THE DREAM

No one is worth dying for, sweetheart.

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WARNING: Mention and description of attempted suicide.

CHAPTER LII

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SOUND WAVES COULDN'T pass through water, I briefly remembered from my last physics class. I found it hard to believe, because there I was, completely submerged by the water of the pool and I could still hear everything going on around me.

I heard the pounding music in the background and the sound of chatter and laughter from my peers. Or maybe I felt it. Maybe I was soaking in the last moments of life before it slipped away from me completely.

I was hyper-alert of my entire surroundings, but even that seemed to fade along with my will to live. I stayed beneath the water's surface for longer than a dozen seconds and not long after, I felt my lungs begin to beg for the oxygen I was depriving them of. I remained indifferent. I let myself sink to the bottom as if I didn't need to come up for air.

After all, I didn't need to. I needed to die.

In that moment, I had made up my mind. That after that night, I, Araceli Constantine Cruz, would be no more.

A part of me felt guilty. Out of all the nights I decided to take my own life did it really have to be this one? In this specific place? Teenagers had come to the party to have fun, but the only thing they would be experiencing was severe trauma once they had to witness someone fish my dead body out of the poor homeowner's pool.

I opened my eyes to take a look at my surroundings one last time as I slowly felt myself get lost in my unconsciousness.

I expected it to be quick and painless, granted I didn't think too much about it before I finally made the decision. Hell, I didn't even write a suicide note. The one thing that I had been sure of though was the fact that my passing would be stress free.

I was rudely awaken from that delusion at the sight of a brown-hair, brown-eyed boy swimming towards me with determination. I wanted to tell him no and to go away, to let him know that it was deliberate and I didn't want him to rescue me, but sound waves didn't travel through water.

Due to my oxygen deprived brain and my quick fade into unconsciousness, time seemed to blur into one. Before I could shake my head, he was already right beside me.

His arms wrapped around my waist and I felt a sharp spark travel up my spine at the contact, but didn't have time to dwell on it. In what felt like just mere seconds and the longest of years, he swam back up to the surface, making me suck in a deep breath of my dearly missed fresh air subconsciously.

I placed my hand on his shoulders, almost in a weak attempt to push him away, but I reached towards the sky as if the higher I got, the more oxygen I would receive.

My chest rose and fell violently and my lungs burned in my ribcage. For a second, as I felt the life slip back into me with every inhale, I felt happy and relieved that he had come to my rescue and I didn't succeed in dying.

But after more thinking, I realised that I was disappointed. Because there was nobody else to celebrate my survival with. There was nobody else to care.

A crowd of fellow aged party-goers, both drunk and sober alike, had gathered around the pool by the time that I had become oriented to properly take in my surroundings, and I found myself shrinking into the boys chest in fear. I didn't want people to know that this was a failed suicide attempt. I didn't want them to think of me as pathetic - so stupid, I couldn't even off myself right.

I knew it, a party was not the time or place to properly end my life.

I whimpered subconsciously and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face into his hair as he rubbed my back soothingly.

“What the fuck are you looking at?” his voice boomed, making a shiver climb up my spine at the sheer authority in it.

I didn't look up, but I could hear pissed off grumbling and the sound of shuffling feet walking away. He waited a couple seconds before he began swimming towards the edge with me in his arms. It was no easy feat, but I knew if I let go, I would attempt again and he would save me and it would be an endless cycle.

He gently pried my arms off his neck and lifted me onto the pool floor. I heard someone's footsteps come up behind me and I quickly whipped around to see who it was in fear.

The boy was oddly familiar. He was extremely tall with light stubble and a buzz cut. His eyes were dark as he peered down at me and his features were sharp.

In that moment, I recognised him as the boy people called Pablo. He looked way older than his age, which was just eighteen, and that was what made the girls flock to him with the added benefit of his good looks. He and some other guy had been the topic of every girl's conversation ever since they rocked up to California for the summer break. I didn't see him around much, but whenever I did, he was always with his partner in crime. The boy known as Daniel.

They were always together. They caused trouble together. They helped the community together.

That made my eyes widen. If they were always together, then why was he all of a sudden there alone?

I whipped around to look at my saviour and felt my heart drop to my ass once I realised who it was. The same curly hair that every girl dreamt of running her hand through, the same dark brown eyes that made you feel things, both in your heart and in your panties. The same delinquent Daniel.

His features were a bit softer than Pablo's but were still striking, especially with his smoldering gaze.

They were always together. Two years apart and they were like brothers.

As pretty as the boys in front of me were, they were both well known for a couple things: their devilishly good looks and their long track record of delinquency.

I'd always seen them from a far, and while I joined the other girls in gossiping about how it would feel to be with both of them, I realised then that I really didn't want to be. For one, even through his bad boy ways, Daniel had a girlfriend who he was extremely faithful to and took every opportunity to talk about.

And Pablo looked at everyone like he was going to kill them.

That wasn't what scared most people away though. What scared most people was Daniel's father and Pablo's involvement with him.

Lucien Reyes was no stranger to the extremely prominent Mexican cartel. In fact, he ran it. And Daniel and Pablo were no strangers to his business.

I had the hier to an infamous underground cartel floating in the pool water, between my legs and had a prominent member of it looking down at me with concern.

The real kicker, though? They had both just witnessed me almost kill myself.

I staggered awake from the disgruntling nightmare, thanking my God once I realised that I was still in the Spanish villa and not taken back to that awful time again. I placed a hand on my chest to catch my breath as I sat up before running it down my face in an attempt to wipe away the remaining sleep from my eyes.

The natural daylight streamed in through the floor-to-ceiling window, illuminating the large room only making me tilt my head to the side. Last I remembered, it was the dead of night and I was in the car with Daniel. Unless he drove me home and put me in bed himself.

My thoughts stayed on Daniel as my confusion died down. More especially, Daniel and my dream. A part of me wondered whether he still remembered that time - when we all first met.

Of course he remembered, he wasn't one to forget! And I think he knew, deep down, that I never wanted to talk about it so that was probably why he never brought it up. Plus, how could you casually work that into a conversation?

“Yeah, by the way, remember that time, five years ago, when you attempted to kill yourself in a party full of teenagers and I saved you? Yeah, haha, good times,” I mocked as I peeled the covers off my legs. “Fucking ridiculous.”

I had no idea what I was mad at, but something gave me a feeling that it was the dream. I mean, I was happy before it came along, I didn't see why it had to come with its bad memories and ruin my day the way it did.

Suddenly my thoughts halted and backtracked and I felt an even deeper frown slip onto my face.

My mother.

I still had no idea what I was going to do with her. I mean, I did. I just didn't know how I was going to go about it. I knew I needed to contact my mother; just for closure, just to move on.

Just to make sure that she was truly a closed chapter in my book. I just didn't know how.

“You look like you're thinking hard.”

I jumped at the sudden entrance of a second voice in my one woman talk-show and snapped my head to the side to see Daniel walking out of the bathroom with a towel hanging low off his waist.

“Oh my God,” I breathed, shaking my head. “You scared the shit out if me.”

“It's not very hard.”

I ignored the comment and instead glared at his back as he pulled on a pair of boxers and some sweats. He strolled across the entire length of the room and made himself comfortable on the armchair facing out the window. He then picked up a book and started flipping through it, presumably to find what page he left off.

“What time are you leaving?” he looked up from his book and met my eyes with a questioning eyebrow raised. “I mean for whatever business meeting you need to go to?”

“How did you know I have a meeting?”

His deep voice made my stomach churn, but I played it off and rolled my eyes instead. “How wouldn't I know, Daniel? You always leave.”

He shrugged his shoulders in passive agreement before getting up from his seat and making his way over to me.

“I want you to have all your things packed by ten this night,” he said, sitting in front of me as I shifted my legs to make space for him. “We're flying back to the US.”

I frowned and crossed my arms over my chest. “Are you serious? I come to Spain and I don't even get to go sightseeing? Ridiculous.”

His eyes shown with humour at my temper tantrum, but he didn't comment on it and instead walked towards the door. “I'll take you sightseeing next time.”

“Yeah. If you marry me, you can take my around the world for our honeymoon,” I joked, but he turned to me with serious eyes and frowned.

“When, Araceli.”

“What?”

“When I marry you.”

My eyes widened at his words and my stomach dropped suddenly as my heart beat harder in my chest. “Don't play with me like that, Daniel.”

He smirked as he opened the door, showing that he was most likely playing. “But who said I am?”

He had to be! I loved him, but we weren't that serious. Or at least he wasn't that serious about me. I mean, who was?

But what if he was?

He chuckled and left me there to overthink everything again.

*****

Wow. So there's a lot to unpack in this chapter.

Such a shame that I'm not going to help do that. Lmao see yall next Monday.

Ciao 💃🚪