"Your room is very yellow."

I watched Calvin as he walked slowly through my room, looking at the pictures and award certificates that I had pinned to my wall. He was right about how yellow my room was. The walls and furniture were white, but the bedding, chair cushions and picture frames were all a bright yellow color.

Ellen offered to redecorate it many times. She wanted to give my room a pink theme - the same theme the three of them had, but I declined. My room was my sanctuary. The one thing in my life that only I had the control to change. 

Which is why it was weird having him my here. Despite my best efforts to keep him downstairs here he was. In my room. Making it feel different. He called it payback for when I barged into his room uninvited. I started to miss the days where he was quiet and antisocial. That Calvin would have waited patiently on the porch as I finished getting ready for school.

"Berwick High's best advice columnist." He drawled, reading one of the awards. When he turned to me he had a look questioning look on his face. "You gave people advice?"

"Well, you don't have to sound so surprised." I huffed, sliding my feet into my navy blue flats. "Believe it or not, but my life wasn't always the train wreck it is now."

"That is hard to believe."

"Shut up!" I threw a yellow throw pillow at him, but he dodged it effortlessly.

He lets out a low laugh, turning his attention back to my wall of memories.

"Ah, so they were really once your friends?"

I stepped closer, looking at the wall myself. It's been so long since I've looked at the pictures of the four of us together. Usually, when I walk into my room the only thing I focus on is my bed.

Calvin let out a curious 'hmm' and my eyes darted to him.

"What?"

He looks over at me briefly and then steps back towards the door. "Nothing. Are you ready to go?"

"Just say it." I challenged him, folding my arms over my chest. He always had something to say when it came to Faye, Ellen and Jasmine.

"It looks forced."

"What does?"

"Your smile." He motioned towards a picture of the girls and I at a football game.

I look back at the picture. It was cold that night. The metal bleachers were wet from the rain that had passed through before the game. None of us wanted to be there, except Jasmine who was hell-bent on spying on her ex and his new girlfriend. She pulled out her phone and ordered us to look happy, which we did in hopes that she'd finally let us leave. The picture was supposed to make the guy jealous. How? I'm not sure.

"How could you tell?" I asked, mostly to myself.

"Your eyes, when you really smile, they..." He let his words trailed off, leaving me hanging. His eyes focused everywhere but on me. "Shouldn't we get going?"

He didn't even wait for me to say anything before he disappeared out the door. He was acting weird, which made me feel weird. Whether it was a good or bad weird was a mystery to me.

+++

"Mia, wait up."

I glanced over my shoulder to see Derek weaving his way through the busy corridor and groaned. He was a really sweet guy, but completely clueless at times. Quickening my pace I tried to create as much distance between me and him as possible, but he was too fast. He had me cornered in an empty classroom and I couldn't escape.

"Didn't you hear me calling you?" He asked, adjusting the backpack that hung on his shoulder.

"You're girlfriend doesn't want us talking to each other." I reminded him as I helplessly looked for an escape route.

"Faye and I broke up." He announced a little too proudly for my liking.

"She dumped you?"

"I'm sure that's the story she'll tell everyone." He chuckled. "After you left the party she went ballistic and that was the last straw, you know? So, I broke up with her. Just ended it."

He sliced his hand through the air as if he was beheading someone. Me.

"Why?" I sighed as I slumped down into one of the empty seats. "She's going to think you broke up with her because of me. She's never going to talk to me again."

"Is that really a bad thing?" He shrugged. "I just stepped out of the Faye bubble and I gotta tell you, it's great."

"The Faye bubble?"

"The Faye bubble." He repeats with a nod as he took the seat across from me. "I didn't realize it existed until I stepped out of it. Everything seems perfect inside the bubble, but the bubble is only screwing with your head. It confuses you and you think you're having a great time, but you're not."

My head began to hurt and I'm pretty sure this conversation is a huge reason for it. I was still stuck on the fact the he and Faye split up to even try and make sense of 'the bubble'. Derek did seem different though. He was smiling for once and looked energetic like he's had way too much caffeine. I could tell he was happy with no longer being in the bubble. I couldn't help but feel happy for him, even if he did destroy any chance I had of becoming friends with Faye again.

"That's great for you," I said, standing up. "But I liked being in the bubble and you're making it really difficult for me to get back into it."

"Okay." He stood up as well, a half smile on his face. "I don't get it, but okay."

Of course he didn't get it. No one did. The two of us stepped out of the classroom and went our separate ways. I didn't get very far before being stop again. This time I was interrupted by Jasmine and Ellen. The scowls and soul scorching eyes made the hairs on the back of neck stand.

"If there was a contest for the world's crappiest friend you would be the reigning champ." Ellen's usually innocent features darkened as she spoke.

"If this is about the break up then - "

Jasmine held up her hand, signaling for me to stop and I did.

"It's about that," She admitted. "This is also about the fact that you were just doing God knows what in that classroom with him."

They saw. Of course they saw, they see everything. There was no way I'd be able to convince them that my meeting with Derek was completely innocent. I doubted that they'd even give me a chance to explain.

"We spent all weekend trying to figure out why Derek would dump Faye out of the blue. Now we know why." Ellen frowned in disapproval, shaking her head at me. "If you wanted him for yourself then you shouldn't have set them up in the first place."

I wanted to defend myself against their accusations, but I didn't feel like I was in a place to do so. I felt guilty about Derek and Faye breaking up and I hated that they thought it was because of me, but I had no way out of this situation.

I finally had to accept that fact that they were never going to allow me back into their group. My friendship with them was six feet under and there was no hope of reviving it. Ellen was right, I am a crappy friend. To think I'd make thing right after what I did was stupid.

"I hope you both catch some horrible, incurable STD." Jasmine smirks before her and Ellen sauntered off down the hallway giggling. 

//

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