Writers: a sad, sad, smut writer (@KingChocoFacialHair), 

Editors: the same sad, sad, scared smut writer at like 3 am.

**SLAMS DOOR OPEN** WHAT THE LIVING F*** IS UP, ITS 3 AM AND THE RECAP LITERALLY HAS NOTHING DONE. Like seriously. We have 2 f***ing bullet points and nothing else. It feels great to be me, Smutler, right now, because I'm doing the entire recap in like a few hours.

Now, remember, since this is Smutler and Smutler alone at 3 am with no impulse control, **this will descend into chaos.** And I think Llama suggested for us to be practical or something and merge it with next week or delay it until Tuesday but WHO THE **** NEEDS THAT WHEN YOU HAVE NO SELF PRESERVATION.

Sob I need to start writing bullet points and there are 160 notfis, which isn't bad, but sob im scared :((((( (this was before i did all the rest of the bullet points)

Now, instead of doing follower counts first like some kind of pleb, Ima tell you all that AHyperFerret posted on our message board:

"You know (paragraph space thing) Imagine (another paragraph space thing), imagine if someone we all admired found the recap (paragraph space thing) (**YOU GUESSED IT ANOTHER PARAGRAPH F***KING SPACE THING***)"

Very good question thing Ferret my man :) They suggested the Mcdonalds Wattpad account, and I mean, I would freak out. But also I would be very happy- i mean we would be very happy if like- Elvis Presly found the account, or maybe Beyonce. :OOO OR MORGAN FREEMAN. :OOOOOOO or white science guy or black science guy. Bill DeGrass and Tyson Nye.

Okay so like- i know I should get on with the follower milestones but wheeze the recap got 700 followers and that's pretty nice nglllll. We might have to stop following back or get another account for following people because the following limit is 1000.

Oh great Wattpad is deciding to stop working this is fine I'm fine yes yes we are fine everything is fine sob im breaking down why is wattpad not working you piece of shit site work please i need you to work its 3:10 please work please please please

Ok so update Wattpad isnt working- to give you some insight into this horrible way of life, basically, throughout the week, we place bullet points- and around the end, usually Wednesday to Saturday, we convert it into paragraphs. So. There are no bullet points. N o bu l l e t p o in ts. I've added like 4 in the last 20 or so minutes but other than that.

So, wattpad is crashing and wont load. Meaning I don't have a way of getting content for the Recap.

SharkBait1323666, your name is a **pain** to type, but also, you said Chicken Fountain and I have now decided that I respect you greatly.

****AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*** is how i feel currently

Its okay im cool its good nothings burning except for everything.

Uhhh YEA OK FOLLOWER COUNTS- Lets go MissSciFiNerd1111 got two thumbs and 55 followers, ah yes, shockfaktor got 50 followers yes yes y es good GOOD. Leviosa_Lily got the extravagant majestic, amazing huge yes number that is 869 (+1) followers haha funny meme number lol lmaoooo- minecraftfan32 got 100 followers ah yes ah yes amazing job you should be very proud the first 100 are yes. DracoDragonGirl got 300 followers honestly huge yes to you amazing splendid.

Also guess what CallMeDick i mean CallMeSausage got 685 followers ***P O G*** ah yes yesyesyes amazing splendid. Also That-One-Genderfluid got 1.3k followers woohoo great job yes yes

Being serious, _GMAN_ gave a very good idea to everyone. We make a tribute, an art tribute, to those who have left us. I believe this is a very good and amazing idea, and really, we should try to organize something like that. _GMAN_ , if you want us to publish a book or something so people can send in art and learn about it from our profile, our DMS are just a few clicks away.

tIME FOR BOOKS BECAUSE IM DEAD INSIDE AND ALSO HAPPEN TO BE GAY.

Starting us off is Anon1909 who wrote a wonderful False-centered avatar AU, itS DARKER THAN MY BASEMENT AND I LOVE IT AND SOB THE WRITING STYLE IS UNIQUE YES YES YES-

The wondrous Ariyaquila is back from a short internet break and wrote sOME GODDAMN AMAZING X AND EX HURT/COMFORT, tHIS MADe ME FEEL FOR THE FIRST TIME IN AGES

ShinyTheWeirdo wrote an aDORABLY FLUFFY FAMILY FIC WHERE a feW HerMITS ARE SHEEPS AND GOATS AND LIKE OH MY GOD CAN WE JUST YES???? MORE??? PLEASE??? (Fandome wants to comment that Sheep!Grian is becoming one of their favorite aus)

Peregrine234 WAS A F***KING BOSS AND WROTE AN ***8000*** WORD CLEO-FOCUSED ANGST STORY AND OH MY W HA T. 8 0 0 0 WO RDS?!?!?!?!? AND LIKE ITS SUPER GOOD!??!?!?! LIKE EXCUSE ME LIKE LEAVE SOME TALENT FOR THE REST OF US MY MAN. Teach me your ways, I need to learn how to make smut that long.

And last but certainly not least, _mochii112_ wrote some awesome hurt/comfort flangst for- oWO R E N D U B S ? THIS RAREPAIR IS HUGE YES IN MY BOOK, YES PLEASE THANK YOU FOR THIS PIECE OF ABSOLUTE ART.

Alright some random other stuff now- _adrilia_announced that Team Angst won for the second time in a row, GG to everyone wHO PARTICIPATED IN FLUFF vs. ANGST 2.0 WOOT WOOT. (Team Hurt/Comfort is always the best -Fandome) (Half of me wants to figure out what the hell this is and join so I can make smut and make everyone even more tired of my goddamn bs :) -YourFriendlyNeighboorhoodSmutWriter)

Also, Smutler aka KingChocoFacialHair is getting cancelled. I know this happened like a week ago but I'm being cancelled y'all- you can choose your pick of what I've done now- #SmutlerIsOverParty #SmutlerIsCancelled #AndIOopSmutlerOut

Now being serious- we are extremely sorry for the delay. I know that a few of us recap members had rough weeks in mental health and shit, and we will try to get a schedule going. Sorry again. Remember- Recap Applications are always open, and we will try to read through them consistently- that reminds me I gotta read through them.

Also sorry for the short recap we tryin to get back into the flow :(((((

Please have an amazing day, DM us if you want in on the Hermittpad Community Discod (we have goldfish), and remember to pay your taxes. Cya next week!~