All I see is red, everything is blurred up but I know it's pissing me off, like it's hitting on my nerves.
I got this huge urge to let all this out, break something, scream, curse, do anything to get rid of this feeling balled up inside of me. It's annoying, nerve wracking and I don't like it, I wanna get it out of me. I couldn't take it no more, then I just started breaking whatever crossed my way, screamed at the top of my lungs but it wasn't me, I'm a good person I swear. It just got too much, it's like this feeling of anger inside of me got the best of me, it made me think it'll go away if I do what I did, I believed it, but once I started doing so, it took over my body. It wasn't me I swear!
I lost contorl of my body the moment the first lamp broke, after that it was like I was watching as my body was controlled by another force and it kept doing and saying things I wouldn't have done nor said, I was desperate on the inside, I wanted to have control of my body again but I couldn't.
I was just...there, watching as things broke, hearing as words were said or shall I say screamed, trying hard to stop whatever foreign force that was from ruining more than it already did.
After a while of watching what my own hands were doing without me telling them, I seemed to only gain control over my tears for they started falling hard, blurring my vision, and even though it wasn't me who was tearing book shelves off and breaking glass things to pieces it was I who was crying, for I was longing to get my body back yet I was scared to be blamed for what I wasn't responsible for.
Then slowly that foreign force started decreasing and by little by little I started getting my body back...
There was I, standing in the middle of the chaos, starring at what my own hands did -what they did without me having a say in it- leaving me with nothing but my sobs and exhaustion over something I didn't do...