"Good morning my love," I hear my boyfriend,Tommy whisper in my ear.

I shoot straight up, "Tommy, I'm leaving today."

"I know cutie," he sighs. "That's why I'm here to take you to the train station."

We ride to the train station in silence, all I can think about is going back to Tulsa and leaving behind my one good life I've had all my life. Am I making the right choice or should I stay? What if my brothers don't want me back in there life? What if they haven't forgiven me yet for leaving? What if they are still hurting from me leaving? What if I don't make it in Tulsa?

After what feels like days of panic attacks we arrive and he hands me my bags kissing me one last time and saying, "Basil Leaf Curtis, I love you."

I look at him and cry out, "Tommy James Horseman, I love you too."

"Whatever you do, don't start dating another guy and completely forget about me, let me have an impact on your life," he pleads.

"Tommy, that'll never happen, you turned my life around and taught me what, trust, love, loyalty, hope, faith and friendship means. I will never forget you," I sob.

"Well Basil, when you love someone set them free and I'm setting you free to live your life, hopefully filled with joy," he cries too.

"And I set you free to live your life, not because I want to but, because I love you," I reply.

"Please don't forget what love is, don't forget what I taught you, find love some where other than in me and be happy," he says smiling through his tears.

"And don't you let me ruin your life," I say hugging him.

"I promise," he says.

"And I promise you," I cry.

He wipes away my tears, "don't cry love. Everything will be okay."

"I'm just going to miss you so much," I say trying to get a hold of myself.

"I know but, your going home to meet your family once again, your brothers," he says. Then he hands me a small box whispering, "open it."

I slowly opened the box exposing a ring, it was promise rings but why. Why is giving this to me, I might never see him again? Didn't he just tell me to find love with somebody else? I looked at him baffled stuttering, "w-what is this f-f-for?" 

"It's a promise ring, promise you'll never forget me, promise you'll always remember me, that you'll move on but, never forget the love we share," he says crying.

"Oh Tommy,of course, I won't I love you so much," I respond also crying.

"Then go home Basil," he smiles through his sobs.

"Goodbye Tommy," I say kissing him for the last time.

"Goodbye Basil Leaf," he says ushering me onto the train. I sit down and watch as I leave my home and my boyfriend. I pull my knees up to my chest, cuff my face into my hands and silently sob. I know this is for the best but, I just left the guy I love most in the world. I'll never forget him, I'll never love again. He's the person who broke down my walls and exposed the true Basil Leaf Curtis and now he's gone along with everything else I've grown to love. I runaway from my problems but, for the first time in my life, I'm just running for no problem, not even a real reason, just running. I'm running back to the place that started my run that built my walls and where I took my first breathe of air. The only thing is even I don't get why. Why am I doing this to myself and to the people I love? I shouldn't of done this, I should of never gotten on this train. God why am I so stupid?

*********

I finally get off the train, walking slowly up to the place I used to call my home, I stare through the window to see Darry, Sodapop, Ponyboy, and the rest of the gang plus one guy I've never seen before he must be new. I hesitantly knock on the door. Sodapop answers it and mutters, "oh my gosh, my twin sister."

"Oh my gosh, I can't believe you remember me!" I squeal running into his arms.

He hugs me back whispering, "how could I forget?"

We slowly walk in and the moment I see Ponyboy I run into his arms, he might be my kid brother but, I've always acted more like the kid sister. As soon as he released who I was he hugged me back and I felt a few tears slide down his face. I whisper into his ear, "oh Pone, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for leaving you here. I love you Pone, I really do."

"I know sis'. I love you too, I've missed you so much," he says fighting through tears.

I pull away from Pony staring into his eyes. I then look over to Darry, we didn't end on good terms. This could be bad.

I walk into the house, drunk, banged up, and late for curfew. It was a few months after my parents died, I was fourteen and just came back from a wild party. "Basil Leaf Curtis, where have you been?" Darry screamed through out the house.

"Dar, I was just having fun," I slurred, laughing a little at the end then going to walk in and falling on my ass.

"Basil, were you at another party?" He screamed looking into my glazed eyes.

"No, and if I was I ain't stupid enough to tell you," I laughed.

"You know what if you're going to act like this then you can just do us all a favor and get our, we'll be better off without you!" He screamed showing me the door.

"Fine! Maybe I will. Is that really what you want though?" I ask him angrily with clenched teeth.

I ran upstairs grabbing my stuff, I looked at Sodapop and Ponyboy kissing both of their heads. I walked out of the room slightly crying. Then I stormed downstairs when Darry kicked me out, I sobered up fast. I looked at him dead in the eyes yelling, "I HATE YOU DARREL CURTIS! I FUCKING HATE YOU!" As I yelled that I saw something in his eyes, I've never seen before, it looked like guilt, he opened up his mouth but, I ran out of the house and never looked back. I didn't know where I was going or how I was going to get there but, I knew I needed to leave.

I looked at Darry, he had the same look on his face, the day I left. His hands were stuffed in his pockets, his head was down but, his eyes were glued to my face, he was slightly swaying and his shoulders were crunched up closer to each other. I walked over to him as I said, "I love you Darry, I didn't mean what I said."

As I said that tears start streaming down his face, "I love you too Basil, I'm sorry for that night."

I then looked over at the gang and yelled, "that's right I'm back baby, and I'm ready to scream it to the world and kick Soc's ass!" The gang started laughing as I ran outside yelling on the top of my lungs, "BASIL LEAD CURTIS IS BACK BABY! YEA THAT'S RIGHT I'M BACK BABY AND READY TO WIN MY TURF BACK!"

"It's good to see ya Basil," Steve said, as he hugged me.

"Damn boy, you've gone soft," I teased.

"Did not," he argued.

"Whatever loser," I jokes running over to Two-bit.

"MINNIE!" He yells, we dated before I left. He called me Minnie and, I called him Mickey. Even after we broke up, he called me Minnie and I still call him mickey.

"MY BESTIE MICKEY!" I yell back bringing him into a warm, long, lingering hug.

"Now's whose gone soft," Steve muttered bitterly.

"He's my ex it's different," I argue rolling my eyes playfully.

"Hey Johnnycakes, how you been?" I ask coolly, it's always been the way we talked.

"Good, you?" He asked puffing out a perfect ring out smoke.

"I've been better but, I'm great now," I reply smiling at the gang. My eyes shoot to the new guy who's staring at my boobs. I looked at him then taunted, "you can look but, you can't touch." I do a cute little spin to tease him.

"You must not know me, I'm Dallas Winston," he winksl

I laughed at his pathetic pick up line, "if you want me you gotta work harder than that. Let me guess, you're cocky, have girls chasing your feet, you're a player that all the girls want, you then break their heart, you're cold, emotionless, and a bad boy. Well guess what, you're not breaking my heart and this might damage you stupid ego but, I'll never fall for an ass like you."

The gang all looks at me than Dallas who was now running his hands through his hair.

"Girl you have no idea who you're talking to," Dallas tells me.

"No Dallas, you have no idea who you're talking to and you should really learn because, sure you're a bad boy but, I'm a bad ass bitch with an armor made of steel," I smile.

I walk upstairs to my old room, nothing was moved minus my clothing. I lay down on my soft bed, that still has my stuffed brown dog my parents gave me before they died. It's a light brown dog that lays flat with hard black eyes and nose. As I plop down on bed I hug it tight and let a few tears slip out of my eyes. I soon hear a knock on the door and I manage to pull myself together enough to say, "come in."

To no surprise it was Soda, "hey Basil, it's weird isn't it, a lot of old memories."

"Yea, I know," I sigh.

"You know it's weird, at times you seem so happy to be back but, at others you seem like you just lost everything all over again," Soda says.

"I know, it's just complicated," I inform him

"Well, tell me twin," he smiles.

"Sodapop, do you remember how close we were?" I ask looking him in his eyes.

"Yes, I do when we were younger we used to run around the house yelling super twins. Then when we stopped that. You used to follow me around like a lost puppy dog, you even had a crush on Steve because he was my best friend. Then, up until our parents died, I used to carry you on my back. Once our parents died, I don't know what happened to you, you were in and out of jail, always either drunk off you ass or higher than a mother fucker, you never knew what you were doing or saying, Darry and I were afraid of letting you near the gang or Ponyboy. You were always getting into fights, you would go out partying every night, come home late, there were nights you wouldn't come back. Darry never knew if you out drunk, high, or even dead. He was always worried about you, there were times we wanted to send you to a girls home. You would yell at me and Darry 24/7 we used to yell at you because you would bring guys home you never even met before. We were terrified, when you were out of it. Then one night Darry had enough, I heard Darry scream 'You know what if you're going to act like this then you can just do us all a favor and get our, we'll be better off without you!' The next thing I knew was you came into mine and Pony's room, you kissed both of us on the forehead and for the first time in months I saw my real sister, you were even crying a little bit, you weren't drunk or high. Then I heard you scream, 'I HATE YOU DARREL CURTIS! I FUCKING HATE YOU!'. The last thing I heard was the door slam I knew you were gone but, I also knew you've been gone for months at that point. I looked over to a woken up Ponyboy with tears streaming down his face. I wanted to run after you but, I knew you had to leave for your health. I thought you were dead somewhere on the street or hooking with some boy or getting high or drunk somewhere. I didn't know but, a year after you left I gave up hope on you coming back. The last picture I have of us two you were high in and you were mad at me in the picture but, I treasured it. I tried to only remember the good but, my dreams haunted me with the bad. We didn't have the will to take apart your room so we donated your clothing. The nights any one of us would miss you we'd sleep in your bed, I used to go months sleeping in this room some nights Pone joined but, it was mostly Darry. We used to sit there looking at pictures of us, crying. We didn't tell Pony any of this. We thought we lost you, mom, and dad, in less then four months which we kind of did. When I saw you, I was so happy to see you back," Sodapop explained and once we got to the part about me after the death he was crying. The sad part is I didn't remember any of it, it was all just one big blur to me.

"I-I was r-r-really that b-b-bad," I stuttered shocked.

"Yea," he sighed.

"Golly, I'm so sorry Sodapop, but I promise to be the twin you love," I smile.

"I know you will," he replies laying next to me wrapping his arms protectively around me. I'm happy I'm back, as least I think I am. I lay next to him soaking in the fact that I have my family back plus that Dallas guy before sleepily mumbling, "goodnight, twin I love you."

"I love you too, twin goodnight," he replied. After that I slowly drifted into a deep sleep.