"Damn." You mutter to yourself, crossing your arms in front of your chest. "He must be at work or something. Maybe I should've done this yesterday."

Standing in front of Legoshi's room, you let out a long sigh.

The day before, you and the wolf had spent the evening with Zaguan the spotted seal; an interesting individual that is as wise as he is strange. Though at the end of the evening, you had grown to like him a lot. Initially, your plan had been to confront Legoshi on the way back to your guys' separate apartments but that plan backfired when the exhaustion of the day finally caught up to you and you nearly fell asleep right then and there. It didn't help that you constantly kept your eyes closed due to the seal's nudity and while you started dozing off, the wolf was still wide awake as he listened to Zaguan's stories of the sea.

Eventually, you wished them a good night and headed back to your apartment. You actually tripped on the stairs and nearly split your head open too, solely because your body decided to peace out and leave you alone with your relationship problems. Then you collapsed onto your futon and embraced the soothing darkness not long after.

When you woke up, got ready and proceeded to knock onto your partner's door, you didn't receive an answer. Like expected, because for some reason this stupidly tall wolf was almost constantly out of your reach since the two of you left school. Maybe this is some higher power's way of telling you to drop it and just move on from your life, though you can't imagine that to be healthy for your relationship at all. But with no indication that he's just hiding from you in his room, you conclude that he has either gone to work or left the complex for something else.

Rubbing your temples to rid yourself of the pressure this continuing dispute between you two is putting on your shoulders, you decide to come back another time. Or maybe you should just use reverse psychology and simply stop searching for him. After all, the times that you did run into him during the past few days only happened when he didn't occupy your mind at all.

Yup. Seems like solid logic.

You make your way back to your apartment and promptly busy yourself with unpacking your duffel bag, stashing away your stuff whilst the time flies by slower than Louis can come up with a dramatic monologue. The thought of the one-legged stag throws you down a nostalgic ride of memory lane and you wonder how he's doing at the moment. After all, he had left school at the beginning of summer to deal with his whole 'I am a weak herbivore and I can't stand that' spiel. You're still a little salty over the fact that he joined the gang that nearly killed you as well but seeing as they also gave you a place to stay and basically treated you like one of their own when you needed it the most, your grudge against the felines is now basically non-existent.

After some time spent thinking, you send the stag a text, asking how he's fairing in life. It only seems fair, as amputee-buddies.

It doesn't take long for you to be left with an empty bag. A sigh leaves you lips as you glance around your small apartment, a wave of pride rolling over you at the little safe-space you've created for yourself. Frankly, you never thought you'd get this far, but life is full of unexpected twists and turns that change all plans.

For example, you never thought you'd get shot and die at such a young age. You never thought you'd end up in another world, fall in love and take part in things no teenager should ever need to face, such as crimelords, crazy scientists and a murderer. The cards the universe has dealt you are truly peculiar and you really hope you've reached the end of this insane rollercoaster.

You're not sure you can handle another low-point. There's only so much the human brain can deal with before it shuts down completely and you don't want to find out where your limits lie. Rather, you'd indulge yourself in the sweet, honey-coated lie that is called ignorance.

All too suddenly, your small room seems unbearably suffocating, too cramped for comfort. It's no hard task to recognize the growing anxiety in your chest, the lump in your throat that seems to hinder you from breathing. Drawing short, hacky breaths that would worry any doctor, you grab your keys and jacket before leaving your place behind.

The hidden Condo has a rooftop, that much you remember from the little tour you'd gotten before you moved in. And due to living on the top floor, you don't have that many stairs left to climb. It's a perfect place to catch your breath, a saving grace in a dark abyss.

"Good day, Y/n."

"Ah!"

Zaguan's sudden appearance startles you, a shriek leaving your lips as flashes of far more sinister enemies of yours burn themselves into your brain. It brings tears to your eyes, ones that you can keep from falling but you still lean onto your doorframe, drawing a trembling breath.

"Excuse me," The seal muses, his face showing his concern for your state, "I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it's alright." You huff, your intake of oxygen still irregular as you place a hand above your heart. "I just...didn't see you there."

He hums, still apologetic. You're just glad he's wearing clothes this time, honestly. "If you don't mind me asking, where are you off to?"

"Hm? Oh, the rooftop." You muster a polite smile. "Wanted to get some fresh air after being cooped up in my room all day."

The seal smiles and you can't get over how cute it is. "Really? I had the same plan. Do you mind if we go together?"

You shake your head no, even though you'd rather be alone. However, you'd feel rude by declining his offer and so you simply roll with it, seeing as the seal isn't that bad to be around. Evidently in no rush at all, Zaguan matches your pace and joins you in your journey to the rooftop. Neither of you say a word; not that it matters. The silence is enjoyable for once, peaceful and calm with zero traces of awkwardness or that would have you desperate for any form of conversation. It's only when you're nearly at the door leading to the roof that the seal speaks again, his tone one of curiosity.

"Sorry if this is too bold," He begins, "but how long have you and Legoshi been partners?"

"Ah, let me think. It's sort of complicated because we were separated for quite some time in between that. So you can say that we first got together half a year ago, right at the height of summer. After about two months, he decided to end our relationship. We got back together a little while before New Year's Eve." Letting out a sigh, you do the math in your head. "So in all honesty, we've only been romantically involved with one another for about three months in total."

Again, the seal lets out a wistful hum. "I take it you two have been through some troubled times then?"

A small frown grows on your face. "Yes, you could say that."

"Don't let it discourage you. When you are young, it is hard to shoulder both love and the journey to find yourself and your place in life." In an attempt to comfort you, he places his hand on your shoulder. "As long as your feelings for one another are true, you can overcome all storms in unity."

You're stunned for a moment. Not only because he doesn't pry any further like most people would, but also because his advice is spot on. "Thanks, Zaguan. I'll keep your words in mind."

He smiles at you, brightly and with a sense of wisdom and tranquillity that only resides in the depths of the ocean. And finally, the two of you have reached the roof. Though it seems you're not the only ones with the bright idea to get some air, judging from the voices ringing through the door.

One of them is undoubtedly familiar and you furrow your brows in minor confusion. But before you can dwell on it, Zaguan opens the door and you follow him around the corner like a child follows their parent around the grocery store.

"I knew that voice was you, Legoshi."

"Huh?"

"Oh! Zaguan!"

Peering around the tall body of the seal, you're faced with the sight of the surprised grey wolf standing beside a little female sheep. It feels like you've seen her face before, though the memory seems lost to you at the moment. She doesn't invoke any jealousy in you either, even though nearly all teen dramas would urge you to despise her solely for standing near your boyfriend. But she looks as though she's in her thirties and on the edge of a mid-life crisis, so you doubt she's interested in catching herself a carnivore that's more than ten years younger than her.

And if she was, then Legoshi's respect for the elderly is far too great for him to reciprocate any sort of advances.

"I'm glad you have your clothes on..." Legoshi murmurs when you and the seal join the pair, his dark eyes flickering to you more often than not as he catches sight of you. Then he introduces you to the sheep. "Sebun, meet Zaguan and Y/n."

"A pleasure to meet you. I am the spotted seal from the room 302." Zaguan greets and you follow suit, sending a shy wave her way. "And I'm the human, I live in room 603. It's nice to meet you."

"Sebun? Like the number seven? Lucky seven! What a nice name." The seal cheers, his arms rising into the air and bringing a grin to your lips. Once more, you're grateful for his presence and that it destroys all sorts of tension and awkwardness in the blink of an eye. Legoshi's tail wags behind him as he sees Zaguan's instantaneous, friendly approach, his ears flopping sideways. "I'll go get you some drinks."

While he disappears, the sheep frowns. "Geez...I can't believe I'm drinking while I'm on vacation. Sorry you have to see me like this."

She turns to face you. "Especially you. I shouldn't be setting a bad example for the young people of the hidden Condo. First Legoshi and now you!"

You sweatdrop at her distraught face and in an attempt to ease the pressure on her shoulders, you wave her off. "Oh no, please don't worry about that. I really don't mind, I doubt Legoshi does either. Besides, if you're on vacation...wouldn't now be a better time to drink and relax, rather than during work days?"

The sheep sighs. "That's true, too."

Not a moment later, the wolf returns with two cups in hand. There's no alcohol in it, just some really tasty juice and you're grateful for that. You're barely capable of handling your mess of a mind whilst being sober, it'd be chaos if you actually did consume alcohol. Not that the wolf would be the type of person to offer someone alcohol, seeing as he's underage, just like you.

And as the small sheep lady begins to rant about her carnivore colleagues from work, with Zaguan adding a phrase of wisdom and clarity every now and then, you come to terms with the fact that your little mission to get some alone time on the roof have gone up in flames. Though in hindsight, it might be better that way.

Maybe being alone is the last thing you need in moments like that.

It's easier to forget your own troubles when you're surrounded by laughter and people who all have their own burdens to carry.

When the moon takes its place in the sky as the sun lays itself to rest and you have to bid the day farewell, Sebun is the first to leave the frigid air and return to her room to head to bed. An hour after her, Zaguan wishes you a goodnight before disappearing as well.

Leaving only you and Legoshi.

The shy, scarred and stubborn wolf. Your wolf. One you haven't been properly communicating with for quite some time now.

Illuminated by the silver rays of moonlight, the two of you are trapped in awkward silence. Both of you know what you need to talk about, the conversation that's been left in the air for far too long, yet neither of you know how to start. The sounds of the city and roaming animals on the streets below merge with the serene melody of the cold wind that bites at the exposed parts of your skin while you hold onto your half-empty cup of juice. Meanwhile, Legoshi's hands are buried in his jacket, his tail gently swaying back and forth.

"So," You begin, drawing out your words in hopes of hiding your lack of a plan, "When were you going to tell me you dropped out?"

Leaning back against the railing of the roof, he cowers slightly beside you and a frown settles on your shivering lips at that. After all, both of you kept that secret from one another.

"I...I don't know. I didn't know how." Legoshi finally says dejectedly, his ears hanging low at the sides of his head.

"Yeah." A sigh leaves you, a cloud of fog appearing. "Me neither."

"I wanted to tell you though!" He quickly adds, turning to face you with guilty eyes, ones that cause your heart to ache. "But I didn't know how to bring it up. I thought you'd stay with Louis and the others and if I told you, I'd make you sad. And after everything that happened, I just wanted you to be happy."

Heat rises into your face and you nearly forget that it's the middle of winter. Familiar warmth erupts in your chest while a smile blossoms on your face, a short laugh escaping you. Without warning, you let your body lean against his taller one, your head resting against the side of his arm as he tenses at the sudden contact.

"You're such a dork sometimes, Legoshi."

He chuckles lightly at that, a sound that vibrates through your own body and reminds you just how much you've missed this. Then, silence falls between you once more, though you know the question that lies on the very tip of his tongue.

"What about you?" He finally asks, his voice portraying how nervous he is. "When were you going to tell me?"

"I don't know. It never felt right until now." You say in all honesty. "Truthfully, I kind of wanted to do it at the start of school. I thought that if I told you before that, you'd either worry yourself to death or drop out too to keep an eye on me. And I didn't want that for you. I want you to make your own choices for yourself and not because you feel like you need to protect me or anything like that, especially important ones like dropping out of school."

Once more, you sigh. Though this one is relieved; happy to finally have this burden off your chest.

"Seems like the both of us wanted to protect each other. " Legoshi mutters, his wagging tail gently hitting against your leg. You nod, burying your head further against his warm body. With a smile, you let out another large exhale that turns into a foggy cloud. "It's quite the troublesome habit for us, ain't it?"

"You could say that."

The stars twinkle above you as you slowly bring one of your hands to the pocket of his jacket and skilfully fish out his hand, immediately intertwining your fingers. His natural body heat as a wolf is honestly better than any glove you've ever had.

"Let's make a promise." You propose. "Let's be honest with each other. Even if we think the other person won't be happy with it. In the end, it's a lot better to talk things out like this rather than keeping secrets. Okay?"

He nods, an adorable smile on his face. Then, he glances down at your hands before curling his fingers around your smaller one; an act that brings butterflies to your stomach. "Okay."

You stare at your hands for a moment longer, taking in the sight of his glimmering grey fur beneath the moonlight. Lifting your head upwards, you look up into the starlit sky; all your worries of the day have been washed away, like little shards of glass on a beautiful beach.

At that moment, you realize something rather trivial.

"You know, I still haven't shown you my apartment."

Dark eyes gleaming in the night, he turns to you. "Huh....You're right."

***

Hello Homies!

It is I! I'm not dead (somehow)!

Also, happy new year!

No seriously, with how fucked my immune system has been for the past two months, I'm just grateful I didn't catch you know what. First my ear was fucked (cause otitis media), then my stomach was fucked (reacted badly to the antibiotics for the otitis media) and then my whole body was fucked (cause I got glandular fever).

That topped with work was a whole fucking mess. So yeah, I'm coping. And finally back on wattpad. I really want to get back to a regular update schedule.

By the way, I am moving the weekly updates back to Sundays, cause that's just easier to organize and achieve for me.

On another note, I'm enjoying my work, which is for a voluntary social year in a kindergarten that also cares for disabled children. The kids are really loving and cute as hell but sometimes I do feel like a mother hen and want to punch these damned parents for making choices that end up hurting their kids a lot more than they think. For example, we have a three year old child of divorce in our group and her self-esteem is non-existent now because she thinks her dad wanted to be away from her because he moved out. And while I do understand that divorce is most often better for everyone involved, people really need to learn how to properly convey to your kids that they aren't the problem.

But on a happier note, I've fallen down the genshin impact rabbit hole during my time of sickness. At first, I didn't want to play because I'm usually not one for games, but this one peaked my interest because my two sisters play as well and well...it's a game full of waifus. I joined the game solely because I'm a massive simp for these women, like holy hell. And honestly, it's been fun to play and is super impressive for a free game.

Onto the chapter, we met Sebun, my favourite sheep! Love her, not gonna lie. And I honestly do feel like Zaguan would be the wise uncle next door who just gives wonderful life advice. And yeah, we finally mended the gap between Y/n and Legoshi.

Anyways, that's it from me for now. Stay safe everyone.

See you in the next chapter!