Im sad, I had a pretty awesome day (rehearsal and then tv and candy for the rest of the day) so why am I so sad and unhappy and mad at myself and disgusted and all of a sudden feel worthless when I haven't done anything, maybe that's why, but I feel the same way even when I do stuff. And I'm flipping tired of it of being so alone and I know so many people feel this way and I hate that cause none of us have done anything to deserve this and it just happens. I hate being empty even when I'm filled to the brim with emotions. And I hate seeing my friends who I love more than almost anything going through the same thing and not being able to do a single thing about it cause I'm fucking useless. My sister turned off my light and I almost fell trying to get the lights on. I have problems but they aren't as bad as other people so when I went to talk to a therapist who I wanted to talk to I felt like I was wasting her time by being there, and most days I feel like I'm wasting everyone's time by just being alive. And I ignore my own problems to help other people cause that's the only thing I'm good at and I'm not even that good at it. I'm surrounded by people who are amazing at all the things I thought I was good at but after seeing them I realize I'm not and there isn't anything I can do that makes me worth being me and I'm sorry I'm being so fucking depressing but I'm tired of keeping all this in and I need to tell someone and the only person I would feel comfortable talking to in my life is in another state and I'm not even allowed to talk with her. So I'm telling random people on the internet cause it won't have an affect on me and I still can get it off my chest. So if you are reading this, how was your day?