Louis thankfully sleeps the entire night, he doesn't stir once, the pain killers really helping him get a good rest.

Harry and Scott slept either side of Louis and made sure he was okay all night. Having Louis next to them both, in their bed, at their own place, was the best feeling in the world, despite the circumstances.

Harry and Scott get up around seven, they shower and make breakfast just in time for the boys to turn up.

They all greet each other fondly with hugs, and sit down to breakfast at the table in the kitchen. Louis still fast asleep.

"So he had a good night then?" Andy confirms with the boys.

"He's been fast asleep since we got him home, those pain killers are good stuff" Harry chuckles

"He's on some pretty strong ones, I spoke to Casey last night" Andy tells them.

"Yeah, she said she wanted Louis to rest as much as possible, his kidney infection would be knocking him around" Scott tells them.

"He was lucky they found it as early as they did". Andy says:

The boys dig into their food and it goes quiet while they eat, the boys have being travelling for most of the night and they are hungry,

"So has he said anything about what's been going on?" Drew asks halfway through breakfast.

"We haven't really gotten a chance to talk to him about it all" Harry replies as he leans back in his chair.

"I think everything is going to start coming to a head and we should all be prepared for that" Edward then pipes up and says.

"How do you mean?" Drew asks.

"Louis has been keeping his feelings bottled up for years, he's pushed everything away and in the space of two months, he's opened up to Scott and Harry, he's been abused at work, he's had his work stolen and now has to go through a legal battle to get what's rightfully his, he's ended up in hospital as a result and he's been left without a job and one of the biggest things he's needed, security" Edward says.

The boys all look to each other worriedly

"I have Kim on standby, we've been talking the last month" Andy says, referring to Louis psychologist he was seeing after the accident.

"Well maybe it's a good thing It's all coming to a head, he really needs to start talking and opening up" Drew says.

"Yeah but he needs our support, we need to make sure we're here for him. Facing his feelings is going to be hard on him after all this time" Andy says.

"Well we aren't going anywhere" Harry tells the boys.

"Are you both serious about him?" Drew asks

"So serious, we want to be with him" Scott says.

"He's ours and we won't let a single thing come between us" Harry urges.

The boys smirk fondly at each other, grateful Louis has Harry and Scott by his side.

They then sense movement and turn to see Louis walking out of Harry and Scott's bedroom. He looks tired with his hair going in different directions, his pyjamas falling off him, he looks so small and innocent. His bruised cheek is on full display and the boys hearts break at the sight of him.

"Lou" Drew says and he is out of his seat racing towards Louis.

Louis falls into Drew's arms and clings to him for dear life.

"It's okay kiddo, I've got you, you're okay" Drew tells him, Louis relaxes in Drew's arms and just lets Drew hold him close.

When Louis pulls back he wipes his eyes

"Sorry" Louis says as he tries to pull himself together.

"For what? You don't need to apologise for anything bud, I'm always here for you" Drew says.

Louis looks at his brother, Drew has always been there, right next to Louis, his whole life and Louis feels the immense guilt set in and the doom in the pit of his stomach gets ten times worse.

"Well you shouldn't have to be there for me all the time" Louis says with slight anger to his tone.

Louis doesn't know why he's reacting with anger, he doesn't want the boys to be so nice to him, they are always so loving and kind and Louis doesn't deserve any of it.

"We are always going to be there for you kid" Andy says as he and the others make their way to the lounge.

"Are you okay?" Edward asks, his tone so soft and loving.

Louis looks at Edward in the eyes and his breathing gets slightly heavy. No, he's not okay, and he doesn't know if or when he will be.

"Why, do you even care if I'm okay?" Louis then asks upset.

The boys look to each other before looking back to Louis.

"Because we're your brothers and we love you" Andy tells him.

"Well you shouldn't love me, none of you should, you should forget about me as your brother" Louis half yells.

He doesn't know why he's acting like this but the ache in his chest is getting too much for him. Getting hurt and having to go to the hospital, everything that's happened. Moving to London was supposed to be his escape, Louis new start, but he can't escape what is meant for him, a life of loneliness and being treated like he doesn't matter, like he's worthless.

"How's about we just take some deep breaths and go lie down kiddo, you're going to be in pain and you need some more pain relief" Andy tries.

"I don't want to go lie down, I want to go back to my place and I want you all to leave and and forget about me" Louis says as a few tears escape.

"That's not going to happen Lou, we aren't going anywhere, we will be here for you, always" Drew tells him.

"Why can't you just let it go, why can't you just hate me, you should hate me" Louis yells then.

"Why would we hate you Lou?" Edward asks.

"Nothing you could ever do would make us hate you kiddo" Andy tells him.

"I killed our parents! how is that not a reason to hate me, I killed them and you still raised me and you still call me and text me every night, you still shower me with your love and your kindness and you still found out I was hurt and flew across the country in less than 12 hours and I just don't get it, I don't understand" Louis says as he gets worked up.

Harry and Scott come further into the room, just enough to show Louis they are there if he needs but not interfering at all.

"Louis, you didn't kill mum and dad" Drew tells Louis sternly.

Louis looks at Drew, his chest heaving.

"You don't even know Drew, you don't even know what happened" Louis shouts. His body is aching, he's so sore but he needs to get this all off his chest, it's consuming him.

"Then tell us, Louis, tell us what happened" Edward pleads.

"Mum and dad wanted to go home but I made them go to one last house, I made them. They would have been alive if I didn't, if we'd just gone home" Louis chokes.

"Oh bud, that's not your fault at all" Edward says.

"They didn't die on impact, they were awake and alive for three hours after we crashed. I couldn't get out of the car it was covered in snow. They were stuck and dying and....they gave me their warm coasts. I only survived because I had them. If they had have kept them they would have survived......I killed them and you should hate me, I left you parentless because I was selfish and asked for one more house" Louis tells them, his emotions everywhere.

The room is deathly quiet, as the boys take in the information. They really aren't sure how Louis can think this is all his fault.

"You've been holding onto that secret for four years, because you thought we would hate you and we would blame you?" Drew asks his voice calm and steady and Louis looks up surprised.

"You should blame me" Louis says, his voice unsteady.

"You were a child Louis, asking for one more house, that's was what we all used to do and mum and dad being who they were, would always give us what we wanted" Edward says. 

"Their injuries, although they may not have died on impact, were not survivable. Them giving you their jackets saved your life kiddo, but it didn't end theirs" Andy tells him.

"You're just saying that" Louis says angrily.

"No, we're not, we wouldn't do that to you, what happened was an accident, a tragic accident and they did what any parent would in that circumstance, they did everything they could to save you" Drew says.

"Then why, do I feel so guilty, why didn't I die too" Louis asks.

"Because it's all part of grieving Louis, survivors guilt is something that you have to work through but you need to allow yourself to work through it" Andy tells him.

"Punishing yourself and keeping us at arms length isn't working through it, you don't deserve to live in guilt kid, this isn't your fault and it was never your fault" Edward says.

"Why did you really leave Holmes Chapel Louis? Was it really because there were more opportunities in London?" Drew asks sadly.

He knows Louis left because he couldn't take the pain of losing their parents but it's making a lot more sense that he felt like he couldn't tell them the truth, that he's been feeling this guilt this whole time and Drew hates that he couldn't see it, that he chose to allow Louis to leave and to carry this weight for four years.

Louis sits on the floor, he's so sore and and can't keep himself standing upright much longer. The boys instantly follow suit, so they are on the same level as Louis. Andy and Edward lean against the couch, while Drew sits closer to Louis.

"Because I couldn't face you anymore, because I was so scared you'd hate me when you found out. I needed to push you away so when the time came and you found out, I was already alone and it didn't matter" Louis confesses.

"Oh Louis" Drew says

"We're so sorry" Andy tells him.

"I took the first position that would have me in London and I figured the way they treated me was what I deserved and my punishment for killing mum and dad, that's why I stayed and that's why I took what they were doing to me, because I thought I deserved it" Louis tells the boys, his voice steady.

"You deserve to be treated like the amazing person you are Louis" Harry says as he and Scott then come in and sit next to Drew.

"We aren't going anywhere Louis, we will help you through this and we will make sure you know just how much you deserve and how much you are loved" Scott says.

Andy, Edward and Drew smile at Harry and Scott, thankful they are here for them and especially for Louis.

"You don't need to keep us at arms length anymore Louis, we would never blame you and we are just so thankful you survived" Edward says.

"When we thought we'd lost you too Lou, we were all a mess. The relief we felt when we found out you were hanging in there, was the best news we could have received. We are thankful for you every, single, day" Drew tells him.

Louis takes in their words and although he can't believe them completely, he's so thankful for the boys and for the first time in four years he feels somewhat at ease, he feels a light starting somewhere, like he is resurfacing from the dark void he's crawled himself into.

"We love you" Andy says and the other boys all agree.

"I love you too" Louis tells them sincerely.

"You must be in so much pain Lou, let's get you resting and we can give you more pain relief" Andy then says.

Louis doesn't argue, he's to weak and drained to try. He's led back to bed,  given some pills and knocks out in less than five minutes, a little lighter than he was before.