When I was a kid I always thought that there were life out there in space and i wished to see what's out there.

But as an adult i outgrew the dream of alien life and wished to get the hell out of earth.

What's earth?

That's earth, our only home, cause we humans are fucked up, why is that?

Well America is being controlled by the woke, Europe is in a crisis of war between Ukraine and Russia and china spying all over the world.

So yeah earth is fucked but it's our home and were stuck here.

???: hello?

Lizzie: hey y/n it's Lizzie have you got the stuff for the party?

Y/n: yeah I'm just leaving the store now, just have to wait for a new cashier since the other one had a tantrum of being misgender, he was going Berserk, thankfully he was replaced.

Lizzie: wow that sucks but thanks for getting the stuff see you later.

Y/n packed the stuff in his car and drove off.

Timeskip

After arriving at her home he knocked on the door, it opens and Lizzie was there.

Lizzie: hey y/n got the stuff?

Y/n: yep so your parents left?

Lizzie: yep they won't be back till next week, this party will be awesome.

But then we saw a base appearing out of nowhere.

Y/n: whoa what the hell?

Lizzie: Shh get down and say quiet.

We were hiding near the car and saw a small robot with guards a alien and one scary robot coming out of the base.

Lizzie: holy shit Aliens they real!

???: So this is earth?

??? 2: this backwater planet doesn't look very profitable to us you better not waste the emperor's time.

??? 3: hey trust me i seen enough of these human, they pathetic!

Then a car parked near them.

Woke cashier: Oi what happened to my safespace?!

Y/n: oh shit it's that guy who got replaced after his meltdown oh boy he's dead.

Assistance: you dare shout at the emperor?!

Emperor: hold let me speak, can i help you sir?

Woke cashier: Sir? SIR?! I AM A NON-BINARY THIS IS THE THIRD TIME SOMEONE MISGENDER ME AGAIN FIRST WAS THE CUSTOMER THE SECOND WAS THE POLICE OFFICER AND NOW A ALIEN?! YOU TRANSPHOBIC ROBOT!

But then the cashier was grabbed by the neck.

Emperor: SILENCE YOU PATHETIC HUMAN MALE IT SEEMS HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU, YOUR KIND IS SO WEAK AND QUICK TO RASH OUT.

Alien: see told you They were pathetic and easy to be conquered.

Emperor: I geuss your right, minions kill him.

He chucks the cashier to the ground as the guards points their weapons at him.

Guard: any last words human male?

Cashier: fuck you you trans..

But was cut short as they killed him.

Emperor: thank goodness that i don't have to listen to that human ever again now let's discuss your payment.

Alien: oh great now I what is a mansion and some...

But was killed by the Emperor.

Emperor: no one makes demands to me, Assistance send the word to them, its time for law and order on this planet.

Assistance: yes my Emperor.

They entered the base and it warped away leaving behind a crater.

Y/n: holy shit.

Portals open and robots begin pouring out and some flying robotic centerpede

Troop: Attention humans, we have the town surrounded so surrender and the emperor will maybe grant you mercy.

Y/n: oh earth is so fucked.

But before y/n runs back inside he hears someone underneath the alien's corpse.

???: ???

Y/n: hey did you hear that?

He walks near the body.

Lizzie: what are you doing?! please be careful.

He pushed the body over and sees a wired gun he picks it up and sees the thing was talking.

???: ???

Lizzie: what is that?

Then it spits at you, you wiped it out from your face.

Y/n: Ughh pfffff gross.

Lizzie: Ugh, did that thing just spit all over you?!

Then the gun suddenly talks in perfect English.

???: Finally! Oh my god, finally! I'm free! Thank god! What a nightmare. Listen, can you pull the inhibitor chip out of me? It's the metal thing stuck in me, just pull it out.

Lizzie: Ugh, what the fuck is that?

Y/n sees the red chip and pulls it out.

???: Ahh, that feels so much better thank you! sorry about the spit I I I I needed to infected you with the translator microbes. Th-th-that's sorta how it works.

Y/n: translator microbes?

???: I geuss you guys don't have those here yet.

Y/n: hold up first who and what are you and what the hell is going on?!

Kenny: Alright, my name is kenny. I'm a Gatlian. Uhh, and that tall robot was emperor nefarious, he's about to take control over your home we got to move.

Lizzie: is that thing talking to you? Listen we have get inside now.

Kenny: No ignore her. It's very important that you listen to everything I say okay, it is your lucky day right now. We can survive this together if you just listen to me!

Y/n: okay okay just tell me what to do?

Then a base warped near the t section road.

Kenny: Those robots wants to kill us can you handle a gun? Well if you can Shoot these Fuckers!

Nefarious: attention humans surrender now or face punishment starting with this one.

Y/n: oh hell no fucker!

Kenny: Fuck yeah, there we go!

He begins shooting at it killing it.

Kenny: Alright first kill! I am so glad you picked me up Le-let's keep goin'! Inside the base is a warp device, pick it up and bring it to your home.

Y/n: okay then!

Y/n charges in the base killing troops left and right, going upstairs he found a device with a crystal above it so he pulled it out then he hears beeping.

Y/n: umm what is that beeping?

Kenny: don't worry about the beeping. The beeping is fine it's just... it's going to blow up soon.

Y/n: What oh shit!

Y/n runs out carrying the box surprisingly it was not heavy.

Y/n: Jesus okay now what?!

Kenny: just need to plug this thing into power. Do, do you have something back at your house?

Y/n: Don't know but...

The phone starts ringing.

Y/n: Lizzie what's wrong?!

Lizzie: they banging on the door help me!

Y/n: Shit hang on I'm coming!

He runs to Lizzie's home blasting troops left and right again.

Lizzie: (Screaming) get away from me!

Troop: surrender now.

Y/n: shit Lizzie!

Y/n barges in and sees Lizzie with a baseball bat and a fucked up troop.

Y/n: Lizzie oh thank god you're alright.

Y/n hugs Lizzie.

Lizzie: oh thank God your alive.

Kenny then spits at her

Lizzie: (gags) he spat at me and itgot in my mouth it's disgusting.

Kenny: hey sorry break up your tearful reunion but do you got anything here that emits. I don't know, microwaves? I know it's a lot to ask.

Lizzie: what, like a fuckin' microwave? Oh, whoa, I can understand your gun now.

Kenny: Translator microbes! They're contagious but cou- please just move past all this shit!

Y/n puts the device on the bench and it's wires attached to the microwave.

Kenny: Oh, thank god, it worked! Okay i-i-it's just gonna need a second to boot up...

Lizzie: holy shit they not only here!

She changes to every news channel around the world and saw the some robots invading different countries.

Y/n: Bloody hell just how many there are?

Kenny: to many.

Then the tv got hijacked and the emperor was on tv.

Emperor nefarious: attention earthlings, I am emperor nefarious and this is  an announcement you and your planet is now under my rule as emperor, but don't fret this not yhe time for fear but the time for celebration, for to long you squander about identity politics and wage civil war and your kind have lost IQ with this stupid "Woke" ideology, so we have taken control of this planet and making sure that these humans will behave good... Permanently.

Y/n: well shit

Lizzie: Fuck

Kenny: Alright, it's go time! Let's get outta here!

Lizzie: wait. "Get out of here?" ...Where are we going?

The house starts shaking and outside turns puple.

Kenny: To find somebody who can help! You ever been to zurkies? Because you're about to, except that it's a space restaurant, out there you're gonna be outta your element! And better just follow my lead!

Then the shaking stops.

Y/n: is it over?

Lizzie: What... what just happened?

Kenny: looks like we made it. Welcome to Zurkies!

Lizzie: Did you just... warp my entire home... to another planet?

Kenny: Yeah, keep! We'll safe here. Now take me outside!

Y/n: wait is it safe to breath out there?

Kenn: Yep zurkon made sure.

Lizzie: Whoa, whoa, you're gonna leave me here in, inwhat, space? Are w- are we in space?

Kenny: Yeah, sorry. I know you're bit shaken up, but you'll be fine. It's better than getting enslaved by emperor nefarious. Trust me.

Lizzie: I geuss that's true.

Y/n: no arguments from me.

Lizzie: But How the hell are we gonna get back to Earth?

Kenny: Uhh, we can't. That was a one-way trip. We don't have the coordination to your planet.

Y/n: then we can't get back to our home.

Lizzie: Then what about my parents? Y/n's parents? And everyone else?

Kenny: Look, we left because we're trying to save them! Th-th-that's why we need to gind rivet. So so can we please go find her?

Y/n walks to the door.

Lizzie: You're going OUT there?! Into SPACE?!

Y/n: well why not, it one small step for and one giant jump to save mankind.

He opens the door and sees himself in space.

(,imagine the house is on platform 3)

Kenny: Yeah! Welcome to fuckin' space!

Y/n: whoa!

Kenny: And this is zurkies N-not bad huh? I don't know if rivets here though.
Let's just... head inside zurkon can help I'm a customer here after all.

Y/n: let's hope your right.

So with that y/n walks towards zurkies as he enters the hallway a ship lands and a figure jumps out of the ship and stretching her body it was rivet.

Rivet: (Groans) finally out of the ship, now i need a drink... what the?

She sees the house.

Rivet: what even is that? Hmm maybe zurkon knows.

She also heads to zurkies, unknowingly that rivet and y/n's fate will be tangled together.

TBC