I want to,
tangle with you
and fall into you
and feel all of you
your breath, your skin
your hands, your heart,
and your everything..

Just you and all of you!

Jahan

" We are going to be parents."

The loud voice boomed just as I pushed our bedroom door open. My ears perked up and turned cold. So did my fingers on the doorknob stiffened.

" What?"

I voiced out as my jaw hung down seeing my wife and sister in law now look at me stunned. Their eyes looked wide and Saboohi's face paled as she averted her eyes quickly to Afaaf's face.

" Um, I'll go prepare tea."

Afaaf gave a nervous smile as she gestured with her fingers, zipping up her mouth and throwing away the key. The woman squeezed herself out of the room and closed the door behind me.

" Jahan-"

Saboohi swallowed as she looked at me again. I blinked my eyes still trying to comprehend. Saboohi bent down and picked up a thin kit as she stretched her hand out to me.

" We are going to be parents."

She nodded.

I blinked again. Feeling as if cold breeze had just went past me and frozen half of my motor and sensory pathways.

" I have a baby in.. here."

Saboohi heaved as she voiced out and her voice shook slightly. My frozen feet led me to my wife and I gulped before taking the kit from her seeing the reading it gave.

A baby?

Parents?

" Ah! A baby, Jahan."

Saboohi's voice cut through and I looked at the hand she had placed over her flat stomach. My hand slightly faltered over the kit before I reached my other hand over my wife's hand. Feeling the flat of her stomach.

" I am going to be a dad?"

I asked in assurance, offering her a tilt of my smile this time. Seeing thousands of emotions run over her features. Her butterscotch eyes brimmed with shining tears and her chin wobbled as she nodded her head eagerly. I let out a nervous breath before snaking my arms around her frame easily. Saboohi clung to me tightly, her arms encircling around my neck. I nuzzled my face in the warmth of her neck as I pulled her impossibly closer.

" Oh Saboohi."

I breathed out in relief, letting the newfound happiness to wash over me. The emotions finally settling in and the heaviness of the words now finally taking over my senses. My frozen self shrugged into warmth and I squeezed the woman into my arms. Saboohi burst into sobs right after. Making me cup the back of her head.

" Jahan, we're having a baby."

She stuttered. And I nodded into her neck.

" I am going to be a mother. A mother."

Her sobs grew more and I pulled back slowly.

" Alhamdulillah."

I assured her and wiped away her round pearls of her tears. Her reddened face contoured into a smile and she nodded her head.

" I am so happy. Ahh!" She leapt forward and into my arms and I chuckled out.

" I am too."

I closed my eyes taking a whiff of her shampooed hair and inhaled deeply. My heart was still soaring with the happiness. With the blessing.

Saboohi's shoulders dropped and she shifted all of her body weight towards me. Indicating me how tired she was. And I folded my arms on her back and gently walked us to the bed. Helping Saboohi under the covers. I shrugged off my suit jacket and shoes and I joined her under the covers. Her exhausted eyes looked up at me. Making me give her a soft look.

" Jahan. I am still so overwhelmed. I have a life inside of me."

" Yes my jaan."

I couldn't resist kissing the crown of her forehead at her innocence. She grinned at my gesture and rolled in closer to me so that now her head lay over my arm. And her brown hair curtained over the pillow like a bride's veil.

" What would we say to everyone? Who would tell them? Me or you? You tell them, you know how awkward I get-"

" Shsh."

I silenced her rambling with my finger over her lips. And grinned down at her excited self.

" Take it slowly, Saboohi."

She giggled in embarrassment and I shook my head. Interlacing our fingers together, I placed my head against her.

" We'll tell everyone together. And then there would be news of celebration everywhere."

I promised silently in the cocoon of her warmth and she smiled beautifully.

" Yes."

She breathed before nuzzling in my shoulder and closing her eyes. I pushed a thick tendril of her hair away and looked down at her. Within minutes she had slept and I smiled to myself. Exhaling, I turned my face away to the ceiling and breathed in and out.

I was going to be a dad.

Dad.

The word itself felt surreal.

And stomach twisted and my eyes squinted into slits as I pondered over the words again and again. My vision blurred as my heart shook in my chest.

I was blessed with this blessing again.

With a child again.

•

" Oh my Allah."

" Shukran Shukran."

" Hurry, send the driver for sweets."

" MashAllah."

" Mubarak Mubarak."

The hall erupted with happiness and congratulations. As everyone gathered to shower love and blessings over us.

" Jahan, now you'd have to take extra care of my daughter."

Mom kissed Saboohi's head yet again as she addressed me. I beamed at the women and nodded my head. Zaryaab from besides me left to get sweets while everyone whisked around us. Mohid effortlessly climbing into my lap.

" When would we tell Saboohi's mother?"

" We should invite her over."

" Let's call a family celebration."

" It's too early right now. Saboohi would go into exhaustion too soon."

" Hm, Saboohi you'll have to gain loads of weight now. You'd be feeding two lives now."

" Have you guys decided any names?"

" What do you think? A boy or a girl?"

" Oho no! Saboohi what do you want? A baby girl or a boy?"

" Jahan what do you want?"

" Your babies are going to be so beautiful. MashAllah."

" Have you guys gotten an appointment yet?"

" Afaaf's doctor was a nice lady, we could consult her again."

My eyes settled at Saboohi's. Seeing the woman look at me as well. Our eyes a fraction wide. And then we roamed our eyes to our most overwhelmed family.

" Guys calm down."

I voiced seeing everyone fighting and arguing over things we hadn't even thought of. Every sharp eye cut to look at me as everyone silenced.

" Jahan, have you thought about schools yet?"

Dadi Gul Jan said breaking the silence and my mouth dropped open.

" Schools?"

I asked confused and just then everyone cracked into laughter. And Saboohi being included. I shook my head at the fluffy wit.

•

My footsteps padded against the stairs, echoing in the silent and dimly lit home. My fingers caressed the warm glass as I made my way up to our bedroom. Turning the door open, I stilled for a minute.

" Oh hi."

Saboohi breathed as she looked up from the laptop screen abruptly. I give her a nod and closed the bedroom door. My fingers still caressed the glass now. Not because of its warmth but because of the nervousness that settled within me.

" Dr. Zeba emailed back, sorry I opened it."

Saboohi said as she leaned against the cushion of the couch and I give her a nod again. Lowering my gaze, I walked to where she sat on the couch and placed the warm milk before her. Settling next to her, I looked at the laptop screen seeing Dr. Zeba's email indeed over the webpage.

Saboohi wasn't looking at me. She wasn't even saying something. Damn, she wasn't even asking for an explanation and that scared me more. That made me more guilty and nervous.

" I just wanted to have an opinion with her, regarding your pregnancy. I just wanted to be sure it wouldn't cause you any sort of stress that would distress your feelings anymore."

I explained.

" Jahan."

Saboohi whispered but I shook my head. Still not meeting my eyes with her.

" I am sorry if it hurt you. I just don't want to lose-"

Saboohi's hand curled around my fingers and she gave it a light squeeze.

" I just don't want to lose you in anyway possible, Saboohi."

" Jahan, you won't."

Saboohi's fingers squeezed mine again as she assure in a soft voice. And I looked up at her this time.

" Jahan, you won't lose me or our baby, okay?"

She cupped my cheeks and stated with so much confidence that my heart swell and my eyes burned.

" Okay?"

She asked again. And I nodded.

" Okay."

" Good. And Jahan, I am perfectly fine. I am gonna complete my first trimester next month, have you seen me act weird during these last two months?"

Her innocent eyes asked and I shook my head.

" No love, you haven't."

I answered with honesty. Pulling her closer to me, I gave her cheek a nice kiss.

" Great then. And now, finish this milk."

She said, huffing irritatedly at the end. My eyes widened as I looked at her.

" Madam, this is for you. You finish it right away."

I said pushing the glass in her hands, like a strict mother. Adding a hint of anger, I gave her a stern eye.

" Tsk, Jahan these tricks dont work on me anymore. And please keep this away."

Her butterscotch eyes threw daggers at me. And she twisted her face away. I hissed before keeping the glass away and getting hold of hands with one of my own. Curling the other around her shoulders, I pulled her to me.

" Now that's a good girl."

I said before holding up the glass once again. The woman gasped in annoyance only and wiggled her hands.

" Jahan, No. I just had milkshake before diner and now this. Please no no no no."

She shook her head and gave me her best puppy eyes.

" Yes my jaan yes."

I cooed softly and let her lips touch the rim of the glass.

" Bismillah."

I whispered as she chugged down the milk in three gulps. Her eyes glared at me as I left her hands and placed down the glass.

" Bye, I am off to sleep."

I chuckled behind her as she sauntered to the bed in her 'mother to be' sweatshirt. Shaking my head, I dimmed the lights before sliding in with her. Saboohi wasn't asleep and as soon as my head hit the pillow she joined in my planet.

To this day, I still found her planet theory cute and unique. Saboohi had different perspective to everything. She just thought differently. She was just her. And no one. She was just herself.

" Do you think we should look for cribs?"

I whispered as we stared at the ceiling in silence and dark. She hummed.

" what color should we go for then?" I asked again. Distractingly nuzzling in her hair.

" I guess we'll have to wait a little then. You know till we know the gender."

" Uhm mhm."

" Do you think it's a girl or a boy?"

Saboohi asked as she placed her chin over my chest making me adjust my head to have a nice look at her. I thought for a second and easily smiled.

" I don't know-"

" Tsk, what do you want?" She asked with utter interest. Her eyes glinting in the dark.

" Hmm, a daughter."

" A daughter?"

My wife sat up and crossed her feet one over another and placed her hands around her belly.

" Mhm, a daughter that would have my beautiful eyes and your beautiful smile."

I grinned.

" Hm, having a daughter seems good. I like the idea. But if we have a son, I'd like him to have your eyes and your smile. He should be just a little more handsome than you."

I chuckled at her thoughts and pulled her back to me. We lay side by side. Soon drifting off to sleep.

•

5 months later

" Jahan. Wake up."

I could still hear my wife's soft voice as she called out from the bathroom.

" Five more minutes, Saboohi."

I groaned in the softness of the pillows. And nuzzled my head under them.

" Pull the curtains please."

I requested with my muffled voice.

" No Jahan, you have to wake up."

Saboohi hissed and I could imagine her saying that as she brushed her freshly showered hair.

" I will in three minutes."

I yawned and pulled the covers over my head to prevent the sunlight from escaping inside my eyelids.

" Jahan, you don't even care about me anymore. You don't even listen to me anymore."

Saboohi's voice sounded close this time and I hummed under my breath before sitting up straight. My foggy vision could spot a white silhouette at the foot of the bed and I squinted my eyes. Running a hand past my hair, I pushed them away from my eyes and looked with a better vision. And what I saw knocked the literal breath out of me.

The woman's hair had grown during the past few months and reached till her wide hips. Her luscious hair fell in loose curls around her sweetheart shaped face. But what caught my attention more was the white fabric that covered her body. It was a maternity dress, made out of fine net and that stuck to her perfectly. That caressed all her curves at the right places and her protruding belly. Her swollen stomach made my eyes stay on her frame a little longer and my heart swelled. It felt as if I was still deep in sleep and was still dreaming. The sight seemed so surreal and enthralling that I couldn't avert my eyes. It seemed though all lights were flashing over her. Over Saboohi. Her rounded stomach made me gulp down my dry throat.

She was carrying my child.

This was it, the most realistic reality. A dream that was coming true. To have a beautiful and supporting wife, a child who'd have my name. Our small family. A family we'll build with our love. And it was happening. We weren't very far from the day when we'd be running after our child. My dream was coming true before my very own eyes.

My eyes snapped to Saboohi's face seeing her reddened nose. She sniffed and I noticed the tissue she dabbed under her eyes harshly.
" Jaan, why are you crying?"

I scattered to the foot worriedly and pulled her to me. Making her sit on lap, I softly wiped away her tears looking at her twisting features.

" Saboohi, would you tell me why are you bawling your eyes out?" I asked softly pushing her hair behind her shoulders.

Damn she still looked so beautiful.

" Jahan, Jahan."

She stammered and I nodded my head assuring her that I was listening to her. My palm splayed over her stomach and I smiled.

" Daddy loves you, my son."

I cooed. Yes, we were having a boy. A boy who would be just a little more handsome than me.

" Baby, what happened?" I asked as my wife's chin wobbled.

" Jahan, what if I am not a good mother to our son?"

Saboohi asked and knocked the breath out of me.

" Then I guess we'll have to find him a new mother."

I suggested and shrugged. Saboohi's sharp eyes cut to me and she hit my shoulder, groaning.

" Jahaaan." She whined at my joke and seeing her hyper self, I rubbed her shoulders.

" I was joking, jaan. You're going to be amazing mother to all our children."

I assured and gave her shoulders a light squeeze. She looked skeptical and lowered her eyes.

" But what if I am never enough? What if I fail them? What if I fail you?"

" Hey."

I tucked two fingers under her chin and lifted her face upto my eyes again.

" You're enough, Saboohi. You know why? Because you have the purest of hearts and no one could ever be a better mother to my children than you. You're an amazing woman and youre going to an amazing mother as well. Okay, let's crack a deal. What if you fail as a mother and I fail as a father? Then we'll still support each other. Hold onto each other and be the best for our children. Not that you already aren't. Okay?"

I asked. Seeing a smile now blow up her beautiful features.

" Where did you learn all this from?"

She asked and she wrapped her arms around my neck. And I shrugged with a smirk.

" Its all your effect."

She grinned and gave my nose a quick peck.

" Now come-on freshen up, breakfast awaits us."

" No breakfast, we are going back to sleep. You woke me up so early-"

I groaned nuzzling my face in her neck. She clicked her tongue.

" Early breakfast, Jahan. You'll spoil our kids this way. We should be trained first."

She started out and I internally thought of only one way to quiten down her worries and so I did that.

I gave her a nice sweet morning kiss.

•

They are having a boy! ❤