Violetta's POV

I never realized how big Micheal was, I mean this guy is massive. It surprises me I'm not afraid of Mike because he's slightly taller than Micheal and has the same build. "May I come in?" He asked, tilting his head to the right. "Sure".

Micheal called to ask if we could have lunch together to discuss my café. I agreed because I want as much help as I can get. Micheal walked into my apartment and examined it while I closed the door. "I'll go get my coat so we can head out", I told him then walked away to my room. My phone buzzed in my palazzo pocket, sending vibrations to my thigh. I picked it out to see a text from Mike. Ugh, it's Saturday. Let me rest for fucks sake.

On the lock screen, it read "Fries, is Micheal with you?". Mike recently started calling me fries—he said it's cause I eat it so much. I opened up my phone to reply to his sudden question but then he called me.

"Did you just leave me on delivered?", he asked, his voice thick over the phone. "Uhh no, I just saw it.", I assured. "Yeah right. Is Micheal with you?", he questioned. "Yeah. He's with me, do you need him for something?"

"That dickhead", he whispered. "I've told you he's obsessive, so I need you to tell him to leave now," Mike ordered. It seems he's forgotten I have a life other than being his assistant.

"I can't tell him to leave because number one, it's rude, and number two, I need him.", I explained. "What the fuck do you need him for. Your cafe?", Mike interrogated. "Yes actually. He wants to assist me."

"Violetta! I'm investing already, so tell him to leave.", he shouted over the phone. I will never get why he's so arrogant. "He wants to buy shares. Like shares. Actual shares", I informed. "I'll buy shares, so tell him to leave," he argued.

"I'm speaking as your friend when I say you need help. Bye, Mike, I have someone to attend to."

I finished my sentence and hung up the phone before he could say another word. I'm sure Micheal is not obsessive, I mean he seems like a kind guy. "Violetta, are you coming or?" he yelled softly through the door. I didn't reply, instead, I quickly picked up my coat on my bed and ran out of my room.

"Sorry, someone called", I told him apologetically. "It's ok" he looked up at me and smiled. Yep, I'm sure he isn't harmful. Nicholas came out of his room with sleepy eyes and walked over to me. "Hi buddy, did you enjoy your nap?" I asked earning a small mumble of assurance from him. "I didn't think you would be awake by now. Paul offered to babysit you"

"Who's Paul?" Micheal cut in curiously. "He's a long-time friend", I looked at him as I answered then back to Nickolas. "Huh, I see this is your son", he commented. "He looks like you", he finished, making me chuckle lightly.

"Mummy I'm gonna be like him when I grow up", Nickolas said, looking up at Micheal with admiration. "Of course, you'll be taller", Micheal joked. "Yes", Nickolas laughed, already alert. "Nickolas, I'll give you a snack ok? Then you need to wait for Paul to come. He should be here soon so you can tell him what you want for lunch", I decreed.

I made sure to lock the kitchen door and remove any possibly harmful item from their reach a while ago, just for safety. "Let's go then", I peeked at Micheal and walked off to the door, then opened it. I shut the door behind me, making sure to cross-check that it was fully closed.

Satisfied, Micheal and I proceeded to the exit of the building and then to his car. "So, where would you like to go", he asked. "Anywhere is fine. But it shouldn't be too rowdy, since we want to talk formally.", I explained, but he didn't seem too happy about my words.

The ride was smooth and quiet before we then arrived at Rivers Brunch, an upcoming restaurant. Micheal got out of the car and opened my door for me like the gentleman he was. We finally got a seat inside the restaurant and then ordered our meals. I probably shouldn't get burgers again. I've been eating it at least once a day and I don't want to get kwashirkor.

"So, I'm aware that you already have the spot for the cafe. The environment is good and in a popular area, so people will know about it quickly", Micheal said. "Yes, I did that on purpose. Mike is investing already, so money isn't my issue. I would like to talk about advertising.", I began. "I know the location is on a busy street, but I would still like to go beyond just the people on the street."

"I understand. I actually own a filming industry. We work more on adverts and stuff like that... Have you seen that hotel advert with the furniture jingle", he asked. "Oh yes, I have. It's on the tv like 24/7." I clarified. "Well, it was filmed in my organization and the hotel is booming now."

"Wow, that's great. But I also heard how much it takes to pay for an advert like that." I bit my lip slightly at the thought of having to pay a whopping seventy grand just for a short video, less than one minute. Our food came before we could continue our conversation. The cute waiter placed both our meals in front of us and—oh my gosh—the smell of my chicken and vegetables was just remarkable.

"For you", the man said as he handed me a tissue paper. I opened it to see it contained his number... Wow! "What's got you baffled?" Micheal implored. "He wrote his number.", I told him chuckling at the boy's game. "Mhh, I see", Mike said with an annoyed expression. This guy doesn't seem obsessed—he just seems to have low tolerance and anger issues.

"I believe the café will do well, so I'll do the advert for free", Micheal said as he took a big bite out of his baked potato. "That... Great, but I don't want to owe you anything. That's a lot of money you're letting go", I explained, trying to reject his offer politely.

"Darling, that's a cent. Or at most a dollar to me.", he started. "Let me help you. It's for free—from me to you." Why couldn't I be born as one of these guys who think seventy grand is a cent? I'm jealous.

"Oh... Well, thank you very much. I appreciate it", I appreciated. "Anything for you", he said, chuckling. Damn... He's sexy.

"Now that we're done with that. Did you ever think about my offer?", he took another bite from his meal. "Which offer?", I entreated, sincerely confused. "Marriage".

"You're still on that huh... The thing is, I'm just getting my life on track and I don't think that's the right decision to make right now. I have my life ahead of me and all, soon I'm going to save enough to go to college.", I clarified. "I'm still nineteen after all, and I'm not really... Interested overall".

"Mhh. You can do all that even if you're married, but ok", he started, gritting his teeth. The airroom suddenly became tense and awkward because of the weird conversation. I only met him like what, two months ago and he wants to marry me. That's Questionable.

We finished our meals and Micheal took me home. "Thanks for everything. I'll contact you so we can talk more about the advertisement.", I hugged him lightly and walked off to my apartment. What a hectic day.

Opening my apartment door, I was met with Naomi and Nora sleeping in each of her arms on a mat laid out on the floor. I walked further in to find Nickolas watching some action cartoon with Paul. "Hi guys, I see you kept yourself occupied"

"Hey V", Paul got up from the vouch and walked over to me—then hugged me tightly. "Thanks for watching them. I call you too often for this.", I apologized. "It's ok, I love doing it. They're like my children". That sentence hit me hard, they're like my children.

"Uhh, are you ok? You zoned out for a second" Paul waved his hands in front of me. "Yeah sorry about that. Are you leaving now or"

"Do you want me to stay?" He asked. "I don't mind, I guess", I began. "I just need to put them to bed. You can go ahead and freshen up."

Paul helped me pick up Naomi and Nora gently, then laid them each on their beds, while I convinced Nickolas to go to sleep. He's so stubborn at times. Thirty minutes later, we had done everything needed—put the children to bed, had our baths, and brushed our teeth.

"How did the meeting go?" Paul asked as he got into my bed. "It went well, soon, you'll see my café on your tv screen", I bragged. "That's great"

I got into bed with Paul, ready to sleep when he suddenly pulled me closer to him. "Pau–", before I could say a word, he pressed his lips against mine, holding me close. He lightly pressed his tongue against my lip, urging entrance to my mouth which I automatically gave.

His hands traced down to my hip, letting a small moan come out from my mouth. He moved down from my mouth to my neck, sucking on it with vigor while his hands still examined my body.

I don't know why but it just felt... Wrong.

I couldn't help but moan a few times because of how good what he was doing felt but I knew I didn't want this. I started seeing Paul as more of a friend or brother about a year back. He's done so much for me and the last thing I want to do is hurt his feelings, but if I've learned anything over the years, it's to not keep quiet when you don't want something.

Paul got on top of me then took off his grey shirt and shit... He's hot. Everything from his broad shoulders to his biceps was making me reconsider the whole just a brother mindset. Pressing his lips against my collarbone, he raised my shimin and caressed my skin, letting goosebumps trail all over.

"Paul, we need to", I began once again, but he cut me off from my words when his hands went through my underwear more. Suddenly, I felt pressured, and all the memories came running back.

"Paul!" I screamed, already scared. "I- I'm sorry but I think you should leave", I scrambled off the bed and took deep breaths to calm myself down. "V, I've been trying ok, and it's obvious you're not"

"Paul... You need to leave", I begged with a shaky voice, trying to hold back the tears that were pleading to be released. "Why won't you just give me... Us a chance huh." he began to speak. "Paul, please jus-"

"No, no. I need to let you know how I feel... I've been trying for years to prove to you how much I care. I've treated your children like mine and I've been with you, no questions asked."

"I didn't ask you to do that Paul", I sobbed. "But I did!" Paul screamed with anger visible in his voice. "I did" he repeated.

"Paul, please just leave", I begged, already shaking. "I get it ok, you were raped. But it doesn't mean you should push everyone who cares about you away," he yelled. Tears fell from my eyes, and I didn't hear anything Paul was saying anymore. My head was aching and my eyes were foggy from the tears. And then it hit me.

I never told Paul that I was raped...

It all began to make sense.

Why would some rich kid with his whole life ahead of him, decide to help out a poor girl who got pregnant? There was no possible reason. Paul sacrificed a lot just for me, and I can see why now.

"Violetta. Look at me, I need you to breathe", Paul spoke, shaking me. His efforts went to waste because I couldn't think straight with all the thoughts and recolections; how he took me in his home, how he would hold me when I got scared at night, how he cared for me like I was his... It was all a lie.

"Y-you we're the one", I stammered. "Those eyes. I could never forget those eyes. You were the one in the alley",

"V, look at me", he spoke. "Get out! Get out and don't come back... I-i never want to see you again", I shouted as loud as my voice could go. "Leave!"

"You don't understand... I would never -" he began but I cut him off. "How did you know I was raped then... I never told you how I got pregnant", I said my words slowly, and of course, Paul didn't speak. How could he after he was exposed?

"Leave. Just leave! I never want to see you near me or my children", I continuously hit him till he got to my room door. "Get the fuck out of my house!" I yelled, my voice cracking up. I opened the door to my room with shaky hands and pushed Paul out, trying to take out my anger on him by hitting and banging on his chest.

"Violetta, you aren't even", he tried to speak. "Why can't you listen. Go away you damn asshole!". More tears flew like a river and it was getting harder to breathe.

"Mommy", I heard a small voice speak from my back. "Mommy, what's wrong"

I turned around to find Nickolas standing behind me with his lips pouted as he watched me run mad. "Darling, why don't you go back to bed ok", I cooed. "Why are you crying?" he questioned, looking at me with supervising stares. "Nickolas, lets" Paul whispered as he picked up Nickolas' right hand.

"Let go of him" I snatched my son's hand out of Paul, staring at him with disgust. "Leave my fucking house, Paul. I won't say it again", I said, sniffling and wiping the tears off of my face. Paul looked at me shocked but I didn't care. The audacity for him to stand there acting innocent and kind.

"You didn't hear me out", he tried to touch me but I smacked his hand away. I finally saw the defeat in his eyes—those same light eyes that examined my naked body and ignored my tears. Paul left the apartment not long after, leaving me to Nickolas.

"Are you angry with Popsy?", he implored, whimpering lightly. "No, no dear. It's a long story but everything is ok."

"How about you go to bed and we'll get cookie dough ice cream tomorrow. Your favorite", I offered, picking him up and walking over to his room. I got in and laid him on his bed, then kissed him on his forehead. I hence whispered into his ear "I love you" and then exited the room.

Once I got into my room, away from the eyes of anyone, I broke down. Warm tears dropped from my eyes onto my black shimmer as I replayed Paul's touch on my body, comparing it to the touch when I was raped.

All the suicidal thoughts came back worse and I couldn't stop feeling the tingles on my skin at every spot he laid his hands on. Air refused to leave my throat, suffocating me as my tears fell even more. I felt useless. My body had been slain and taken away from me.

I got up sluggishly and staggered to my bathroom. Opening the drawer, I picked up the small sharp knife in my wardrobe and walked over to the mirror. I felt hot like I was burning— I took off my clothes and eyed my reflection. The more I looked at myself the louder the voice in my head that told me I was ugly got. I held the knife up to my throat, imagining what the world would be like without me... How happy everyone would be.

But I couldn't do it.

No matter how happy others would be if I died, I knew deep down the pain my family would feel, and that was enough to stop me.

I gave up and dropped to the floor and hurdled myself into a ball, whimpering as I was too weak to cry. Everything was blurry. And dark.

I let my eyes shut, hoping I died on my own.

.

.

.

It's a different kind of pain when you have no hope... When you trust just one person, and put faith in them and then, they let you down.

Just like everyone else.

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Hello everyone. It's Ruby. I hope you're all liking the book. I wrote this chapter with all my heart. There are so many mental illnesses out there that people suffer from. I hope everyone reading this book is all right.

Please seek help if you ever have suicidal thoughts of any kind. It is terrible, speaking from experience. Take care.❤️