School AU with Grian being depressed, again. Hoorayyyyy.....

Grian's POV

I sat in my bed, stressed out and crying. I clutched my phone in my grip and was hunched over it, typing frantically to my friend.

Grian: The video won't send for homework!!!!

Mumbo: I know! I have tried contacting Mr. Davis but he hasn't responded. He might push it back or something.

I got a rough feeling in my chest as I breathed in and out heavily. I put down my phone and held my head in my hands.

Mumbo: Grian?

I picked up my phone again and typed again.

Grian: Do you ever just want to kill yourself? Like it all is getting to be too much and all this crap could go away?

Mumbo: .....

My eyes widened when I realized what I was saying.

Grian: I mean, I am not thinking about doing that type of thing!

I was planning to do that type of thing....

Mumbo: Grian? Are you okay?

Grian: Please don't tell anyone! I just am having a tough time! I can handle it though!

Mumbo:..... Please talk to somebody....

Grian: I am okay! I have dealt with this type of thing before!

Mumbo: WAT

Mumbo: Grian I swear to-

I didn't finish reading the message before I threw my phone across the room. I winced when a loud bang came from it. I went over and picked it up, checking my phone and seeing it was okay.

Grian: Please don't tell anyone!

Mumbo: ..... fine

Mymbo: but tell somebody if it gets too much

I sighed in relief.

Grian: Thank you Mumbo! I have to get back to doing other homework now, see you tomorrow.

Mumbo: okay then.... stay safe

I turned off my phone and looked at the large homework folder in front of me. I pulled out my vocab sheets, textbook, blank paper, and some other worksheets to do. I picked my phone up again and saw the assignment failed to send yet again.

/later that evening/

I was just finishing up my homework when I heard a knock on my bedroom door.

"Come in." I said as I finished scribbling down the definition for alumni. My mum opened the door and walked over to me, sitting on the bottom of my bed.

"How are you feeling sweetie?" She asked me softly as I looked up at her in confusion.

"What do you mean?"

"Is everything going all right at school? Mumbo told me some things earlier." She said in a quiet voice and I froze before relaxing.

"I am alright. We have our unit on mental health so he probably wanted to see if I was okay or something." I lied with a smile on my face, perfectly trained to stay in all situations. She nodded her head unsure.

"Okay darling, just tell us if anything is wrong. Daddy and I love you so so much." My mum said as she brought me into a hug. I hugged her back, feeling warmth go through me . Dad was on a business trip so it was just her, me, and my little sister here.

"Love you too mommy." I told her as she helped me finish my homework up, and then put me to bed like she used to do when I was really little.

/next day/

I walked into my classroom, sitting down in my seat next to Mumbo and Ren. Doc sat on the other side of Ren. They weren't here like normal so I quickly did my warmup and spun my pencil around my finger as I waited. They both walked in, Ren flaunting like usual and Mumbo was in a shy stance, no doubt scared about how our friendship would play out. They sat down, Mumbo watching me as I tried to look at the newly hung projects on the walls. Mumbo cleared his throat, turning my attention towards him. he fidgeted with his hands, looking at me nervously.

"Just tell me what you want to say-"

"Grian?" I got stopped by Mrs. Walsh telling me to come up to her.

"Yes?"

"The counselor wants to see you." She told me, handing me a green pass. I got really nervous and scared of the reason so before I left, I glanced at Mumbo who looked down, trying to avoid my eyes.

"BYE GRIAN!!!" Ren shouted, not knowing why I was leaving. I gave him a slight wave back before passing Doc who was just coming in, late as usual, out the door. The halls were empty and intimidating as I walked down to counseling. I walked in and nervously stood there, not knowing what to do since the last time I was here, I knew the reason I came down; telling the counselors about the bullies.

"Grian?" I turned and saw the counselor staring at me.

"I-I got a pass...." I said quietly as I passed it to her.

"Thank you, know how about we have a chat in my office." I nodded my head slightly, following her down to the little room that held a table, and her desk. I sat down at the table and she brought her chair over so she could sit in front of me. "Some of your friends and your parents are concerned about you. How is everything going on at home?"

"I-it is going well. My sister and I are getting along together and my family and I spend time together." I told her, only slightly bending the truth since my sister tolerates me and we only hang out on weekends.

"That sounds good. Now what about your school work?" She asked me, pulling up my grades on her computer.

"It is manageable and I am doing good in my classes." I told her honestly this time.

"That sounds really good. Your mom called earlier and said that you are leaving school early to go to a therapy appointment. Did you know this?" I shook my head no and she pursed her lips. "Okay, it says you will leave before lunch so you should talk to your teachers and get your homework." She told me and I looked at her, kind of shocked. My group has lunch the earliest, aka in the middle of second period. I nodded my head and she handed me my pass back. "We already told some of your teachers so they should have homework ready to give to you. I nodded and left the room, walking down the hall again. Before I got back to class though, I grabbed my homework for today from my teachers and walked back to class. I handed the slip of paper to Mrs. Walsh silently and then walked over to my seat.

"So what was that about?" Ren whsipered and I shrugged while pretending to act like nothing happened.

"Just stuff about next year. No big deal." I glared over at Mumbo who tried to avoid my gaze. The bell rang, signalling lunch time. "I have to leave early for a doctors appointment." I told Mrs. Walsh who handed me my papers. I gladly took them and walked into the hall way to see my friends. I walked over to my locker with them behind me and got my backpack out.

"Where are you going?" Doc asked as I sighed and slung it over my shoulder.

"A doctor's appointment. I won't be back for the rest of the day." I told them while Mumbo looked at me with a guilty look.

"You guys go ahead, I want to talk to Grian for a second." Mumbo told the others who shrugged and walked towards lunch. "I'm sorry-"

"Stop." I said, looking away.

"Grian, I was really worried-"

"So you told people about something I REALLY didn't want anyone to know?" I asked and he looked down.

"I called the suicide hotline and they told me to tell your parents so I found your Mum's phone number and told her. I am really worried about you..." I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. "You aren't going to a doctor's appointment, are you...."

"I am going to therapy again. Twice in one week." I said with a sigh and looked over at Mumbo.

"And the counseling office, talk about what happened?"

"Yup. I need to go now. See you tomorrow...." I told and walked to the office, seeing my Mum talking to the secretaries.

"You ready to go darling?" She asked me and I nodded hesitantly. She took my backpack from me and we walked to the car. "I was thinking that we should go get lunch afterwards at our usual after-therapy place." I nodded my head in agreement. "I can then drop you off for your after school hang out time." She said and I nodded again. I have an outside group consisting of Scar, Cub, Xisuma, Keralis, and Bdouble0 and we meet after school every week. I sighed as we arrived and walked inside, feeling weird to be out of school so early.

/after therapy/

I just lied my way out of therapy. Sure, I know that I should have told the truth but my therapist told me that she would have to tell my mom if anything serious was going on. We left the office and were now eating lunch. I would be on my way to 4th period right now if I were in school. I sipped the cherry coke and played on my phone while my mom read her book. I couldn't wait to go to the afterschool hangout time, especially since I can pretend like nothing happened.

/a couple of weeks later/

Mumbo told all my friends inside school about what happened, them all being very cautious around me now. They avoided some topics specifically about death and always shifted from fun and goofy to serious when I was around. I hated it so much but I guess it helped slightly to know they cared so much. Heck, Mumbo called the hotline for me and managed to find my mum's phone number.

/about a year later/

..... Let's just say we aren't friends any more and I went back to feeling the exact same as last year....