Vodka in public was not the best idea, but Darcy needed to unwind a little. Well, a lot. It wasn't every day that a girl finds herself tangled up in the sheets with a formerly evil god from another realm. And even if some other girl did manage to find herself in that situation, Darcy was pretty sure she was the only one who could lay claim to popping a god's cherry. Hah! She had a place in the history books for sure. That was assuming she could ever tell anyone about it. Which she wouldn't. Loki still had the power to turn her inside out and wring her dry if he wanted to, and she was pretty sure he didn't want it to be known that he'd spent centuries as a virgin.

Thankfully, enough vodka kept those thoughts from happening. She had to be careful though. Too much vodka could unravel the leash on her tongue, and Darcy didn't want to find out what it was like to be turned inside out. It would probably hurt. A lot.

Jane looked like she wanted to share some juicy gossip, but Darcy had put the brakes on. "Not a word until I've had at least one glass of vodka," she warned.

Jane grinned at her. "Wow. I didn't think you'd be this tense after your little adventure the other day. Didn't your lucky guy do for you?"

Darcy glared at her over the vodka. "I said not a word. That was a lot of words." She tossed back the whole glass, and waited patiently, while Jane stared at her with a smile. Finally, her edges began to blur a little, and she was feeling good. "Now....you can speak."

Jane laughed at her. "You are too funny. Seriously, did you not get any satisfaction out of your lucky guy?"

Even thinking about it made Darcy's whole body jiggle like jello. "I can't even describe it. OMG. But it's complicated." She grinned. "What about you? You look like you're bursting to share something."

Jane laughed a little. "It's the most amazing thing. Loki is dating a human. He's stopped by a couple of times in the last few days to get Thor's advice on mortal dating customers."

That called for another glass of vodka, after she pried her jaw off the table. Darcy shut her mouth, poured her vodka, and put on her best poker face. "Wow. That's SO far from what I was thinking you wanted to gossip about." She took a big gulp of her second glass.

Jane rolled her eyes. "Oh c'mon Darcy. I've gossiped about Thor before. I've probably told you things you didn't want to know."

That was the truth. When you're not getting any, the last thing you want to do is listen to your friend brag about her boyfriend's godly prowess in bed. That type of thing makes a girl's happy place very sad, which can lead to other bad things. Or just a lot of quality alone time with herself. But hey! She didn't have that problem anymore.

"You're right," she said aloud, when she realized that Jane was waiting for some type of response. "It's hard to look a guy in the eye when the girl he's banging has totally shared his performance. It's all you can think about. It actually made me not want to talk to him. What if, in the middle of chilling with you guys, I accidentally popped out some detail about how he wiggles his hips and drives it to the right a little bit to hit your magic spot?"

"DARCY!" Jane yelped. "I did not tell you anything like that!" She looked absolutely mortified, with cheeks so red Darcy was expecting actual flame.

"Well no, but I had to fill in the blanks. You left a lot of those, and I'm an information kinda gal. I gotta know these things." She was dimly aware that she may have had too much vodka too fast, but this was funny as hell, and she needed to unwind, especially after hearing Jane's Loki gossip. "Since you left it vague, I'm making up my own shit. Maybe I'll run it by Thor and see how close I hit it."

"Don't you dare!" Jane's whole head was red now. It looked kinda cool. Maybe this was how Nick Fury had looked the other day, when Loki had almost 'popped him like a puss filled pimple'. The thought that Jane might pop and spray her with nasty goop had Darcy reconsidering saying more, but the vodka had the bit in its teeth and was running wild.

"I bet he's a missionary guy, right? Likes to stare down at you, quivering beneath the thrust of his godly loins?" Well that flashed vivid memories into her brain.

Jane sounded like she was gargling something. Darcy dimly wondered if she'd swallowed her tongue.

"Of course, Thor's got a lazy streak. I could totally see him laying on his back while you do the wild cowgirl routine. He'd act all godly then too. With a little smirk. And when you're done, he'd smash a glass and yell 'another!' You'd be at it all night. Cuz gods have staying power." Oops. That was straying a little too close to where she didn't want to go. Think of being wrung out. Reconnect tongue to brain. Move past vodka haze. Breathe calmly. Stop thinking of Thor and Jane (or Loki and Darcy) having sex. Stop it. Not one more evil little thought.

"BANANA SPLIT!" she blurted, then snapped her mouth shut.

The other patrons of the little dive bar they were sitting in glared at her. They should be used to it by now. Darcy came here a lot.

She focused every last vodka sopped brain cell on stopping her tongue from forming another word. Then she saw the threek. It was a lifesaver. She snatched it up from beside her vodka bottle, and waved it at Jane. "Look Foster! It's a threek! Most places don't have threeks. I wonder why they don't make more of them? What's the benefit of a fork versus a threek? To conserve metal, shouldn't we all switch to threeks? Oh that's brilliant! We gotta get that out to the planet huggers and the silverware manufacturers right away. Save the planet! Only use threeks!"

She was vaguely offended when their waitress hustled over and removed the bottle of vodka. "Hey – what? That's ours! We paid for the whole thing. Well, not yet. But we will later. You can't take it away. I need it. Life is complicated and I don't want to look at it without vodka right now."

Jane wasn't any help. She was holding a glass of ice water to her flaming cheeks. Darcy glared up at their waitress. "You are so not getting a tip if you take that away."

"I'll bring it back after you've had some food," the woman assured. "Can you put the fork down? You're scaring people."

"It's not a fork. It's a threek!" Duh. Apparently, the woman couldn't count. Darcy filed a mental note to check their bill to make sure they weren't charged for the wrong amount of items. But the note floated away on a stream of vodka. Ah....that was serene. She was floating around her own brain, in a stream of vodka. Nice. She sat the threek down and admired it.

"Water," she blurted suddenly. She totally needed water to dilute the vodka. She knew better than to drink vodka on an empty stomach.

Oh wait! There was water right in front of her. How cool was that? She drank the whole glass, ignoring the stuff she didn't quite get in her mouth. It dripped down onto her chest, making a big wet spot. That was cool too. It looked like someone had their mouth-

Bad thought! Stop! How was Jane doing? She put down her empty water glass and peeked at her friend. Jane was looking back at her. Her cheeks were mostly normal again.

"Hey girl." Darcy wiggled her fingers. "Can you speak now?"

Jane bit her lip. "I can. What about you?"

"I am totally cool. I've got a little too much vodka sloshing around an empty stomach, but other than that, I am good." She barked out a laugh. "I'm so good I make men beg!" Bad thought. "Talk to me, Foster. If you talk, I won't, and right now that would be a great thing."

"Ooookay. Well...I'm actually feeling a little sorry for Loki."

"Huh? Why would you feel sorry for Loki?" Darcy really, really wanted to hear more, but tried to play it cool.

"He's all unsettled by things right now. I get the impression that he didn't fit in on Asgard at all, and that no one really paid much attention to him. He's trying to learn how to handle emotions like a normal person, but I think it's very difficult for him. He looks conflicted and confused, and that's why he keeps visiting, because Thor is his constant." Jane smiled thoughtfully. "He's intriguing."

Hands off, bitch. "Whoa Jane. Sounds like you're developing a Loki crush."

Foster laughed. "Darcy you are so drunk. I'm just saying that he may not be the raging psychotic animal that I thought he was originally. I feel bad for him right now. He won't tell Thor who he's dating, but apparently, she did a number on him. They're not used to women who are aggressive." She snickered a little. "He actually looked like he'd been hit by Mjolnir in the back of the head. And he blushed!"

Darcy was about to embarrass herself in a big way. "Loki blushed?" She felt misty eyed thinking that her actions had had that much of an affect on Loki. He always seemed so controlled. But then again, he had begged. Pleaded with her to eat her banana split. He hadn't been very controlled right then. "So he's getting some mortal action and he likes it?" Tell me more, Foster. Talk!

"It's overwhelmed him. Thor thinks he likes the girl, and he really doesn't know how to deal with that fact." Jane took a sip of her water. "It will be interesting to see how this plays out." She laughed out loud. "He's keeping the Avengers on their toes right now. Poor Stark. Apparently, everything he put on the other day kept turning hot pink and had the words 'Loki's Bitch' on it. Including the Iron Man suit. Fury was not amused, but Thor couldn't stop laughing about it. He said it's typical Loki mischief."

She wanted to hear more. Why the fascination? Well, okay, Loki was a god, and fantastic in bed, even though he was still learning, and he was dangerous and tortured and all the things that girls should stay away from. Right.

"Where does he go?" she heard herself asking.

"What?"

"Where does he go when he's not punking the Avengers or visiting you and Thor? Does he have an apartment in NYC or something? Does he blip in and out of Asgard? Does he steal food, or does he have money?" Stop talking, Lewis. "I mean, I'm drunk and I'm thinking weird things, and I am an information gal. Now I'm curious."

Jane frowned. "I...I don't know. I'll have to ask Thor. Maybe he knows." She shook her head. "Enough about the godly brothers! What about this lucky guy of yours? Casual, or is there something there?"

Darcy propped her chin on her hand. "I don't know. But he keeps coming back for more, so I guess that's a good thing, huh?" She shrugged. "Like I said, it's complicated."

"Who is he?" Jane was very curious, leaning forward with wide eyes.

"Just a guy. I don't want to talk about it, or I'll jinx myself. Once I'm sure where it's going, then maybe I'll share some identity details. Wouldn't want the guy to get a reputation, you know?" She snorted laughter. "I think he has a freaky side in bed, but I haven't cracked it yet." She cracked her knuckles with a slightly tipsy grin. "I will though. I'll coax the freak out to play with me."

Jane blushed. "You're wicked, Darcy. I almost feel sorry for this guy."

"Oh you do. You do!" Shut the hell up, Lewis! Why don't you just announce to the world that you're banging Loki and you popped his cherry? It'll be way too cool for the five minutes that he lets you live.

A banana split plopped itself down on the table between them. Darcy titled her head up to frown at their waitress. What the hell? Was the woman trying to encourage her bad thoughts?

"Why?" she asked.

The girl smiled gently. "You ordered it. Loudly. So here it is."

Shit. She had yelled banana split, but only because her evil mind went right there when trying to stop thinking about god sex. She needed to send it back, but she was hungry, and it was a banana split, and oh those memories were very potent.

Jane scooped up a spoon. "Well, let's dig in. You're sharing, right?"

Ha! "Only this one. You can't have the other one."

Foster's nose wrinkled. "I have Thor. I'll make my own."

They dug right in and polished it off quickly. Then it was time to walk next door, to a dance club, to work off the vodka and any frustrations. Darcy managed to lose herself to the moment, and it wasn't until she got home that she thought about her date with Loki the next night. She was going to fret about it until he arrived. What to wear? What to expect? Did she like him?

But finally, it was time to sleep. Tomorrow was another day, and it would work out the way it did.

♾️ ♾️ ♾️

I guess, a little girl's night was necessary.

I don't even like Jane, I don't know why I'm writing about her. But for now, on this timeline, I really wanna write about Thor so I'd just tolerate Jane for a while like I did for two freaking Thor movies.

Vote and Comment, lovelies! Weeeh!

Love,
InfinityHaze ♾️