiles amusedly. "The future and stuff? Sounds like the title of a cringey Wattpad fanfic."

Taehyung shoots him a confused glance but Jungkook waves it off. "So tell me, what is it about this 'future and stuff' that has your head in the clouds?"

Taehyung chuckles lightly as he fiddles with his fingers. "I'm kind of scared," he says, voice barely above a whisper.

"Why?" Jungkook asks as he lays down next to the boy, the both of them now staring up at the blank ceiling.

"It's just...it's just so unknown. Like, I have no clue what I want to be yet, no aspirations. I don't know how my life is gonna look like, say, three years from now. It's scary. Everyone tells me that I have a bright future but...but all I see is darkness."

Jungkook turns his head slightly to stare at the smaller, watching the boy unconsciously fiddle with a small strand of his blue hair. "The future," he says, his voice smooth, a gentle ripple among the calm sea. "Isn't always going to be clear, and sadly, there's nothing we can do about that, that's life."

The ravenette lifts his hand and then mindlessly starts playing with a strand of Taehyung's hair himself. "But if you worry so much about the future to come, you'll forget to live in the present that's already here. You shouldn't let the fear of the unknown claim you, take over your mind and ruin the peace you live with. It's one thing to see the darkness, Bambi, but it's another to let it consume you."

Taehyung turns so that he faces him, his mouth slightly agape, eyes sparkling in awe.

"So screw the future. Right now is where it's at."

Taehyung's eyes crinkle as he laughs softly. "You never fail to amaze me, Jungkook."

Jungkook laughs and looks at him with that smug smile of his. "What can I say, I guess I was just born to be a star."

Taehyung doesn't whack him like usual, instead, he nods, eyes still glistening with that sense of awe he's been struck with. "Yeah..." he whispers, so quiet that the ravenette barely catches it. "Yeah, you are."

He then smiles warmly, "You know, Jungkook, there are so many stars in the sky; All so unique and beautiful." He reaches out and gently runs his hand over the small folds on the ravenette's forehead, easing them out.
"But I think... I think out of all of them, you're my favourite one."

And for Jungkook the words are so foreign to his ears; Not used to hearing such kindness directed at him without the intent of malice. He holds his breath and waits for the punch line. Waits for Taehyung to say he's joking, to call Jungkook a freak, to mock him and call him stupid for ever believing him. But the boy never does that. He just continues to stare at him with his big doe eyes and his gentle smile.

It makes Jungkook's heart do a little flip, the organ overwhelmed with this warmness that he's not used to; Never felt. He should love the feeling, after all, it feels amazing.

But he can't quite love it. Not when there's this horrible feeling of fear that lingers along with it

~

"How are we even going to study when his asshole of a roommate is going to be there? He might breathe down our necks the whole time," Hoseok whines as the group follows the blond-haired midget.

Jimin rolls his eyes, "if he breathes down our neck, we will breathe down his."

Jin chuckles unamusedly, "oh yeah, like he won't kill us for that. You say this now, Chim, but the minute you see him you drop from alpha to omega real fast."

Jimin spins around, stopping in his track, face contorted into annoyance. "I am always an alpha."

Namjoon sighs, "we live in a patriarchal society surrounded by an astounding imbalance of power and you're talking about fictitious roles from a story?"

Jimin blinks dumbly before pulling his phone out from his pocket. He types something up and then holds it in front of Namjoon. "Can you say that again," he says while holding google translate in front of the boy.

Namjoon sighs and ignores the male. Jinyoung chuckles and then pats Jimin's back. "You know, I agree with Jimin. It's also Taehyung's dorm so we shouldn't worry about his roommate, we're not there to see him."

Jimin nods, "yeah!"

Jin shakes his head, "No dude, you just haven't met this guy. He's like the coldest person alive."

Jinyoung frowns as he thinks back to the day he saw them in the kitchen.

Jungkook back hugs the small boy while whispering something into his ear, causing the smaller to giggle. The ravenette watches the smaller with fond eyes.

Jinyoung feels his eyes darken at the memory. "No, I think it should be fine if he's anything like when I last saw him."

The boys frown at the statement but Jinyoung brushes it off with a smile.

"Yeah, and plus, Taehyung said it was okay," Jimin urges. The group nod reluctantly and Jimin points to the dormitory building. "Let's go-"

"Wait-" A voice calls from behind them.

The boy's turn around to see a pale boy approaching them. Jimin narrows his eyes upon recognising the hooded figure. Min Yoongi. The boy who bullies Taehyung. Jimin grits his teeth, "What?" he seethes.

~

"No, I-I can!" Taehyung huffs, jutting his bottom lip out into a pout. Jungkook raises his brow, "I really doubt it, Tae. Your whole aura screams baby boy."

Neither of them really know how they got into the conversation about sex roles but here they are. One minute they were studying quartic functions and the next minute they are having a heated discussion (heated on Taehyung's side, Jungkook just found the whole ordeal amusing) on if or not Taehyung could be a top.

Taehyung shakes his head frantically, "N-NO!" He calls out defensively despite the blush painting his cheeks. "I can be a top."

Jungkook looks likes he's desperately trying to hold back his laughter before he finally let's go and bursts out laughing. He continues laughing as Taehyung whines at him to stop. "M-Maybe not a top b-but, maybe a power bottom," the smaller says quickly.

Jungkook urges himself to stop laughing and then wipes his tears away. "Sure thing," he states with amusement, obviously teasing the boy.

Taehyung jumps off the bed. "I'll prove it!" He shouts. Jungkook frowns, "No, Bambi, that's fine. I-I believe- HAHAHHA," he bursts into another fit of laughter, not being able to control himself.

Taehyung huffs out frustratedly and slightly stomps his foot. "I'll show you," he says, face hardened with determination.

Jungkook bites his lip to stop himself from laughing and then nods. "Mhm, go ahead, daddy."

Taehyung looks at him, horrified. "W-what?" He squeaks, eyes growing ever so big.

Jungkook tenses his jaw at the sight. The boy just looks too adorable. All he really wants to do is pull him in and kiss him all over.

Taehyung straightens his posture and clears his throat. "Ahem, y-yes. Now, u-um. Sit down," he tries to demand but his delicate voice makes it sound more like a plea.

"I'm already sitting, Bambi," Jungkooks says while amusedly raising his eyebrow.

Taehyung flushes cherry red and then clears his throat again. "Y-Yes, y-you take orders fast."

Jungkook purses his lips, channelling all his energy into not laughing. But then Taehyung does something that catches him off-guard. He takes his shirt off. Jungkook eyes the boy's bare chest and then looks back at him with a smirk.

He quirks his eyebrows up as he stares at the boy shyly squirming in his spot. Jungkook decides to tease him a little so he spreads his thighs and leans back against the bed, looking rather bored. He notices Taehyung look at him nervously and internally coos at the sight.

The smaller boy steps closer and hesitantly places his hands on Jungkook shoulders. Jungkook bites his lip but keeps his face rather expressionless.

~

Yoongi looks a little hesitant before he speaks. "Erm, I kinda overheard your conversation and heard that you are going to Jungkook's dorm? If so, could you give this to him?" He asks while handing over a pack of cigarettes.

"Uh, sure I gue-," Jin starts but is cut off by an angry blond.

"Absolutely not," He exclaims while glaring at the boy. "We will not be helping someone like you in any way."

Yoongi furrows his eyebrows, "what did I do?"

Jimin scoffs, "as if you don't know. Point is, we don't like you so we won't help you. Do it yourself."

Yoongi scoffs, "Jesus, calm your panties midget. I was just asking for a small favour, no need to act like some god."

Jimin is about to say something more but Jin grabs him. "Come on, Jimin, let's just go." He awkwardly turns back to the other boy who is now glaring holes into the back of the blond's head. "Uh, we're going there now so you can tag along I guess."

Yoongi continues to glare as he says, "yeah, whatever."

Jimin just increases his pace and marches into the dormitory building.

~

Taehyung is straddling Jungkook but to his dismay, the ravenette is not reacting in any way. He is just simply leaning back, acting like this isn't affecting him at all. On the other hand, Taehyung has a bright blush running through his features despite being the one who's supposedly the 'top' right now.

In reality, Jungkook is holding himself back from pouncing on the boy. The sight of the smaller's seductive curves and the feel of his plush ass rubbing against his thighs is driving him crazy but he's also thriving off of the frustrated pout the boy adorns when he gives him no reaction.

Taehyung leans in more and Jungkook leans back. The smaller boy frowns and places both his arms on his shoulder to hold him firmly in place. Taehyung opens his mouth to complain,

"Jungkook-"

But he's cut off.

Cut off by the sound of the door opening.

And in the next few moments, everything happens so quickly yet seems to play out in slow motion. The two boys stare, wide-eyed, at the group of boys at the door. Jimin holds the spare key-card loosely in his hands, letting it dangle freely as he stares back at them in absolute shock.

Jungkook stares at the boys and feels this horrible feeling churn in his gut. This darkness. This...fear. His face is calm but his mind is racing a million miles per second. His thoughts spiralling. His memories haunting.

"Shut up, fag," a boy from the back shouts, laughing along with his friends at the new word.

He can hear the mocking laughter of the kids, echoing in his head like some sort of broken record.

"Kookie must have got the fag disease from his dads. Oh my god, what if he gives it to us!"

He feels his body start to slightly tremble, his breath getting caught in his lungs.

"Why would I help a fag like you?"

There's this rush of anxiety within him, the same type he feels when there's a storm. He feels this fear that crawls up his body, controlling his thoughts.

And then, the little voice in the back of his head reminds him of the promise he made.

Never will he fall in love with another man.

His thoughts seem to spin into a flurry, so fast that he can barely think, he can barely feel.

And the only thing he can feel is that fear. The fear that now claws at his throat, constricting his airflow; Controlling him.

And before he can stop, he finds himself harshly pushing the smaller boy off his lap, causing him to fall onto the hard timbre floor with an aching thud.

His eyes burn into those big doe eyes as his spits out those poisonous words.

"Get off me, you fag."

And without a glance to spare he marches out of the room, pushing past the wide-eyed males standing in the doorway.

Taehyung remains frozen on that cold timbre floor, hearing the words repeat in his head over and over again. He can feel the heated gaze of his friends but he doesn't really care about that. All he can think of right now is Jungkook's eyes. Those eyes that were filled with anger, with hatred.

"Huh, so you really are a faggot?" Yoongi scoffs as he stares down at the boy on the floor. At this, Taehyung finds the courage to turn his head, to meet their eyes.

And what he see's is expected. They stare at him in horror, faces portraying their shock, their confusion, their disgust. He meets Jinyoung's gaze and see's that victorious smirk of his, his eyes maliciously mirthful.

Taehyung stares back at them with blank eyes, not bothering to offer and explanation. He didn't need to for he already knew; They wouldn't listen. They wouldn't care. All they see right now is the fact that Taehyung is a homosexual. A fag.

The group of boys slowly leave the room, avoiding contact with the boy on the ground. They all leave but one lingers a bit longer. Jimin. 

The blond walks up to the boy and looks down at him, the corners of his lips drooping into a frown.

"I told you to stay away from him," he says, voice coming out as a forced whisper. At that, Taehyung musters up the courage to look up at him.

He had expected it but the sight still leaves a dull sting in his heart. The sight of those usually warm honey eyes staring at him with disgust, with loathing. The usual compassion held in his soft features had now faded into bitter dislike.

He doesn't say anything to him because he feels too ashamed. He just drops his head and listens as the boy slowly walks away, leaving him behind in that suffocating room.

The door slams shut and there is silence. Taehyung breathes softly, feeling his heart beat numbly in his chest. And then, out of nowhere, he starts laughing.

He laughs hard, his breath leaving his body as he heaves over and laughs. He laughs so hard that tears stream down his cheeks. Laughs so hard that his face flushes red and he chokes on his spit.

He doesn't know when his laughter turns into heart-wrenching sobs. He just remembers curling up into a ball and letting his thoughts consume him, not realising as his body shakes with each sorrowful cry.

He cries so hard that soon, no tears come out. He's left hiccuping, body numb, heart sore.

He finds his mind drifting back to the words from his bible studies class.

"Lust is when you crave someone's body. Love is when you crave their heart."

And as he thinks about that raven-haired boy that is haunting his thoughts he laughs again, weakly, humourlessly. He laughs because it is then that he realises the answer to the question that has been bugging him for days.

Love. It wasn't lust it was love. 

He knew because right now, Taehyung was craving Jungkook's heart and nothing else.

But Taehyung should have known. Should have understood. Should have realised;
Realised that he was the only one craving for his heart. 

Realised that this so-called love was one-sided.

-

A/N: Uhh, haha, hi. 

...

I feel like I should reassure you guys in some way after throwing that at you so um, just remember that every relationship is like a roller coaster. There are ups and downs, highs and lows. If relationships were a straight line they would be quite dull, wouldn't they? 

... ^^ me trying to do damage control 😅😂 (Also, this chapter was the hardest fcking chapter to write in this book. Idk why it just was. I'm sorry if it feels poorly written :(  )

Now I have to ask because I'm curious, who in this book is your least favourite character? 

P.S I love you guys ❤️