PLEASE READ!!

Hey Guys. So I just quickly have to preface this chapter by warning you that there is a part of this chapter where Acacia dreams about when she was raped for the first time. However, I've written it in italics so if you wish to not read it, you can skip ahead and you will know which part to skip ahead to. If you do choose to read it, I have warned you so don't go commenting that you didn't want to read about it.

Anyway, let's get on with the chapter and I'll talk to you afterwards haha

Thanks,

- Allamy xx

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I close my eyes and breathe for a moment. I decided then and there that I'm not ready to tell him everything. I don't trust him yet.

Something could happen. He could hurt me. Plus, I know that if I try to tell him the whole thing, I might have another panic attack.

"Ten years ago," I sign nervously, looking at Grayson.

"I was kidnapped by some rogues who had attacked my pack. I was eight and I've been held by them ever since. I would be given hardly any food, I was beaten and tortured on a daily basis and apart from the other day, the only other time I have been in my wolf form was when I shifted for the first time maybe about a year ago."

I watch as Grayson's mouth drops open in shock before his expression darkens and the bed beneath me vibrates as he lets out a low growl.

Fuck. He's going to beat me. Just like the rogues.

I whimper and cover my face with my hands in fear. I wait for the impact but it never comes.

Instead, he gently touches my arms and pulls my hands gently away from my face. He gives me an apologetic look before gently taking his hands away. A flash of sadness appears in his expression and disappears just as quickly as it arrived.

"I'm sorry. Please continue" he signs with a small smile. I nod, taking a moment to recollect myself.

"The other day, I was able to escape. Another group of rogues attacked us and the guards watching me left my cell door wide open so I took the opportunity to run while I could. I ran for what seemed like forever and I was surprised I hadn't died yet. I slowed down to have a break when I was tackled by who I assume was one of your men and I've been here ever since" I reply, tears welling in my eyes.

God, I miss my family. Plus, Zane and his rogues are probably looking for me. I watch Grayson as he sits back and processes what I've just said. His expression darkens and I whimper.

"What did they do to you?" he signs back as his eyes start changing into a silver colour.

Suddenly, the memories flash before my eyes.

The beating. The torture. The rape. The rape was the worst of them all. I look down at my hands as tears start to fall from my eyes.

Not wanting to make him angrier, I lift up my shirt just enough so that he can see my stomach, just above my belly button. I look down and see the scars and the bruises and cuts and I know he can see them too.

Tears falling harder, I put my shirt back down and pull back the blankets, moving my legs apart so that he can see my inner thighs which are peppered with humongous bruises and bite marks all the way down to my knees.

Suddenly, he lets out a terrifying growl, the vibrations rattling my core. I watch as he stands up, causing the chair to fall backwards from the force. His eyes are completely silver at this point and I'm scared.

He's going to hurt me.

I whimper and start to uncontrollably shake.

I watch as he growls again and storms out of the room. I crumble into a ball on my bed and Teresa quickly rushes in and holds me.

I eventually stop crying and she sits me up and gives me a worried look.

"What happened?" she signs, nervously.

"I told him what happened and he asked what the rogues did to me so I showed him all the bruises and cuts and bite marks and I think he lost it. I thought he must've not noticed them all when he first saw me but apparently not. I thought he was going to hurt me but he just growled and stormed out of the room" I reply, shakily.

She hugs me again and gives me an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry Acacia. Please know he's trying."

"He is? Why would he do that?"

"Because he wants to make this work. Yes, he is struggling with the whole situation right now and I know you're scared but he'll come around"

"And if he doesn't?"

"He will. Trust me. It might just take some time. Just like it will take time for you to trust him. Thank you for trying though" she signs with a small smile. I nod as more tears slip from my eyes. She hands me a tissue and I wipe them away and blow my nose.

"How about we do something to take your mind off everything?" she signs, her smile returning before she gets up and exits the room. She quickly returns with a wheelchair and I give her a confused look.

"Would you like to go to the library for the afternoon? We have a beautiful one in the pack village" she signs with now a full grin on her face. I smile and nod at the idea. I haven't been to a library since I was a child. I used to love the library in my old packs village. I spent many hours there with my family, learning how to read and appreciate language and literature despite not being able to hear it aloud. I was always above my age in reading level, but now that I'm eighteen, I'm going to be well behind. My smile falters at the thought but quickly disappears completely when I realise there will be other people there at the library.

"Will there be other people?" I sign nervously.

"Don't worry, I've just mind-linked the pack and told them that the library is out of bounds until tomorrow. You'll have the place to yourself" she replies before she helps me into the wheelchair as I don't have a lot of strength.

"Thank you, Teresa. I really appreciate it."

She grins at me as she wheels the IV rack next to me and tells me to hold it so she can push me.

Turns out the library is right next door to the hospital so we get there in no time.

I find some books I want to try and read before she wheels me over to one of the couches and helps me sit down. I haven't had to read anything properly in ten years so this is going to be difficult but I'm excited to try.

"I have to go check on some other patients but I'll be back later to check on you," she says smiling before heading out and leaving me to it. I pick up my first book which is a picture book about the mate bond that Teresa picked out for me as a good introductory book.

She told me it would help me understand everything without too much difficulty reading-wise and would answer some of my questions so I agreed to read it. I open the beautiful glossy cover and start to read.

It's later in the evening now and I'm back in my bed, curled up in my blankets with my fourth book of the day. I haven't seen Grayson since I told him about some of my past but every so often pain shoots through my chest.

He's hurting and it's starting to make me upset. This is why I shouldn't have told him because now he's upset and it's my fault.

Everything is always my fault. I look up from my book as Teresa walks over to me.

"Hey love, it's getting late. You should get some rest" she signs with a small smile. I nod and set my book down on the table next to me.

"If you need me, just press the button on the side of your table and I'll be here" she signs, smiling before hugging me gently.

"Goodnight Acacia."

"Goodnight" I sign back before she turns and walks out of the room. I smile and snuggle under the blankets as I feel the sleepiness wash over me and within minutes I'm out.

I watch the guards grin wickedly as I cower in the corner of my cell shaking, tears falling from my eyes.

I can tell they are talking about me which is never good. I'm used to being beaten and tortured at this point as they do it on a daily basis so I wouldn't be surprised if that's what they are about to do.

But sadly, this is my reality and something that no one should have to experience. Ever.

Suddenly, the door opens and the leader, who I've come to know as Zane - through lip-reading - walks into the room with a sick grin on his face. He talks with the guards for a moment before they exit the room, leaving me all by myself with him.

Zane has beaten and tortured me before and he is worse than the others but I'm used to it now.

I watch as he takes his shirt off and chucks it on the floor. He smirks as he unlocks the cell door and walks in. He grabs my wrists and handcuffs me in silver before chaining me up against the wall.

I start to bawl my eyes out in fear and pain and he growls, instantly shutting me up. He smirks and starts to kiss my neck. I whimper and he slaps me.

Silently, tears roll down my face as I stand there. He starts to suck on my neck and I know I'll have marks and bruises after this. Not the worse thing though, I guess.

Suddenly, he rips my shirt clean off my body before doing the same with my pants, leaving me standing there in only my underwear. Fabric burns sear on my skin from where the fabric was pulled tight.

I know I've spoken too soon.

He starts to touch me, running his hands all over my body. I shake in fear but at this point, he doesn't care. He continues to get more aggressive, creating new bruises all over my torso.

He sucks on my skin and I whimper. He glares at me and slaps me again before going back to what he was doing.

I want him to stop but I know that if I fight, he'll hurt me even more. He could kill me. I learned that lesson the hard way and I don't really want to end up back in the dingy hospital again.

The consequences for that weren't pretty.

He continues to suck on me before ripping my underwear off, grinning wickedly. He drops his pants and puts a rubber thing on his manhood and my stomach drops.

Oh god.

I know what is about to happen.

Sex was never a particularly taboo subject in my old pack. The teenagers were educated about it in our school.

I was a nosy child. Always sneaking into the school's classes when I was little. I never understood what a lot of it meant, but this I remember.

Rape.

I scream and thrash around, the silver burning at my wrists. Out of the corner of my eye, I see him laugh and instantly he's in front of me.

He covers my mouth with his hand and smashes my head against the wall. I whimper and tears run down my face. He spreads my legs apart and I try to move but his other hand flies into my hips.

He flashes a sick grin and then inserts himself into me.

Pain shoots through me and I scream into his hand. He growls and starts to thrust in and out of me, his pace quickening with every stroke.

Tears trickle down my face and I feel myself zoning out. He growls with pleasure but my body is numb at this point.

Here I am, Acacia Violet Blackwell, being raped by the rogue that kidnapped me and no one is here to save me.

I'm going to die here. I accept that now.

He continues and the pain between my legs worsens as does his grip on my mouth and hips.

Please moon goddess. Anyone.

Help me.

I wake up screaming and bawling my eyes out. I reach over and grab the container off the table and proceed to vomit up stomach acid.

Teresa rushes in looking startled and runs over to me to hold my hair back. She rubs my back and I eventually stop but the tears continue to fall.

She takes the container from me and puts it in the bathroom before walking back over to me and sitting down.

"What happened, Acacia?" she signs, a worried expression on her face.

"I had a nightmare" I sign back shaking.

"What happened in the dream?"

"It was the first time I was raped" I reply back, causing me to start hyperventilating.

She quickly calms me down by squeezing me into a tight hug.

"The pack that kidnapped you, they did this?"

"Yes. The leader was the one that raped me"

"I'm so sorry hun. If you don't mind me asking, how often were you raped?"

"Often. Maybe two or three times a week at a guess. I'm not really sure how old I was the first time it happened. My guess is maybe about fifteen, but I could be completely wrong."

"Oh my god. I'm so sorry Acacia. Did you bleed at all outside of your period?"

"My period?"

"The process where from puberty until menopause, you discharge blood and other materials every month as a result of a lack of a fertilised egg."

"Oh right. I don't know if I've actually had a period at all"

"Okay, what makes you say that?"

"Well, you asked if I bled outside of my period?"

"Yes?"

"I just used to bleed all the time. So yes, I did bleed outside of my period. But I also couldn't tell you if or when I got my period each month either"

"Oh god. That's awful. Did he do anything about your constant bleeding?"

"No, nothing. I used to think I was broken. Dying from the inside out" I reply shakily. She hugs me again and wipes away my tears.

"Well, I don't think you are broken. As well as the resident doctor, I'm also the pack's gynaecologist so I can take a look and see if there's anything wrong if you want me to. Might help to give you some peace of mind?" she asks with a concerned face on.

I nod, nerves coursing through my body and pull back the covers of my bed before slipping my underwear off. I don't really want to be showing her but I know it's the best thing for my health so I just have to get over myself for a moment and let her help. Teresa examines me both internally and externally before looking up at me. I pull my underwear back on and watch her carefully.

"You're not broken. You just have severe internal and external bruising and swelling, hence the horrible amounts of bruising on your lower abdomen. You also have multiple vaginal tears which explain the constant bleeding. Apart from those things, you seem okay. If you just rest and don't have sex for a while, they should heal soon and the bruising will disappear" she signs with a small smile.

I nod as I take in the information.

"Did he use condoms at all?" she signs after a moment.

"What are condoms?" I ask, confused.

"Condoms are a rubber latex tube that a person puts on their penis to protect both parties during sex."

"Oh okay. Yeah, he did."

"Well, at least he did one thing to keep you somewhat safe. If he hadn't used them, he could have gotten you pregnant or given you many different sexually transmitted infections" she replies. I nod and sink back into my bed, suddenly becoming very tired.

"Go back to sleep love" she signs as she stands up and pulls my covers up. I nod and she signs goodnight before heading out of the room.

Another rush of pain shoots through my body.

Grayson.

I whimper and a part of me wishes he was here. I sigh before rolling over and drift back off to sleep.

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Hey Guys,

So I hope you enjoyed that chapter! I made it a long one because for the next week, I am really busy and the updates will be really slow if any at all. Anyway, what did you think of the chapter? Please vote and comment letting me know what you think!

If you feel so inclined, go follow me on my Instagram account @allamy_duffell for a look into my life outside of writing!

Thanks,

- Allamy xx