The room descended into a stifling silence, the kind that clawed at your lungs, making it impossible to breathe. Alaric stood there, every inch of his body taut with tension, his expression darkening as rage bled into the air around him. His fists clenched tight at his sides, veins bulging, the violence in him barely contained.

"You're wrong, Silas," Alaric growled, his voice low, lethal. "I killed them all. Everyone linked to Atlas—anyone who ever crossed us. I buried them all." His words hung in the air like a death sentence, heavy and final. The man I love, the one who cradled my heart in gentle hands, was the same man who had mercilessly reaped the lives of others.

Silas took a step closer, his jaw set in a grim line. "I know, brother. But think about it—there's only one man who stands to gain from our downfall. Yuri Volkov, ex-head of Krutov special forces. He left Ivanov's clan and started his own assassination network. I've been tracking him ever since you went dark. He wanted to merge with us, but I never trusted him. Now I've got proof—the docks had always been under his name, he was the contact that had set up our kill. It's him, Alaric."

A sickening dread curled in my stomach. I didn't know the depths of Alaric's past, but it was clear Atlas was the heart of it. Losing him had shattered whatever light remained in Alaric's soul, leaving him hollow, consumed by a darkness that had festered for far too long. And now... now he had a name. A face to blame for it all.

Alaric didn't move, but I could see the war waging in his eyes, the fury, the unbearable weight of grief he'd carried. His thirst for revenge was a living thing, twisting in the air between us, suffocating, intoxicating. This was the moment he had been waiting for—the moment he could finally unleash the vengeance that had been festering inside him for so long.

Silas's voice cut through the tension like a blade. "Look, going after Volkov without a plan is foolish. He's got men, and his estate is locked down tight. Charging in would be madness."

Alaric's gaze flicked to mine, just for a second, but in that fleeting moment, I saw the unease in him. The need for blood, for retribution, battling with the instinct to protect me. To keep me far from the horrors of his life. But I didn't need the shield, his cruel world was mine too. 

I stepped forward, placing my hand on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath my palm. "You'll kill him, Alaric. That's inevitable. But you need to do it right, think it through and make sure when you do end him, it is done painfully, slowly, freeing..." My voice was soft, steady. I pressed him gently, guiding him to sit in the chair behind us.

Alaric's arm wrapped around my waist as if by instinct, pulling me onto his lap. His body relaxed just a fraction, though the hardness in his voice remained. "Okay, Engel. I'll plan it right, make sure Yuri learns what it means to cross the Todeskreis in exactly that manner."

Silas's gaze dropped to me, his jaw tight, before turning back to Alaric. "We'll take it to him, far away from here. There's too much at stake to risk a war on our home ground."

Alaric nodded.

Silas turned and left us alone, the door clicking shut behind him.

I faced Alaric fully, dread accumulating inside me. "Won't it be more dangerous to kill him on his turf?" I asked, my voice small.

"Yeah, baby, it will. But I can't risk him coming here. I won't let him get anywhere near you. The world has hurt you too much, Vaela, no more." His voice cracked, just for a moment, and the vulnerability in it broke my heart.

I shook my head, tears burning behind my eyes. "It'll drive me mad, Alaric. Sitting here, helpless, while you walk into death's arms. I can't... I can't just sit and wait."

Alaric's hand came up to cradle my face, his thumb gently brushing over my cheek. "You've already seen more of my darkness than I ever wanted you to. I won't be able to think straight if I don't know you're safe. So whenever I have to leave, Vaela... you keep my heart in your hands. Keep it safe until I return, because I will always return, nothing could keep me from coming home to you."

I leaned into his touch, closing my eyes, letting the warmth of his skin anchor me. "Your torment is mine, Alaric. I'm already here. I'm with you—always." Then I gave in, nodding to his words because "I could never deny you anything."

He hummed, flexing his fingers against my skin appreciatively. "Truly?"

I nodded, meeting his eyes. "Of course."

He exhaled slowly, tension leaking from his body as he rested his forehead against mine. "I've been thinking about it for some time and that day I saw you in that damn tub, Vaela, my heart stopped with yours. You need help, baby. You've been through too much. I spoke with Gia... she knows a good psychiatrist. Will you—will you consider seeing her? For me?"

The thought of opening up about my past, of unearthing the trauma I'd buried so deeply, sent panic flaring through my chest. My eyes burned, my throat tightening with fear. But then I saw the pain in his eyes, it was killing him, knowing he couldn't fix this for me. 

So I nodded once more, "will you come with me?" I needed the promise of his presence to face the demons that lurked in my mind, I didn't want to be alone with them and a stranger.

"Yes, mein perfektes mädchen," Alaric breathed, his forehead still pressed against mine. "Beside you is the only place I belong."

I pressed my face into his neck, inhaling the familiar scent of him—of safety, of danger, of everything in between. The fear didn't ease, but being this close to him, feeling his heartbeat steady beneath my palm, gave me the strength to keep going.

"I'll see the psychiatrist."

* * 

Several days passed as Alaric and Silas worked on their plan of attack. Hours upon hours, the brothers locked themselves in Alaric's office, working through every possible outcome. Sometimes I'd sit with them, and sketch while they worked. On other days I'd need an escape, on those days Gia accompanied me. 

Gia, with her usual calmness, stood beside me, plucking a single white rose from its stem, twirling it between her fingers. "You've been quiet today," she observed, her voice gentle but piercing in its insight.

I sighed, my gaze fixed on the horizon, where the sun barely peeked through a blanket of grey clouds. "I don't know how to be anything else right now," I whispered, heavy with the weight of the unsaid. "I'm terrified of what's coming... of losing him. But I can't show it. He needs me strong."

Gia turned to face me fully, her expression softening, but her eyes, as always, were sharp and knowing. "You don't have to pretend with me, Vaela. You've been through more than anyone should, and the idea of facing your own demons while watching someone else battle theirs? It's not easy. Alaric may need you strong, but you don't need to be unbreakable."

Her words hit deep, unravelling some of the tightly wound threads in my chest. "I don't know if I can survive losing him," I admitted, my voice cracking as the thought pushed its way out. "I feel like I'm barely holding it together as it is."

Gia placed the rose gently in my hands, her touch warm. "You won't lose him, Vaela. I've never seen a man more possessed by someone than he is with you. He'll never let anything separate you two, so help him. Help him by starting with yourself." Her gaze flicked to the side, where the house loomed like a shadow over the garden. "He's worried about you, Vaela. More than you know."

I swallowed hard, remembering the look in Alaric's eyes when he spoke about the psychiatrist, the rawness in his voice when he asked me to consider it. He wasn't just trying to protect me from the outside world—he was trying to save me from myself.

"I told him I'd go," I said, more to myself than to Gia, but she nodded in quiet approval. "I'll meet the psychiatrist."

"Good." She smiled faintly, her eyes softening. "Facing the past doesn't mean it will destroy you. Sometimes it's the only way forward."

Just then, the back door creaked open, and Alaric stepped out into the garden, his presence immediately commanding the space. Even when he wasn't trying to, he exuded a silent power that made everything around him seem smaller and inconsequential. His eyes met mine, and despite the hard lines of his face, there was a softness there, a need to close the distance between us.

Gia gave me a reassuring embrace before she slipped away, leaving us alone in the fading light of the garden.

Alaric didn't say anything as he approached, just wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me against him. His touch was possessive, like he was holding onto me not just physically, but emotionally, too—afraid I might slip away.

I tilted my head up to look at him, my fingers brushing over the stubble on his jaw. "How's it going in there?"

His lips pressed into a thin line, his gaze distant for a moment. "It's coming together. Slowly, but it's solid." Then, as if sensing my unspoken fears, he added, "We'll be ready when the time comes."

"And after? What then?"

Alaric's grip on me tightened slightly, a storm brewing behind his eyes. "After... after we're done with Volkov, I kill John and anyone associated with him. Then it's over, baby. For good. No more running, no more looking over our shoulders at demons." 

I leaned into him, pressing my face into his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart. "As long as at the end, when it's all done, I have you, Alaric. I'll take the danger, the blood, all of it—as long as I have you."

He rests his chin on the top of my head. "You're the only light I've got left, Vaela. Nothing will take that from me... Let's get you inside, you need to eat and it's getting cold."

"You're obsessed with me eating," I tease but inside my stomach fills with butterflies because it meant more than he knew, his consideration to me. 

His expression shifted as we stepped inside, his eyes locking onto mine with a depth that made my breath catch. "I need you healthy, Vaela," he said, his voice rough with emotion. Then, his hand slid to rest on my lower abdomen, and the heat that bloomed beneath his touch sent a shiver racing up my spine.

Holy fuck. 

This man... 

* * *

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Love you,

J.