Author's POV: 

Life is unpredictable. 

Just as the waves of the ocean come and go, with ups and downs, human life deteriorates. But did people fade away from this world with their death? 

You had never imagined a day like this to come when you'd be at the funeral of someone you loved the most. Someone you were sure would be with you till death. 
It was true, from some view. 

You stared at his picture and the burning incense in front of it. 

You returned to your house with the piece of paper his mother had given you. It said, 'For Y/N, by Tae.' 

You sat on your bed and stared at the paper, letting your heart hurt. Because you couldn't control it. 
You hadn't slept again. 
For the past 5 days, you couldn't sleep.

Every time you even dozed off for some time, you saw him. And hence, you kept trying to sleep.

Just to see him once more.

But you failed.

You opened the paper and saw that it was a letter. 

Dear Y/N, 

If you're getting this then, I must be not here anymore... because, I left this in the drawer my mom would only open if I'm gone. 

So, are you crying right now? If you are, please wipe your tears and give me a beautiful smile.

You chuckled through your tears, imagining him saying that. But you smiled and whispered, "I did." 

Life is a beautiful journey. I hadn't known life could be so beautiful until I realized it. But it might've been too late. I thought life was all about passing the days and surviving. Somehow, that's true as well. But recently, I've been enjoying my life more. Maybe it's because you're with me. 
The first day I saw you in the cafe, I had no idea that you'd become so important to me. I simply got interested because you were so pretty, sitting in that corner. I didn't know why but you attracted me the way no one had ever done. Well... it was even better when I got to know you. I love your smiles, your laughs and everything about you. I thought it was a simple teenage crush but well, I'm an adult now. So are you. 
And... it might be more than that. It might be love. And I don't feel uneasy saying it. I love you. 

I want to see you happy and smiling. Always. I want you to be the best artist and make great art pieces. I want you to make up with your father, for him to realize what a beautiful talented daughter he has. You're a beautiful person Y/N, both inside and outside. And that's what made me fall for you. And probably, a thousand other guys too... who knows? But I can assure you I love you the most. There might be people who'll love you more and better than I could but... for me, maybe, this is the most I can love someone. And I want to give you my all. But it isn't possible anymore since you're seeing this, right? 

But I'll send you lots of love from the skies. Thank you so much for everything. For all the great memories. I experienced love, happiness, grief, comfort, and sympathy... all from you. You are my best friend, my family, and my first love. And my last too. 

I probably will not be your last and that'll always be a regret. But at least I was your first... maybe that is somehow a little comfort to me. Please don't forget me. If it's too hard to remember me then... you can remember me less. I fear being forgotten. I hope you'll keep in touch with our friends, make more memories and receive my good wishes. Happy Birthday for all the wishes I won't be able to give you, Happy New Year for all those, and my comfort will always lie with you despite all hardships. 

I never planned on leaving so early. When I rethink it, maybe God has strange plans. Life always gives us unexpected departures. Things that make no sense, have no logical explanation. Yet, we have to move with the pain of life, grow and balance things along the way. It's fine, if God has this plan for me, I accept it. At least I had such awesome people around me. At least, I saw the love you have for me in your eyes. I truly love that you love me so much, that I feel my heart spark every time I reminisce your face full of love. You're so awesome, you're full of love. I'm glad I could make you love me, as if I won an oscar. I'd love to marry you, have kids with you and hug you when we're old and grey, taking care of you with both of our wrinkled smiles. But if that's not possible, then we can continue when we reunite years later. Till then, always be happy and know that you deserve every ounce of love life gives you. You deserve everything. Please don't forget it, even if you stop loving me, please keep me in your memories... even if for a moment in years, I'll always be watching you from afar. I love you. I always did.

I love you the most. You're my everything, Y/N. Be happy and safe, always. 

Yours truly,

Tae

You cried loudly, clutching onto the letter. Your heart ripped apart at the thought of him not being here anymore. You looked at the sky through the window. 
He was there, right? 

Your parents hadn't spoken a thing against you since that day. Instead, your mother helped you get ready for Taehyung's funeral and your father watched silently. He had been watching the sketches since that night. 
Maybe, he was wrong. And he knew it now.

But wasn't it too late? 

There was no use in crying over spilt milk. Similarly, maybe, there wasn't any use in crying over someone who was no longer here. 
But a human heart didn't have the strength to control its emotions. Tears would fall, and the heart would hurt. As the sudden loss of people shocked us, the grief would stay for a long time. 

You had met up with Mina that night, and Jimin and Jungkook were there too. 

Everyone was quiet. 
Jimin patted your back, "Y/N... let's not forget that dumb head." 
You chewed on your bottom lip, feeling tears well up. You blinked away the tears and nodded, "I won't forget him. Even if you try to make me." 
Jungkook sniffed, looking at the coffee. You all were at the Misty Cafe. And your eyes wandered back to the place you had first seen him. 

The seat near the window. 

The memory flashed vividly in your mind as you smiled a little. The others were talking about something, probably about Taehyung but your mind was somewhere else. 
It was in a happy place. 
A really happy one.

Where he was there. 

The bitter coffee without sugar cubes, the sweet drink, the flower garden, the University, the sneaking out of class and University camp, drinking alcohol, playing truth or dare, the sleepover. 

Regret was there, mixed with all the nostalgia. 

Maybe, if you had been nicer to him, and been more expressive while he was there, he'd been happier. 

But you couldn't turn back time. 

The breakup was the memory that flashed into your mind all of a sudden as you realized how much he might've cared to let go. 
You missed him so much. But he was gone. 

Like a huge empty hole right into your heart, he was also gone. 

—A month later

"I'm sorry I couldn't make much." Taehyung's mother said as you smiled softly, holding her hand. 
"It's alright. The others are running late. Shall we eat?"
"Of course." She said. You looked at the food and noticed Taehyung's favourite dishes. 
"He must've liked you a lot. You know that's his favourite." She said as you looked at her, not knowing what to say. Your heart seemed to be stuck at the base of your throat because it felt so tight. Your chest felt empty and heavy. 

She sighed and looked down, "It feels like his departure left a huge hollow in my life. He'd take care of us after his dad's passing... hope he's being taken care of well." 
You looked down, clutching onto your skirt.

After eating, you were in Taehyung's room. His mother had left to bring Taewoo from Taekwondo. Even though Taehyung wasn't here, everyone's lives had to go on. 

His photo was still hung in the house, the incense was there. 

You sat on his bed and looked around. The memories from the Romeo and Juliet play roamed in your mind. You remembered the day you had come to his house a few months ago.  

—Flashback

"Tae." You called as he smiled, hugging you from the back. You seemed flustered as he pressed a soft kiss on your neck. 
"I won't do anything, I just... like your scent." He whispered.
"Are you okay?" You asked. He chuckled, humming. 
You both sat on his bed as he held your hands, smiling. He tucked your hair strands behind your ears and leaned in closer, placing a soft kiss on your lips. 

You smiled immediately, feeling your heart nearly explode. He pressed another kiss on your lips and was about to go in completely when the door barged open revealing the 3 idiots. 
"What are you guys..." Jimin stopped as Jungkook sighed, "NO PDA!!!" 
"Ew." Mina rolled her eyes as you both sat down properly. Your entire face was red as Taehyung tried not to chuckle. 

—End of Flashback 

You stared at the teddy bear you had given him. It was just there, simply as it always had been. 

"I miss you so much." You whispered. You looked at his closet and opened it. 
His stuff would be packed soon. 
You took one of your favourite t-shirts from him and said, "Should I take it with me?" 
You held it close to your neck and tears left your eyes immediately. It smelled like him.

But the smell would fade away soon. 

Everything would. 

Just like he did.

You lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. You held the t-shirt close to your chest and closed your eyes. You couldn't feel him there. 
His presence was gone. 

Missing someone was bearable. But it became the worst kind of pain when you missed someone you couldn't see again. 

You didn't realize when you fell asleep. 

—Time skip

You frowned, opening your eyes just to see Taewoo and Mina sitting beside you. They both looked at you as Mina asked, "Are you alright? You fell asleep."
"Huh? Why didn't you wake me up..." You asked, looking around.
"You've barely slept the past 2 weeks." She said. You looked down, realizing you had a sound sleep after quite some time. The T-shirt was still in your hand. 

Every time you had slept the past week, you'd have nightmares. 

In one, he left you.
On the other, he was fading in the air. 
But in the recent one, he was smiling and laughing with you. 

It somehow relieved you. Maybe he was happy there. Praying for your welfare.

Days and months passed by in this way. Your heart didn't hurt as much as it did before until it suddenly did, and you almost felt as if you'd passed out. He appeared in your dreams, very rarely, but every time he did, you could've sworn you smiled in your sleep. 

You had gone on a date, pestered by your mother. But as expected, you didn't care. 

Because even though many other people were handsome and kind, caring and awesome, he'd always be your desire. He was your need. 
He helped you acknowledge yourself, speak up, and come out of the little shell you had hidden inside your entire life. 
He was like an angel. 
A guardian angel who had turned your life upside down taught you to love, friendship, care, grief... and simply faded away. 

Like a beautiful dream where we experienced things we'd never forget, he had an impact on your life.

—The year 2040

"And... so, years later, you got married?" Your daughter asked, wiping a tear from her eyes as you hummed, "I wouldn't say I liked your dad at first. But later on, I realized how amazing he was too." 
"Do you love Dad like you loved Taehyung?" She asked. You looked down, "I've always loved Taehyung, dear. I love your father as well, I experienced things, had a family, and lived my life... as an artist. But now, in my early 40s, thinking about that blooming youth, that... love and him, I still do love him. I'll always love Taehyung, dear. He was an angel to me. Your father is my husband, my life partner now but... you see, we can love many people. It's not the same for everyone." 
"My life was like the black bitter coffee until he changed it to the sweet sugary drink. And that... if it meant meeting him, I'd drink bitter sugar cube-less coffee every day..." You spoke again, sighing. 

"But of course, your father makes me the happiest now. This is my life now, I'm the happiest here. I'm not regretful that I have you all in my life, I love you guys the most." You caressed her cheeks. 
"I wish I could meet Taehyung too." She whispered, "He'd love to meet you too." 

She seemed a little sad but she knew where you were coming from. 
"What would you tell him if you could ever talk to him again?" She asked. You hummed, thinking about it, "I'd say that...." 
You took a breath, your entire life flashing in front of your eyes, your moments with him, all those breathes, every single tear and smile igniting your heart as you spoke,

"I'm here. I'll always be here, waiting."

Because in the end, we're always waiting for the ones who'd never return in this life. That's how life goes on.

The End