I had my face buried in my pillow as I let out the tears I held back earlier today at school. The moment I got on my bed after a cold shower I just let it all out. I was so overwhelmed by today's activities.

My whole body hurts; my nipples hurt from Daniel sucking and squeezing them violently and my thighs and vagina hurts from his thrusting. I never knew sex  hurts so much. How do people find it pleasurable?

"Sister Tobi, food is ready." I hear Remi's indistinctive voice and mutter the words, "I'm coming," as response.

I hear the door shut close which meant Remi had left the room leaving me all alone. I sit up wiping my wet face with my handkerchief that was on my bed and took a long deep breath trying to regain my composure. I couldn't let my parents or siblings see me like this, they wouldn't back down till they got the reason for I was crying.

My phone screen pop up due to a call and as soon as my eyes read the caller's name I ignore the call by tapping on decline  and turned my phone off. Daniel has been calling since I got home and I keep ignoring his calls. He has sent numerous messages which i haven't replied. Zara and Anna have also been calling but I just am not in the mood to speak to anyone.

All I want now is to be alone.

The irony of it all is that I had no idea why I was crying. He didn't force himself on me, I agreed to it. It was consensual. So why am I feeling sad, feeling bad, feeling horrible, feeling like I did the worst thing in the world?

"Tobi, shey  o ni wa jeun?!" I heard my father's voice.

This made me hurry to the kitchen. I took my plate of fried rice, moimoi and chicken which was made by my mother in celebration of my birthday then proceeded to joining them in the sitting room.

"What took you so long?" Mum asks then placed the bottle of Coca cola in her mouth to drink from it.

"I had things to do in the room. Sorry ma." I apologize while sitting on the sofa which Remi is seated.

We all carried on eating. I forced myself to eat so my parents won't know something was wrong with me. While they were all eating and chatting in merriment of my birthday, I the birthday girl was sad.

My head kept replaying everything that happened at the river. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I couldn't get it out of my head. I didn't want to eat, all I want is my bed. All I want is to cry.

My whole body hurts. The pain I feel in my body is excruciating but the pain I feel in my heart is worse.

Dinner was finally over, I proceeded to my room after dropping my plate in the sink. I sat on my bed and began to think about everything that happened earlier today. Apparently, that's the only thing that has been on my mind. No matter how hard I tried, the thoughts still persisted.

I opened my bottle of Schweppes and took a sip from the half empty bottle. I had taken the Schweppes with my dinner.

Remi enters into the room and lays in sister Deola's bed. "I miss sister Deola." Remi announced and I ignored her. She was away in school, the strike had finally been called off so she rushed back a week ago.

"Sister Tobi, let me taste, please," she smiled begging. I shot her a glare then hissed.

She has no idea what's going on with me, I thought.

"Please na." She begged once more and I took another sip to spite her. "Is it because am begging you?" She pouted a frown following afterwards

"What is your problem for crying out loud?! What sort of problem child do I have as a sister?!" I yelled.

"Ahan, what did I do sef? All because of ordinary drink? Eat it sef, I will report you to Mummy." She said and stormed out of the room.

I hissed. Those were some of the things lastborns enjoyed. Any little thing, I'll tell Mummy or Daddy.

Glossary
Shey o ni wa jeun - won't you come and eat.

Moimoi - beans pudding.

A/N
I'm sorry I kept you all waiting. This chapter was so hard to write. I'm very sorry this chapter is horrible and disappointing.
Also, make sure to stay safe. Covid-19 is real and it's spreading so fast and killing so many people. Practice social distancing and avoid touching your face. Make sure to also sanitize.