(Content warnings: gun violence, stabbings, scars [no, not GoodtimewithScar] Samgladiator and some type of pretending to be someone because of abuse? Idk what to call it honestly.)

     Grian wanted to scream.

     Like a deep scream that came from his very soul that would tell his life story in a single sound. He couldn't do it with his starter house being so close to everyone else in Boatem.

     Laying in bed and staring at the ceiling, he could practically feel his brain splitting. He didn't know who he was. He knew it happens every so often but it doesn't randomly show up while he is doing nothing. It's if he has been mining for days in an endless hole. If he has to travel over land for hours at a time. If he has a large build that leaves him in the dark even makes him feel like he was splitting. But bedtime? When he is safe, comfy, and warm in his bed with no worries? Never once had happened before.

     Closing his eyes, he wondered if he could just sleep it off.

---

     Waking up in the morning, he stretched. It was oddly quiet outside, he expect to hear gunshots echoing the concrete jungle.

     He looked to the side of his bed to the table. He didn't recognize it or any of the items on it. He huffed, thinking it was a prank.

     Getting up, he went in search of his headphones although everything was strangely blurry.

     Digging through his chests, he couldn't find the checkered headphones. Only strange items, clothing, food and the all too familiar gun. He picked it up, feeling the heavy weight in his hand. Never can't be too prepared for mob violence. He clicked the safety on and off, testing it to make sure it was going to be safe to walk around with. He always made sure to do so everytime before he left the apartment.

     Quickly getting dressed in a vaguely recognizable sweater and jeans, he clipped the holster to his belt, putting the gun inside so he could take it with him. He yawned, going to the bathroom. Flicking on the light, he froze at the blanket on the mirror. It looked like it had been put up ages ago but he didn't remember putting it up himself. Pulling it down, he gasped at his hair. It was a bit shorter than usual and was a light tint compared to his usual raven black hair. He needed to fix it.

     Going to the chests again, he found some ink he saw earlier. He remembers dyeing his hair ages ago but he felt rusty. Taking the black dye into his hands, he started to rub it into his hair.

---

     "Grian! Meeting in five minutes!" Knocking was at the door, scaring him from his task of making food. He could remember times making an English breakfast but it was overshadowed by the strange jerky and chips he always ate. He couldn't find such so he was relying on memory.

     "Who is it?" He wiped his hands on a towel and took his gun out of the holster.

     "Grian? Are you alright in there?" The voice sounded american but that still didn't feel right. The only americans he knew were... he could remember one perfectly but the other was... him? He didn't know anymore. All he knew is that this voice was not them nor his Japanese peers he lived with.

     "I'm going to ask you again, who are you?" His voice was confident and his stance with the gun never wavered. He had done this many times.

     "It's me! Impulse! Like one of the two Americans in Boatem and even then, we have really different voices!" He opened the door, hiding the gun from view as he did so. "Woah, Grian, your hair looks different." The man, apparently called Impulse, remarked.

     "Why wouldn't it?" He asked, squinting his eyes. "Also, why do you keep calling for someone named Grian?" Impulse apparently didn't like that answer.

     "Grian, this is no time for messing around unless you have some magical twin that none of us knew about. Also what's it with your talking?"

     "I don't know anyone by the name of Grian and I don't know what you are talking about, this is just how I speak!" He yelled shutting the door. If he had left it open any longer, he might have just shot Impulse right there and then.

---

     Impulse raised an eyebrow. Grian was definitely acting weird. His hair was crudely dyed black, patchy in different places. It was also more shaggy. His voice also seemed different, like he was mocking an American accent. With how determined he was about not being Grian, Impulse didn't know what to think. He sighed, deciding to have an emergency meeting to figure out what was wrong with Grian.

---

     "Grian? Are you in there?" A knock at the door broke his thoughts. A masculine british voice was calling for him. He could hear whispering on the other side of others. He had been trying to stop thinking about 'Grian' since it was hurting his head. He didn't know what they were talking about. The door opened, his head turning up and quickly unclipping his gun out of his belt, safety turned off. He pointed it at the newcomers standing there, confused and unsure of what was happening.

     "Woah, woah! No need to turn the gun on us!" The supposed other American said, raising his hands.

     "Get. Out." He bit back, feeling the pressure. Going against four people by himself would definitely be a task but his training should give him the upper hand. The one with a mustache would be an easy takedown, next would be the one with the large hat, then the girl, and last would be the larger one. He could take on the others but he looked to be a problem.

     "Grian, let's talk about this." The bulky one said, now identified to match the voice from earlier, Impulse.

     He sounded too kind, no way he could hurt a fly. Grian definitely had the upper hand.

     "I don't have much yen so this apartment won't be your best option. Walk away or I put bullets in your heads." He snarled, not showing any weakness. The people looked at each other before walking out. The next problem is that they all sat just outside of his door.

     "Fine but you didn't say anything about loitering!" The one with the large hat exclaimed, pulling out a deck of cards out of it and starting to deal to the group.

     With a click, the door locked.

---

     "Yen is not usual currency here." Impulse muttered, quiet enough that Grian wouldn't hear but so the other Boatem members could.

     "Nor does he have an apartment." Mumbo added, placing a card down.

     "How are you guys missing the fact, He! Has! A! Gun!" Scar enunciated every word, trying to prove his point.

     "He wasn't going to hurt us. He is still Grian." Impulse said, shrugging as he picked up a card from the deck.

     Pearl and Mumbo looked at each other. "This might be a surprise to you two but Grian used to live in a crime ridden city. He would shoot us if he felt threatened." Pearl put down a card and pointed for Scar's turn.

     "Seriously? Like where you pay the mob every month and they sell drugs in your alley?" Impulse asked, shuffling his own cards.

     "Yeah, he didn't live such a good life." Mumbo muttered, dropping a card down.

     "That doesn't explain the whole get-up though." Scar  hid a card in his hat, everyone trying not to laugh at the absurdity of his cheating.

     "Hey, not Grian!" Mumbo called through the door.

     "What!" A muffled response came from inside.

     "What's your name!"

     "Taurtis!"

---

     Pearl almost dropped her cards from that revelation.

     "Taurtis?"

     "Yes, now shut up and leave me alone!"

     Scar placed a card down and cheered. "Yes, I win! Finally!" He took out his notebook of wins v. losses of everytime they played UNO. Impulse had the most at 40 and Scar had the least at negative 20. How he got negative?

     "Nope, loss of points for cheating." Impulse pointed out, Scar muttering under his breath and scratching his point out.

     "I never win!" He groaned, being shushed by Mumbo. The mustached man was looking at Pearl who looked like she was having an epiphany.

     "Taurtis..."

     "Yeah, that's what he said. Who is that?" Impulse started to put the cards into a neat pile.

     "His best friend."

---

     Taurtis just wanted the annoying strangers to leave. They were jabbering about the game they were playing and about that person. He just grumbled and sat back on the couch. The gun was resting in his hands if they entered again, for him to defend himself against the lunatics.

     He felt his eyes droop, he was feeling sleepy.

     Sitting upright, he couldn't just fall asleep with dangerous people outside! For all he knows, they have backup ready to kill him. He needs to stay awake-

     Drool escaped his mouth as he snored.

---

     "So you are telling me that Taurtis was his bestfriend and nobody has any idea why he is acting like him?" Scar recaped, looking at Pearl like she grew two heads.

     "Yeah, I have met him before and Taurtis isn't exactly like that." Mumbo assured.

     "Does anyone know about his past when he lived with Taurtis in highschool?" Impulse wondered.

     "I know that Xisuma does." They turned to Pearl. "He has files on everyone, Grian had a long meeting in order to join Hermitcraft. Xisuma does it as safety precautions." They all nodded their heads, an idea forming.

---

     It wasn't the smartest idea, but stealing the file of Grian's life story from Xisuma's office was the only one they could think of.

     Flicking through the pages, they all divided it evenly.

     "Went to highschool with a few friends in Japan... there are a few instances highlighted here." Impulse spoke up, holding his portion of the file. "He had a lot of problems with the police when he was younger."

     "The police? He doesn't seem like that kind of person." Scar said as he flipped on of his pages over.

     "Yeah, he helped stop a murderer, he lived with the murderer's boyfriend... wait!" They all paused at his outburst. Impulse looked up at them. "Taurtis was stabbed!"

---

     Taurtis woke up a few hours later, neck hurting from where he was positioned. Wiping the drool off his chin, he got up. His mouth felt dry.

     Going to the kitchen, he filled up a glass. Strange how it wasn't red solo cups. Each would be etched with their names, Sam, Taurtis and-

     He shook his head. Taurtis could barely make out a name but he didn't believe it.

     A sound of the door breaking down caught his ears. Turning, he reached for his gun but realized he left it on the couch. Cursing, he ran for it but was tackled.

     "Sorry, Grian, but we can't have you shooting us." The large one said, a sympathetic smile on his face.

     "Get off! I'm Taurtis! Not Grian!" He screamed, trying to get out from under Impulse.

     "If your name is Taurtis, who is Grian to you?" Taurtis looked up at the girl, Pearl, he remembered.

     "He isn't anyone! He doesn't exist!" He bit back, continuing to roll around.

     "Then what about the playground incident?" The one with the mustache said. Mumbo, if he recalled.

     "I don't know about anything like that!" It was impossible to move Impulse off of him. There was no way he was going to be able to. Doesn't mean he wouldn't try though.

     "It's an incident in a police report. At yandere highschool in Japan." Taurtis turned back to Pearl.

     "How do you know where I went to highschool!" He shouted, becoming more scared. This had to be some mob if they knew information like that.

     "The police report says that Samgladiator was harrassing you with bootleg Dorito chips." Pearl read the page out loud, looking to see Taurtis' reaction.

     "So what? I love Toritos."

     "Well, Sam was on the run for a few days after that because he went insane. Teachers and students have documented their accounts on the situation."

     "Sam is a good man! He was just messing around!" Taurtis defended, going back to trying to kick Impulse off.

     "Then how do you explain that Taurtis was in the hospital having surgery that same day?" He seemed to stop struggling. Processing the information.

     "I don't know, I was there! I witnessed it all!"

     "Students and teachers alike recall how they tried to fend off Samgladiator the whole time. They knew that you are not Taurtis, you are Grian. Sam had stabbed the real Taurtis in the stomach and forces you to dress up as him in some sick fantasy. You are Grian, not Taurtis." Taurtis let out a scream mixed with a cry. It came from his gut, echoing in his house.

     Impulse got off, allowing him to cover his ears and curl up. He started rambling about how he was but wasn't Grian. How he was so confused and had no idea what was happening. He looked sick, skin pale and sweat beading off of his forehead. He looked tired.

     But after awhile of sitting there and sobbing, he became more aware.

     Coughing, he looked up at his friends. "I-I'm sorry..." he whispered, voice raw. Scar held out the abandoned glass of water.

     "It's alright, Grian. Calm down." Grian took it and hastily chugged it, the others fretting and telling him not to drink so much. The only sounds that inhabited the house were Grian's sniffles.

     "So, Grian," Pearl started, "do you want to explain anything?" He sighed and nodded his head.

     "On Halloween, we were dared by our partners to go into the school at night. Whoever stayed the longest would win."

     "You had a partner?" Scar asked him.

     "Yeah, MajoEllen. We are still in contact with each other but we decided to break up after Sam, Taurtis and I got transferred to another school. I'm guessing you read X's files. It was after the shootout incident."

     "That actually happened?" Impulse asked, sounding baffled.

     "Yeah, happened a few times but not every single one made it to reports. Anyways, we stayed in the school for however long we could. We eventually got scared by the ghost of the old teacher that committed suicide, and the competition ended." Grian leaned on Mumbo, the taller wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "I don't remember what caused it because I have been so preoccupied on what happened after but I do know that Sam and Taurtis got into an argument." He grimaced at the last part. "It changed so quick that I didn't know what was happening. Sam stabbed Taurtis in the stomach with the knife of his murderous, mob daughter, girlfriend. I don't know what happened with Sam that night, I was getting ready to leave for England just before. Taurtis, the pychopath he is, decided to steal the bus from the fish people and drive me back." He let out a shuddering breath. "He crashed the bus and I had to carry him all the way to the hospital by myself. I stayed with him every single day in the hospital room by his side when I wasn't at school or with Sam.

     "A few days after Halloween, when I was getting dressed to go to school, I was forced by Sam into wearing and pretending to be Taurtis." Grian closed his eyes, like he was imagining it. "I was supposed to sit there and pretend for my bestfriend to be the friend he stabbed. He got worse. If I denied any of it, he would scream at me for hours or hit me. It went on for a month like that. We found Taurtis in a playground and he became some crazy version named Jerry. It went on for so long that me and my classmates were starting to become convinced of the allusion." He let out a sigh, bowing his head. "I became Taurtis and it has haunted me ever since. I sometimes switch to his thinking. Randomly, I start talking like him or doing the things he used to do. X had to become aware of it. He knows and he has helped me with this before. As Taurtis, I become someone dangerous. The gun I have? Usually locked in a safe. I don't go waving it around like crazy. But Taurtis? He fires off 'practice' shots randomly. X usually becomes aware when I open the safe. I don't know how he hasn't known yet." Grian opened his eyes, looking at his friends. They looked sympathetic.

     "Why didn't you tell us?" Mumbo asked, wrapping his other arm around Grian in a hug.

     "Maybe because I don't want to relive it? It was such an awful time in my life. I became so depressed and anxious that everyone hated me. It wasn't until I joined Hermitcraft until I started to believe otherwise. I did get shot and stabbed back then. I remember everything no matter how much I hated it. Taurtis' girlfriend got hit by a car and died. I had to fake being the dad of Taurtis and Sam's girlfriend. Barely anyone liked me besides Taurtis and a few other people. I got bullied every day and have never once done anything without thinking of their words. It just... it's awful."

     "Wait, you were shot and stabbed?" Pearl asked him. Mumbo let go, allowing him to move.

     He pulled down his shirt, revealing a scar over his collarbone. "Shot in the collarbone. Bullet is still there." He then rolled up his sleeves, showing off scars along his arms. "Stabbed and sliced up a few times. Nothing too serious besides that one time Sam wanted to practice knife throwing." He pointed to one of them on his elbow. "This was the playground incident. He had thrown his only knife at me. I had to go to the hospital to get this one stitched up." He pulled them down over his knuckles again, Mumbo moving to hug him again.

     "Grian, I hope you know that what Sam had done does not identify who you are." Impulse spoke up, eyes glassy with unshed tears.

      Grian let a small smile fall onto his face. "I know that now that I've found a true family."

---

EXTRA

---

     Xisuma slammed his drawers closed, kicking one of the filing cabinets. He pushed stuff off his desk, mad at the perpetrators.

     "Are you joking me!" He yelled into his comm, the other side crackling.

     "X, we have the file here safe and sound, no need to worry." Scar spoke through it.

     "I am beyond worried!" He shouted. "That is CONFIDENTIAL information! I can't let you lot steal it!"

     "We will return it later, calm down."

     "I'm going to KILL all of you when you return it back to me IN A HOUR! No less! Get here NOW!"

     "Jeez dude, maybe you should take a chill pill."

     If that's the reason why his comm spontaneously broke, he wouldn't tell anyone.

Words: 3183
Written: Wednesday, October 6th, 2021, 10:39 pm
Edited:
Originally posted: Wednesday, October 6th, 2021, 10:42 pm