29 - Invaluable
Meg faced the new week ready to take charge of her career. She arrived early hoping to find the managing editor, the big boss, available. Greg walked past her desk and stopped. "The early bird catches the worm."
"Hopefully." She looked around. Her work area was deserted. "Don't I deserve to be an editor?"
"Jeff would be lost without you on features."
"Is that my problem? I'm trying to advance my career."
"You're a gem. You provide invaluable work."
She frowned. "I don't feel valued. Sara got promoted. Sara!"
He laughed. "She's the editor of Around Town. There's a bean supper at the Congregational church in Roslindale."
Meg laughed. "It lists cultural events like museum exhibits. At least her name is in print."
"I get it. I worked hard for my first byline."
"How old were you when you got it?"
"Twenty-seven or twenty-eight. You have plenty of time."
She frowned. "I'm thirty."
He wrinkled his forehead. "No, you aren't. You look about twenty-five."
"Then I started here at seventeen."
"I trust you to tear apart my writing. That's a compliment." Greg chuckled as he walked away.
The boss wasn't in yet, so she got to work. Could it be that she was too good at her job to get promoted? The thought brought little comfort. Tyler. She wished she could talk to him about her career.
Addelyn walked up to her desk. "You look like you lost your best friend." Meg glared at her. "Right. Sorry?"
"I miss him."
Greg appeared with a Starbucks cup. "Here cheer up. You're appreciated."
Addy looked at her. "What was that about?"
"Why is everyone getting promoted except me?"
"Because you are amazing at your job."
"That makes no sense."
"Features needs you."
Even her friend didn't make her feel better, although the creamy mocha latte helped. She arrived early every morning. On Thursday, the managing editor was in his office. Tad Higgins wasn't old. Meg estimated he was in his early forties. Another career that moved up quickly. She was always nervous around him because he was perfect and beautiful, like gorgeous. His green eyes rivaled a certain blue pair, but he was no nonsense and always serious, like her father when he discussed his expectations.
His administrative assistant wasn't in, so Meg rapped on his door frame with her knuckles. He looked up. "Margaret?" His crisp voice made her feel like a child.
"Do you have a minute?"
He nodded. "Just."
She moved into his office and sat across from him. Should she have stood? Her hands were sweaty, and she debated running away. Instead, she sat tall with shoulders back, like a Rice. "What more do I need to do to get recognized for a promotion?"
He looked at her too long, causing her to want to squirm. "You belong in features. Obviously, Jeff is at the helm, but you are the most important crew member."
"I want my own helm."
"I wish I had one, but you are too valuable for listings of art exhibits. How about you sit in on our editors' meetings?"
"To share ideas."
He paused again. "I'll give you some latitude, but mostly to observe." He looked at his computer screen.
That was it, he dismissed her. Maybe one of the resumes she sent out would generate interest. After work, she changed into her running shorts. She needed to run off her frustrations. It had been a warm day, so she chose the trails by the Esplanade hoping for a breeze off the river.
She was stretching when she saw the black dog run over the BU bridge. She went into full gear in the same direction determined to catch up. He looked over at her as she finally set pace beside him. He didn't say a word, and neither did she as their feet pounded the pavement. She hadn't had a running partner since high school. It took effort to keep his pace. Occasionally, he looked over at her as if checking to see if she was ready to give up.
Meg had no intention of losing the race. She would run until he stopped. Call it pride, but she was determined.
It was the dog who called it quits first by slowing down and getting distracted by a bench. Meg could run off while Cade tried to coax him away from the enticing scents. Instead, she walked in circles catching her breath. He did the same although he was less winded.
She glanced at him. He looked different from the last time she saw him. His hair was shorter and his trimmed beard made him look less like a lumberjack. As she checked him out, their eyes met and held. She refused to look away. Her belly felt like fireworks were exploding. She would laugh if it weren't so sad. Her sparks were for a man who hated her.
Unable to stay quiet she said, "I was never engaged. I was completely single on my birthday."
He looked at her for an excruciating long pause. "You think I care."
"I don't know what to think. I thought you liked me, but clearly I was wrong."
"I met you and your boyfriend once. I already thanked you for helping me out, but I don't want to be involved in whatever sick game you and your boyfriend are playing."
"He's not my boyfriend. In fact, right now he doesn't want me as a friend." He looked at her and shook his head. His dog stopped sniffing the grass and walked over to her. He sniffed her hand before licking it. She petted him. "Too bad your owner isn't as friendly." She continued to pet him until he looked back at Cade.
"Come on, let's go home." With a tug of the leash, the dog followed his owner as he jogged across the bridge.
Meg returned home feeling worse than she felt before. After a shower, she picked up her phone and texted Tyler. Can we talk? His lack of response told her everything she needed to know.
On Saturday morning, she set out for the Esplanade again. As she stretched, she watched the bridge, willing to see crystal blue. Instead, she heard panting behind her and turned. Cade's face was expressionless as his dog greeted her. "I think he missed me."
Cade made a sound like a snort. Meg felt elated to get a reaction. The more he ignored her, her persistence grew. She needed him to respect her. Validation from others was integral to her self worth. Between her professional problems and her train wreck of a personal life, she was clinging to a thread of hope that the old Cade was hidden inside.
Trying to keep him there longer she sat on the ground and let his dog kiss her face. When he cocked his head to look at Cade who cleared his throat, she laughed. "You are adorable. What's your name?"
"Confetti."
"Because you have some white spots."
Cade shrugged. "He had the name when I adopted him."
She nodded. Someday she wanted to adopt a dog. As a child she begged, but her parents refused. "He's a great dog. You're lucky." Cade snorted. She gazed into his eyes. "I know you ran into some tough luck, um, really rotten luck, but from the moment I heard, I knew it wasn't true." He shrugged. "Seriously, even if I left after our drink in the bar, I would know. You're a good man." She sighed. "Even when you try to pretend I don't exist."
"You exist. You're winning over my dog."
"If only you were so easy."
"Why? Seriously, why do you care?"
She stood up to look him in the eye. "Because I don't deserve your scorn. Go ahead, accuse me of everything you think I've done."
He sighed. "Remember the bride?" She nodded. "You were her, but the difference was your groom was looking on."
She shook her head. "It's complicated, but Tyler and I were just friends. We pretended it was more for our parents."
"And he was okay with that?"
She shook her head. "I was the only one who didn't know?" She sighed. "He told me the next day. I was still shook up by being awoken and I didn't even know half of it."
"So you ran to him, he confessed his feelings, and you?"
"I tried, but it only hurt him because I couldn't manufacture certain feelings. Anyway, my problems were miniscule compared to yours."
"Unwanted affection, threat of prison for life. Apples and oranges."
"You have a way of making me feel like a jerk. Except when we met, you made me feel special in a roomful of gorgeous women."
His jaw dropped. She busied herself with Confetti. When he spoke, she hardly heard him. "You were." She looked up at his beautiful eyes. "Did you come to run?"
She nodded. "Yeah. Here on Sunday morning?"
"Why?"
She smiled. "It's more fun than running alone. What time?"
He shrugged. "Seven?"
She nodded. "Before the heat of the day. See you." Meg ran off before he changed his mind.
As she ran, she mused his question. Why did she care? Because the memory never faded. She wanted to find the old Cade. It was a challenge. All of the above.
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