I drink the last drop of my bottle. Unlike my boyfriend's drink, it's whiskey.

"DoN't YoU tHiNk ThAt'S mOtHeRfUcKiN eNoUgH?" He asks, worried slightly. I was sitting while he was standing. My eyes feel heavy as I nod. I try to stand up and stumble into Gamzee's arms. "I'm f-fine," I slur. I hate it when I slur, because I know I can still articulate perfect thoughts. "ArE yOu SuRe?" I jerk my head and get off of him. I can't be near him like this. I stumble with my empty bottle and go to the kitchen to throw it away. God, I'm acting like Rose.

I hate this feeling, but I need the drink. I try to get over to the fridge, I need a new bottle. I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Y/n," Gamzee said in a slightly growl of a voice. "No MoRe." I shove his hand off me and open the door. He didn't stop me. There is no way to stop me as a drunk. "Gam-Gam, don't tell me what to do. I can make the right cho... choices." I take a swig of the drink. It left a bitter, addictive taste in my mouth. Gamzee gently leads me back to the couch. "Y/n, PlEaSe," He begs. "PlEaSe StOp." He stares into my eyes, his with growing tears and mine with the dullest look imaginable. "I-I can't," I say. This was from the whole of my heart.

I start sobbing. "I-I can't get rid of it." The stupid addiction only grows with every day, making me feel stupid and calm. I can't afford to be calm, I need my other emotions. I sob harder and curl into a ball. Snot and tears run all over my face, but I can't care, in my mind nor in the drunken stupor. Gamzee holds me in his lap, brushing his hand through my hair and humming softly. I hold onto his shirt and hiccup. I was still crying, but this time softer. The bottle was on the other side of the couch, away from us so we wouldn't knock it over. I feel an urgency in my body, telling my hand to reach of the bottle. It complies and Gamzee holds onto it. "Y/n, FiGhT iT." He nuzzles into my hair and I felt water- no, tears drip into it. "FoR mE." I nod my hand and make my hand retreat. "YoU dOn'T nEeD iT." He lets go of me and slides me off. He takes the bottle. "G-gamzee?" I hiccup. What will he do? He walks to the kitchen and takes the rest of the bottles, basically emptying 3/4 of it. He opens all the caps and I gasp. He poured all of the liquid down the drain. I felt my tears come back and I curl up again. Inside I am ecstatic, on the outside I cry. He rushes over to me and quietly shushes me. "YoU cAn GeT mOtHeRfUcKiN tHrOuGh ThIs," He whispers and holds me by my shoulders. I nod childishly and hiccup again. "I lOvE yOu AnD i NeEd YoU. bUt YoU cAn'T dO tHiS tO yOuR mOtHeRfUcKiN bOdy." I nod again and he looks into my eyes again. Both us were crying, his tears purple and mine clear. He carefully places a kiss on my foe head and I put my head against his chest. 

We sit there for a while before I was in the half-asleep, half-dead state. Gamzee picks me up like a bride and carries me to our bedroom. He laid me down on the bed and laid right next to me. I heard him murmur once more that he loved me and curled his arms around me. Stars from the window nearby lit Gamzee's face up. His face was tired and calm, his hair messy and sprawling all over the pillow. I look up to the stars. 'Please,' I beg silently to them. 'Please help me get rid of this.' The stars twinkled and I slowly close my eyes. I just want to stop, but I feel as if I need it. But I need Gamzee more. 

I choose Gamzee. I will do this for Gamzee.