Cisco's POV

  The death of Barry hit everybody hard. I hear even Oliver cried. Iris has been in her apartment for three days now. Me? I've been at S.T.A.R Labs. I tried Vibing him, to see if maybe he's just in the speed force again. But I could never get the courage to touch my- his suit.

  I sat in the middle of the cortex, staring at the suit. "Anyone here," a female voice called. I knew that voice and I'd recognize it anywhere. "Hey Caitlin," I answered. "How you holding up?"

"Barely."

  She set her purse down on the comand center, and sat down next to me. She stared longingly at the suit, wishing for him to come back, no doubt. We sat there for a long while, hoping for our friend to come zipping through the doors. But he never did. Instead Caitlin turned her head to me, thinking of something to say. Before she could say a word my I felt the desolate gouge in my heart growing larger.

  It was a long time before we spoke and I was beginning to feel the silence echoing through the room. "You know," she said without loosing eye contact with the suit. "Barry and I once went to a karaoke bar." I could see her weak smile through the corner of my eye. She lifted herself off the floor, and proceeded to stretch her hand to me. For the first time in hours, I took my eyes off the suit. I tried to smile at her, with no luck. I took hold of her hand, helping me to get off the ground myself.

-

  We stepped into the bar where it expectantly smelled like alcohol. We sat down at the bar and Catlin ordered tequila. I didn't think of her to take such strong drinks. I figured one of us should stay sober, so I ordered a club soda. When we got our drinks she downed hers really fast and started a tab.

  "Oh, come on," she pleaded. "Don't be such a party-pooper." I was taking away her ninth drink. "You are very drunk and should probably start drinking water," I said almost thinking she'd do what I told her. She turned around to the stage and watched the singers nearly puke on stage. When they ran off stage she looked at me with pleading eyes. I sighed and she grabbed me by the arm, nearly ripping it off. I drank about half the glass of whatever it was she ordered, before she could pull me away.

  I was buzzed, but I couldn't exactly tell you the song we sang. All I can say for sure is, we were both smiling at the end. "It was Cisco, right?" I turned to my right to find a smiling Lynda Park. "Hey, Lynda," I greeted her. "You know," her voice lowered. " I haven't seen The Flash around lately." My heart dropped. Even with the alcohol in front of me, I was constantly reminded of the loss of my friend. It was like I was in a pit of emptiness, and I was sinking deeper. But every time I neared the top, someone shoved me back in.

  I could feel the tears falling from my face. My hair was blocking the sides of my head from being seen as I hung it in sorrow. Caitlin touched my shoulder. She was drunk, and she was still crying over it. She hugged me, and Lynda knew something was wrong. "What don't I know," she was growing concerned. "Barry," I paused. Should I tell her? She has a right to know. But she didn't know him great in the first place. But she does know he was The Flash. "Barry isn't with us anymore."

  "He quit being The Flash." She pieced together. "Not quite. He- he died," I said fighting the tears and losing. "What do you mean he died? He can't die, he's The Flash!" Thankfully, no one heard her little outburst, and the secret was safe. I pulled her by the shoulder to a corner of the bar, that was dimly lit and vacant.

  "Look," I said trying not to raise my voice. "He is gone, and there is nothing we can do about it! It's hard enough to acept it without you shouting it in public places! He's gone and worst of all, I got to see him. Die right in front of me. Now that his life is over its like mine is too. So there's nothing that you can say, anyone can say to change that."

  "Cisco, it's not your fault," she said soothingly, hand on my back. I couldn't face her. Not while I was crying anyway.

  "Yes it is," I shouted. I was losing it. The more I spoke, the more my true emotions spewed out. "I could have saved him! I spent countless hours at the lab, figuring how to save iris, but I could have worked harder! Hard enough to save them both! I was and at him for not going back in time to save my brother, but now he's gone, and that one's all on me." I shook my head, knowing what I just said made zero sense to her.

  I walked back to the bar an grabbed Caitlin. Who knows how many drinks she had in her by now. We- I closed up the tab and half carried her out. I had her lay down in the back seat of her car, while I drive. It wasn't a long drive to her apartment, but it certainly was nerve wracking. I had a beer and half a glass of who knows what was in that glass, so if an officer pulled me over, I'd get a DUI.

  When we arrived, I had to carry her in, due to the fact of her being asleep. I hope I didn't look too suspicious to the people in the lobby. I took the elevator cause there's no way in the world I'd carry her up several flights of stairs. In any circumstances. I was glad to see her gaining conciseness so that she could change out of her own pencil skirt. I helped her into her room, took a pair of her pyjamas from her closet, and sat down on her couch. Let's be honest, I wasn't driving home.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket, almost as much as I was. I looked at it and it was an email. Normally I wouldn't give a second thought about getting an email, but this one was from the District Attorney. I opened it up and it told me that someone was coming over in about a week. I closed my eyes, thinking of Barry. How I miss him. I thought back to the time he fist woke up. The time he showed us his powers. And how forgiving he was when I told Snart his identity. Or when I told them about my powers. I caught myself from falling asleep a few times. The memories of his orange lighting overtook me as I finally slipped from conciseness.

Barry Allen was my best friend.