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The sound from my pencil against the paper echoed my companionless room, my head down my burning eyes focused on my work. It is most likely three in the morning but I only have a few more files to sign and I would be done. The pencil hovered over the paper leaving a sloppy scribble behind as my exhausted hand moved, I knew I needed sleep since I was assigned to train the cadets later. Yet here I was. Sleep deprived. Again.

A knock on the door filled the room with a different tone, which I ignored. It was Hange coming back for their late night, or early morning, rant about shit I never have the attention span to comprehend. Then another knock followed, and then a next. Which told me the person on the other side of that door was not Hange.

Who the fuck is it?

My suspicions were clearly incorrect as if it was Hange they would have busted down the door, despited the fact that everyone is asleep, and yelled my name to get my attention.

"I know you're in there." I pause at the voice, "Tch, the light is on, let me in L/n." That voice, the voice I crave more and more every time I hear it. But what was he doing up so late? When I didn't respond he probably got fed up and decided to invite himself in. The door slowly opened and I averted my gaze back to my work, he walked in closing the door behind him filling the room with a sense of long awaited company.

"What are you doing here at this hour?" He asked with a monotoned voice, I didn't reply. He sighed probably in defeat. The creaking of the floor followed as he stepped closer, soon he had pulled one of the chairs that settled itself in front of my work desk, taking a seat. He stared at me.

"Why aren't you in your room?" He asked his question again now in a different way, I remained silent for a bit then finally spoke.

"I could ask you the same thing, sir." He didn't say anything, he just sat there. Painful silence fell between us. My hand wobbled over the paper again, writing my name in the bottom right corner. I wouldn't dare lock eyes with his knowing that the outcome to that would be very destructive for my heart.

"I asked first, L/n." He spoke out after it felt like years.

"I had a few papers to finish." I say simply. "Your turn." He took a uncertain second before he let his lips part.

"I don't sleep." His comment caused for me to stop my hopeless scribbles, he probably noticed my hold and continued. "I'm insomniac." For a weird reason I wasn't surprised, it would explain his eye bags and the fact he has lavender oil by his bed.

But still it must irritated him.

Silence fell between us again and the only thing audible was the pencil against the white paper. He kept his voice hidden behind his soft lips but his eyes were drilling wholes through me. I wanted to speak to him, ask how he's feeling and ask about his thoughts. Curiosity was drowning me. But I didn't say a word. I couldn't.

His eyes left me and probably landed somewhere on my left since that was where most of the decor was focused on. When I was curtain he wasn't looking at me anymore I let myself peek a look at him, his face was almost relaxed which shocked me: his eyes were the slightly softer than what I'm used to seeing, his eyebrows weren't touching though they still looked irritated, his lips were relaxed from their constant straight line and they looked even more kissable now.

His jaw was the most defining part of his side profile, and the light from the candle that rested on my work desk made his skin look like shining gold. The bags under his eyes yelled 'let me sleep' which caused for me to feel sad for him. But I didn't know why. It was all Hange's fault really, they started the whole 'crush' talk and now it's getting to my head.

Yeah, it's getting to my head.

His face turned and he caught my eyes, he looked so tired not only drowsy but mentally exhausted too. I wonder if he knows that I can see that. He's always hiding away from people and I don't know if I'm the only one that sees his hidden self.

"Alright." I say smacking my hands against the surface of the table helping myself up. "It's time for your bedtime." I say walking over to the door, and right when I was about to put my hand onto the door knob I felt a painfully familiar presents on the other side of the wood. I froze, and my lungs refused to continue cooperating with me.

I stepped back away from it feeling my whole body shaking, I was stopped when my back made contact with something behind me. Levi was standing and staring at me like I had 'fuck me' written on my forehead. "L/n." He raised an eyebrow at my weird behaviour. He soon realised that I was in panic mode but still couldn't figure out why.

Once I calmed down a little bit I walked over to my dest and wrote onto a plain sheet of paper 'there's someone on the other side of the door, no one from HQ.' He read it then looked at me then at the door, it took a few seconds for him to comprehend what I was trying to say but once it clicked he grabbed my wrist then walked over to the door. His grip tight, as if he was afraid once he let go I would disappear.

The door opened and he peaked his head out looking down the hallway, he must have seen someone since he squeezed my wrist slightly. And before I could react I was being dragged across the hallway by him. When I realised the direction he was dragging me to it was too late to protest against it since he had already opened the door and shoved me inside, he turned back to the hallway looked around for a second then closed and locked the door.

"Sir?" I say confused, I found myself in the room from where this whole 'crush' thing started. Levi's room.

"You seem to know the person who was out there." He said taking off his jacket then placing it neatly on the chair a few steps from me.

"You saw him!" I say louder than intended.

"They're a him, huh." He said falling into deep thought after that.

"I'll discuss it with the Commander once he wakes up." I spoke making my way to the door to exit his room and make my way to my own. He stopped me with his words.

"Brat, do you really think it's a good idea to go back now? Whoever that was seemed like he wanted to give you a visit." He stopped to catch his breath. "He might be in your room waiting for you."

I knew that.

I was completely aware he was in my room waiting, but what else can I do but go back. Even if he was there I could take him, even if I'm only on two hours of sleep and a half loaf of bread.

"Stop being a dumb fuck and go take a damn shower." He leapt over to his dresser and took out a towel along with a shirt. He came back extending his hand for me to take what was inside it, then pointed to the door across the room from me. I looked at his clothes then at the door to the bathroom.

So he wants me to stay here....

I hesitatingly picked up the clothes then slowly made my way to the door. And as he told me, I took a shower, also washing my hair in the process. When I walked back out and into the room, Levi was on his chair reading, not noticing I reentered the room.

I stare at him for a little while before building up the courage to speak, "I'm done." I say, causing him to look up at me. His eyes trailed all over my body then he stood up without a word and went into the bathroom.

I sat myself on his bed, pulling the curtain a little to peek through the window. It was dark, really dark. Since I wasn't able to see anything I almost gave up and turned when a flash of light sparked in the distance with a loud growl that followed with a few seconds delay. The light allowed me to see a little and only then I realised it was pouring outside.

My eyes caught the stars on top of the darkness not emitting much light, though they were still as beautiful. On nights like these: where thunder and lightning haunts the sky's along with rain and wind, my mother would sneak into my room knowing I was terrified of thunder, and she would sing lullaby after lullaby until I fell asleep.

On these nights I wonder how she is, if she's ok, if she's asleep or if she's up worrying about me like I do with her. Even though I am not afraid of thunder anymore, though there are times where they startle me, I still wish she was here with me and that she could sing to me until I fell asleep.

My thoughts were interrupted by the bathroom door opening revealing a damped Levi, which I refused to give more than a glazed to knowing there would be consequences if I looked for too long. I heard him walking around the room behind me as I stargazed through his window. Soon he sat down and I finally turned to him.

He was on his chair with a book in his hands, along with a towel around his neck to prevent his beige long sleeved-shirt from getting wet. "What is that book about?"

"Haven't you finished yours?" He asked still looking at the words, I tilted my head wondering what he is talking about. "The book on your desk, Wuthering Heights"

Wait is that what that book is?

"Oh," I say thinking about the plot of the book, "I didn't take you for the hopeless romantic, sir." I say a smirk creeping onto my lips.

"It's only hopeless if you have no chance." His words somehow caused my heart to do a few flips. I knew he wasn't referring to me, he couldn't possibly, though I still felt myself getting caught up in his words.

It's only hopeless if you have no chance.

After a while of him reading and me just staring up at the ceiling, the familiar flash of light and the grumble of the sky that followed took me by surprise taking a small squeak out of me. And then another one followed, and another. When it stopped I felt eyes on me, I turned my head to those eyes.

"Don't you seem too old to be scared of thunder?" I stared at him looking for something to say to that.

"I'm not scared." I pout knowing that was not the complete truth. "Not like when I was younger anyway." He gave me a look like he wanted me to continue with my story, he was curious. It was strange seeing him intrigued in my past, though I continued nonetheless.

"When I was younger I hated thunder, with a passion. It was scary. On nights like these my mother would sneak into my room, snuggle next to me, and sing all the lullaby's she knew. I would tremble for hours before she came in to my rescue." I finished and he looked satisfied, he really wanted to know that badly?

"What about your mother?" I regretted my question the second I saw the pain in his eyes. "You don't have to answer that, it's ok!" I sat back up, with my legs crisscrossed, trying to take my words back. His gaze left mine so I couldn't see what he was feeling. Silence captured the both of us.

"She was an amazing women. Though I don't remember her very well since she died when I was 6, the things I do remember are nice memories I suppose. I grew up in the underground so there were a lot of nights where fat bigs would start fights outside my home. On those kind of nights she would tell me to cover my ears as she played with my hair until I fell asleep."

I don't know how to respond to that.

This little bit of information that he had just given me caused for me to crave more, I wanted to know more. I wanted to know how young Levi was and how he was when he first joined the scouts, I wanted to know what he was feeling right in this moment and what he is thinking. Why he never talks about himself, why he never lets people see him hopeless. I wanted to know about the people that he knew before, the people he has lost and how they were. I wanted to ask so many questions about his previous life and how his life was in the underground. I wondered if he knew about my fathers mafia or not, if he ever encountered people like my father, or if he himself had a father.

I craved for answers but I knew I wouldn't get any, he is tired and probably doesn't even comprehend the fact he just told me a little part of his life. He might not even remember it when he wakes up. Though to me, this moment is everything. I know I have feelings for him, I know it and I think that I've had them for so much longer than a few months, but I can't. I have to stay away from these growing feelings. I know it will only hurt him and hurt me. I can't let him get hurt by my stupid feelings, I can't.

I won't make the same mistake twice.

He released a heavy breath then placed something in between the pages of the book. "My mother gave me this book, she would read it to me every night. It was the only book she ever owned." He gave me another small bit of him. He stood up placing the book on top of the dresser, then reaching for the lavender oil that was in the same place as last time I was in here. He walked over to me placing some of it on his finger then under his nose, then proceeded to hand the glass bottle to me so I could do the same.

After I handed it back to him he put it back in it's place then walked back over to me. I looked at him and he looked at me, I wasn't sure what he was about to do but I soon found out. He leaned down flopping himself onto his bed as I just stared, he tucked himself under the covers and adjusted the single pillow so that he could place his head on it. Though the majority of it was left empty.

He didn't speak and neither did I. Was he going to sleep here? I was still sat up on the bed not knowing either to lay down or get up. "I can sleep on the floor if you don't want me sleeping in the same bed as you." He said in a low, tired voice his eyes closed. I didn't reply. I didn't want him to sleep on the floor, he looked tired and plus it was his bed I was in. Though I didn't know if I could handle sleeping next to him.

After a while I finally build up the courage to lay down, my back was pressed against the wall behind me leaving a good amount of space between us not wanting to cross any boundaries. Right when I wasn't expecting it another growl came from outside which made me jump. I squeezed my eyes shut as a few more followed.

I felt a weighted warmth around my shoulder, Levi was hugging me. My body stiffened as his hand come over my right ear whilst my other one was pressed against the pillow. The growls from outside now muffled. After a few minutes I leaned into his touch, his cold fingers over my head and the warmth of his palm gave me comfort.

I found myself pressing my own hand over his head, tangling my fingers into his damp hair. My body relaxed and all I wanted was for this moment to never end. To stay like this, Levi's touch and my hands on him stealing all the warmth from him, it felt.. right. It was weird but this feeling. This feeling felt right.

It felt like home.

________________________________________
[time skip]

An irritating warm light on my face forced the peaceful and well needed sleep away from me, my body shifted trying to get away from the bright sun and go back to my dreams. But to no avail. I opened my eyes to find myself in a different room than my own yet it was still familiar, flashbacks from a few hours ago rushed into my head and, once again, my face flushed a bright red.

I sat up rubbing my hand on my face when I heard a door open from my side. Levi. He was standing in the doorway of the bathroom staring at me: he had his uniform already on, his straps and belts, along with his jacket which rested on his forearm and a towel in his hand.

"Finally wake are we?" He spoke in a different tone, similar from a few hours ago. He wiped his mouth with the towel then placed it down onto the sink somewhere near him, though he still had dark circles under his eyes he didn't seem as tired as he usually does.

He walked around the room putting his jacket on, then walking over to where his extremely clean boots were. He sat down on the edge of the bed and started to put on his boots. I just stared at him the whole time, not saying a word.

When he finished he looked up at me with no emotion. "How did you sleep?" He asked which seemed strange coming from him, I couldn't ever imagine him asking about someone else's sleep or well being, yet here we are.

"To be honest, that was one of the best night's sleep of my life." I reply truthfully. He didn't smile but his eyes did show a small little glow at my response. "What about you?" I asked not only out of politeness but mainly of curiosity.

"I haven't slept over three hours since I was a child." That reply made me happy, a smile creeped onto my face without intention though I let it hang there for a bit. I look over to the window and it seemed a little too bright outside for it to be the normal time I'm supposed to wake up at.

"What's the time..?" I say slowly trying to figure it out for myself. He didn't answer. I shot my eyes back at him with a raised eyebrow now replacing the smile from before. "Sir..?" He turned his head to the door.

"Nine thirty." My eyes widen when he finally let out the answer to my question.

"NINE!" I say loudly. "Why didn't you wake me up! I had to train the cadets ONE AND A HALF HOUR AGO!" I shuffle my way from under the covers and right when I was about to leap out of the bed I remembered something. I have nothing but a shirt and underwear on. I pushed myself back down, covering myself with the blanket, and crossing my arms over my chest letting a pout settle on my face.

"Don't worry." He said not fazed by my outburst, "I asked Mike to cover for you." I looked at him with knitted eyebrows trying to look mad at him.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" I say. Even though I was upset, I was a little glad he didn't wake me up since I actually didn't have to run after 15 year olds around HQ.

"I couldn't bring myself to wake you." He looked at me once again and now all the anger, which wasn't much, evaporated out of me and left a soft feeling behind. We just stared at each other engulf in each other's eyes. Once again I didn't want this moment to end.

The door flung open taking away my moment sooner than I'd wished. "Y/N ARE YOU IN HERE?" Hange shouted from the doorway, we both shot our heads to them. "Oh I guess you really were in here." They said about to step inside the room.

"DONT TAKE ANOTHER FUCKING STEP!" Levi shouted with a poisonous tone at them causing for them to stop midway of a step, their leg hung in the air. "Tch, take off your damn shoes." Hange stepped back, untied their boots, then placed them on a small mat next to the door where some of Levi's shoes were: spotless compared to Hange's muddy ones.

They walked in, showing off their miss matching yellow and purple socks, stopping a few meters away from us. "First Erwin. Now I find the two of you in the same room, and it seems Y/n spent the night." They said the last bit in a 'you guys fucking?' tone. They smirked widely, their eyes flicking between the two of us. "Did you too have fun last-"

"HANGE!" I shout at them before they could finish their sentence. "No we did not." I say sternly. Though part of me kind of wished we had. Their face dropped slightly looking a bit disappointed.

"What do you want." Levi stated more than asked.

"Well, I was talking to Erwin and we found it weird how neither you nor Y/n were at breakfast so I went to visit her at the training grounds. But she was not there." They grinned. "So I wanted to check here before going to her room. And here she is. Hehe." I rolled my eyes at the look on their face.

"Tch. Well you found her so get out." He got up looking pissed now, like always.

"Oh no, I could leave if you'd like. Let the two of you finish-"

"No." Both me and Levi said at the same time. I sigh getting up and heading for the door, I had to change and then go see Erwin. I looked back at Hange motioning with my head for them to follow, they grabbed their boots not even putting them on and marched out of there after me.

We got to my room and I let them come inside. "Why so in a hurry all of a sudden?" They asked.

"I need to speak to Erwin." My words must have come out a bit too quickly as their joy turned to concern.

"What's going on..." I can't tell them. Not yet. He might be outside my door or my window, having him know I know he's there puts everyone here in danger. I shook my head letting them know I'll tell them later.

________________________________________
[time skip]

Hange trailed behind me as I speed walked down the corridors, they gave me plenty of 'what the fuck' looks and to be honest I don't know how I'm going to tell them the truth about me. Are they going to be disappointed in me for keeping this away from them for so long? Or are they going to be scared? What if they don't want to see me ever again?

I couldn't help but let all these questions rush through my head as I tried to get to Erwin's office. I stopped. The door which was separating me and the man who can either save me and my mothers life, or destroy it. I didn't even bother with knocking and just burst in through the door.

"Y/n?" Blue eyes met mine and I know he knew. Hange walked in and I walked back checking the hallway before closing and locking the door. Levi was already in the room, he was leaning against the book shelf on the left side of the room. It seemed that the two of them were talking about something since Erwin had his body twisted in Levi's direction on his chair.

He looked all over my face looking for reassurance that what he thought was about to come out my mouth was only his imagination. I wish it was only my imagination. A little scenario I made up in my head, one where I can wake up from. I wish I could tell him this isn't true. I wish I could shout out 'IM SAFE' but I'm not, I'm not safe. Nor is he, or Levi neither is Hange. The cadets are possibly in danger, but most of all. My mother.

Mother.

"He's... he's found me." My voice trembled. I've been preparing for this day ever since I left, though I never actually believed it would happen, especially this early.
Erwin's face was now serious, he believed me even though he didn't even want to. "Erwin my mother!" In this moment she was the only person I was thinking about. What if they got to her before they got to me? And what if they've killed her? What if he fucking killed her?!

"WE NEED TO GO GET HER PLEASE-"

"We will depart first thing tomorrow." Relief rushed all over me, I know I shouldn't be relived it still could be that she's not even still alive. Yet I was still glad that he agreed.

Mother I'm coming for you.

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[Author note]

Hello yall, I'm so sorry for not posting for so long I really don't have much of an excuse is more like my brain hates me. But here it is. I will try to upload more frequently as I've finished my mocks and two of my GCSEs, but we all know I failed, but no promises.

I hope y'all guys like it and sorry for the mistakes it's late and I really don't want to read this more than once<3

Have a fantastic day or night.:)

Vote plz.