"Hey, Mr Business, how do ya do~?" You sing quietly as the kettle boils. You carefully cut two slices from the carrot cake that you definitely aren't going to steal some of later, setting them out neatly on plates with bunny-decorated napkins and everything. The only other challenge is getting the cups out... yeah, you're going to need a chair to get up to the cupboard. Crap. "Can we get a triple for you~?"

You finish with the orders quickly, setting the cake and the drinks onto a tray before hopping the counter (not holding it, of course). There's a little bounce in your step as you hum through the rest of the lines, picking up the tray and making your way over to your first three customers' table. They picked a good one, right by the window. You can see a few people milling around outside spotting them and staring curiously at the sign.

"Thank you so much~!" The girl - who you've now figured out is called Uraraka through totally-not-eavesdropping - chirps, instantly digging in to her carrot cake. You get similar replies from the other two, just offering a smile in return. You turn to head back to the counter and attempt to secretly scroll through tumblr when Robot Boi™ speaks up.

"How much will this be?" He asks, right arm attempting to karate chop the table. Oh well, you don't really give a shit. If he breaks it, your brother has to pay, not you, and that will be fucking hilarious.

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." You glance back at the menu, cursing your slow mental maths skills. Can't they just figure it out themselves? Oh wait, your brother made everything overpriced as hell. You roll your eyes at the 700 yen pricing for a slice of cake, turning and confidently saying: "About 1390 yen."

"But that looks like just the cost of both our carrot cakes..." 'Deku' - you're pretty sure that isn't his actual name - frowns.

You wave your hand dismissively. "Nah, that crap's overpriced. Let's just say we're having a sale."

"Aww, but we should really pay the full amount!" Uraraka protests, brandishing her fork like a mighty weapon. "It's opening day and everything!"

"R-Right!" Deku says.

Robot Boi™ nods. "Exactly. Not paying enough doesn't sit right with me!"

You feel your heart melt a little at their purity. With a dramatic sigh, you slump a little against their table. "Fiiine. How about this..." You turn and crouch, resting your elbows on your knees and your head in your hands as you smile. "You pay the 1390 today, and come back 'nd buy some crap tomorrow. If you really wanna, you can pay properly then. Sound good?"

"Orrrrr," Uraraka says, pointing her fork dangerously close to your face. You go cross-eyed looking at it. "We could pay the full amount now."

"No deal." You hop up and skrrt your way back to the counter, once again climbing over it rather than using the flap.

Another customer appears, keeping them from responding, and you serve them normally this time. They just want a black coffee and a chocolate-chip cookie, so soon enough they're paying the thousand yen or so price - complaining about it whilst they do so; you send the teens at the widow a pointed look - and leaving. The trio comes up with their tray shortly after.

"It was fun meeting you, Y/n! The cake and cocoa was great!" Uraraka beams. She has a little chocolate moustache over her top lip. She's fucking adorable.

"Yes, thank you!" Deku says. What did you do to deserve these little rays of sunshine as your first customers? They're warming your cold, dead heart, and that's a big no-no. Ain't no one allowed to drag you back from the depths of hell.

"No problemo, boblemo." You boop Uraraka.

Robot Boi™ places some money on the counter, and the three of them head out. A self-satisfied smile forms on your face at the sight of 1390 yen.

"See you tomorrow, Y/n~!"

Okay, so maybe you'll like this job.