In the precedent chapter :

After being kidnapped by the hunters at the age of fifteen, I had succeeded in escaping them a year later, but I could only count on myself.

Never trust anyone and be independent at all costs. Do not rely on anyone when there are problems. Never ask for help.

Help, comfort, love... Could I let Alpha give me all this? Could I let him take care of my deepest wounds? Will he succeed in curing me? I was hoping for it. Yes, in the depths of my heart, I eagerly desired it.

Fear.

I wanted to express my emotions again and fully open my heart to show it to Adam, but I was too frightened that once he discovered what was inside me, he would reject me. That would certainly destroy me. The human being that I was would have a broken heart, and my wolf would also be annihilated.

***

We walked in the direction of Adam's house. His hand, still in my back, pushed me forward. And I didn't reject it. For now.

The road wasn't paved as in a town. When I listened clearly, there were no engine noises or even other gear. Apparently, everybody walked here and there were some who had turned into their wolf's form. To be honest, it was pretty nice. My gaze dazzled the dwellings.

Colored. The houses, spaced out of verdure, were mere commonplace houses but, they were nicely decorated with flowers and climbing plants. It seemed like the forest was one with the structures.

The only building with several floors was a structure further away which gave off a feeling of dominance. It was a big and proud tower. Plants and flowers followed him along the façade embellishing the monument. My eyes wandered around like a child discovering a new city. And that was the case. Of course, I tried not to show my amazement.

As we advanced, people turned to us and shouted "Alpha" with an enlightened face, but curious as soon as they saw me. Head raised, shoulders relaxed, back straight, I tried to show my embarrassment to the minimum.

"Wait for me," Adam whispered into my ear, before going to greet a woman of a mature age, who might even be his mother. She looked smaller than me. Graceful like a dancer, she embraced Adam with a big smile on her face. Maybe she had been dancing before? My mother was a ballerina in her youth. I remembered those old photo albums where she smiled and danced headlong for this passion. She was sublime. She always was and will be forever amazing.

A leather balloon stopped at my feet. I looked up to see some children playing together on a clear field nearby. I took the ball and ran towards the players.

"I can play with you, I'm bored," I pleaded in a small voice. They looked at each other and then grinned.

"Okay! We were missing a player anyway," a brown-haired boy exclaimed.

Running, shooting, making passes. Play, have fun and especially hear the bursts of laughter of the children, for my greatest pleasure. I loved them. These little ones were my source of light in the darkness of my past. The sun was already setting, while the children were called by their parents to go home.

Full of earth, but joyous as I hadn't been for some time, I walked towards Adam and his men with a low face. Their amused looks embarrassed me.

"Sorry," I murmured.

Adam burst out laughing while my heart missed a beat. Ignoring this sensation, I continued my walking. Surrounded by adults, I replaced my mask of indifference which hid my emotions.

Adam's house wasn't different from the other houses, except perhaps by its size, which seemed to be greater at a first glance. Adam came in first, then gave me the passage while keeping my eyes on me.

Stressed and worried about being alone with him, I could feel guards posted outside the house. Not having a head for anything else, I concentrated, in case Adam would attack me by surprise or that something worse would happen. My emerald gaze fixed in the Alpha's back, I couldn't appreciate the inside of his house. I could always do it later when I was alone. We climbed the stairs and then opened a door leading to a room.

I wanted to go into the bathroom to remove all the earthy sand that had lodged in my hair, but I remembered that I didn't have any clothes. The only ones I owned was a dark brown tank top, a black waistcoat and denim shorts, handy to remove if I wanted to transform myself. Adam was back to me, I opened my mouth, but he went ahead.

"You can take one of my t-shirts as pajamas if you want." He rummaged through his wardrobe and handed me a tall, gray-colored t-shirt.

Nodding my head, I quickly grabbed the garment and then went in the shower hoping to put more distance between our two bodies.

***

The mist fogged the mirror, which I wiped with the back of my hand. I left the bathroom, then sat cross-legged on the large bed that stood in the middle of the room. The t-shirt was like a tunic that was falling to me mid-thigh. Having spent nearly two years in the forest, nudity didn't bother me more than that and was a commonplace detail for werewolves.

Adam wasn't in the room. My back on the headboard of the bed, I could observe the room at leisure.

Shades of blue and silver contrasted the walls of the room. Even the different pieces of furniture had this touch of modernity. The door of the thick and heavy room was on my left. I let my gaze drift toward the desk in front of me. A lot of papers hung around this workspace and a laptop was there. Maybe I could use it too.

In the right corner, there was a sliding door that was in wood covered with a gray paint. He had to really love this metallic color... A few timid rays of sunlight crossed the window which gave a soft effect to the dark-colored room.

My contemplation of the room came to an end when I heard the door of the room open to a man more than seductive. Small pearls of water escaped from his ebony black hair. But a white towel placed on his shoulders prevented them from continuing their paths lower. He wore a white shirt that stuck to his skin and a simple black pants. It seems he was going to leave. After a few minutes of silence in which I stared at everything but himself, he finally deigned to speak. But not about nice things.

"I talked to your old Alpha. He told me they found you near the dead hunters who had kidnapped several werewolves. You were dying, but they were torn to pieces." He stopped, looked at me straight in the eyes and then continued. "I'd like to ask you a question." I nodded to tell him he could go on.

"Are you also one of the people who were kidnapped and tortured by hunters?" He asked seriously.

"Yes," was my instant reply, in a monotonous voice.

His fist clenched under a reflex while his jaw had contracted. I think I surprised him by my frankness or was it because I had answered by the affirmative? Anyway who would want a bruised body like mine? No one. Apart perhaps a crazy mate in love...

He approached me, but a reflex made me step back a little. Seeing my action, he stopped, frowned, then sat cross-legged in front of me. He stared at me with his deep gray eyes.

"I would not hurt you. Never. You hear me?" I forced myself to shake my head as a sign of acquiescence, not entirely convinced. He sighed.

"Listen, my wolf is very... protective and also needs physical contact."

"There's no way we're going to sleep together," I retorted.

"I didn't say that, we just have to hold our hands and be close to each other, these sorts of things you see," he pressed on each of the words as if he had a child in front of him. I sighed in exasperation.

"I understand that you are somehow obliged to have me on your back because of your wolf. And I'm genuinely sorry," I said irritably. He wanted to interrupt me, but I raised my hand to make a sign to be silent.

"If you like, we can hold our hands in public, but it's out of the question, in the present state of things, that I kiss you or that I sleep with you. I'm not interested in that kind of relationship," I said. His eyes stared at me with a hint of pain that he quickly covered.

"What do you mean by the present state of things?" He asked. Was it all he had understand from my refusal?

"Let's say morally, I'm not in a good state of mind," I tried to explain by not revealing all the information. He must have suspected that I myself was tortured.

Even if our wolves had accepted each other, for me he was still a stranger. I couldn't trust him overnight. Trust was a thing that settled over time. He should be glad that I deign to speak to him.

I heard Lulu stirring at me a little haughty.

"I remind you that it was you who put me in this mess with this man," I replied to her behavior, but she preferred to be silent.

"There were other people in my pack who were also kidnapped, maybe you could recognize some of them and talk to them..." Adam advised. "I know you recognized my brother earlier in the forest. You could talk to him."

His brother? So Alex was his big brother? He had confessed to me that he had a little brother named Adam, but I never thought he would be that man. Alex was his big brother and normally it was the oldest to take over the place of the chief of a pack.

"Why Alex isn't the Alpha?" I asked.

"Let's say that morally, he was not in a good state of mind," he answered, repeating my words. "After he returned miraculously to us, he was no longer the same. He refused the title of Alpha, so I took his place."

I nodded gently, understanding the reasons for his refusal. No one was unharmed by such torturous experience.

"We could get to know each other for now," he wished, hopeful. When he behaved like this I felt like the last of the bitches.

I nodded. Again. And he sighed. Again.

"I was traveling last week on another territory. I have to discuss with Luke and my parents about a few things. You can go downstairs and make yourself at home," he said, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. "Don't wait for me to sleep. I don't know how long it will take."

He looked at me while waiting for some answer that I didn't give. He told me bye before going out of the room. I didn't know if it was disappointment that I felt deep in his voice or boredom.

I remained motionless until the front door closed again. I apprehended all these acts and gestures, forcing me to be constantly tense and on my guard when there was perhaps no need to be. Not knowing what to do until dinner, I began my exploration of the house.

Walking towards the stairs, I turned on the light to discover several photos hanging on the white walls. I could see Adam at different ages, he was cute and adorable. Then he had turned into a handsome and attractive man. He had certainly to turn many women's heads.

Lulu grunted at my thoughts, sowing doubt in my mind. If he were with other women before me, he would see disappointment by discovering that his mate was an ugly and bruised woman. I sighed before continuing my contemplations.

A little bigger than the other pictures, Adam was in the company of people whom I supposed to be his parents as well as his brother. The two brothers had taken from their father. Body, color of their hair, face, smile. His mother wasn't the woman with whom Adam had spoken earlier. But she was just as beautiful and delicate as a flower. From her look and her big smile she seemed gentle and warm.

And Alex stood there, proud and happy. He was also a man of my past. A very dear friend who had been locked in a cage a few meters from mine. When we weren't beaten or worse, we often talked amongst ourselves, the prisoners. He was a sincerely good person. A person like there are no many.

"Alex," I breathed. An affectionate smile lit up my face as I touched his image with a finger.

I went downstairs and joined the kitchen. It was spacious, modern and laid out. Gray and red colors shaded the room.

I rummaged through the closet and the refrigerator to find some appetizing food. I was tired of all the changes in my life that I had to put up with. I had also exhausted my energy playing with the children. I chose the option of simplicity and made me pasta.

After the quick dinner, I went up to Adam's room. I pushed myself under the blanket and wished my wolf a good night before letting my body relax and fly to the land of dreams.

***

I gently opened my eyes as I stretched out on the strange bed. Panicked, I straightened up and looked around to remember where I was. In the pack of Adam. Far from home. Of the only people I considered a bit like my family...

Outside, I could see the dark night and the time on the alarm clock showed me two o'clock. I didn't need to sleep seven or eight hours a night like other people. The angel blood had altered my metabolism, making it more effective. So I didn't need as many hours to be in good shape, but only three or four hours.

In front of the bed, a soft light was on and I heard a slight snoring. The silhouette asleep on the chair reminded me of Adam. What was he doing there? Shouldn't he come back only tomorrow?

I handed a semblance of order to my mop and then stood up to find myself near the man sleeping face on his desk. His computer was on standby and many sheets were scattered on the table and even on the floor. I knelt to pick up the papers of different colors. All of sudden Adam whispered incomprehensible things. By the fear of having awakened him, I raised my head to be fixed for a moment by the vision that was offered to me.

His black hair, as dark as the plumages of ravens, blended wonderfully with the starry night in the sky. Since I was little, I loved watching the sky, whether it was day or night. It was inaccessible, but vast as the world and always changing. By day, the wind played with the clouds that inhabited there while the night, the stars lit up one by one. In a never-ending cycle, the moon and the sun were hunting each other forever.

Adam relaxed body and his rested face made him look almost childish and adorable. A tender smile stretched my lips.

Should I consider myself fortunate to have such a man in my life? I didn't know. Not yet at least. For the moment, he had been calm and understanding. But how was he when he was angry? I dared not even imagine.

I put the sheets back on his desk and went to get a sheet from his closet. I wanted to put it on him as Elisa did with Jake. But a doubt overwhelmed me. Isn't that something we do like a sign of affection towards a person we love? If he woke up with the blanket on him, would he take it as a proof of attachment?

Love was a confused feeling for me. I knew there were differents way of loving. To love a man was different than to love a friend or to love a member of his family. Love, I saw it every time my parents looked at each other. I could also see it when they looked at me. I knew that these loves were of different forms, but were both experienced with great intensity.

"Love is stronger than anything," my mother repeated often, adding that I would understand when I grew up. But even now, I didn't really understand the meaning of this sentence. How long should I grow up to understand it? I should have asked her... Now, it was too late.

The sheet, which I supposed to be of a dark color, covered his back and broad shoulders. I was surprised to see that he had hardly moved when I had covered him. Werewolves were beings who generally only slept with one eye closed because of the many enemies that could arise from nowhere. But he was deeply asleep and kept that serene face. I stopped being hypnotized by his face and went into the bathroom to make my toilet trying to make as little noises as possible to avoid waking up Adam.

I went downstairs to get to work. Household. Just dust off some shelves and mop the floor to change my mind. After finishing cleaning all the rooms on the ground floor, I went to the kitchen to prepare a hearty breakfast. After this cleansing session, I was hungry. I made some pancakes and left some for Adam.

The rays of the sun caressed the interior of the kitchen and the living room with its shimmering colors. I sat cross-legged on the coffee table of the living room and swallowed my breakfast while enjoying the incessant noises of the forest that came from the window I had left open. The rush of the animals, the rustling of the leaves, the crackling of branches, the smell of trees and fresh grass, all in the forest calmed me. I preferred to spend my life under the stars in a vast forest than to find myself between four walls forever. My wolf would have been delighted to go out a little more of my human body. And I confessed that being a wolf gave an unparalleled sense of freedom.

Suddenly I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Adam still had his hair disheveled and stared at me with his worried eyes. His shoulders sank with infinite relief as soon as he saw me.

He strode toward me as I stood confused. I wanted to speak when he took me in his arms and squeezed me against him as if his life depended on it. I was so surprised by his action that my body remained tense. It was impossible for me to render her embrace. So many indefinite feelings passed into my mind.

His head lay in the hollow of my neck. He suddenly inhaled and murmured my name with a sigh of relief. Did he think I had run away or that yesterday was a dream? This may well explain his current behavior.

"Adam," I called, uncomfortably.

He released me without removing the arms around me. He looked me straight in the eyes. And I did the same. I was subdued by his gray eyes just as he was by mine.

Conflicting feelings raged inside me while Lulu enjoyed this moment of intimacy shared with his mate.

"Our mate," she said.

I could have groan at him if I wasn't so afraid of myself and my reactions. This little plague of Lulu was amused by my situation. I was certain by listening her chuckles ravaging my head.

An exaggerated throat scratching surprised both of us. Again, because of Adam, I was no longer on the lookout for those around me. This man really had the gift of distracting me. This was to cease at all costs.