Limerence
You and are sitting at the bar with Steve explaining to him about your dream. " It was so real Steve. It was different from the visions, there was no headache or pain. I know it was only a dream but I could feel the heat and smell blood in the air. His screams, I can still hear them ringing in my ears."
He reaches out and rubs your arms to help calm you. " I wish I could do something more to reassure you that Loki is ok."
About that time Steve looks past you to the balcony. You turn and see the Bifrost close, leaving Loki and Thor standing there. You immediately jump up and run to Loki. Loki quickly walks towards you, not wanting to show the extent of his happiness to see you.
As you reach Loki, you take his face in your hands looking for reassurance that he is in fact, safe. Thor walks over to Steve to give you both a moment and to escape the awkwardness of the situation.
You look up at Loki. " I was so sure that something had happened to you. It was too realistic..." You drop your voice a little. "Just like the first one."
Unaware of his actions, he has placed his hands on your hips." It's all right, Love. I assure you that I am fine. I also had a dream that was too real though. Just as my brother was coming to find me on Asgard, I dreamt that I had lost you to Thanos. The image is painfully burned in my mind."
Thor looks at Steve and sees a very concerned but puzzled look on his friends face. "Are you ok, my friend?"
Steve doesn't remove his gaze from you and Loki. " I'm not really sure. Something is going on, I don't know what it is yet but I'm going to find out."
"I agree. My brother seemed to have had a similar dream about Lady Stark as she did of him. I trust my brother that his intentions our still well meaning when it comes to Lark but I agree that there is something going on that neither of them are sharing at the moment."
Steve thinks back to his conversation with Clint in the truck. Are his fears of Lark feeling something more towards Loki true? His heart sinks just a little bit as the doubt creeps back in.
" I wish I was as confident as you are in your brother."
You and Loki sit down out on the balcony. You look at Loki concerned. "You had a similar dream at almost the same time as mine?"
Loki looks down at his hands. "Yes, Love and it felt very real. I'm very relieved to see that it was just a dream."
You look at him with a realization. " Loki is this the first dream you've had like mine?"
Loki looks at you and his breath quickens. " No Pet, it's not. I'm sorry, I didn't tell you but I didn't want to upset you."
"Loki, was your first dream like mine?" You ask as your back straightens bracing for his answer.
" Yes, it was Lark. I was embarrassed to tell you. I didn't want you to be angry."
" Is that why you acted so oddly the other day? You had the dream didn't you? Why is this happening Loki? Is Ms. Hyde manipulating both of us?" You are having a hard time looking him in the eye. Where are these feelings coming from?
Loki shifts and takes your hands. "No, it is not. That is why I needed to go to Asgard."
You finally look at Loki and can see a tenderness in his eyes. "What is going on Loki, please explain this to me?"
He takes a deep breath unsure of how you will react to what he is about to tell you. " It seems the combination of me using my magic inside your mind and the Stone fragments, a type of magic bond has formed. The books on Asgard call it a Limerence Bond. It is a consequence of the spell that I did not know about when I cast it."
You look at Loki confused." But what does that mean?"
Loki looks down at his feet and doesn't respond.
" Loki what does that mean?" You say with a stern tone.
He finally looks up at you and sighs."It is described as a state of being emotionally attached to another and can be a near-obsessive form of romantic love. This bond is even more intensely fueled by the Mind Stone. It is virtually unbreakable."
You stare at Loki trying to understand what he just said. " I love Steve and that's not going to change. I.. I..I don't love you Loki."
A look of disappointment flashes across Loki's face. " I know that Lark. I would never ask you to betray your feelings for your Captain but I know you feel something for me also. It's why we are sharing the same dreams. I won't lie to you Lark, I am not accustom to feeling this way about someone. Please, be honest with me now. Do you have feelings for me?"
Your head is spinning from trying to make sense of all this. "I...I don't know what I'm feeling. I love Steve but it scared me to think that I had lost you. It hurt down to my soul watching you..."
"Die, my love. I know, I felt the same way when I saw your body in my dream. I know your heart belongs to another but I can't deny the effect you have over me, either. I will do my best to control my feelings but there is a good chance they will get stronger for both of us."
You stand up and look down at Loki. You love Steve with every fiber of your being but you know how hollow you felt at the thought of losing Loki. Is it possible to give your soul to two people? To want to share your body and heart with one but your mind and soul needing another to live?
Loki stands up and takes your hands. You pull them away. "Loki, I can't do this right now. I need sometime to think about all of this. I need to get some sleep."
You turn to walk away but pause. You look over your shoulder slightly. " I'll be honest, I do care about you Loki, more than I realized. I just need time to sort this out and I need to talk to Steve.
Good night Loki, I'm glad you are Ok"
He looks at you with such longing but content to just be in the same room as you. "Good night Lark."
You walk back in and up to the bar. Steve stands up and looks down at you. "What's going on Lark?"
You look up at him and take his hands in yours. "We need to talk." Steve's heart drops into his stomach with those words. Are his worst thoughts about to become real? "I don't want to do this out here. Can we go back to my room?" You say trying to figure out how to tell him the truth.
You both are silent as you walk back to your room. You close the door and and take a deep breath as you walk over to the decanters sitting on your bookshelf. You grab the scotch and pour two glasses and walk over to Steve. You sit across from him as you hand him a glass.
"Is it that bad Lark? Please talk to me. I just got you back, I can't lose you again."
You eyes shoot up and meet his. "You'll never lose me, ever, but I'm afraid you might walk away again."
"Lark, whatever it is, please just tell me."
"The dreams Loki and I had tonight are a side effect of the magic he used on me and the Mind Stone. It's created a magical bond between us that he doesn't think can be broken."
Steve takes a sip and lets the liquid ease its way down his throat. " Ok, so it's some kind of psychic bond. We can deal with that."
You look down and swirl the amber liquid around in the glass. "It's called a Limerence Bond and it's an extreme emotional attachment."
Steve leans forward, putting his elbows on his knees and hangs his head. "By extreme emotional attachment you mean a romantic attachment don't you?"
You pause before letting the words come out. "Yes, and there's something else you need to know."
Steve shifts back in to the seat and runs his hand through his hair. "What else is there?"
Your voice starts to crack a little. "I need you to know that I love you and I want a life with you." You inhale deeply trying to push your stomach back down where it belongs. " This wasn't the first dream I had about Loki. There was another one, it was before you came back."
Tears start to form in Steve's eyes but he doesn't want you to see them so he tilts his head back in the chair. "You can tell me, Lark. I want to know what it was about." He already suspects deep down just by your reluctancy to say it.
A tear falls from your eye knowing what this is going to do to him. " We..we made love in the dream." You can't hold the tears back any longer. "I'm so sorry Steve. I don't want to hurt you but we promised no more secrets, no matter what."
Steve continues to stare at the ceiling listening to the pain in your voice. His jaw tenses as he says. "Did Loki have one also?"
"I didn't know until tonight. That's why he left for Asgard before you came back. He didn't understand it either."
You can't look at Steve any longer knowing the pain you must be causing him right now. You stand up and put your glass on the shelf as you step out on to the balcony. You use the railing to hold yourself up as you let the tears flow freely.
You feel a strong pair of arms wrap around your waist. Steve rests his chin on your head. "I don't care how unbreakable this magical bond is or how hard I have to fight, I'm not letting you go."
The combination of his words and strong arms wrapped around you gave you the safety to let everything go. You cry so hard, releasing every emotion you've had contained since you woke from the dream. Your legs start to give out under the stress but Steve's arms are there to hold you up.
"Just let it out. I've got you." Is all he says to you
You just let go, your body being completely supported by Steve's. He slowly eases you down to the floor and cradles you in his arms. You both sit there not saying a word, just allowing each other to be with their thoughts. He holds you until you fall asleep from exhaustion as the night sky starts to lighten.
He slowly picks you up and lays back down in bed with you. Steve kisses your head gently as he drifts off to sleep.
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