I cried uncontrollably that night. Not just soft sobs, but deep down, ugly cries. 
The kind of crying you only want to do in private because if anyone ever witnessed it, they would never really look at you the same. It didn't help that Jake texted me like a thousand times.

"Sky, please, I am SO SORRY!"

"Please forgive me!"

"I CANNOT live without you, please baby!"

Each word felt like heaping coal on an already blazing fire. They came in rapid succession but I never relented.

It was killing me inside, each text brought a new wave of tears. Didn't he know that he was literally torturing me? He had no right to keep pulling at my heart, it was all his fault, he made the choice.

So many times he could have come clean to his family and friends but even after all we had been through together, he just could not find the strength. There was nothing that I wanted more than to be with him but I couldn't, not like this.

I cried and cried, eventually pulling myself into the fetal position, hoping it would all just go away. I wished that somehow, I would wake up in the morning and be a perfectly normal girl with her heart firmly in tack.

I lay there, rubbing the pendant of the necklace he gave me, something that had quickly become second nature but it suddenly felt wrong to wear it. I thought it was a gesture of love but it had turned into a constant reminder of what would never be.

I took the necklace off and placed it back in its box and then walked over to my dresser.

Pulling open the top drawer, I placed it inside where it would stay permanently. When I shut the drawer felt like a door shutting on my soul, but it had to be done and I had to be strong.

Jenny called me not long after to try and console me but it was no use, how do you console a shattered heart? I finally managed to drift off to sleep, knowing that the morning would bring us face to face, something I was not ready for.

Just as I suspected, Jake was waiting by our parking spot in his truck when Jenny pulled in. I gathered myself, Jenny giving me a quick pep talk and then grabbed the handle to exit the car. Jake had walked over to the car by that time and was leaning against it with his arms folded, waiting on me.

I pushed the door to, staring only at the ground, willing myself not to make eye contact. Forcing myself to move straight ahead and out of his orbit, I felt his hand grab my upper arm, pulling me back.

"Sky, wait, please" he pleaded.

I pulled my arm out of his grasp, it took all of my will since his touch was what I constantly craved. His hand was warm and safe and comfortable, I never wanted to be free of it.

Regardless of how I felt, I had to do what was right and so I let my gaze meet his. Looking in his eyes was almost my undoing. There was so much pain there, so much longing my heart could barely stand it. 

"Jake, I have to get to school," I said firmly, with my best game face on.

My words looked as if they sliced him like a razor. Even though there was a cold distance between us that had never been present before, gravity was pulling our hearts toward each other. It was altogether confusing and unsettling. I wanted him, he wanted me but we couldn't have each other, the pain of that realization was excruciating and playing out right there in the school parking lot.

"Sky, you have to believe me I am so sorry and you know I would never hurt you, I would do anything for you," he insisted.

"Then how come you just did?"  I tried to hide my tears but I knew he saw them, mustering all of my willpower, I finally walked away. Jenny put her arm around me and lead me into school. In her own way she was trying to protect me from the pain but nothing really could.

As we entered the hall where our lockers were located, both Jenny and I stopped dead in our tracks. In large letters above the lockers we read:

JENNY WILL YOU GO TO PROM WITH ME? T

The letters took up an entire section of lockers and made a very bold statement that half of the student body was gawking at. In front of Jenny's locker stood Tag with a handful of red roses. I just stood there, taking in the scene.

Jenny ran over to Tag and threw her arms around him, yelling, "Yes, Yes, Yes."

Even though my head and heart were reeling from the exchange I just had with Jake, it brought a smile to my face. My Jenny was truly happy and I had Tag to thank for that.

As I peered out over the onlookers with their phones out, recording the special moment, I saw him. Jake was at the end of the lockers, leaning against the wall, his eyes fixed straight on me.

It wasn't lost on either of us that his friend had just done the one thing that he could not. The grand gesture that had played out over decades in a thousand different scenarios was impossible for us, and he only had himself to blame.

The bell rang, snapping me back to reality and we all headed off to class. I walked alone to give Jenny and Tag a few private moments to celebrate. School passed agonizingly slow and I was relieved when the final bell rang.

I met Jenny in the parking lot right after schood and we talked all the way home about Tag's romantic Prom invitation. Jenny was literally gushing and who could blame her?

When she dropped me off, I was glad to see dad's truck home. He didn't exactly carry on conversations with me or anything but it was still nice to know that I wouldn't have to be home alone.

I found him in the kitchen with a glass of tea and eating from a jar of peanut butter. He was staring at a stack of bills in front of him and the concern on his face could not be disguised. The atmosphere was solemn and I could feel the tension in the air.

"Dad, how bad is it?" I inquired.

He let out a long sigh and then responded, "Pretty bad Sky."

I sat down at the opposite end of the table from him, " What can I do to help?"

"Nothing, we are in so deep, there is no getting out at this point."

"What does that mean?"

He looked me dead in the eye, something he rarely ever did and replied, "We will hold on as long as we can."

And with that, he got up and left the kitchen. I was beginning to notice a definite pattern. Anytime something was awkward or uncomfortable, he would just walk away and pretend it didn't exist. Maybe he was just too weak to face anything head on.


That made sense since he would never fight back against my mother. I had never really thought of him as weak, but I was suddenly seeing him a little clearer.

He said we would hold on as long as we could but I wasn't exactly certain what that meant. What would happen when we couldn't? I wasn't sure I wanted to find out, but I headed to my room and let my mind wander through every possible scenario, none of which turned out well.

Jake continued calling and texting and I continued to ignore him. It was literally one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. He had been my rock through so many things, always there to hold me up when I was falling apart. This was one situation that not even he could help me with, I would have to see it through alone.

The following days brought more of the same, me trying not to fall apart every time I saw him and trying to find the strength to ignore his constant attempts to talk to me. We had fallen into as much of a routine as we could in this horrible new existence.

Every morning still brought us together for Jenny and Tag's sake but we didn't utter a word to one another. I even noticed he wasn't stealing glances at me, either he was willing himself not to or he was actually starting to move on.

My heart ached at the thought that he would even consider moving on after all we had been through together. It was selfish of me really, how could he not when I was refusing to continue our relationship, no matter how screwed up it was?

One morning we walked into the school and headed for our lockers like always. When we reached them, the same scene played out just as it did every morning with one minor change. In my locker, a note was left for me with only the corner sticking out.

I removed it and shoved it in my bag, no way was I going to read this in front of them. I knew who it was from and what reading his words would do to me. He watched me place it in my bag and I could see how uncomfortable he was in his own skin. It would have to be saved for when I was alone, or with Jenny.

The envelope was burning a hole in my bag all day. It consumed my thoughts, and all I wanted to do was rip it open and reveal its mystery. I didn't know why I was freaking out so badly, he texted me like a hundred times a day so whatever was in the letter was probably more of the same. Still, I couldn't shake the fear that it might be his final goodbye and that we would be over for good.

We would both have given up and I was secretly hoping he never would. When Jenny and I finally made it to her car at the end of the day, I couldn't take it any longer. 
I had to know if this relationship that had brought me so much joy, happiness, and heartache was over.

Pulling the envelope out of my bag, I stared at Jenny for reassurance. She put her hand over mine, giving me the push I needed. I knew I was in a safe place no matter what it brought me.

I opened the envelope slowly, my heart pounding a mile a minute. My eyes must have been as big as saucers because the first thing I saw was a ticket to prom. Completely confused I ripped the note out desperate to learn what was going on.

Sky,

I do not deserve you, I think we both know that. I may be too much of a coward to do this properly but I want you to go to prom. Please go, you only get one chance at Senior Prom, don't miss out because I am an idiot. I hope I see you there, it won't be the same without you.

Jake

That was not quite the romantic gesture I was hoping for but it was sweet of him to think of me. I shot him a quick text.

"Thanks for the note, it was sweet of you."

It took him all of half a second to reply.

"Does that mean your gonna go?"

"I am not sure how my presence will even make a difference, considering you don't even acknowledge it," I replied.

"Believe me when I tell you that your presence is always noticed, and not seeing you there will crush me."

"I don't know Jake, going to prom solo to watch girls hang all over you is not high on my priority list these days."

"There will be zero girls hanging on me, I promise, PLEASE GO, I am literally begging here," he pleaded.

"No promises." 

When I was done, I finally exhaled. I don't think I had stopped to breath since I saw the ticket. Being the amazing friend that she was, Jenny read the note and jumped in immediately.

"Sky, I don't generally care what that ass has to say, but he is right, it's our senior prom, you can't make me go without you," she insisted.

"Jenny, you are going with Tag, I will just be a third wheel," I reminded her.

"You, my darling are nobody's thirds wheel. Tag will just have two gorgeous girls on his arm, his head probably won't be able to fit through the door," she joked.

Then she looked at me with puppy dog eyes, "Please, please, please?"

"Okay, calm down girl, you don't have to get all crazy," I finally conceded.

I did not make this decision for him. She was I right, we only get one and he was not going to ruin it. I was going to go to that prom, look fabulous and make him regret everything. There was only one problem, I had a ticket but no dress.

******

A/N

So, do you think Sky is making the right decision by going to prom?

Please remember to vote and thanks for continuing on Sky and Jake's journey.