"Don't." The burly frowning guy says coolly. His chapped hands are curled into very capable-looking fists. And he's also like at least five inches taller than Alfred--probably more!--but does that stop him? No, of course not! "Don't," the guy repeats, as if that's the only english word he knows. "Don't."

"Relax, buddy," Alfred says lightly. "I jus' wanna touch your pretty scarf--"

Somehow, the punch comes as a surprise to him.