'Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.'

-William Goldman, William Goldman: Four Screenplays
~~~
Hayworth Estate;

Emma stepped into the courtyard of the manor with hesitant steps.

An anticipation, unlike anything she had ever felt, surged through her.
Her visit to the Hayworth Estate was nothing new. She had spent her entire childhood here.

But something was certainly different about her visits since Maya’s wedding. The estate felt empty without Maya. Every corner of the manor seemed to remind her of her dearest friend. However, that was not the only reason of her apprehensions.

This place had changed in more than one way for her. She had begun to find her heart softening towards the one person she had deemed incorrigible.
Brandon Hayworth had been steadily proving himself to be a caring man, instead of the incorrigible rake that she had perceived him to be.
Emma had learned to see the beating heart beneath the tough, devil-may-care façade that he embodied.
Over the last month or so, they had turned civil towards each other.

They bickered as usual, but the tone of their bickering had turned from hostile to teasing. Instead of being offended by his scandalous and callous words, she found herself fighting to hide her smile.

She knew what plagued Brandon Hayworth.
His actions had started to make more sense to her ever since the night of Maya’s wedding.
But after hating his guts for such a long time, the shift in her feelings regarding the man was frightening.

Hence, she had decided to avoid him as much as possible. That however, seemed to be a difficult task when she had promised Maya to visit Lady Margaret every week.
Running into Brandon had been inevitable.

Today though, fortune seemed to be on her side. Brandon was nowhere to be seen and she found herself hurriedly planning her exit after her meeting with Lady Margaret.

She had just taken a sigh of relief when a pair of footsteps sounded behind her.

“Emma!”

Emma turned abruptly as she recognised the owner of the voice and felt herself smiling warmly.

“Averey! How are you?”

Averey tried to hide his pleasure upon seeing the smile on Emma’s face.
He had been anticipating her weekly visits more eagerly than he would ever confess.
Her presence had been a constant in their life since childhood. Maya was seldom without her company.
Hence, it had taken some time to adjust to the idea of her absence. That must be why he awaited her visits.
Her presence made Maya’s absence hurt less.

“I am fine, as always. Did you talk to grandma? Is she okay?”

Their grandmother had not taken Maya’s absence well. Although she insisted, she was fine, they all knew she wasn’t.

Emma’s face dimmed at the question.
“She is the same. She really misses Maya. You all should spend more time with her.”

“We all do! But we could not seem to make her any happier. I am really worried about her.”

Emma could clearly see the worry in his eyes and instantly regretted telling him about her doubts.
He was a kind-hearted and gentle man. She knew he would take her words to heart and constantly trouble himself over them.

“She would be alright with time. Do not be so distressed.”

Averey sighed as he took note of her words.
They did little to ease his doubts but he appreciated them. She had turned more civil towards everyone over the past few weeks and he had begun cherishing each and every one of their short conversations.

“My! Lady Mortimer! Here in the flesh…we have been blessed.”

Emma’s heart skipped a beat as she found Brandon nearing them with his usual lazy stride and crooked grin.
His hand threaded through his dark locks as he pushed them away from his face.

“Has she managed to talk your ear off yet?”

Emma tried to keep the amusement out of her face as she turned to give him an unimpressed expression.

Emma beat Averey to the reply,
“I might have been able to, if you hadn’t decided to interrupt our very nice conversation.”

Averey did not miss the mischief in Emma’s tone as she turned her entire attention to Brandon.

“Where have you been? It is nearing sunset.”
Averey’s voice was full of censure as he looked at him.

Brandon took his time before replying, making sure to cast an inquisitive glance at Emma first.
“Do not worry, brother. I was simply out entertaining my admirers. They deserve a few minutes of my company in exchange of their tenacious veneration.”

Emma felt a pang of emotion at his words.
She knew it would be safer for her to not delve into its origins.

“And where were you achieving this mission of yours?”
Averey’s question did little to ease Emma’s discomfort.
She did not need to know anything about Brandon’s excursions.

“Out in the village for the harvest festival. They are having the bonfire tonight.”

Brandon stopped for a second before turning towards Emma, “You could join me, if you want, Lady Mortimer. Maybe, I could shower you with some of my undivided attention.”

Emma stilled at the intensity of his gaze. His words were as crude as ever, but she could not mistake the persuasion with which they were spoken. She found it necessary to dissipate some of the tension that surrounded them.
Moreover, she could not overlook the fact that his rendezvous made her more than a little displeased.

“I hardly doubt you would be able to do that, Brandon.
I am not swayed that easily. Your presence would only add to my displeasure. I am not like your admirers.”

She saw the flash of surprise that passed Brandon’s eyes. She herself could not find the reason behind the sudden bitterness of her tone.
This was not good.
He would not let this pass.

Averey saw their exchange with an unbridled disappointment. His opportunity with her was lost.
He knew his presence would not be appreciated anymore.
Making his exit was the best thing he could do.

“I need to talk to grandmother. You better be ready for the supper in time, Bran.”

He did not wait long to see the distracted nod of Brandon’s head and the flush on Emma’s face as he made his way to the manor.

Brandon knew he had said something wrong the minute Emma’s tone hardened.
She had been so sweet with him the last few weeks. Conversing with her had been the best part of his days. 
They bantered with good humour and she finally seemed to be warming up to him.

Now that she did not have a permanent frown marring her features whenever she talked to him, he found himself confirming what he had always suspected- Emma Mortimer was beautiful.
And that terrified him.

Acknowledging that about her meant accepting the undeniable attraction that he had always felt towards her; and that was the last thing he wanted.

And after disclosing his feelings to her on the night of Maya’s wedding, he found himself noticing her more and more. That had been one of the most embarrassing moments of his life.
He had never let his guard down- especially in front of someone who was not his family. But Emma had looked at him with an understanding that had compelled him to disclose his worries to her.
In the process, he had gained himself a friend and a confidant.

Friend! It was the most unexpected, if not undesirable, progression.

“You have that wretched frown on your face again, My Lady…If I did not know any better, I would have taken it as an indication of your jealousy.”

Emma gasped at his words. Jealously! What a preposterous suggestion!
But an indignant corner of her mind kept doubting if that was what she had felt.

“You are highly mistaken, My Lord. As I already stated, I am not at all affected by your rakish behaviour. Therefore, feeling jealous is a farfetched observation.
I am merely feeling pity for all the maidens who bask in your false affection.”

Emma tried to keep her voice steady and unaffected as she replied.
But her words seemed to have little effect on Brandon, who kept staring at her with a smug expression.

“Are you sure certain about that, Emma?”

She stilled at the warning behind his eyes, but kept her front.

“Absolutely.”

“

Then…”

Emma knew she was in trouble the moment he expelled a deep breath and moved closer to her, keeping the intensity of his gaze focussed solely on her.

“This does not affect you?”

Brandon’s voice was a mere whisper as he stood just a few inches away from her.

“No…”

Emma cursed herself as she detected a less than subtle hint of doubt in her voice.
It was a blatant lie.
She would have to be a lifeless to be unfeeling when a man like him made her the centre of his attention.

Being in such a close vicinity, she found it easier to sympathise with his admirers.
He was a fine man.
Though Maya resembled her mother in all other aspects, it was Brandon who had been blessed with her exotic features. He had the most breath-taking sun-kissed skin.
Augmenting that was the fiercest pair of deep, black eyes that she had ever seen.

What a fool she had been to ever think that she could escape their charm!

“I-I think it is time for me to leave.”

Brandon smirked knowingly as she abruptly turned away from him and almost sprinted her way out of the courtyard.

“Have a safe journey, my lady!”
His loud voice carried itself to the retreating figure, causing her to blush even more furiously.
__________________________________

“You are not defined by the actions of your parents, my child.”

His grandmother’s soft voice reached Averey as he stood by the window of her chambers.

He turned to face her, not bothering to mask the defeated sigh that escaped him.
She had been saying the same thing to him for years. But it had not managed to expel his doubts and regrets.

“Grandma-“

“No, Averey. What your father and mother did was wrong. There is no debating that. But you are not responsible for their actions.
How long are you going to blame yourself for what happened?”

Lady Margaret’s tone was full of compassion as she beckoned him closer.
Averey sat himself beside her on the bed, taking her hands in his own.

“I am not blaming myself, grandma.”

Lady Margaret smiled sadly as she looked into his tortured eyes. “I see you doing that every day, my child. You do not allow yourself to be happy.
I understand what you must feel. But being like this is not going to help. You have to remember that a person is not defined by their parent’s actions.
If they were, then that would make me a horrible mother for what Zachary did.”

“No, grandma! You are the best mother he could ever have.” Averey’s reply was instantaneous as he gripped her hands tighter.

“Then, you are the best son they both could ever have. Brandon and Maya are fortunate to have you as their brother.
I trust you to take care of them…even when I am not around. You are the voice of reason among all your brothers, Averey. Brandon is a very passionate boy. He is burdened with a lot of anger and resentment. And though I have tried my hardest, I could not get that out of him. He tries to hide it behind his carefree mask but you and I both know the truth.
The only thing I want is for all my grandchildren to be happy. If at least you are able to let go of all your burdens and enjoy the life you have, I would die a happy woman.”

“Grandmother! Why are you talking like that?”
Averey’s felt his heartbeat plummet with fear upon hearing her words.

“I am just talking about the inevitable, my child. Before that happens, I wish to know that you are happy. Only then would you be able to persuade Brandon to abandon his anger. Would you promise me that?”

Averey felt a dreadful feeling creep up his spine as he held her gaze.
He did the only thing he could manage to do at the moment.
Bringing her hands closer, he pressed a fervent kiss upon them, willing for his love to be enough of an assurance.

“I promise, grandma. Now, you are not to talk about something so horrible ever again, alright?”

Lady Margaret smiled wistfully as she took in the worried look in his eyes.
“Alright.”
__________________________________

Graves Tavern;

Gwen found herself struggling to assimilate the fact that Lord Berkeley was sitting in the tavern without a drink by his hands.

She had noticed a strange lightness in his expression when he had entered a few minutes back.
Her confusion had only increased further when he simply sat in his usual corner, not bothering to ask for his liquor to be arranged.

She fought hard to suppress the sense of relief that threatened to overwhelm her as she made her way to him.

“You seem to be in better spirits, My Lord. Has there been some positive development in our Kingdom?”
Gwen spoke with a short smile, fearing his withdrawal to his old self.

Geoffrey did not seem surprised by her question.
He was indeed happy today. Seeing Maya contended in her new life had caused him to feel more relaxed than ever.
The best part of his days of training in the Palace was getting to meet Maya.

“I met Maya today.”
His answer, spoken with the warmest of tones, caused Gwen’s smile to widen.

“Princess Consort? I have heard a lot about her. All pleasant things, of course.”

She had indeed heard a lot of praises about the young Royal. Over the years, Gwen had managed to decipher the unusual affection that Lord Berkley carried for the Hayworth siblings.
Her training as a spy under Lord Fitzgerald had made her more perceptive to other’s emotions and feelings.
It had not been hard to figure out the reason behind Lord Berkeley’s misery.

“Yes. She will make a magnificent ruler.”

Gwen sucked in a short breath as she witnessed the soft smile on Geoffrey’s face.
But it was gone the very next moment.
He composed his face back to its usual passiveness as soon as he realised his slip. It seemed like he was ashamed to give in to even a single moment of happiness.

The silence stretched painfully between them until Gwen could not contain her words anymore.
“How long are you going to keep punishing yourself, Lord Berkeley?”

Geoffrey snapped his eyes to her face, frowning upon noticing the disapproval on her face.

“What are you talking about?”

Gwen chuckled humourlessly.
“You are not living your life, My Lord. At least not in the way the Lord meant for you live it.
I understand that you have lost someone. We all have. But we have to continue with our lives.”

Geoffrey’s eyes hardened as he looked at her.
“Do not try to feign understanding, Gwen. You have no inkling of what I lost. It is my life. I would do with it as I please.”

Gwen scrunched her eyes, trying to avoid the brunt of his hurtful words.
“I do understand. I had loved once too. He was a great man. He took me in when I feared I had nothing to live for. He gave my life a direction and made me feel cared for. Whether he loved me the same way as I did, is inconsequential. What matters is that he made me realize what love is. After he was gone, I did not think I could love another. But I was wrong.”

Geoffrey gulped as he registered the pain behind her words. He knew she was talking about Brandon.
He had seen her melancholy months after his death. But this was the first time she had ever voiced it.

He suddenly felt ashamed for speaking to her the way he did. She did not deserve his impassivity.

“Gwen, I-"

“No, My Lord. If she was as kind and pure-hearted as you claim her to be, then she would never be happy seeing you wasting your life like this.
If you wish to honour her memory, then live your life to the fullest; so that when you do get the chance of reuniting with her, you could proudly tell her about it.
Tell her that her memory did not stop you from living again- loving again.
Rather, it gave you the courage to continue.”

Geoffrey’s gaze was tortured as he looked straight in her eyes.
“You do not understand…It is impossible for me. I cannot bear to continue without her, Gwen. She was the one true love for me. There is no one else.”

His words, spoken with such a stark sincerity, sent a jolt of pain in Gwen’s heart.
She knew that if she continued, she would just be welcoming more agony and heartache but she did nonetheless,

“There is, My Lord. There is always a person who is willing to love us unconditionally.
But for that, you have to be accepting of their love.
There is a woman who loves you; loves you so reverently that she is willing to be contended to alleviate you of all your pain and sufferings.
And it hurts her to see you in a miserable state. It kills her to know that her love would never be enough to persuade you live your life…”

Geoffrey sat with a stricken expression as he listened to Gwen’s fervent voice.
How had he missed it?

He had been blind to her devotion for all these years, always considering her to be a good friend.
But hearing the longing in her voice and seeing the yearning in her eyes, reminded him of himself.
He was well aware of the pain that loving someone who would never be yours, caused.
There was no mistaking the meaning behind her words.
Was he to be blamed for that?

Surely, she knew he could never reciprocate her feelings.
It was too late for him. Saya was the only woman he could ever love.

“Gwen, I am so sorry…”

It was at that moment that Gwen knew she had lost him forever; lost the hope that she had been harbouring all these years.

There was no hope to gain back the man that he had once been.

When she spoke again, her voice was defeated and resigned,
“I understand. You do not have to love me, My Lord. I would do enough for both of us.
I just hope that your acrimony and bitterness with life does not ruin the memory of the one who holds your heart.”

Geoffrey stared at her retreating figure with a clenched jaw, willing above everything else, to have a bottle of liquor to erase the doubts and hurt that her words had sowed in his mind and heart.
__________________________________

Author's Note-

Hello to all my wonderful readers!
Thank you so much for your patience. My exams are not yet over but I managed to squeez this chapter in my schedule.

The Uni is going ballistic! They are yet undecided on the dates of our exams and we are stuck in a limbo.
I have no idea what is going to happen. That seems to be the case with every single situation these days though 🤷

So, what do you think of the chapter?
It is comparitively shorter. But consider it the calm before the storm!
The next few chapters are going to be full of drama😈

What is your view on the Brandon-Emma-Averey situation?
Who should be with whom?

(P.S. I already have the ending planned.)

Also, do you agree with Gwen?
Should Geoffrey allow himself to love again?
But more importantly, is he capable of doing that?

(P.S. Ending is already planned!)

Is there really such a thing as one true great love of your life or can you fall in love more than once?

Don't forget to point out any typos that you may encounter.😊

That's it everyone. I hope you have at least a marginally better week ahead.

Stay safe and eat well!

Till the next time 👋