Well that baby grew into a boy. He was my pride and joy.

We moved into an apartment of our own.

I fell in love and by the time that boy was five, I was married.

I decided not to have children with my husband and he felt perfectly fine with that. My little Will was just enough for both of us.

On his 10th birthday I got him an xbox and he was sooooo happy. I felt the joy that I could never dreamed of feeling. I love of a mother.

"Mom?"

"Yeah Will?"

"Why do you look out windows and talk to God?"

"Because baby, I asked for help and I got it. I wouldn't be here today if I hadn't looked out windows and talked to God."

"Maybe I should talk to God too..."

"What would you talk about?"

He hopped up and went to the window

"Dear God...Are you real? If you are...I love you and thank you for giving me the best mommy in the world."

I smile and watch a Will walks over and sits beside me.

"I love you Will."

"I love you too mom" he hugs me tight.

"Oh I bet you can hug tighter then that!" I laugh "Gimme a bear hug!"

"ooooohhhhh" he hugs me as tight as he can. I laugh and kiss my little angels forehead.

When will was 17 he had a girlfriend named lyra. She was beautiful. She had long dark curls and pretty green eyes and the most breath taking smile ever seen.

When he was 20 he proposed to her.

Two months later they had a grand wedding. My husband Jason and I went to the wedding...Will made a speech just for me.

"Ladies and gentlemen. I would like to make a toast to my mother, Noel. She is a strong and independent woman and is the best thing that has made my life what it is today. I'm not good at these spech things mom...I'm sorry about that. I love you mom. Forever...Forever and always." He looked at me as he said the last part and I burst into tears. Happy tears.

See even when things got down...they always got back up. God is real. He is as real as anything. Yes, we may not see him. May not even hear him. But he is there. He hears us.

When I was 87..my Jason had died of cancer. I lived with Will and Lyra and their babies Jacob, Anna, and Lily. It was an amazing elaborate house in Florida...a paradise. Great for getting my mind off my passing husband...I knew that his time was near and so did he...I knew he was living better with no more pain now..so I embraced that...

"Maw Maw?" asked Lily

"Yes dear?"

"Can you give me a makeover and then have a tea party with me?"

"Lily pad, of course I will." I was old...J was weak...I wasn't able to move as well as I used to. "You have to go get the tea though dear, is that ok?"

"Yes maw maw." She smiles brightly and Will walked into the room.

"Hiya Will."

"Hi mom" He looks at me with concern "How are you feeling?"

"Oh im just fine. Just a little old" I laugh. He smiles then comes over and kisses my cheek.

"I just worry mom, I just worry."

When I was 98 I had became too weak to stay at the house and my health was failing. I was basically living at the hospital. Lily and Will visited every day and Lyra and the other visited at least once a week.

One day lily and Will were on either side of the bed. Lily was looking at the very faint white lines on my arm.

"Maw maw? What are these marks from?"

"Oh...I'm getting old...you might as well learn my story before I pass." I sigh.

"Mom.." said Will. "Please don't talk like that."

"Oh shes not a little girl anymore, she knows what will happen one day."

"Whats your story maw maw?"

"When I was six...my father came home very drunk...me and my poor mother were bloody and broken on the inside and outside that night, I watched my father do horrible things to my mom. My mother was trying to protect me. Years later my father had gone away and my mom and I were broke and depressed. I started high school and I was bullied a lot. My mom had to work all the time so no one was there for me. I fell in love with someone named David...when he saw my cuts on my birthday he broke up with me. My mother remarried to a man named Gavin. Gavin helped me stop cutting. He made me promise. The day he found out about these small lines, they were big bloody ones. It was the first time I had ever talked to God. He answered my prayers almost immediately. For the next two years I was actually happy until one night when I decided one drink was alright...next thing you know, little Will came into this world and I was alone and afraid and I had no where to go...I prayed to God and he took his time in answering my prayers this time. But they were answered. My angel grew up and found a beautiful wife and had three beautiful children." I released my tears down my wrinkled cheeks and smile.

"I don't ever want you to make the same mistakes I have...never grow up too fast and make sure your children's lives are even better than yours ever was. Learn to love little things in life and pray to God when you need help. He was all I had and here I am 99 years old! Always remember that just when the caterpillar thought all was over, it became a butterfly."

I look and see both of them crying. "Don't cry for your old lady dear. Im not worth the precious tears."

"No mom...your worth so much more."

"Maw maw...I don't want you to die. I need you...what am I gonna do without you?"

"You my sweet Lily, will never be alone..." I have a silent sob. "I will always be with you," I poke her with a shakey finger, "In there, in your heart. Lily, Forever...Forever and always."

"Oh maw maw" she sobs and hugs me.

This was God love to me.