Hey Tyler,

Fourth grade was when I started suffering from the consequence of being your friend.

Okay that sounded so dramatic!

What I wanted to say was that fourth grade was when I was pushed of the swing by James.

You remember James, don't you? He was your buddy after all. He was also the one who hated my guts. Why?

"Because Emily you're nothing but a crying baby and in case you were too blind to see that let me then enlighten you, Tyler is only acting to be your friend because he pity you and he's starting to get annoyed by you following him everywhere. Why don't you make us all a favor and go and find someone who would actually want to be your friend and leave him alone?"

Those was the exact words that James said when I feel on my face kissing the ground.

I tried not to cry, I tried not to give him the satisfaction of seeing my tears.

Then I had a look around me, all the kids were staring, most of them were laughing, and none of them took a step forward.

I looked down feeling humiliated,
Humiliated because I cried
Humiliated because I didn't say a word
And humiliated because I slightly believed him

"What happened?!"

I looked up instantly when I heard your voice,
You were kneeling in front of me trying to remove the the dirt from my face.

I looked around but nobody dared to say a word. I didn't blame them, why would I do that when I did the exact same thing?

"I fell"

I lied. I saw you looking intensely at me waiting for a reply. I saw the pained expression on your face when you realized that I lied.

I lied knowing well that you'd know that, but it didn't stop me.

But really put yourself in my shoes, what did you expect me to say?

"Hey, your best friend pushed me and humiliated me in front of everyone?"

Thinking about it now, I should have said that.
Can't say the little me was good at making decisions.

I was a scared crying weak girl.
I never fought for myself,
I never fought for you...