March

Margaret, Agnes and I rush through the halls of Lambeth Palace. Our slippers slide along the smooth, marble floor and golden tapestries flash as we speed past them. Agnes stumbles and crashes into me, and we both tumble to the floor, my face hitting the hard ground.

'Oh my, sorry Kitty!' giggles Agnes. I laugh along with her, our high voices bouncing across the creamy white walls. Margaret doubles over as she laughs, her hands resting on her knees through the thick blue skirts.

'It's alright, Agnes,' I reply, shoving myself onto my feet. I brush down my pastel purple skirts, then fluff it up so it billows out around me. Then I straighten my lilac bodice and French hood. 'Girls, do I look okay?'

'You look amazing, Kitty!' pipes up Margaret. 'You're positively glowing with happiness.'

'I'm sure Grandmother will love your new dress,' adds Agnes. I spin around, giggling as I do so.

Agnes, Margaret and I are all second cousins, and our grandmother is the Dowager Duchess of Norfolk. I moved to her household when I was only four, because my mother died. Agnes and Margaret still have their parents, but they're always off at court.

Anyhow, Grandmother is very strict, but she does enjoy spoiling us, which is why I found a brand-new dress on my bed this morning. I'm guessing it's for my birthday, which is today. I'm twelve now. Isn't that exciting? I'm all grown-up and ready to go to court.

We turn to continue on to sprint to Grandmother's chambers, where she makes sure we're all washing and staying clean.

Agnes and Margaret rush ahead of me as I collect my dress up in my hands, folding it over my forearm so I can run without tripping. I take a step just as a cold, clammy hand grasps my shoulder. I gasp and swivel around, but immediately compose myself when I see who it is.

Grandmother's hair is wound up into a delicate braid that drapes down her back, hidden behind her brown gable hood. Her dress matches her hood; it's a boring brown and the dress is plain with a white apron draped over it.

A young man stands behind her. He's quite handsome, with a brown stubble and flowing, brown hair. Bold, black eyes stand out amongst his pale skin, and he's dressed in an elegant outfit made with rich purples and blues.

'Katherine, I'd like you to meet someone, announces Grandmother. I peek over my shoulder at Margaret and Agnes, who are waiting for me at the doorway that hides in the end of the hallway. I look back and stare into Grandmother's hazel eyes.

'I've been told that you haven't been paying attention in your music lessons,' she says in a stern voice. 'I've been told that you are talking to friends instead. Thus, I've decided to hire this young man to give you private lessons for your lute. Katherine, meet Henry Mannox.'

I curtsy, then bounce back up. 'Hello, good sir,' I say in my polite voice that pleases Grandmother. 'When will my lessons begin?'

'Tomorrow, Miss Katherine,' replies Henry, and then he bows and leaves us. Grandmother raises her eyebrows at me.

'Now, Katherine, you'd better not get into any trouble anymore,' she scolds. 'Your father has been notified, and you shall be sent someplace else if this continues. Do you understand?'

'Yes, ma'am,' I respond, and begin to peek back at my friends but catch myself.

Grandmother makes a noise that's somewhat close to a snort mixed with a scoff. 'You are excused.'

I nod and slowly walk towards Margaret and Agnes, then begin to run when I see that my grandmother isn't looking.

April - TW

Agnes and I stroll through the hall, arm in arm. Our heads bend towards each other as we discuss the latest events. My golden hair brushes against her dark, brown braided hair while my blue eyes stare into her dark, brown ones.

'So, how are your private music lessons going, Kitty?' she asks me in a hushed voice, although we're alone in the empty hallway. Sun beams through the polished glass windows, and snow sparkles on the ground outside.

'Oh, they're boring without you and the other girls,' I complain. "I must confess, Henry is very nice, and a good teacher, but he's very old. I do believe he is twenty-three.'

'And not married?' cries Agnes. 'How embarrassing!'

'Oh, I know,' I scoff. 'But he says he doesn't like to settle yet, so he's waiting.'

Agnes giggles. 'Well, there's the room. You had better run along now and see him.'

'Yes, I will,' I say, and wave goodbye as she heads up to the main music room. The brown, wooden door creaks open and I can see Henry waiting with the lute in his lap. He sits in one chair, and another is set up across from him. Other than that, the room is awfully empty, with only a small table in the corner and silver candles set up all over the place.

'Hello, Miss Katherine,' greets Henry. I nod in greeting, and politely sit down on my seat.

'Good morning, Henry,' I say as he passes me the lute.

'Shall we start off with Verse One, the song we practiced the other day?' he asks. I nod and begin to pluck the strings on the cream instrument. Henry hums along with me, and begins to subtly slide his chair closer to mine. I pretend to not notice, and instead finish the song without any mistakes.

'Perfect,' he whispers into my ear. By this point, his chair is right next to mine. I give a shaky laugh and lean back.

'What shall I play next?' I ask, trying to calm the awkward air enveloping us. Goodness, he's so close that I can feel his hot breath on my neck. Henry gently lifts the lute out of my lap and tosses it on the floor.

'Why don't we take a break?' he asks slyly as he lifts me up and covers my eyes.

Two hours later, when I stumble out of the music room, I'm throbbing with pain. Goodness me, why would he do that? I'm only thirteen, and he's twenty-three! I thought he was more mature than that.

My dress and hair are rumpled, so I stop to peek at a floor-length looking-glass as I smooth it out. I finish just as Agnes, Margaret and the other girls bounce out of their room. Margaret must notice my terrified expression, because she pulls me off to the side and asks if I'm feeling alright.

I clear my throat, because I'm at a loss for words. 'Er-I'm doing just fine. Perhaps a little exhausted, but other than that, I'm completely good.'

Margaret nods, but doesn't say anything else. Instead she pulls me up ahead so we can join the group of happy girls, while inside my stomach is twisted into knots.

May - TW

Finally, I have an excuse to skip my music lessons. It has been going on for a month now, and I really have no idea what to do. I'm too afraid to tell Grandmother, because I may be blamed for it, and Agnes and Margaret wouldn't be able to help me at all. Instead I stay silent, like Henry tells me to do. So while he's shoving me around when I'm supposed to be learning, I'm trying to think of a good excuse for why I can't play a decent song at Grandmother's birthday.

But, as I have mentioned, I have an excuse. My cousin, Anne Boleyn has been beheaded for some reason. I've never met her, but I so wish I had, because she was the queen. How wonderful it must be, to be in charge of everything, and not have men force you to do disgusting little things.

Oh, how I envy her. Not because she's dead, of course. I am jealous of her like I am jealous of Jane Seymour, and Catherine of Aragon.

Now, instead of acting envious, I act sad and depressed because my wonderful cousin whom I never met is dead. Oh, how dreadful! Isn't it? Right? Utterly. Dreadful.

August - TW

Five months. That is how long it's been going on for. Aside from the terrible pain between my thighs that throbs when I leave the music room, he's started to hit me. So now I must hide the scars on my legs and torso along with the secret.

Agnes knows, I think. But I suppose she believes I enjoy it, which I definitely do not. I hate it on so many levels, and I wake up each day with dread, not wanting to ever wake up again. But I do, and I put on a pretty smile and greet Henry in a warm manner.

Sometimes when I enter the dormitory at night, when it's time for sleep, I see boys sneaking into girl's beds and delighted noises fill the air. See, I would be fine with that, but Henry does it harshly, and without my consent.

For now, I sit down in the common room with my friends. Elizabeth is crying because her father won't get her a new dress. Hmph. Look at what I'm going through, and do I cry?

Sometimes the people who are going through the worst pain are the ones who smile the most.

'Kitty Howard!' a girl cries out from across the room. 'Mr. Mannox wants to see you.'

I recoil and gag. 'O-oh, alright. I'll be on my way soon.' I arise, with dark thoughts swirling through my mind, and a girl stands to stop me.

'You're ever so lucky that you get to have him as a music teacher!' she giggles. 'He's so handsome, and not married! Too bad you're only thirteen, though. If you were eighteen, like me, you would bring him to your bed at night.'

I shoot back, 'well, at least I'm not eighteen and still not at court!' Then I rush out of the room. They're all probably wondering why I got so upset, but they don't know. They really don't.

I step into the music room and my eyes meet Henry's. He smirks and slams the door shut, immediately pulling at the strings of my corset.

'Why did you want to see me?' I ask, tugging away from him. Henry snorts and moves closer.

'Because I missed you, sweetie,' he teases. 'You know I can't stand being without you for too long. I think about you at night. I know you think about me.'

It's true. I do think about him when I'm supposed to be sleeping. but not in the way he thinks. I think about how much I wish he were gone.

Henry's right behind me now, slipping my dress off quickly and then pressing his body against mine. My body tenses as I wait for the pain, but suddenly the door swings open and in strides Grandmother.

She gasps and stumbles backwards. I break free of Henry's grasp and slip into my dress quickly, then run to Grandmother's arms. My dress is falling off, draped over my small body, but Henry is completely naked, looking awkward and nervous.

'Grandmother,' I weep. 'Help me.'

'Duchess, it's not what you-' stammers Henry, but my grandmother cuts him off.

'What have you done to Katherine? How long has this been going on?' she hisses.

'Five months!' I pipe up, because I know that Henry will lie.

'You two shall never be alone together again!' announces Grandmother. She looks down at me and asks if he did this without my consent, and then she notices the wounds that are scattered around me.

She steams up and strides to him, then promptly slaps him right in the cheek. As Grandmother leaves, her hand catches mine and she tugs me out of the room.

When we're outside and the door is shut, she helps me into my dress.

'Katherine, you need to tell me if you're alright,' she commanded.

'Yes, I am,' I reply. Tears stream down my face, and I wipe them away, but it's like they're never ending.

September

The autumn air is arriving, for the air is full of chilly breezes and crispy leaves. Agnes, Margaret and I are strolling outside, our slippers crunching against the fallen leaves and dead grass.

'So, have you seen Mr. Mannox since?' asks Agnes. We're all enjoying one last meaningful chat together, for Margaret is leaving for court tomorrow.

'No!' I snap. 'I'm never going to lay my eyes on his disgusting body ever again!'

'Good for you,' says Margaret. 'That truly is revolting. I'm sorry you felt that way. But you honestly should have told one of us.'

I sigh. 'I know, I should have. But I didn't think anyone would care.'

'Kitty, you know that I would jump off a cliff for you!' argues Agnes.

'Me too!' agrees Margaret.

'Yes, but you're both so different from me,' I sigh. 'I mean, Margaret, you're fifteen and heading off to court to marry. Agnes, you're fourteen and have had multiple boys in your bed who care about you. I'm thirteen, and dull and was abused.'

'Oh, darling, never ever say that!' scolds Margaret. 'After all, it's not your fault he did that to you. And there is never a moment where you're dull.'

'Right,' agrees Agnes. 'You're energetic, and amazingly fun.'

'But I'm not the brightest,' I groan. 'I'll ever have the education you girls had.'

'Never let that put you down, Kitty,' Margaret says comfortingly, as she swung her long arm around my shoulders. Agnes catches my hand, and together I stroll through the red and orange garden with my two very best friends.