THE FIRST DAY OF HIGH-SCHOOL FELT completely different after meeting Felix. He would throw up his arm and ask questions that made the rest of the class laugh or frustrated Miss Whitman. I don't know why I thought he'd be a jerk, most rich guys were. Not that I even knew many rich guys.

     After art class finished we collected our things and on my way out the door Felix smiled at me.

     "See you around, Maggie!" he said.

     I lifted up my hand to wave at him. I willed my mouth to say something, to be charming and social, but no sound came out.

     Lunchtime rolled around. It wasn't like lunchtime at my old school; the cafeteria was sleek, modern, and trendy. Stark whites with vibrant greens, plenty of fresh plants, and potted herbs grown by the students themselves using hydroponics. Scientific, but artfully beautiful at the same time.

     Meals came encased in black bento boxes and there was a box for vegans, gluten-allergies, nut-allergies, and every other type of food requirement. Water was free, filtered, and in fresh abundance. It felt like I was on a science research spaceship.

     "Wow," Lizzy said at my side.

     We were in line paying for our lunch boxes and still in shock about how different PS&A was from regular schools.

     "This school is kind of like . . . a job. It reminds me of the cafeteria at my dad's work," Lizzy observed.

     I nodded. "This place offers you a job with Paulsen Research after graduation. So, I guess it is like raising up your own employees in a weird kind of way."

     "All I want is to work in the same department as my dad someday," her eyes lit up. "Can you picture that? A father-daughter duo taking on the world of chemistry and improving humanity together."

     "My dad wishes I was more like you," I said and hunted down the nearest empty table for us.

     "Are your parents still giving you a hard time about studying art?" Lizzy asked while opening up her lunch to sample it.

     I shrugged my shoulders. I didn't really want to talk about it so I changed the subject. "I met Felix Paulsen. He's in my art class."

     "What?" Lizzy choked. "What was he doing in art class? His dad's company focuses on scientific research."

     "Maybe he doesn't want to walk in his dad's shadow," I was talking more about myself than Felix.

     Lizzy looked stung. She took what I said in a completely different way. "Well some of us are perfectly okay being in our parents' shadow."

     "I didn't mean it like that, Lizzy," I said apologetically.

     "I know," she said and smiled to let me know it really was okay. "I guess Natalie isn't joining us for lunch."

     "What makes you say that?" I asked.

     Lizzy pointed to something behind me. I swiveled my whole body around to spy back towards the check-out line. Natalie was there, laughing and playing with a strand of her hair while talking to Felix. For a moment, all I could think about was how Felix spoke my name.

     I quickly tried to focus on my lunch and not the two of them. "Well, she did say that she wanted to date him."

     "Natalie always gets what she wants," Lizzy said bitterly.

     I nudged Lizzy's shoulder. "Come on, we're her friends. We should support her if she likes this guy."

     Lizzy rolled her eyes. "Please, if she had a crush on a guy like a normal girl I'd be happy for her. She wants him just for his money and position. I didn't think she'd turn into one of those girls."

     "Those girls?"

     "My step-mom told me that she used to be a groupie when she was young. All she cared about was being close to a celebrity at any cost. She spent a lot of time and money to look pretty enough to get their attention. Sometimes it cost her dignity or her self-respect, but in exchange, she got fancy dinners, hotel rooms, and designer bags. She was one of those girls. Then she met my nerdy dad and everything changed. So no, I'm not going to support Natalie selling her self-respect for a Gucci bag," Lizzy smiled at me and crunched down on one of the carrots from her vegan box.

     I dared myself to watch Natalie and Felix. They looked good together, picture-perfect kind of good. I didn't agree with Lizzy; if being one of those girls made Natalie happy, then I'd still support her.

     Felix sat at a table with a group of older students and Natalie waved goodbye to him and worked her way over to our table. She slid her bento box beside mine and took a seat so close to me that she leaned in to rest her head on my shoulder.

     "He is perfect," Natalie sighed.

     I laughed but kept eating my lunch. Lizzy didn't say anything and definitely didn't look as amused as I was.

     "I'm serious. He is so funny and friendly, I'm really surprised," Natalie said.

     "Yeah, I was surprised too!" I said quickly without thinking.

     Natalie's whole demeanor changed to look more territorial. "What do you mean? When did you meet him?"

     "He's . . . in my art class."

     "Really? I should have taken art class . . . " Natalie's voice trailed and then she grinned at me. "But this is a good thing. You can help me. Find out what he likes or doesn't like and tell me."

     "No! You ask him."

     "I can't, he'll think I'm trying too hard. I want it to just naturally look like I have the same interests as him. Maggie, we're best friends for life. Please?" she begged.

     " . . . alright. But just for the first week because—"

     Natalie squealed and hugged me before I could even finish speaking. I could see disapproval written all over Lizzy's face. I should have really listened to Lizzy, but I thought I was the one doing the right thing. It's funny how good and bad choices are really a matter of which side of the fence you live on. At the time, I honestly wanted to help Natalie and Felix be a couple.

     I didn't know the thing that would rip them apart . . . was me.

"SO WE MET IN ART CLASS," he says to me for confirmation, like a journalist writing down facts.

     I nod. Talking about the past makes me feel tired, it's like reliving everything all over again. I shiver and sink my fingers into the material of the fuzzy chair to warm them. Snow is falling outside the large window and sunset is forming in the distance. I'm still sitting across from the boy that looks like Felix. I feel like I'm faced with the Yam and Cindy scenario all over again.

     "Can I call you something other than Felix?" I ask him.

     "Why?" he asks with innocent curiosity.

     "It's just easier for me," I say and it's not a lie. "I mean, do you feel like a Felix? If you could have any name in the world, what name would you choose?"

     He looks like he has to think about it for way too long. The real Felix was always quick to answer, he had an answer for everything. They weren't always the right answer, but still.

     "Torsten," he says.

     I can't help, but smile. "But that's already your middle name."

     "I like Torsten," he says a little defensively.

     I laugh. Whoa, it's the first time I've laughed in six months. I haven't felt the urge to since Felix's death. I shut my eyes tightly and decide that when I reopen them, I will be having a conversation with Torsten and not with Felix.

     I open my eyes. Torsten stares back at me. I feel more at ease now. I remind myself of what my mother had once told me—to think of him as a twin. Physically identical, but his own person.

     "Do you get bored in here?" I make an attempt to get to know things about Torsten.

     Torsten takes a moment to study all the various things in his expensive room. There are several books; old stories re-printed in stylish new covers. He has a large television with several different game consoles. There are a lot of things he has that most seventeen-year-old boys could only dream of. Maybe it's stupid of me to ask if he gets bored.

     "Not bored, just confused. I don't remember any of the things I enjoyed doing. My parents tell me I liked studying and video  games, but I don't feel any different when I do those things."

     "Monopoly," I say thoughtfully.

     Torsten's dark eyes look like they're growing. "Monopoly . . . " he repeats.

     It's almost cute. Almost.

     "Felix played—I mean you played video games but loved board games the most. Do you want to know why?" And I can't help smiling, despite myself.

     "Yes. Tell me."

IT WAS MY SECOND DAY AT PS&A ACADEMY. Natalie gave me a shortlist of three things to ask Felix before and after art class. Three questions seemed simple enough; three a day for five days. I could do it.

     I went to art class early that day and tried to keep my nerves calm. I was an introvert, just saying hello to someone challenged me. I mouthed the first question over and over again and decided that maybe it'd be easier if I didn't make eye contact with him.

     "Hey Maggie," Felix said warmly.

     Whoa, when had he arrived? Did he see me memorizing my list?

     "Oh, hey!" Completely embarrassed, I crumpled up the note and sat on it. I broke my own rule and unintentionally locked gazes with him.

     "I didn't know we needed to take notes for art class," he said, still friendly as ever.

     "What kind of games do you like?" I blurted out.

     We both looked surprised, maybe I was a little more mortified than him though. Dimples formed at the sides of his cheeks and he rested his elbows on his desk to lean towards me.

     "I could tell you or you could guess my favorite type of games correctly and you'll win a prize." He smiled like we were already playing a game.

     I just needed an answer, not a prize. Why couldn't I just have told him that? Instead, I actually tried to think of what type of game a guy like him would play. Class started and throughout it, every time the teacher wasn't looking I dared to whisper a guess to him.

     "Racing games?" I asked first.

     "Nope."

     "Adventure games?" I asked second.

     "Nope!"

     "Shooter games?" I felt hopeful.

    "I'll give you one hint and one last guess," Felix said. "Think of the answer from an artist's point of view instead of what guys typically like."

     I didn't make any more guesses for the rest of the class. Miss Whitman placed an apple on a pedestal and gave us the assignment to portray the still life in any drawn or painted style we preferred. She wanted us to give her a glimpse into how we viewed the world.

      Amanda started to work on a quick sketch of the apple exactly as it appeared. Kevin went for a comic-book style approach to the apple. I sketched out an apple core, the sad empty remains of a once juicy and inviting snack. Curiously, I peeked over at Felix's sketch. It was . . . a computer.

     "The world saw an apple, Steve Jobs saw a computer," Felix explained with a wink.

     I tried not to laugh, but it was really hard.

     After class ended we collected our things and I decided to make my final guess before it would be too late.

     "Felix," I quietly spoke his name, but it was enough to get his attention.

     "Hm?"

     "Your favorite type of game is a board game. Since you replaced the apple with a computer, you don't like playing by the rules and video games enforce rules. In a board game, there's no one to stop you from making up your own rules."

     Felix looked bewildered, I didn't know if that was good or bad. The warning bell rang, we had three minutes to get to our next class and Felix still hadn't said anything. By this point, I was flustered and tried to cover up my mistake.

     "Sorry, I guess that was the wrong answer. I didn't mean to assume anything I just—"

     "You guessed right."

     It was my turn to look stunned. "What?"

     He smiled, broad and beautiful. "I said, you guessed it right. No one has ever been able to figure out the answer before. You got the reason right too."

     I opened my mouth, but couldn't think of what to say. The classroom had already cleared out, only Felix and I remained.

     "Why an apple core?" he asked.

     It took a few seconds before it dawned on me that he was talking about my stupid little sketch. My artwork had always been a private thing, but I tried to break out of my shell with PS&A and make it more of a public thing. I still wasn't used to people actually seeing it and analyzing it.

     "Everyone focuses on how juicy and delicious the apple looks, they use it and then they throw away what's left. The apple exists just to be used," I said.

     "That's how I feel most of the time," he confessed. His face looked concerned and whatever was on his mind he didn't share it. Instead, he held out his hand and made a grabby finger gesture. "Let me give you your prize. Hand me your phone."

     Curiously, I complied and passed my blue glitter and butterfly covered phone to him. He messed around with it and snapped a picture of himself smiling. When he was done he handed it back to me. The screen glowed with his face and his phone number in bold text below it. I stared at the screen and didn't notice the flash until it was too late. Felix had snapped a candid photo of me.

     "We should go. I'll text you later Maggie."

     I lifted my hand and for the first time was able to actually say a proper goodbye to him.

     "See you, Felix."

     That night Natalie texted me asking how things went and if I got an answer to any of her questions. I lied and told her that I hadn't. The answer felt too personal to share with her and it wouldn't have been fair to Felix.

     As I laid in my bed and gazed up at my bedroom ceiling I felt my phone vibrate in the palm of my hand. I held the phone up to my face and saw a text from Felix. It was a picture of him holding an apple core while leaning over a tray of moss. The caption stated: "Planting Apple Seeds".

     I smiled until my cheeks hurt. I was sure it couldn't hurt to respond back, it seemed rude not to.

     [Me: Why are you planting apple seeds?]

     [Felix: Where one apple ends a new apple begins.]

     I didn't tell Natalie or Lizzy that I had his number and texted him. It was the first of many secrets I'd keep from them.