Impulse, meeting Zed: *Terrible internal regrets*

Tango: Oh hey!

Impulse: tHeRe aRe tWO oF tHEm!?

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Xisuma: I was expecting something bad.

Xisuma, vaguely motioning: But I was not expecting this.

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Scar: Oh the reason I'm so good with animals is because they sense my severe and ongoing, never-ending depression.

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Doc, talking about crows: Oh look, a murder! I love murders!

Bdubs, knowing he's talking about birds: Oh yes, they truly are beautiful.

Joe, trying to have a normal day:

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Etho: Careful, if you touch a lightbulb too long it'll burn your finger.

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Wels: You either did or does, there is no do.

Hels: Please, please just stop.

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Bdubs, looking at the snowy ground: The cocaine is here again!

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Etho: It's the first of the month, and you all know what that means!

Etho, with finger guns and a towel: Shower time!

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Xisuma: There's cops! Cops outside! Cops!

Biffa: Why're you scared..?

Xisuma: Good point.

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Grian: I drink laundry detergent so then when I sweat I sweat detergent and wash my clothes.

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Tango, after doing literally anything: Now that's a lotta damage!

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Iskall, optimistically: I'm going to finish my build today!

Ren, just as optimistic: I'm going to die today!

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Grian: Mumbo can I have twenty dollars?

Mumbo: Why?

Grian: I googled happiness online and it costs me five dollars but I want the extra fifteen to get a will to live also.

Mumbo: Here's ten because I know the will to live only costs three.

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Doc, on a walkie-talkie: Bdubs I need you to meet me in the shopping district!

Tango, also over a walkie-talkie: Alpha team this is Golden Eagle I need you to rendezvous at Drop Zone Yankee!

Doc: It's ten minutes into capture the flag when did you come up with code names?!

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Joe: Four-worded depressing sentence challenge number two, go!

Biffa: Murder made me numb.

Mumbo: Her mit cra ft.

Impulse: Zed and tango behaving.

Wels: Hels is now back.

Hels: Wels is still here.

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Cub: Once, I had to rescue Scar from a pack of kittens.

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Wels: Hey did you know that it's better to season the cutting board instead of the meat?

Jevin: When it comes to cooking I prefer to season my mouth, eat my steak raw, and then set myself on fire.

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Bdubs, on his knees and crying: Etho, no! Not again! I'm begging you to stop!

Etho: *Smugly continues*

Bdubs: Etho, please! Not again, please just stop, stop! Stop!

Etho: *Doesn't stop and goes even slower to maximize the pain*

Bdubs: *Crying, screaming, and throwing a tantrum*

Etho: *Finishes eating the middle of the cake*

Etho, holding out the outline of the cake to Bdubs: Delicious!

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Grian: Mumbo! Mumbo! Look-

Mumbo: Is this a joke or did you have a major life relegation?

Grian: No, I had one of those this morning when I realized I wanted a donut.

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Impulse: There's only one difference between humans and animals.

Impulse, motioning to Zed who's doing a weird dance on his way to the fridge: We evolve backwards.

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Scar: I don't want to adult today. I don't even want to human today. Today, I want to cat. If you need me I'll be lying on the floor in the sun, please pet me and bring me snacks.

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Tango: Look, I can argue with you on how incompetent and useless I am all day and you will never win. So let's just move on, ok?

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Impulse: Why did you spray gasoline on Tango!?!?

Zed: I thought it was pepper spray!!

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Joe: Look I pretend to like people everyday, it's called being an adult.

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Bdubs: Hey would it suck if you lost all your progress?

Xisuma, doing admin stuff: Yes now please go die in a hole.

Bdubs: *Shoves Xisuma and exits out everything, deleting his progress*

Xisuma:

Xisuma:

Bdubs: Go to sleep.

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Wels, looking down into a dirt hole: Uhm.. Cub, why are you in that hole..?

Cub: I'm dying in a hole. I will be buried alive. And die. In a hole.

Wels:

Wels: Is there any room for two-?

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Cleo: It would be fun to be burned alive..

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Iskall: Wouldn't it be funny if you like... emailed or something someone at like two am and they responded..?

Etho: *Nodding*

Scar: O-oh! What if you both were up because you were emotionally stressed too?

Tango: Yeah and you both acted like everything was fine?

Iskall: Now that's humor! Nobody ever does that!

Mumbo, Xisuma, Joe & Impulse: *All sharing a look*

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Xisuma: I- it's just- fine. It's fine, do you just promise to never do that again?

Grian: Nope I'm doing it again tomorrow.

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Biffa: You know what? I'm going to kill 30 people and a monkey.

Wels: Why the monkey..?

Biffa: See! Nobody cares about the people I kill then!

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Mumbo: You're like a cloud.

Grian: Why? Because I'm soft and fluffy?

Mumbo: No because when you go away it's a beautiful day.

Grian:

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Xisuma: Why did you blow up half the server!?

Zed and Tango: Uh we wanted to..?

Xisuma:

Xisuma: Impulse why did you let that happen!?

Impulse: What did I do?!

Xisuma: You're the responsible one!

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