🥀

I don't wanna live forever, 'cause I know I'll be living in vain

And I don't wanna fit wherever

I just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home

🥀

🥀🥀🥀

He halted the car in front of the park and stepped out. Spotting Angana sitting on a bench, Raghbir walked to her and sat down on her right side. She was engrossed on her phone, going through their fan pages on Instagram.

Yeah, they too had a fandom. Angana had always been in spotlight being the prime minister's daughter. Raghbir too got popular when it got disclosed that they are dating. And their wedding pictures and clips online worked as a catalyst in making them popular to the extent where their fan pages were created on social media.

She looked at him, glared at him, to be exact. He chuckled, “What?” And she showed him a post on one of their fan pages. It was the picture of her and Aas sleeping from the day when Aas was babysitting her.

“Oh, I had shared it on my story once. They must have taken it from there.” He replied while smiling sheepishly.

She shook her head and then scrolled further. There were many pictures of Raghbir and Sahana too. Sahana was very much active on social media. Her feed was filled with selfies and reels with Raghbir. The entire country knew they were inseparable.

And then there was a particular post of Angana standing beside Abhimanyu. It was taken by the media outside the party office some months ago. The caption said, “They are the living example that a guy and a girl can be friends.”  Only if they knew that they were exes. But both of them were still good friends, no doubt in that.

“Anaa, will you keep scrolling through our fan pages? I'm tired from working all day yet I'm here to fulfill your demand.” He complained.

Apparently, Angana had demanded him to accompany her to the park near their home every single day. Because according to her, watching kids playing in the park everyday will lessen his fear of fatherhood.

“Oh, sorry.” And she put her phone down, “So how was your day?”

“It was hectic and I'm feeling very tired.”

“Aww, my baby is tired.” She pulled his cheek.

He, as always, wrapped his hand around her waist. She wasn't wearing a waistchain.

“Why aren't you wearing waistchain?” He complained.

“Who wears a waistchain to park?”

He made an upset face at that and looked away from her, watching the kids play football. Silence fell between them. A comfortable silence. He still had his hand around her waist and was rubbing his cold fingers against her warm skin.

“I think it's because of your late sister.” She spoke out of blue.

“What?” He didn't really get what she wanted to say.

“Your hesitancy to be a father. I think it's because of losing a newborn sibling at a young age. Maybe it's the trauma.”

He sighed, “It can be. She wasn't the only child my parents lost. Before my birth, they had lost two more. Two sons. One was six years older than me and the other was four years older than me. Both of them died within an hour of their birth. Luckily, I was born healthy. It gave them a hope that maybe they will not have to face the pain of losing a child again. But my younger sister too died within an hour of her birth. They were traumatized after her death so was I. I was excited to have a sibling. But one moment she was crying and the next moment she went silent... forever. Mom and Dad decided to not try conceiving a baby again. They were grateful to have at least their one child survive.”

“You never told me about it before.”  She caressed his arm.

“It's hurts talking about what my parents went through. And it hurts even more to see how it effected them. Mom became fearful of intimacy and sex, afraid of getting pregnant again. Dad, instead of consoling and supporting her, went on cheating over her.”

“It's funny. How we tend to do the very opposite of what our parents did. Because your father was a disloyal husband, you want to stay loyal in our marriage. Because my mother was a politician, I want to be a homemaker.”  She smiled softly.

“Why?”  He asked.

“You know, I am proud of her to reach the seat of prime minister. But she has compromised on her personal life to achieve it. I used to be crying, pleading her to stay with me, she couldn't stay. Dad and my late grandmother tried their best to fill the void but they couldn't.”

“I'm sorry.”  He apologized.

“Sorry for what?”  She asked, not getting why he was apologizing.

“For trying to force you into contesting CM elections.” 

“Ragh, it's not your fault. Maybe I would have gladly helped you if I was like my mother. But I'm not. She says I'm like my Chandni Nani. Sometimes I'm selfless and sometimes I'm selfish. There's no middle path. It was that one moment where I chose to be selfish.”

“Actually you did right by not helping me. Otherwise, I wouldn't have got a chance to bond with Abhimanyu.”  He smiled.

“Hmm, I'm glad you aren't jealous of him anymore.” 

“Hey, I was never jealous of him. I just kinda disliked him because he is your ex boyfriend.”  He made an excuse.

“C'mon, we were young at that time. And when Mom began grooming him, he became a lot serious and began acting like a workaholic. And that's when I realised that I don't want to be with him anymore. I wanted to be with someone who would frown when I called him Bhaiya. Someone who would casually flirt with me even after knowing I'm dating Abhimanyu. Who gifted me a blue saree on my nineteenth birthday.”  She smiled, reminiscing their initial interactions in their teenage years.

“It was your twentieth birthday.” He corrected her.

“Yeah, my twentieth birthday.”

“Anaa, I wanted date you since I was eighteen. But you were only fifteen so I didn't approach you at that time. And two years later, I got to know that you are with Abhimanyu. I was very angry. But I waited for your breakup. And then asked you out at the first chance given.”

“Ah, you were planning it for so long.”  She pinched his cheek.

“Yup, I was smitten by you.”  And he pinched her cheek.

“Flatterer.”  She got out of his hold and stood up, “Let's head to home now. I've to make preparations for tomorrow's brunch too.”

Raghbir and Angana drove back home. Raghbir freshened up and they ate dinner together. And then he helped her marinate the chicken, wash the chickpeas and vegetables and all the other stuff needed to be done twelve hours before the actual cooking. Slow cooking is tiresome but the outcome is always delicious.

When all the preparations were done, they headed to the bedroom and fell asleep almost immediately.

🥀🥀🥀

The next morning around eleven, Sahana, Shashank, Ansh and Aas reached Raghbir and Angana's house together. Ansh directly entered the kitchen. The aroma of food was irresistible. But Angana took him out while pulling his ear. It was a tough task to pull his ear because he was super tall. He was six feet and three inches in height.

All of them gathered in the living hall. The maids served them snacks and drinks. While Angana looked after the preparations of the brunch in the kitchen.

Soon Miraya too arrived and joined the group. Miraya and Shashank shared a look that didn't go unnoticed by the others.

“Is something going on between them?” Raghbir asked Sahana in a whisper.

“I'm getting that feeling from a few days. I literally heard Miraya Di flirting with Shashu Bhai.” She whispered back.

“Hmm, I'll tell Angana to keep an eye on them.” He mumbled and finished the cold drink in his glass.

“Didn't you invite Abhimanyu?”  Shashank asked Raghbir.

“I did. He must be running late.” Raghbir replied.

Sahana glared at him, “Why did you invite him?”

“Why not? He is my soon to be brother-in-law. ” He teased her.

“Jiju, don't put salt on my wounds by calling him brother-in-law.” She warned him.

“Ah, you really are acting murderous nowadays. Should I consult a counselor for you?”

“I'm here to eat tasty food. So stop eating my head or I'll break all the vases in your house.” She threatened him and it actually worked. Raghbir didn't tease her after that fearing she might actually break all the vases. Sahana was very much likely of doing that with the temper she was carrying.

“Everybody get to the dining table.”  Angana announced when the food was set on the dining table.

It took not more than two minutes to fill the chairs and everyone attacked the food. The table was filled with an array of delicious dishes. Kebab, Fried Chicken, Falafel, Butter Chicken, Biryani, Tacos and Pad Thai were sitting on the table looking all regal and ravishing.

“I'm sorry. I'm late.” Abhimanyu made his presence known and everyone stared at him with their mouths filled with food.

“Please take your seat, Abhimanyu. The food is delicious. You made it on time.” said Raghbir while devouring a piece of Kebab.

Abhimanyu looked for an empty chair. There was only one empty seat. Between Sahana and Ansh. He didn't want to sit beside Sahana but Angana's food was to die for. So he put an entire mountain over his ego and took his seat beside a sulking Sahana.

Everyone was eating in silence when suddenly Angana stood up and ran upstairs.

“Anaa, where are you going?”

“Di, what happened?”

“Angana, are you alright?”

They called for her but she didn't reply. Her sudden run left them baffled.

“I'll see what's wrong.” Saying so Raghbir stood up from his chair and went upstairs.

He entered their bedroom and saw bathroom door left open. He went inside and saw her vomiting.

“Anaa...” He mumbled her name.

She walked to the wash basin and rinsed her mouth before replying, “Ragh, I think I'm actually pregnant this time.”

•••

Thoughts 💭